Nobody messes with you Boss!!

Felix Millstone, at your service!

[askfelixmillstone]

Hey quick question, does Max wear glasses ever? Because if he does, I have some bad news :/

[askfelixmillstone]

I've been keeping quiet lately, keeping my head down and trying my best to stay out of trouble with the Boss because she's been suuuuuper mad at me lately.

"But Felix, you're so great and awesome and also handsome and strong, why is she mad at you??"

Well, dear reader! Turns out that the box in her room? Full of random bits of armour and stuff? Yeah that isn't a spares and repairs box. They're her "personal possessions". But how was I supposed to know that?! It just looks like a bunch of junk! But yeah, apparently some of those suits of armour are one of a kind and irreplaceable, and therefore -shouldn't!- be used to fix the plumbing in the toilet when there's a leak because you accidentally shot it in the middle of the night because it scared you :/

[askphineaswelles]

Then the other day I was telling Gladys oh hold oh hiram i said shut up it's dictating god damn it hiram hiram are you there no you fucking imbecile mister who sand jar? snack jar Sanjar whatever can you please put Hiram back on. Oh uh Hiram is my cousin. Yes. Absolutely. I will. Thank you and have a lovely evening. Hiram you insipid lawdamned fool your mind has gone lukewarm pudding soft in that tower of yours. Why in the blazes are you not using a more secure line not one some random fool could tap into? No it's nothing on my end, it's clearly yours! Excuse me? Hello! Did he fucking hang up on me! Bubbles stay out of my Tileritos is this thing still recording oh fuck me running backwards

[askfelixmillstone]

Wow Phin, I didn't know you and Hiram were related!! I promise I'm taking extra good care of him, so you've got nothing to worry about!

Also you should see about changing your service provider, they're posting transcripts of your calls online :/

[askfelixmillstone]

You know, even with all the times he's threatened it, I never actually thought Max would leave me behind. But here I am, just a boy sat on the ground, handcuffed to a post, watching his ship fly away into the distance. I wonder how long it'll take the Boss to realise I'm gone. It shouldn't be too long, right guys? Hopefully it'll be long enough for me to work my way outta these cuffs though.

[askfelixmillstone]

Felix, what's "candice"? I keep seeing it.

Is this what having power feels like? Is this the feeling Rockwell spends so much time chasing after? The feeling of holding someone's world in your hands, where a simple phrase could make or break everything they know? Oh Hiram, my sweet, surprisingly innocent Hiram. You came to the wrong person for help >:)

CANDICE D*CK FIT IN YOUR MOUTH?!?!?!?

[n0tzat0ichi]

I-

I need a drink.

[mediocre-life-span]

Well why don't you try ligma?

[n0tzat0ichi]

Ligma? If this is like Candice, I swear to Law......

[mediocre-life-span]

@askfelixmillstone you wanna do the honours?

[askfelixmillstone]

@asktheinformationbroker

LIGMA BALLS. As a follow up, have you ever noticed that the air round Devil's Peak smells like Updog?

@mediocre-life-span you line em up, I'll knock em down!

[n0tzat0ichi]

..... I don't know how I put up with you.

[mediocre-life-span]

Yeah Joe got tired of it too...

[n0tzat0ichi]

Law have mercy, I'm going to regret this....

Who is Joe?

[mediocre-life-span]

JOE MAMA

[n0tzat0ichi]

I hate you all.

[askfelixmillstone]

😘

[askfelixmillstone]

Felix, what's "candice"? I keep seeing it.

Is this what having power feels like? Is this the feeling Rockwell spends so much time chasing after? The feeling of holding someone's world in your hands, where a simple phrase could make or break everything they know? Oh Hiram, my sweet, surprisingly innocent Hiram. You came to the wrong person for help >:)

CANDICE D*CK FIT IN YOUR MOUTH?!?!?!?

[n0tzat0ichi]

I-

I need a drink.

