WHISKEY, TANGO, WHISKEY

Lima, alpha, delta

[ask-the-syndicate]

[Uplink activated…]

[Connection established, opening communications channel]

Good day operatives, and.. others. This is Operative Mercury, how may I assist you?

(Hey there! This is an ask blog inspired by the Syndicate bad guys from Space Station 13! Feel free to send in an ask, but keep it mature. AKA, no lewd stuff.)

[ask-the-syndicate]

elephant green screen effect

"Beg pardon?"

[ask-the-syndicate]

evil scary dillar

“I beg your pardon?”

[ask-the-syndicate]

wait youre still alive i thought you died

@ask-nt-high-command

"Pretty sure I'm still alive, I haven't gotten blown up or shot yet."

[ask-the-syndicate]

S.E.L.F. sure are suckers, aren't they? Why're they on our team again?

"Hey, the more the merrier right? I'd rather have those eggheads on our side rather than getting in our way."

[ask-the-syndicate]

500 slipocalypse grenades

"How fucking dare you. I am not cleaning that mess up."

[ask-the-syndicate]

"Hey, so like... I have been going to therapy, and well... Uh... they said that working with your group wouldn't be good for my mental health... So I did a background check, uh... He was some NT dude, so... I think I really want to join the Syndicate." *I tap on the mic twice* "Please don't tell me its on mute... Anyways, uh... during the time I was between jobs, I kinda taught myself how to like... mess with frequencies, and how to make a ton of Black Market Uplinks... So I kinda made some friends with some people in the FTU, but NT REALLY hates me now... and I think I might have some sort of deathsquad raiding the planet I take shelter on right now... So, if you have some sort of station I can live on, that would be appreciated. Also, I think I should have scrambled my signal beforehand, so... You might need to act faster now, sorry..."

"Honestly, you aren't the first to get into a situation like this. I will broadcast a couple of safehouses we have in the star sector; you just need to find a shuttle to get to them. But if you have the credits for it, I'm sure you can get some shuttle pilot to fly you out of there."

"Just check which ship you are getting on board, paying an NT friendly ship for travel is probably not the best idea."

[ask-the-syndicate]

hey, want free easy corporate documents 4 cheap? click here for more

"...I think I will pass, thanks."

[ask-the-syndicate]

Honk! Bananald peal! Slip and u fall.

....You have five minutes.

[ask-the-syndicate]

hav u payd yor clown taks?

"Sorry, my clown what?"

[ask-the-syndicate]

Hey uhh. i think i found that cat that said "death to nanotrasen" earlier. turns out it even has a mini-bomb implant, suprisingly friendly too.

“Ah, neat.. Uh, you uh might want to get the implant out. Just for safety’s sake.”

[ask-the-syndicate]

update on the boat they have a fUCKING BLUESPACE ARTILLERY CANNON SOMEHOW PLEASE SEND HELP

-anonymous syndicate agent

“HOW THE HELL DID THAT GET HERE?!”

“Don’t yell at me, contact your local nukies!”

[ask-the-syndicate]

we are uh. . unionizing btw . just so you konw. we want 3% higher pay

-representative of the syndicate weapon's workers union

“Wait, you guys weren’t already unionized? Either way hell yeah, go for it.”

[ask-the-syndicate]

hey um what should we do about the fucking boat outside our post? its not like a shuttle or ship its literally just a boat

-anonymous syndicate operative

“…I’m sorry, the fucking WHAT”

[ask-the-syndicate]

Nyanyanya. Mrrp meow meow meow 🐈🐈 “death to nanotransen” mrrp meow nya Kwaii nya. =^u^= kill nya mrrpmeow.

"....I'm sorry, did that cat just say 'kill?' Who the hell taught the cat what Nanotrasen was too?"

[ask-the-syndicate]

cinder block

"I beg your pardon?"

[ask-the-syndicate]

this is the 6th outbreak this week and its only tuesday, by god start training your operatives basic hygiene so they dont all drop dead from fungal tuberculosis minutes after a mission because their suits were contaminated

“Hey don’t get angry at me! I’m just running this station! Take it up with whoever does recruitment to find better operatives!”

“Also what the hell are they doing, rolling around in fucking mushrooms??”

[interdyne]

They are coughing up fleshy lung bits.

They are contracting it because the delivery method is FOAM GRENADES.

and their suits get covered in it.

and they get into contact with it when they take em off.

[ask-the-syndicate]

“Why in the flying fuck are foam grenades being used for this? Just use some other kind of WMD already! And tell them to get their suits decontaminated after their missions! That’s basic training info!”