Diaries of a Mirror

Always Reflecting, Rarely seen

[asmatanveerali]

21st September 2025

Brampton

All my life, I have watched how society celebrates intelligence. From the time we are children, we are given grades, scores, and labels that are supposed to determine our potential. IQ - the Intelligence Quotient - has always been treated as the golden standard of success. It measures how quickly we can solve problems, how well we can remember information, how sharp our logic is. The narrative was set to believe that intelligence alone was the foundation of success. We were led to believe that intelligence alone was the foundation of success. And yes, IQ is important. It can open doors, it can help us achieve academically, and it can set us up in careers that demand intellect and skill.

But as I have walked through my own journey, I have realised something powerful, IQ alone is not enough. Being “smart” in the traditional sense doesn’t teach us how to calm our hearts when life feels heavy, or how to stay grounded when the world is shaking. It doesn’t show us how to forgive, how to inspire, or how to truly connect with others. That’s where EQ - Emotional Intelligence - steps in.

EQ is not about grades or certificates, it is about wisdom of the heart. It’s the ability to recognize your own emotions and not let them control you. It’s the courage to manage your reactions in moments of anger or stress. It’s empathy, the simple but powerful act of understanding someone else’s pain or joy. It’s the way we build relationships, nurture trust, and uplift those around us.

The older I get, the more I see how EQ often matters more than IQ. At workplace, in friendships, in family life, what people remember is not how fast you solved a problem, but how you made them feel. A leader with EQ can move hearts and bring people together, while a leader with only intellect may struggle to inspire. A parent with EQ teaches more than lessons, they teach compassion, patience, and resilience. Even in the hardest times of life, it’s EQ that helps us endure, reminding us to breathe, to rise again, and to hold on to kindness when it would be easier to let bitterness win.

Still, it’s not about choosing between one or the other. Life is not EQ versus IQ. It’s EQ and IQ. Both walk hand in hand. The most extraordinary people I know combine their intellect with empathy, their knowledge with compassion. IQ may get you opportunities, but EQ helps you keep them. IQ can win debates, but EQ wins trust. IQ might create inventions, but EQ ensures they serve humanity. Together, they create a balance that transforms not just careers, but lives.

So if you have ever felt “not smart enough” because the numbers didn’t reflect your potential, please remember this, your heart, your resilience, your ability to love, forgive, and connect, these are forms of intelligence too. And if you are blessed with a sharp mind, let your emotional wisdom guide it, so that your brilliance doesn’t only shine for yourself, but lights the way for others.

At the end of the day, success is not defined solely by the sharpness of your mind, but also by the openness of your heart. The mind equips us with ability, but the heart reminds us of our humanity. When we choose to nurture both, we don’t just achieve success, we create purpose, we leave a lasting impact, and we grow into something far greater than what numbers alone can reflect.

[asmatanveerali]

2nd September 2025

10:56pm

Brampton

Life has a way of testing the balance between strength and softness.

Too often, people confuse kindness with weakness, empathy with naivety. They may take your giving nature for granted, assuming you will always be available, always forgiving, always ready to carry more than your share. And if you are not careful, this can drain you, leaving you feeling invisible and unappreciated.

But the answer is not to abandon your kindness. The answer is to remember that boundaries and compassion are not opposites, they are companions. Boundaries are the walls that protect your garden and kindness is the fragrance that still flows beyond those walls. You can be firm without being cruel. You can walk away without becoming bitter. You can say “no” without losing your humanity.

When you guard your worth, you teach others how to honor it. When you hold on to empathy, you remind yourself that your heart is not defined by what others do to you, but by who you choose to be. True strength is not about building strong impenetrable walls, it is about standing rooted in dignity, yet allowing love and compassion to flow freely.

So do not let the world’s ingratitude convince you to close off your heart. Stay soft, but not naïve. Stay kind, but not available to every demand. Stay empathetic, but never at the cost of your own peace. That is the delicate balance.. the art of being strong without losing your soul.

[asmatanveerali]

25th Aug 2025

Brampton - 9:52am

One of the biggest realisations I had in life is how we are both relevant and insignificant at the same time.

Relevant.. because our words, actions, and choices matter. To our families, to our friends, to the people we cross paths with every day, our presence can change everything. A smile can lift a stranger’s spirit. A word of encouragement can change someone’s direction. A small act of kindness can multiply further than we will ever know. In this human circle, we are relevant.

And yet when we measure our existence against the universe it feels like it is just very minute. Centuries pass, and history moves forward without pausing for our personal wins or struggles. This truth reminds us not to carry the weight of the world on our shoulders. It teaches us humility… that the world does not revolve around us and that’s perfectly okay.

When we live with this balance, life becomes lighter. We stop obsessing over being remembered forever, and instead focus on making a difference today. We stop trying to control everything, and instead learn to give our best to what is right in front of us.

