Be Very Very Afraid

Dr AJ Crowley | They/Them ONLY | Art History Professor at St Beryl's University | Will answer questions about art and art history | May answer personal questions if I'm in the right mood

[askprofessorcrowley]

((Hi everyone! Mod here!!!! Welcome to my first ever ask blog, I’m so excited to start running this thing!!!! This ask blog is based off of a professors AU I created, and although it will be following some major plot points of the fic I’m writing for it, you don’t actually need to read the fic to interact with this blog.

If you do want to read it though, the fic is here! The fic used to be 18+, but I have decreased the rating to be inclusive to younger folks in the fandom. Again, you don’t need any prior knowledge of this fic to ask questions on this blog!

All you need to know is that in this human professors AU, Dr Crowley is a painter and an art history professor, they are nonbinary and only use they/them pronouns, and they have a very close friendship with Dr Zira Fell, a religion professor, which is quickly turning into a slow-burn pining fest, much to everyone’s frustration. Oh yeah, and there's NO COVID!

You can ask Dr Crowley whatever questions you want, from any perspective, including as one of their students! And don’t worry, this blog will include PLENTY of Zira namedrops and gushfests in the near future.

Happy asking!))

[askprofessorcrowley]

Hi folks, been a while.

Quick life update, Dr Fell and I got married this summer. Just thought you would be interested to know all of you were right all along. Don't make a big deal out of it or I'll curse you.

((Sorry I abandoned this ask blog lol! I finally finished the fic this blog was based on last week. If you read it to the end thanks for sticking around! I come back to this blog a lot to remember how fun it was. Maybe I'll make a new Crowley blog someday. Thanks for having fun with me! Love, mod 💛))

[askprofessorcrowley]

good morning dr crowley!!! im taking a (for funsies, im a stem major) art class but whenever i use charcoal the little powder it creates makes my ADD brain do scared backflips. how do i avoid perishment

Don't worry about perfection. Let the dust do its thing. Let it build up and smudge and make it part of your style. OR, use some chamois cloth to blend your art and catch some of that pesky dust. You can find it at most arts and crafts stores, or on Amazon.

[bartolome-esteban-murillo]

St. Justina and St. Rufina, 1675, Bartolome Esteban Murillo

Medium: oil,canvas

[askprofessorcrowley]

I’m long overdue on pranking Dr Hastur. This time, I’m crowdsourcing suggestions on how to inconvenience an obnoxious coworker. Give me your best ideas and don’t disappoint me.

[askprofessorcrowley]

((@thesaltofcarthage since this is an rp blog for a British character, the answer is "sweet things Americans call cookies" lmao))

[askprofessorcrowley]

Hmmm. It turns out that stale biscuits at 1:30 in the morning are good, actually.

[prokopetz]

Reading about Ancient Greece is is like listening to a professor go “actually, [fucked up thing you may have heard] was not broadly true of Classical Greek society, and the inhabitants of most city-states would have found the idea disturbing”, and then a voice from the back of the room calls out “except for Athens!”, and the professor just sighs and is like “yes, thank you, Timmy… except for Athens”.

[cheesetheory]

“Ancient Greece was very fucked up” factoid actually just statistical error. Average ancient Greek person only somewhat fucked up. Athens Georgicles, who lived in Athens & was unfathomably fucked up, was an outlier and should not have been counted.

[askprofessorcrowley]

Have you and Dr. Fell ever watched a horror film together?

Nope, never. I don’t think he likes horror. He doesn’t seem like the type. He’s too... you know. Wholesome.

[askprofessorcrowley]

Ever seen Doctor Sleep? I watched it with my dad last week and it was really good

Don’t think so. I watched this Chinese thriller movie in the Wuxia genre a few months back called Legend of the Mountain though, and it was fantastic. Bit long and slow in parts, but totally worth it for the ending. Anyway, I’ll take a look at Doctor Sleep.

[askprofessorcrowley]

All this talk of horror films and yet I’ve nobody to watch them with. My life is a Shakespearian tragedy.

[askprofessorcrowley]

Do you know that feeling when you stumble over a good horro movie and its just...you are so upsett but in the best way cause it did what it was supposed to do

The Shining did that for me, it was one of the first horror movies that really gave me that feeling. Hereditary is another one of those films, it’s one of the more recent ones I’ve really enjoyed.

[askprofessorcrowley]

honestly at this point I’m kind of immune to people trying to intimidate me. Like I’m already scared 24/7, what are you even going to do

If intimidation doesn’t work, threats might. And I like to follow through on my threats.

[askprofessorcrowley]

*When u live in country with a language that has no they* Welp time to not referr to me at all everybody.

Make up your own word and be obnoxious about it until everyone gets used to it. That’s the beauty of neopronouns, they can exist in any language. Stick it to the system. Be aggressively neutral. Fuck ‘em.

[askprofessorcrowley]

Frog portraits > human portraits

----

You are correct.

[askprofessorcrowley]

Would you rather eat cold food hot or hot food cold?

I’d rather eat hot food cold. Hot food doesn’t melt when cold.

[askprofessorcrowley]

Hey hey hey do you like horror as a genre?

I’m VERY into horror. It’s a great genre. I of course like the well-made ones, but I also really like the cheesy, low-budget, badly-made ones that I can make fun of.