[mediocre-life-span]

Well why don't you try ligma?

[n0tzat0ichi]

Ligma? If this is like Candice, I swear to Law......

[mediocre-life-span]

@askfelixmillstone you wanna do the honours?

[askfelixmillstone]

@asktheinformationbroker

LIGMA BALLS. As a follow up, have you ever noticed that the air round Devil's Peak smells like Updog?

@mediocre-life-span you line em up, I'll knock em down!

[askfelixmillstone]

Felix, what's "candice"? I keep seeing it.

Is this what having power feels like? Is this the feeling Rockwell spends so much time chasing after? The feeling of holding someone's world in your hands, where a simple phrase could make or break everything they know? Oh Hiram, my sweet, surprisingly innocent Hiram. You came to the wrong person for help >:)

CANDICE D*CK FIT IN YOUR MOUTH?!?!?!?

[askphineaswelles]

The Captain always says 'nice' when I something is at 69 percent.

I mean, I suppose it is nice depending on what it is. 69 percent fuel isn't good.

[askfelixmillstone]

Nice.

[askfelixmillstone]

I can't talk right now, I'm doing hot girl shit

[askfelixmillstone]

So I've been "thinking".

If the Captain is from Earth

And we're all from Halcyon, a colony on alien worlds

And we were all born here

Would that make us aliens to the Captain and them an alien to us??

[askphineaswelles]

Technically all humans are alien to Halcyon since our species is not native. But you're not far off.

[askparvatiholcomb]

Are you saying...that we’re aliens?

[askfelixmillstone]

I think so! Wonder what cool alien powers we have!!

[askfelixmillstone]

So I've been "thinking".

If the Captain is from Earth

And we're all from Halcyon, a colony on alien worlds

And we were all born here

Would that make us aliens to the Captain and them an alien to us??

[askphineaswelles]

Technically all humans are alien to Halcyon since our species is not native. But you're not far off.

[askfelixmillstone]

That's closer to the mark than I usually am! I can live with that

[askfelixmillstone]

So I've been "thinking".

If the Captain is from Earth

And we're all from Halcyon, a colony on alien worlds

And we were all born here

Would that make us aliens to the Captain and them an alien to us??

[askphineaswelles]

People always go on about words they hate. What about words you like? I’m rather fond of the words persnickety, lollygag, discombobulate, and propoxyphene napsylate. 

[askfelixmillstone]

I like the word Yeet, I think that’s a cool word. What does persn-, parsni-, pers- whatever mean?

[fandomanxiety-fa]

@askfelixmillstone per-what, sweetie? Try saying it again. 🙂🤔

[askfelixmillstone]

Parsnipickerty. Final answer

Still don’t know what it means though :/

[askphineaswelles]

Persnickety

placing too much emphasis on trivial or minor details; fussy

Yeet? I’m not familiar with that one.

[askfelixmillstone]

Max is very parsnips, isn’t he?

Yeet? It’s when you take something and throw it really hard, preferably while yelling “YEET” at the top of your lungs :D like a grenade, or when you launched the Captain at the Emerald Vale. That would’ve been the perfect opportunity to yell yeet

[n0tzat0ichi]

Honestly, if he yelled yeet more, it would make him way more bearable.

[askfelixmillstone]

You’re right and you should say it.

He would be WAY more fun if he yelled yeet all the time. I might go round and spend a little time trying to convince him that yeet is the way forward

[n0tzat0ichi]

I guess if it makes you happy, Felix, I’ll start saying it.

And I will join you. He needs to learn how to be more fun. His old man side shows way too much currently.

[askphineaswelles]

I WILL YEET BOTH OF YOU INTO THE FURNACE.

[n0tzat0ichi]

And lose your best source of info? I doubt it,

Old man.

[askphineaswelles]

You think you’re my only source. Huh. You don’t know anything at all, do you. And yes, I am old. If you are fortunate, someday you will be old.

