Ask Swamp Hat

//Adult situations and scenarios. Ask with caution. View at own cost.// Icon done by @hmmartz

[comedy-on-the-side]

sorry

I left to go get milk, took me a while

[askswamphat]

“It’s nice to see you back, old friend. Took you long enough to get milk, the gumbo’s always on if you ever want to visit the swamp and have a bowl or two.” 

[comedy-on-the-side]

that sounds good, I'm starving, I've been lost and walking cause my shoes ran out of gas

[askswamphat]

Swampy can’t help but cock his head to the side, a hand lifting up and scratching the back of his neck. He stays this way for a good, long moment, before looking down at Comedy’s shoes. He moves to even get onto all fours, practically on his belly, getting a closer look of his shoes, before standing back up onto his feet again. He claps a hand against Comedy’s shoulder before shaking his head. “...I don’t get it. Your shoes have always had gas in them?!?! What kind of funky voodoo is that mess?! But if you’re starving, get your ass over here, it’s been too damn long!”

[comedy-on-the-side]

[has on Shadow the Hedgehog cheater shoes] what do you mean> the gas tank is in there somewhere... I think [shrugs] but yes, food sounds good, I brought the milk by the way

[askswamphat]

He didn’t know what this Shadow the Hedgehog was, but he chuckles as Comedy mentions he brought the milk. “Did I ask you to pick up milk? I don’t remember. I have been busy making all kinds of good luck charms, potions and everything else to fight this Cabana virus that’s going around. If they would enlist me, they wouldn’t have to have shots. But yes, let me feed you...” He smirks, tail swishing behind him as he leads him into his shack.

[comedy-on-the-side]

so- y-you need the milk though, right? [sweating]

[askswamphat]

He can’t help but let out a genuine chuckle, looking down at his dear friend and purring. “I can always use more milk for the dishes I make and also as an ingredient to purify charms-to make good gris gris. So no worries, the milk is appreciated.”

[comedy-on-the-side]

sorry

I left to go get milk, took me a while

[askswamphat]

“It’s nice to see you back, old friend. Took you long enough to get milk, the gumbo’s always on if you ever want to visit the swamp and have a bowl or two.” 

[comedy-on-the-side]

that sounds good, I'm starving, I've been lost and walking cause my shoes ran out of gas

[askswamphat]

Swampy can’t help but cock his head to the side, a hand lifting up and scratching the back of his neck. He stays this way for a good, long moment, before looking down at Comedy’s shoes. He moves to even get onto all fours, practically on his belly, getting a closer look of his shoes, before standing back up onto his feet again. He claps a hand against Comedy’s shoulder before shaking his head. “...I don’t get it. Your shoes have always had gas in them?!?! What kind of funky voodoo is that mess?! But if you’re starving, get your ass over here, it’s been too damn long!”

[comedy-on-the-side]

[has on Shadow the Hedgehog cheater shoes] what do you mean> the gas tank is in there somewhere... I think [shrugs] but yes, food sounds good, I brought the milk by the way

[askswamphat]

He didn’t know what this Shadow the Hedgehog was, but he chuckles as Comedy mentions he brought the milk. “Did I ask you to pick up milk? I don’t remember. I have been busy making all kinds of good luck charms, potions and everything else to fight this Cabana virus that’s going around. If they would enlist me, they wouldn’t have to have shots. But yes, let me feed you...” He smirks, tail swishing behind him as he leads him into his shack.

[comedy-on-the-side]

sorry

I left to go get milk, took me a while

[askswamphat]

“It’s nice to see you back, old friend. Took you long enough to get milk, the gumbo’s always on if you ever want to visit the swamp and have a bowl or two.” 

[comedy-on-the-side]

that sounds good, I'm starving, I've been lost and walking cause my shoes ran out of gas

[askswamphat]

Swampy can’t help but cock his head to the side, a hand lifting up and scratching the back of his neck. He stays this way for a good, long moment, before looking down at Comedy’s shoes. He moves to even get onto all fours, practically on his belly, getting a closer look of his shoes, before standing back up onto his feet again. He claps a hand against Comedy’s shoulder before shaking his head. “...I don’t get it. Your shoes have always had gas in them?!?! What kind of funky voodoo is that mess?! But if you’re starving, get your ass over here, it’s been too damn long!”

[comedy-on-the-side]

sorry

I left to go get milk, took me a while

[askswamphat]

“It’s nice to see you back, old friend. Took you long enough to get milk, the gumbo’s always on if you ever want to visit the swamp and have a bowl or two.” 

[askswamphat]

Even though this year is different...

“Yes, even us who live in the swamp know about this virus mess. Still, I won’t let something like that ruin my festivities. I have the jambalaya just about finished. And a friend of mine delivered a King Cake to my door. I will be having my own Mardi Gras celebration; laissez le bon temps rouler!

