Ask Nick Barkaway!

I Am One Of The Few Honest Dogs I've Ever Known! Proudly living with Japvas Gatber (@alien-gatsby)!!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Oh, dear... where am I?

I could have sworn I wasn't chasing that squirrel this far from home... where am I? Who are all of you? What even are all of you?

Jay? ...Are you here too?

ooc: Heyyy guys it's the admin of @the-mister-jay-gatsby again (yes I have way too many blogs)

I might not do a drawing with every ask but I'm going to try often! I made this design for him as a dog earlier and couldn't resist making this overly stupid askblog

No angst this time!! I promise

Compiling all the LORE so far:

He's very silly. East and West Egg are East and West Bowl now (short for East/West Dog Bowl) and he's neighbors with Jay Barksby (no I will never stop with the horrible puns). "Cat" and "Mutt" are basically slurs in his universe (seeing as it's made up of mostly dogs, although some dogs have more "feline"-adjacent traits)

The cats in his world did exist at one point (hence why some dogs have feline ancestry- pretend that's possible) but were phased out entirely in a sickness. Dogs were resistant to the illness, and cats were not. Dogs with feline ancestry were only hit partially by the sickness, weakening them and causing society to look down on them. (Hence why Cat is a bad word)

Wolves also exist, but they're seen as dirty, wild, and inhuman (for lack of a better term). Gatsby is a wolf, but Nick is stupid and never figured that out. (They're referred to as "Mutts" very often, hence the bad word)

[ask-pammy-buchanan]

Hi hi!! We’re here!

~ @alien-gatsby

Nooo!!! [ baby giggling ] Mistah Gatbah!!!

Use door!! Door!!!

I show you!!!

[ toddler running ]

THIS! open d-

[ toddler SQUEAL and grab his hand ]

MONSTAHH!!!

[alien-gatsby]

GGGUAUAagah WHERE?! Oh! Ohhh, This is a dog, hatchling!! ( @ask-nick-barkaway ) He’s very friendly, see!!

[ask-pammy-buchanan]

Nuh uh!!! Is scary!!!

[ hiding behind him ]

Gonna eat me!!! Eat my face off!!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Excuse me! I am very civilized, thank you!

[alien-gatsby]

He’s nice, I swear!

Um- Nick, thiiis is uh… Human child (I never got your name I don’t think…!), ‘nd this is Nick!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Well, um... it's wonderful to meet you! Whatever your name is.

[ask-pammy-buchanan]

Hi hi!! We’re here!

~ @alien-gatsby

Nooo!!! [ baby giggling ] Mistah Gatbah!!!

Use door!! Door!!!

I show you!!!

[ toddler running ]

THIS! open d-

[ toddler SQUEAL and grab his hand ]

MONSTAHH!!!

[alien-gatsby]

GGGUAUAagah WHERE?! Oh! Ohhh, This is a dog, hatchling!! ( @ask-nick-barkaway ) He’s very friendly, see!!

[ask-pammy-buchanan]

Nuh uh!!! Is scary!!!

[ hiding behind him ]

Gonna eat me!!! Eat my face off!!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Excuse me! I am very civilized, thank you!

[ask-pammy-buchanan]

Hi hi!! We’re here!

~ @alien-gatsby

Nooo!!! [ baby giggling ] Mistah Gatbah!!!

Use door!! Door!!!

I show you!!!

[ toddler running ]

THIS! open d-

[ toddler SQUEAL and grab his hand ]

MONSTAHH!!!

[alien-gatsby]

GGGUAUAagah WHERE?! Oh! Ohhh, This is a dog, hatchling!! ( @ask-nick-barkaway ) He’s very friendly, see!!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Hello!!

[alien-gatsby]

Mistah Gatbah!!

When you visit again?? Play dollies togethah!!

I lave you.

- @ask-pammy-buchanan

Ooh yes!! I could bring my friend if you’d like - he’s a dog but he’s very sweet! I think you’d like him too, old sport!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

I GWT TO GO SOMEWHERE?!

Is it in a car? PLEASE SAY WE'RE TAKING THE CAR!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

But what happens when @alien-gatsby goes home

Does he take you with him

...I'm not sure?

Oh, dear, I hadn't even thought of that! What if I get left behind?

[alien-gatsby]

Um-

Can.. Can dogs survive in a Vrelipzien atmosphere..?? Surely- It couldn’t be that difficult- r..ight…?

[ask-nick-barkaway]

A what atmosphere?! I-

I'll find a way. Don't worry.

[alien-gatsby]

A- nNnonono, no- Nn..??? I think it’d be easier for the two of us if I stayed here - no risks!! Only the um. Absence. I love my planet, I really do old sport, but I want to be here, n.. I’m sure they’ll hardly notice I’m gone!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

You really want to stay?

