Starboy and Princess

Hey, I'm Craig Tucker. I'm 18 and about to start my freshman year of college. Apparently Kenny and I are going to be roommates and he thought that some random internet people would care about our "epic collegiate journey." Ask us things, I guess? [ Collaboration of https://katanachan.tumblr.com & https://crimson-dynamo.tumblr.com ] Banner by: Kiyan200.tumblr.com

[ask-starboy-and-princess]

Butters: Oh, well thank you. I don’t wanna say it’s okay, because it’s definitely not. But I’m used to it, I s’pose? I’m just glad I was able to get outta there and be with people who love an’ support me an’ my dreams.

Butters: Aw, shit. I know I shouldn’t ‘a said anything.

Butters: Well...

Butters: I guess I can say it’s a guy? But that’s not all that surprising since I’m bi. I’m not curious anymore, either! Now I know for sure.

Butters: That’s all you’re gonna get outta me! I’m still trying to figure things out for myself, so I don’t wanna share it with the world yet.

Butters: And...no, they’re single, too.

Butters: Aaah! Now I get what Tweek means when he talks about pressure!!

[ask-starboy-and-princess]

Butters: Well, gosh, fellas it’s been way too long! 

Butters:  Everyone’s been so busy with everythin’ that I didn’t even notice all the messages you guys were sending me.  But I’m here to answer some of ‘em now!

Butters:  In a manner of speakin’, yeah, I’m doin’ pretty great.  There’s been a lot goin’ into my fashion line for school, but I’m real happy with the garments I’ve been able to design and make!

Butters:  Oh...uh, well me and my parents aren’t on real good terms right now, if I’m bein’ honest.  My dad was real cross with me when I wanted to major in fashion, and my mom just kinda went along with him, so. 

Butters:  Aw shit, I-I don’t wanna bring down the mood or anythin’! 

Butters:  I mean, yeah.  It’s been hard not really feelin’ like I’ve got much of a family, but I’ve got my friends here with me, and they’re just the best.  Even Eric! He’s had a lotta personal growth, that’s what Heidi says. 

Butters:  A ship??? What, like the whole thing that happened with Tweek an’ Craig? Well gosh, uh, well I guess the name ‘bunny’ is real cute!

Butters:  ...Oh.  Uh.

Butters:  Y’all are real nosy for a buncha internet strangers.  But...well, I...I guess I can tell you that I care about Kenny a whole lot.  He’s one of my best friends. 

Butters:  An’ I don’t read the blog.  I’m the kinda guy who likes to experience life as it happens, y’know? Instead lookin’ at it through a screen. 

Butters:  But...I might have a crush on someone, if you really wanna know.  I’m gonna regret sayin’ that.

Butters:  Aw, hamburgers. 

[Butters is open for questions]

[ask-starboy-and-princess]

Kenny: Hey guys, before we start up the ask blog again, the creators wanted to break the fourth wall to apologize for the hiatus.

Kenny: Sometimes depression can hit us out of no where, and that’s what happened. And you know, it’s hard for creators to push through, just like anyone else.

Kenny: The Creators of this blog had some rough times since our last update. Which caused the hiatus.

Craig: Depression is a serious issue. If you or someone you know are suffering from depression, please talk to a friend or family member, or talk to them.

Kenny: It’s never fun to be in a dark place alone.

Tweek and Craig: So reach out.

Kenny: You don’t have to be alone.

Tweek: Now back to our regularly scheduled torture of Kenny. (Did Butters read the letter?)

Craig: Shhh, Tweek. He’s sensitive.

Kenny: UNNNNGGG.

[ask-starboy-and-princess]

Kenny: You aren’t gonna see anything friend, that letter needs to be burned. This was a mistake. I need to destroy the evidence.

Kenny: The only thing I’m going to do is burn that letter.

Kenny: Wait.

Kenny: That’s not a bad idea.

[kiyan200]

Header I did for @ask-starboy-and-princess !! also only see-able on mobile 8′D

[ask-starboy-and-princess]

Craig: So, sorry we’ve been quiet for a while, midterms are a bitch. But it looks like you guys have still been busy, because look at this.

Kenny: I have to pause my sorta-midish-life crisis to freak out about being animated. Oh my god this is cool!

Craig: ...I mean. You’re always kinda animated.

Kenny: Yeah, but not like this.

Craig: Fair point.

Kenny: Thank you for enjoying our stupid blog enough to draw us?

Craig: Seriously, thank you. I’m shocked that anyone reads this let alone drew us.

Craig: If we had a refrigerator, it would go up on it.

Kenny: Yeah, Craig will go buy a fridge so we can put it up!