[askswamphat]

I'm once again here to wish you a happy Birthday, Swamp Hat.

“And here I thought everyone forgot my birthday! Thank you, gray faced individual. I have been secretly stuffing myself full of cake and enjoying how nice and warm the swamp has been lately.”

@askswamphat

[askswamphat]

Hi, Swamp Hat, how've you been? Anything interesting that you've been up to lately?

@askswamphat

“I have been managing as well as everyone else could. The swamp has been rather quiet since all this ‘quarantine’ has started to happen, but I don’t mind it at all. I can’t get sick from that virus, so it’s just been a damn shame to watch so many people suffer from it. If only they would come to me for my services, maybe I could give them a nice tonic to make that nasty virus go away. But I suppose the most interesting thing I have done is I have started to get to work on making an airboat for myself.”

[askswamphat]

I’ve sent a crocodile to an alligator’s swamp.

Have fun.

@askswamphat​

He was busy having a nice, relaxing time to himself, laying upon his rock, feet and tail idly swaying in the water below. He sits up though as he senses another cold blooded creature within his waters. Growling, he moves quietly down into the water, dipping below and swimming towards the source. Unwanted predators could disturb the perfect ecosystem he’s made and that was unacceptable. 

[askcomedyhat]

Swamp Hat comes strolling to Comedy's club, gaining access with his special members VIP card, and smirks as he sees Comedy up ahead. "It's been too damn long, so I figured I would come and bring you a nice, big ol' pot of gumbo and some beignets to finish off with!" He stands there with a big, toothy grin on his face, glad to see Comedy once again.

it’s always good to have a friend over 

[askswamphat]

“Comedy really enjoyed the gumbo and beignets!” 

[tikkety-tok]

Did she just tell an alligator what to do? 😳

[muntndewrocks]

A gator

[happy-little-elf]

🔥 Coming across a large gator

(source)

[askswamphat]

I promise I am not dead

“I have just been doing my part in staying safe myself. And trying to keep my mun in good mental health and everything. I will have try to become more active soon. I hope everyone is doing well and keeping safe themselves.”

[downydig]

[hmmartz-deactivated20210312]

@askswamphat I highly doubt I’m wrong

[askswamphat]

Doesn’t understand what this is, cocking his head. But chuckles a bit, a smirk full of teeth. “I cannot confirm nor deny.”

[askswamphat]

(Word from the Mod/Mun)

(I am so sorry to keep putting Swampy’s blog on hold, but life issues have come up. My 90 year old grandma is (we are pretty certain according to her regular doc and test results) is in Stage 4 Congestive Heart Failure. And we will find out later today just how much longer she has to live. It may be instructed by the heart doctor that a family member should live with her and care for her until she passes (I have nominated myself to do so) or may end up in a care facility. If she doesn’t have long, there are still a lot of affairs to take care of regarding her house and everything, including letting the rest of the family know and then...overcoming what happens when she passes. Please bare with me as I am unsure how this may affect me. So far I was sad and now I just hate it and what it’s doing to my stress. Ever since I lost my dad to suicide, death is just...I fear it, I don’t like it, and it’s always a subject that has me wanting to hurl my guts out. And to someone with chronic IBS-doesn’t matter if you are thinking about it-just fucks you up anyways. So I will update everyone later when I have more information, but please don’t hold it against me if I don’t feel like posting or chatting or anything for a while. It’s not that I don’t love you guys or Swampy-just I need a little time to process and especially help my own mother once her only living parental dies. Thank you so much for understanding. Of course, please keep things coming in-just at Swampy and I will get to them eventually. Any thoughts or prayers or kind words are also appreciated. Thanks again for understanding and hope you all remain well).

[askswamphat]

I've only known Swamp Hat for about 5 minutes, but if anything happen to him I would kill everyone in this room and then m y s e l f. He's babey, I love him.

“I don’t know if I approve of anything ever coming to that, or much less you ever bringing harm to yourself anon. But I hear you message loud and clear, and I appreciate the love. But why does everyone call me baby? I do not get it. I am old enough to be everyone’s great, great, great, great, great grandpa twice removed. So, I am far from baby…”

Sees mun looking at him, shaking her head. “…..what!??!? I am not a baby.”

[redeemed-au]

White: I too have been called baby- Vin says its like saying someone is adorable, innocent, and needs to be protected and loved and cherished. Human lingo confuses me greatly…

@askswamphat

[askswamphat]

“Ah. It is noted then. I suppose then I will accept being called baby.”

@redeemed-au

[askswamphat]

I know I have been pretty much away for a long time

“But much like everyone else, I have been stuck on a quarantine. It’s not so bad. The swamp has been quiet and I have been focusing all my time on fixing up the shack and growing new things in the swamp. Been soaking in the rays, spending time soaking in the water-yes, there may be a virus going around but it’s not going to kick my ass.”

(I hope all my followers have been staying safe.)