I've really been hoping you'd say that, to be completely honest with you. Are you sure you'll be alright?

Also, what's wrong? You're worried, I can tell.

[alien-gatsby]

’s nnothing..! I.. don’t..? Ugh M,yy eyz aare ll..eakkin’… wha-t..

Oother friends o-f miine are here, the,, they’ll notice I’m not leaving-

[ask-nick-barkaway]

It'll be okay! You don't have to stay here for my sake. Maybe there's a way for me to survive where you come from! Or- Or if you have to stay, maybe your friends will want to stay with you!

[alien-gatsby]

Aggh.. Sorry, old sport. I don’t know what’s been up with me lately- Thank you for the patience..

I suppose I should ask them when it passes… Maybe they’ll be able to hellpp with- technology n’ that.

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Yes!! That's a great idea. I'll come with you!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

But what happens when @alien-gatsby goes home

Does he take you with him

...I'm not sure?

Oh, dear, I hadn't even thought of that! What if I get left behind?

[alien-gatsby]

Um-

Can.. Can dogs survive in a Vrelipzien atmosphere..?? Surely- It couldn’t be that difficult- r..ight…?

[ask-nick-barkaway]

A what atmosphere?! I-

I'll find a way. Don't worry.

[alien-gatsby]

A- nNnonono, no- Nn..??? I think it’d be easier for the two of us if I stayed here - no risks!! Only the um. Absence. I love my planet, I really do old sport, but I want to be here, n.. I’m sure they’ll hardly notice I’m gone!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

You really want to stay?

I've really been hoping you'd say that, to be completely honest with you. Are you sure you'll be alright?

Also, what's wrong? You're worried, I can tell.

[alien-gatsby]

’s nnothing..! I.. don’t..? Ugh M,yy eyz aare ll..eakkin’… wha-t..

Oother friends o-f miine are here, the,, they’ll notice I’m not leaving-

[ask-nick-barkaway]

It'll be okay! You don't have to stay here for my sake. Maybe there's a way for me to survive where you come from! Or- Or if you have to stay, maybe your friends will want to stay with you!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Mr. Barkaway, can I send you pictures of my dog?

Of course!!

[this-wretched-old-routine]

Her name is Lucky Charlie, and she’s a German Shepard !!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

She looks very friendly!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Mr. Barkaway, can I send you pictures of my dog?

Of course!!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

But what happens when @alien-gatsby goes home

Does he take you with him

...I'm not sure?

Oh, dear, I hadn't even thought of that! What if I get left behind?

[alien-gatsby]

Um-

Can.. Can dogs survive in a Vrelipzien atmosphere..?? Surely- It couldn’t be that difficult- r..ight…?

[ask-nick-barkaway]

A what atmosphere?! I-

I'll find a way. Don't worry.

[alien-gatsby]

A- nNnonono, no- Nn..??? I think it’d be easier for the two of us if I stayed here - no risks!! Only the um. Absence. I love my planet, I really do old sport, but I want to be here, n.. I’m sure they’ll hardly notice I’m gone!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

You really want to stay?

I've really been hoping you'd say that, to be completely honest with you. Are you sure you'll be alright?

Also, what's wrong? You're worried, I can tell.

[ask-nick-barkaway]

But what happens when @alien-gatsby goes home

Does he take you with him

...I'm not sure?

Oh, dear, I hadn't even thought of that! What if I get left behind?

[alien-gatsby]

Um-

Can.. Can dogs survive in a Vrelipzien atmosphere..?? Surely- It couldn’t be that difficult- r..ight…?

[ask-nick-barkaway]

A what atmosphere?! I-

I'll find a way. Don't worry.

[ask-nick-barkaway]

But what happens when @alien-gatsby goes home

Does he take you with him

...I'm not sure?

Oh, dear, I hadn't even thought of that! What if I get left behind?

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Imagine being a dog.

Couldn't be me.

I... I don't have to imagine it. I am a dog.

What's wrong with it?

[alien-gatsby]

So did you like. Adopt @ask-nick-barkaway

Is he like your dog now or

Is that what it’s called? I suppose! Heyy, old sport (@/ask-nick-barkaway)! Are you my dog..??

[ask-nick-barkaway]

...I'm not sure. I- is that- do you- would you like me to be?

[alien-gatsby]

Only if that’s what you want to be-!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Okay then! I- I guess I am!

[alien-gatsby]

Ooh hooray! I’ve been observing human to dog behaviours ever since you popped in, I think I figured it out too! Check it,,

[pat pat]

[ask-nick-barkaway]

...You're amazing, you know that?

