ellievsbear
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
sheepfilms
Not today Justin
Sade Olutola
Jules of Nature
One Nice Bug Per Day
Peter Solarz
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Sweet Seals For You, Always
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Origami Around
DEAR READER
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we're not kids anymore.
todays bird
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@asksebastians
i am very very bored-someone please entertain me with stories of your wild plans for the weekend. me? i’m working on a super sexy essay on tudor women. please tell me someone has a more exciting life than me.
I just have a lot of homework as well. There are rumors of some football/Cheerio related party or something, though.
doesn’t that just sound lovely and trashy. i take it you didn’t make it onto the invite list?
i am very very bored-someone please entertain me with stories of your wild plans for the weekend. me? i’m working on a super sexy essay on tudor women. please tell me someone has a more exciting life than me.
asksebastians:
asksebastians:
look, little miss homophobe, i guaranteee that if i had the choice, i would not be stuck here. but here i am, and since you seem to be so disgusted by other people’s sexual encounters, i’m definitely not going to keep it to myself. and there’s nothing you can do about it.
Little Miss Homophobe? Wow, what an insult. We don’t need to hear about it, but I am intrigued. How exactly do you give back alley blowjobs with those horse teeth? I’m sure the Craigslist bears have some complaints, no?
kind of weird how invested you are in my sex life. am i the first gay person you’ve talked to or something? i haven’t had any complaints about the teeth yet, but i’m sure many of your hookups are kinda disturbed by the weird lesbian tendencies that all cheerleaders seem to have.
god, this place is a drag. i’m pretty sure there’s more cows than people here. someone, please make my day and tell me there’s a gay bar here, or at least somewhere to get a drink?
In Lima? Not likely.
surely there’s got to be some disgusting corner of the town where the gays hang out, and the straight people go in secret. i’m sure you’d be welcome there, twinkletoes
god, this place is a drag. i’m pretty sure there’s more cows than people here. someone, please make my day and tell me there’s a gay bar here, or at least somewhere to get a drink?
asksebastians:
god, this place is a drag. i’m pretty sure there’s more cows than people here. someone, please make my day and tell me there’s a gay bar here, or at least somewhere to get a drink?
You people are really taking over, huh? I know a pasty face twink who could keep you company for the evening. But just a tip, keep it to yourself. We don’t all want to hear about your lifestyle. We’re in Ohio if you didn’t know.
look, little miss homophobe, i guaranteee that if i had the choice, i would not be stuck here. but here i am, and since you seem to be so disgusted by other people’s sexual encounters, i’m definitely not going to keep it to myself. and there’s nothing you can do about it.
god, this place is a drag. i’m pretty sure there’s more cows than people here. someone, please make my day and tell me there’s a gay bar here, or at least somewhere to get a drink?
asksebastians:
i’m just being honest, sweetheart. you’re right, i don’t know you, but i feel i know everything i need to know about you from our limited interaction. you’re whiny, sensitive and insufferable.
I’m sorry, but from our limited reaction you haven’t learned anything, therefore you have no honest leg to stand on. I was literally going to compliment you and your Warblers until you were so rude. You have no evidence of me being any of those things.
our limited interaction is all the evidence i need. if you represent the best of show choir at your public school, i wouldn’t even bother entering any sort of competition.
asksebastians:
hey, i was only giving you some constructive criticism. maybe if you took it, you wouldn’t consider helpful comments as a harsh attack.
Maybe if you left out words like “psychotic” and were actually giving constructive criticism, I would take it as such. You’re just being mean for the sake of being mean. You don’t even know me.
i’m just being honest, sweetheart. you’re right, i don’t know you, but i feel i know everything i need to know about you from our limited interaction. you’re whiny, sensitive and insufferable.
asksebastians:
hello Rachel, Rachel Berry. my name is Sebastian. i am in fact a warbler, and you are very overconfident. maybe if you spent less time stroking your ego and more time trying not to dress like a psychotic toddler you wouldn’t come across so insufferable.
Jeez, and here I was about to give you a compliment. Do you usually harshly attack people you don’t know so early on?
hey, i was only giving you some constructive criticism. maybe if you took it, you wouldn’t consider helpful comments as a harsh attack.
Happy New Year, well not actual new year, happy new school year! If you see a white shoe, please come and find me, I can’t remember when I lost it, but I really need it back for Cheerios practice.
how do you lose a shoe?
What current trend do you hope will go on for a long time?
lgbt acceptance. i’ve lived in dubai. it’s hell. i’m just glad i was able to get out of there. i know not everyone can.
do you believe in love?
no. next.
i don’t see how anyone can. it just doesn’t exist. better to accept that than to chase some pipe dream of love that will inevitably end in pain and alcoholism.
asksebastians :
my name’s Sebastian, darling, and i’m better than you. and i don’t just consider you mediocre. you know, deep down, that you, and your quaint little public school, are so very mediocre.
Well, Sebastian, some of us don’t have a rich mommy and daddy to pay our way through private school. You are privileged, not superior.
no, i’m privileged and superior. besides, my grandparents pay my tuition, so jokes on you.
asksebastians :
wow public school sounds like hell. i’m so grateful i don’t have to be around people like you on the daily. i’d probably be forced to deport myself to get away from the mediocrity.
And who the hell are you? Clearly you don’t go to McKinley if you think I’m what’s considered mediocre.
my name’s Sebastian, darling, and i’m better than you. and i don’t just consider you mediocre. you know, deep down, that you, and your quaint little public school, are so very mediocre.
My math teacher still wrote me up for being late to class, even when I explained that the only reason I was late was because I just spent twenty minutes trying to get the smell of spoiled milk from the dumpster out of my Doc Martens… As if I actually missed anything anyways. He couldn’t sting a coherent sentence together if it killed him.
wow public school sounds like hell. i’m so grateful i don’t have to be around people like you on the daily. i’d probably be forced to deport myself to get away from the mediocrity.
What was your favorite show as a kid?
any kind of cartoon in french. it was my first language, so when i was a kid, the jokes always made more sense in french. also, french tv is just generally better than american.
What are five of your biggest turn ons and biggest turn offs?
this is a very invasive question. i like it. you know, you’ll have to ask me off anonymous if you’re looking for anything from me.
turn ons: shorter boys, bitchy attitudes, dark hair, long legs, freckles
turn offs: girls, romance, overly touchy feely people, talking about emotions, stupidity