Craig: Craig will not because Craig is broke.

Kenny: Party pooper. Anyway, shout out to @kiyan200 for being that guy, you’re the dude-dude! Now if you excuse me I’m planning a one way trip to anywhere but here.

Craig: Dude. Deep breaths. It’s gonna be fine.

[ask-starboy-and-princess]

Kenny: So ... it's been a while since we've had time to talk. Heck, it's been a while since I was able to talk to anyone. We've been so flippin' busy with Buttercup's fashion show.

Kenny: But you see, tomorrow is Valentine’s day. And I tried to ask Butters if he was busy and well, he was. Kenny: Laughs nervously Kenny: And I got to thinking.

Kenny: WHAT IF I JUST TELL HIM? RIGHT? Kenny: Stupid idea. Completely idiotic. Kenny: Really, really, dumb. But then, the next thing I knew... I was writing a letter.

Kenny: Long story short, I have to leave the country before Butterbear gets to his dorm room. Kenny: Does anyone know how to get a rush passport?

Kenny: Goodbye dear school, I liked you a lot. Kenny: Oh man, Craig’s gonna need to apply for a new roommate too.

[ask-starboy-and-princess]

Clyde:  I’m not too sure about whatever happened between Kenny and Butters at the party, but I do have a short video in which Craig turned from his usual giraffe self into a majestic gazelle. 

Clyde:  ...Or maybe a cheetah made entirely of limbs.  

Clyde:  Whatever.  Roll that beautiful bean footage!

Clyde:  You look awful grumpy there, Sakura-chan.  

Tweek:  Oh, you mean because some assholes d-decided to leave my blackout drunk friend alone at a frat party? Or that some other fuckhead got my boyfriend drunk off his ass, and now I have to wrangle two idiots back to their dormroom?

Clyde:  Hmm....nah, I don’t think that’s it.  

Tweek:  I swear to fucking-

Craig:  MOVE, I’M GAY!!!

Clyde:  Dude....was that Craig carrying Kenny?

Tweek:  OhmyGod, Craig he’s gonna puke!

Clyde:  Wh-

Tweek:  NOT THE PUNCHBOWL, JESUSCHRIST!!!!!

[ask-starboy-and-princess]

Kenny:  Damnit, this is so frustrating. 

Craig:  What is?

Kenny:  It’s already December and I still have no idea what happened at the party. 

Craig:  Well, school kinda took over.  Finals and all that fun shit. 

Craig:  Plus, if it hasn’t come up yet, it’s probably nothing major.

Kenny:  That’s easy for you to say.  Your boyfriend seems to know what happened.

Craig:  Oh yeah, he totally knows.

Kenny:  ...Wait, what, really?

Craig:  Yup.  But he said he wouldn’t tell me.  He just said that you’d have to talk to Butters to figure it out. 

Kenny:  ....

Kenny:  Fuck. 

Craig and Kenny:  Merry Christmas!!!

[Asks are open!]

[ask-starboy-and-princess]

Cartman:  The next interview for my innovative new Netflix documentary series is Craig.

Craig:  Your what?

Cartman:  Shut up and take it, Craig.

Clyde:  I dunno, man, he might like that.

Cartman: ...I swear to God, Clyde, my hate for you grows each day.  Kenny is a much better film partner.  He may be dirt poor, but at least he can take direction.

Clyde:  Okay, for one: rude.  For two, it’s not like you can even ask Kenny to help.  He’s so gone.

Craig:  Wait, wait, Kenny’s gone?

Tweek:  Hey guys...uhm...I-I feel like I missed something.

Cartman:  Not really.  I was just about to tell your boytoy here that our dear Kenneth is black-out drunk.  He went hard on the punch.

Cartman:  [whispers] Yes, exactly like I knew he would.

Clyde:  ....What?

Cartman:  Oh, nothing, Clyde.  Nothing. 

Craig:  Dude, what the fuck.  Is he okay? Tweek:  You just left him there?!  I-I’m gonna go find him.

Craig:  I’ll come, too.

Tweek:  Craig, stay here and make sure t-these assholes don’t stir any more shit.  I’ll text you when I find him.

Cartman:  It seems the small gay is the hunter, much like a lioness in the savanna-

Tweek:  Get that fUCKING THING outta my fACE, Cartman!!

Cartman:  Wow...it also seems that he has some serious anger issues to work through.

Craig:  Dude.  Fuck you.

Cartman:  The gay giraffe is a defensive giant-

Clyde:  Cartman, I suggest you run. 

[ask-starboy-and-princess]

Tweek: I remember everything.

Tweek: I d-don’t drink from unopened bottles.