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Pspsps hey puppyyyy

Can you eat these shoes for me @jay-gatsbys-shoes

Eat shoes?! Why would I do that?! What do you think I am, a feline?!

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

:(

Yeah! He's a respectable member of the public. He ain't no cat!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Thank you!

Although... can you say that word? Is that... not a bad word here?

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

What? Cat?

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Why would you say it again?!

Yes, that word!

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

Well, it isn't a bad word in this universe. If I say something like "Oh, look over there, that's a nice cat!", I don't get told off for it. Is it like a profanity or something where you're from, dog?

[ask-nick-barkaway]

It's a really offensive thing to call anyone, especially a feline... it's like telling them they're weak and cowardly.

Is it seriously okay to say it here?!

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

Yeah, it's okay to say it here. We don't use it as a slur or anything. We use it more as like..uh..an object or a noun rather than...that.

So just don't be surprised if when you hear two people talking you hear "Oh, your cat is simply adorable!" or something like that.

Apologies for any offence.

[ask-nick-barkaway]

...Really?

Wow. You all are strange. Nice, but strange.

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

Yeah, I ain't the strangest thing here, trust me.

We got a talking car, talking sign, talking bullet, talking sign... oh god, don't even get me started on the drug-filled Spider-Nick.

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Talking cars? Signs? Wait, THERE'S A SPIDER?!

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

Well..erm...they might be filled with cocaine. I wouldn't stomp on 'em if I were you. They run across the floor like little cheetahs.

[ask-nick-barkaway]

...

@alien-gatsby I'm scared come pick me up :[

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

🕷🕷🕷🕷🕷🕷🕷🕷🕷

OH NO THE HORDE IS HERE!!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

@ /alien-gatsby HELP ME PLEASEE

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Pspsps hey puppyyyy

Can you eat these shoes for me @jay-gatsbys-shoes

Eat shoes?! Why would I do that?! What do you think I am, a feline?!

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

:(

Yeah! He's a respectable member of the public. He ain't no cat!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Thank you!

Although... can you say that word? Is that... not a bad word here?

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

What? Cat?

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Why would you say it again?!

Yes, that word!

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

Well, it isn't a bad word in this universe. If I say something like "Oh, look over there, that's a nice cat!", I don't get told off for it. Is it like a profanity or something where you're from, dog?

[ask-nick-barkaway]

It's a really offensive thing to call anyone, especially a feline... it's like telling them they're weak and cowardly.

Is it seriously okay to say it here?!

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

Yeah, it's okay to say it here. We don't use it as a slur or anything. We use it more as like..uh..an object or a noun rather than...that.

So just don't be surprised if when you hear two people talking you hear "Oh, your cat is simply adorable!" or something like that.

Apologies for any offence.

[ask-nick-barkaway]

...Really?

Wow. You all are strange. Nice, but strange.

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

Yeah, I ain't the strangest thing here, trust me.

We got a talking car, talking sign, talking bullet, talking sign... oh god, don't even get me started on the drug-filled Spider-Nick.

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Talking cars? Signs? Wait, THERE'S A SPIDER?!

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

Well..erm...they might be filled with cocaine. I wouldn't stomp on 'em if I were you. They run across the floor like little cheetahs.

[ask-nick-barkaway]

...

@alien-gatsby I'm scared come pick me up :[

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Pspsps hey puppyyyy

Can you eat these shoes for me @jay-gatsbys-shoes

Eat shoes?! Why would I do that?! What do you think I am, a feline?!

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

:(

Yeah! He's a respectable member of the public. He ain't no cat!

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Thank you!

Although... can you say that word? Is that... not a bad word here?

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

What? Cat?

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Why would you say it again?!

Yes, that word!

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

Well, it isn't a bad word in this universe. If I say something like "Oh, look over there, that's a nice cat!", I don't get told off for it. Is it like a profanity or something where you're from, dog?

[ask-nick-barkaway]

It's a really offensive thing to call anyone, especially a feline... it's like telling them they're weak and cowardly.

Is it seriously okay to say it here?!

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

Yeah, it's okay to say it here. We don't use it as a slur or anything. We use it more as like..uh..an object or a noun rather than...that.

So just don't be surprised if when you hear two people talking you hear "Oh, your cat is simply adorable!" or something like that.

Apologies for any offence.

[ask-nick-barkaway]

...Really?

Wow. You all are strange. Nice, but strange.

[jay-gatsbys-shoes]

Yeah, I ain't the strangest thing here, trust me.

We got a talking car, talking sign, talking bullet, talking sign... oh god, don't even get me started on the drug-filled Spider-Nick.

[ask-nick-barkaway]

Talking cars? Signs? Wait, THERE'S A SPIDER?!