So the next time you feel too small to matter remember your relevance in the lives you touch. And the next time you feel too self important remember your smallness in the large scale of time. Both truths keep us grounded, grateful, and free.

At the heart of it all, to be “relevantly irrelevant” is to live humbly yet purposefully. We may be small in the universe, but we are infinite in the moments we choose to make meaningful.

[asmatanveerali]

24th August 2025

Brampton

9:35pm

In a world that constantly urges us to speak louder, respond faster, and prove ourselves quicker, the art of slowing down, listening more and reacting less has almost become a forgotten virtue. Yet the truth is simple.. silence is not emptiness, and observation is not passivity. They are powerful tools that open doors to wisdom, self-control, and peace.

When you choose to listen more and speak less, you give yourself the chance to truly understand others. Conversations stop being battles for attention and instead become opportunities for genuine connection. You begin to notice not only what people are saying, but also what they leave unsaid.. the emotions beneath the words, the hesitations between sentences, the vulnerable truths hidden behind the tones. That kind of awareness is only possible when we quiet our urge to respond too quickly.

Likewise, when you decide to observe more and react less, life reveals its subtle nature. You start to see patterns, behaviors, and lessons that might otherwise slip past you in the rush of constant reaction. Observation gives you space to pause, to see clearly, and in that clarity lies the power to make better choices. Impulsive reactions often lead to regret, while thoughtful responses cultivate respect and stronger outcomes.

The hidden blessing is this practice not only makes you wiser, it also saves you from unnecessary troubles. Think of how many arguments, misunderstandings, and regrets could be avoided if we had paused before speaking, chosen silence over a heated word, or taken a moment to truly watch before assuming.

Choosing to listen and observe is not weakness.. it is strength.

So the next time you are tempted to speak too quickly or react too strongly, take a breath. Step back. Listen. Observe. In that stillness, you will find not only a deeper understanding of the world around you but also a calmer, wiser version of yourself within.

[asmatanveerali]

31st July 2025

12:45pm - Brampton, ON

I have been told I am overly focused on pleasing others, and that I take things to heart more than I should.

That I don’t call people out enough.

That I am always excessive with my “please,” “thank you,” and “I’m sorry.”

That I stay diplomatic even when others wouldn't.

And maybe they are right.

But here is something I have come to believe deeply:

We live in a world where criticism is constant. Where people are quick to speak, quick to judge, and even quicker to assume the worst. Everyone wants to be brutally honest as if harshness is a badge of courage.

But I have seen enough of that. And I don’t think the world needs more of it. It’s too harsh and hurtful.

I believe in the quiet strength of goodness.

In choosing kindness, even when it’s not returned.

In staying respectful, even when it’s easier to lash out.

In being soft, even when the world sees softness as weakness.

It’s not that I can’t be honest. I just believe honesty can be wrapped in grace.

It’s not that I don’t see what’s wrong. I just believe in correcting without crushing.

There’s enough noise. Enough anger. Enough people trying to win arguments.

I believe we can still choose goodness, not because we are weak, but because we know it’s the harder choice.

And I believe that in choosing goodness, we plant seeds of real, lasting change.

So no, I may not always “call people out.”

But I will always show up with intention, dignity, and light.

Because that’s the kind of difference I want to make.

[asmaali-officialblogs]

how can quarantine be used as a time for self love rather than complete isolation?

30th April 2020 - Between 11:30am-12:30pm

40 Tideland Drive

Brampton

Man is a social animal. This is a quote we live by. Human interactions, human touch and human involvement in our daily life keeps us going. The past few months of Quarantine has defied this whole style of living. We have slowed down in this fast paced world. We no longer are a part of a race. A race to please people, impress them, be conscious of their feelings. Yes, we still continue to be social animals where we need human interactions but at the same time we have seen that limiting our interactions with people has given us more time to self reflect and self improve. Self care is something that was always ignored. Before pleasing ourselves and listening to our inner soul we have always put people first and always considered their feelings rather than ours.

Sometimes Isolation is good. It gives us time to reflect on all the thoughts that have been ignored and probably should have been pondered upon. Give a chance to your inner voice and listen to it. Don’t let the commotion of the world take over your inner voice. Be quarantine or no quarantine people will always be around us. Sometimes loving us, Sometimes judging us. The best way to handle is listening to your inner self and following what the voice says. Quarantine has taught us a new way of living. It has open doors of self care, it has taught how we can put ourselves first. It is something we need to practice on a regular basis even after this period has ended.

[asmatanveerali]

Today is the day I started doing what I left behind ages ago. I was 20 when I last wrote down a journal. Today I am 42. Times have passed and how. Such beautiful and vivid memories of me writing (for me it was a window to express myself). I wish I continued but I stopped..

Today I wouldn’t say I stopped but I would say I paused before getting back to it again.

I am so excited yet nervous.