Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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YOU ARE THE REASON
izzy's playlists!
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let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
we're not kids anymore.
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I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
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Discipline & Focus
I’ve learned that no matter how much I love something I’m not always going to be motivated to do it.
Weather it’s a fitness program or a job there will be days where I just don’t want to do it.
I would always think because i lost the motivation with something that meant I wasn’t passionate about it but that’s not true. Nothing in life is perfect & there will be good days & bad days in all aspects…
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Let’s stay home
I remember when I didn’t have any responsibilities & the little ones I did have I really didn’t stress about. Weekends were for sleeping all day & partying all night.
Now that I’m in my 30s weekends are completely different. I find myself staying in a lot more & actually liking it. I’ll go out to dinner & drinks with friends on occasion or have a small get together at my house but I have…
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What’s best for me?
What’s best for me?
What’s best for me? This is the question I ask myself whenever making a decision. It’s not selfish to think like this & it’s still something i struggle with.
Trying to make everyone happy is impossible so why don’t we just keep it simple & make ourselves happy?
No matter decision I make someone will always have an opinion about it. I don’t know if it’s because people get too comfortable with me…
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The 4th trimester
I thought the 3rd trimester & labor & delivery where the worst part of becoming a parent. I kept hearing people tell me this is nothing compared to the 4th trimester. Yes there is a such thing & I’m in the trenches of it right now.
The first 3 months of a newborns life aka the 4th trimester is harder than being pregnant for 9 months & being in labor for over 30 hours.
First of all, I don’t know…
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Holy shit I’m a mom
Holy shit I’m a mom
I spent my whole pregnancy counting down to the due date. I counted by months, weeks & days all while making sure to tell the baby girl in my belly that she can come a week or 2 before the due date of December 7 or on the exact date. The idea of going past my due date was something I feared & didn’t think i could handle.
When my water broke on November 30th I was thrilled that we were on the same…
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Facts on facts on facts
Facts on facts on facts
I spent so much of my 20s worrying about what people thought of me, I look back now & wish i could go back to my 20 year old self to shake some sense into her.
I worried about people judging me for everything. What kind of job I had, why I wasn’t married yet even though being in a relationship for a decade, my looks, what I chose to eat.
Now that I’m older & a little bit wiser I realize what a…
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Home stretch
Today is the officially start of my third trimester on this pregnancy journey. So far it has gone really fast but i feel like that’s going to change as the weeks go on.
All the decisions I need to make that I thought I had plenty of time to think about are now at the point of deciding on a final decision.
The hardest decision is childcare. We aren’t going to have grandparents that are retired yet…
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Keeping it real with myself
Keeping it real with myself
Being honest with myself and coming to terms with my flaws is something I’ve been working on lately.
I used to sugar coat everything & that got me nowhere. Holding myself accountable for my actions only helps me to improve & grow.
One of my pet peeves would be people especially people close to me sugar coated things instead of just keeping it real.
If I expect that from other people I need to…
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Keeping it cool... kinda
Keeping it cool… kinda
So this week I have put pretty much everyone i know on a mission to figure out how I can manage my stress in a healthy way.
Since I’m pregnant I’m very limited to the amount of things I can do. I’m also twice as crazy as I usually am.
On normal circumstances when I’m stressed or having a bad day at work I would go home and crack open a bottle of wine. I really miss wine.
At first I thought…
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Gender Reveal Parties
I didn’t care if we had a gender reveal party or not but my mother in law was obsessed with planning one. As soon as she found out about the baby she started giving her ideas for a party.
We are fortunate enough to have both parents who are not only excited about there first grandchild but are willing to host different parties celebrating this baby.
Since we were scheduled for our anatomy…
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Boundaries at work are a must
Boundaries at work are a must
My boss likes to do this thing where I don’t hear from him all day and then a half hour after the office closes he sends a text with a random question.
In the beginning of my career here I would answer after hours calls & texts from him but there was a problem with that. Since i set that expectation he would always expect an answer & if I didn’t answer he would get mad.
So like a lot of people in…
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Pregnancy hormones are no joke
Pregnancy hormones are no joke
I used to think that my hormones when I was PMSING were bad. I would describe it as me turning into Medusa.
Now those hormones seem like a walk in the park compared to pregnancy hormones. I went through work yesterday hating everyone & everything. There was no reason for the anger but it was around all day with no way to stop it.
It’s a good thing I’ve mastered the skill of controlling my crazy…
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Living for the weekend
Living for the weekend
In the past few months I’ve noticed that getting up & motivating myself to go to work is getting harder & harder.
I’m living for the weekends & they go by so fast that before I know it’s Monday again.
I don’t know if it’s because I’m burnt out at my job, I’ve been doing the same thing everyday for almost 3 years now with no room to grow or be challenged.
It could be because it’s summer time &…
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Things I’m LOVING right now
Things I’m LOVING right now
Here are some random things I’m loving at the moment;
Salty foods- chips, cheez it’s, pretzels anything that’s salty I want it.
Organizing my house. I’m usually a neat person but pregnancy has turned me into an OCD person. The more organized the better
Pinterest- Before I make any decision when it comes to my hair, nails, house, dogs, nursery room I spend hours on Pinterest looking up ideas.
Readin…
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Embracing the flaws
If there is one thing I’m more comfortable with within myself is accepting the fact that I’m going to make mistakes.
I’m not perfect & there will be times when I know better deep down but need to learn the hard way.
I used to obsess about how to not fuck up. It’s so mentally draining & a complete waste of time.
Mistakes happen sometimes more than once & that’s ok. Eventually I’ll learn & if it…
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Relationships without responsibilities
The other day I was listening to the radio & a topic came up in there relationship portion of the show.
A woman wrote in to say that she’s in a long term relationship with her boyfriend and they have a kid together, live with each other but she falling for someone else, they went on a date & she didn’t know what to do.
What the radio personality said really got me thinking. He said it’s easy to…
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Side Eyes & Resting Bitch Face
I’d like to think of myself as someone who is good at controlling my emotions. Especially in situations like work where you have to pretend to not be annoyed at the client asking the dumbest questions or the coworker that thinks they know everything.
I always thought I had a good poker face. No one can tell that I’m mentally telling you to go fuck yourself.
My coworker who has become a friend…
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