[theeldergays]

Okay! Hello and SALUTATIONS friends! 

Djinn and I ( @theeldergays ) have decided to run a public server because of tumblr’s downfall. It’ll be a place for our Ask blog, Published writing and for a community of South Park fans to join and have fun. 

It’ll help everyone keep up with updates as well!

This will be a public server and you’re more than welcome to invite others to the server and post it on social media. - Kat

https://discord.gg/xPgvxj

[ask-starboy-and-princess]

Kenny: Hey look at that, you can actually talk to us on social media now. Wild.

Craig: As If Tumblr isn’t social media.

Kenny: Shut it, Tucker.

Craig: Oops, Kenny posted a invalid invite.

Kenny: Yeah, sure. Blame me. Mulligan.

‪https://discord.gg/dZbVDGm‬

[ask-starboy-and-princess]

Clyde:  I’ll be over later to kick you sluts into shape.  I’ve got a literal crap-ton of greasy food.  I gotchu, babes.

Clyde:  Buuuuuuuuut in the meantime, here’s one of my snaps from the partaaay~

Clyde:  As you can tell, I’m a fantastic artist. 

[ask-starboy-and-princess]

Kyle:  Since you guys seem pretty fucked up still, I thought I’d throw in some stuff I had from the party. 

Kyle:  And what better way to start than with Butters because I think I certain someone [coughKennycough] needs his memory jogged just a little bit. 

Kyle:  Give us a spin, Butters!

Stan:  Wow...that, uh, that's a lot of ass, dude.

Butters:  Oh well gosh, thank you for the astute observation, Stanley.

Kyle:  He's Lady Gaga, what do you expect?

Stan:  He wasn’t last year with those...uh...y’know. 

Kyle:  You can say “assless chaps”, dude. 

Stan:  Yeah, I know that.  But...I mean, good job, Butters. 

Stan: There's...glitter and everything.

Butters: Eyes up here, Maverick.

[ask-starboy-and-princess]

Tweek:  As you might be able to deduce, these two idiots are hungover.

Kenny:  [muffled groaning]

Craig:  ...Same.

Tweek:  My poor, sweet, stupid boys.

Craig:  Babe...please, please stop shouting.

Kenny:  [muffled agreement]

Tweek:  And since they’re, uh...incapacitated, I sent out the password to our friends to see i-if anyone had pictures or anything from last night.

Tweek:  ...Because they don’t seem to be able to remember much of anything.

Craig:  Not true. I remembered my phone.

Tweek:  That’s not...t-that doesn’t count.

Kenny:  [muffled talking]

Craig:  See? Kenny gets it.

Tweek:  Jesus, are you serious...

Craig:  I think m’already getting...stuff.

Tweek:  I want to roll my eyes, but I think they’d fall out of my head.

[ask-starboy-and-princess]

Kenny:  Happy Halloween from your friendly, neighborhood Team 7!

Tweek:  Is the PC house really Konoha now?

Craig:  Why the fuck not.  Happy Halloween!

[Asks for all characters are now open!]

[ask-starboy-and-princess]

Tweek:  N-now that I’m here, are you ready to uh....t’get your muffin buttered?

Craig:  Oh my God, babe.

Kenny:  ...I can’t believe you told him...

Tweek:  Craig didn’t have to tell me anything.  You’re kind of really obvious, Kenny.

Kenny:  I...okay, it can’t be that obvious. 

Craig:  You’re pretty obvious, dude.

Tweek:  I think that m-maybe the only thing that would be more obvious is if all your shirts said “Bang Me, Butters” or something like that.

Kenny:  ...Uh huh.

Tweek:  Maybe he’s into, like...roleplay or something, and Halloween really gets him going.

Craig:  You could show him a jutsu or two.

Kenny:  Wow.  You guys are hilarious.  I think I could actually die.  Because of how funny you are.  Oh God.  I see the light already. 

Kenny:  Is my sarcasm palpable?  I hope you chuckle-heads can fuckin’ feel it.

Tweek:  Heh...sorry, man.

Craig:  You know we just want you to be happy.  We give you shit because we care.

Kenny:  Yeah, yeah.  I get it.  Even if you’re sucky assholes sometimes.

Tweek:  That’s definitely Craig.

Craig:  Dude.

Kenny:  ...I’m listening.

Craig:  No.  No, no comment.  Just focus on asking out Butters.  If you can.  If not, well.  I mean, we’re there still.

Tweek:  I’m just glad I get to spend Halloween w-with my two favorite people.

Kenny:  ...Sucking ass?

Craig:  ....Goddamnit.

[ask-starboy-and-princess]

Damien: Nice.