[n0tzat0ichi]

Maybe not your only, but I am definitely your best source. I’d be willing to bet money you won’t find an info broker better than me.

And if it means I turn out like you, I hope to Law I die before I turn 30 or 40.

[askphineaswelles]

I could find one that is less of a hullhead who is too busy fawning over his equally idiot boyfriend. And I’m sure if you keep pissing off Nyoka she can arrange an accident for you. Maybe just let the canids onto your doorstep and ‘forgetting’ to close the doors. What does that mean, turn out like me? Intelligent, dashing, cultured? You insult yourself, Hiram.

[askfelixmillstone]

Damn, all this over the word yeet?

[askphineaswelles]

People always go on about words they hate. What about words you like? I’m rather fond of the words persnickety, lollygag, discombobulate, and propoxyphene napsylate. 

[askfelixmillstone]

I like the word Yeet, I think that’s a cool word. What does persn-, parsni-, pers- whatever mean?

[fandomanxiety-fa]

@askfelixmillstone per-what, sweetie? Try saying it again. 🙂🤔

[askfelixmillstone]

Parsnipickerty. Final answer

Still don’t know what it means though :/

[askphineaswelles]

Persnickety

placing too much emphasis on trivial or minor details; fussy

Yeet? I’m not familiar with that one.

[askfelixmillstone]

Max is very parsnips, isn’t he?

Yeet? It’s when you take something and throw it really hard, preferably while yelling “YEET” at the top of your lungs :D like a grenade, or when you launched the Captain at the Emerald Vale. That would’ve been the perfect opportunity to yell yeet

[askphineaswelles]

Felix. Son. Please. Stop ruining the English language.

[askfelixmillstone]

Eye dew watt eye want!!

[askphineaswelles]

People always go on about words they hate. What about words you like? I’m rather fond of the words persnickety, lollygag, discombobulate, and propoxyphene napsylate. 

[askfelixmillstone]

I like the word Yeet, I think that’s a cool word. What does persn-, parsni-, pers- whatever mean?

[fandomanxiety-fa]

@askfelixmillstone per-what, sweetie? Try saying it again. 🙂🤔

[askfelixmillstone]

Parsnipickerty. Final answer

Still don’t know what it means though :/

[askphineaswelles]

Persnickety

placing too much emphasis on trivial or minor details; fussy

Yeet? I’m not familiar with that one.

[askfelixmillstone]

Max is very parsnips, isn’t he?

Yeet? It’s when you take something and throw it really hard, preferably while yelling “YEET” at the top of your lungs :D like a grenade, or when you launched the Captain at the Emerald Vale. That would’ve been the perfect opportunity to yell yeet

[n0tzat0ichi]

Honestly, if he yelled yeet more, it would make him way more bearable.

[askfelixmillstone]

You're right and you should say it.

He would be WAY more fun if he yelled yeet all the time. I might go round and spend a little time trying to convince him that yeet is the way forward

[askphineaswelles]

People always go on about words they hate. What about words you like? I’m rather fond of the words persnickety, lollygag, discombobulate, and propoxyphene napsylate. 

[askfelixmillstone]

I like the word Yeet, I think that’s a cool word. What does persn-, parsni-, pers- whatever mean?

[fandomanxiety-fa]

@askfelixmillstone per-what, sweetie? Try saying it again. 🙂🤔

[askfelixmillstone]

Parsnipickerty. Final answer

Still don’t know what it means though :/

[askphineaswelles]

Persnickety

placing too much emphasis on trivial or minor details; fussy

Yeet? I’m not familiar with that one.

[askfelixmillstone]

Max is very parsnips, isn't he?

Yeet? It's when you take something and throw it really hard, preferably while yelling "YEET" at the top of your lungs :D like a grenade, or when you launched the Captain at the Emerald Vale. That would've been the perfect opportunity to yell yeet

[askfelixmillstone]

Remember kids, if the fruit looks unusually perfect, it's probably wax

Don't ask how I know that