HAAAAALP!!!! I'm obsessed with fictional/cartoon men!!! What do I do?
My dear one, you seem a bit stressed about this situation. I imagine that you are buried deep within a closet, phone in hand, oogling bearded space wizards and imagining yourself taking one for a ride? Is this accurate?
Don’t answer that. I see all. I know you do.
This obsession you have is a good thing. Male fictional characters are usually always vastly superior than the real world options one would have. I’ve seen the holos from your world recently and am deeply disgusted by the krayt spit you must be subjected to from the males of your species. They seem rather low functioning. This occurs in a patriarchal society. Perhaps you should lead a revolt. Gather your sisters. Fight. Dominate. Tear them limb from limb and make them suffer the indignities they’ve afflicted over the centuries! ABOLISH THEM! DANCE IN THEIR ASHES! BREAK THEIR BACKS AND BATHE IN THEIR BLOOD!!
*cough* Sorry. That’s advice for another time.
With the state of affairs in your world, an escape from these vile creatures and horrible news would be welcomed. You deserve these things. Treat yourself, even if it means staring obsessively at things that aren’t real.
So go, fill your databanks with all of the cartoon characters you love. Watch your holodramas and read your fictional tales. My collection of Imperial and First Order filth may rival your own. Perhaps we can share?













