incorrect dallas stars 💫

“because we’re stupid” -thomas harley

[astronomically-rantanen]

Seguin: being bi doesn’t make me a slut. I just happen to be both

[astronomically-rantanen]

Mikko: if it didn’t hurt to crash your car I would be doing it all the time. some guy cuts me off going 20mph and I’d flip my car as a bit

[astronomically-rantanen]

Hryckowian: sometimes them getting a penalty isn’t enough. I wanna throw tomatoes at them like they’re a medieval criminal

[astronomically-rantanen]

Roope: warm water tastes round and cold water tastes pointy.

Miro, nodding: makes sense to me

Benn: …???

[astronomically-rantanen]

Hryckowian: they say “it costs $0 to be kind” as if being a hater isn’t also free

[astronomically-rantanen]

Robo during the playoffs: I’m the only bitch serving cunt here 😭😭😭 omg 😭 I’m soooo embarrassed 😭😭

[astronomically-rantanen]

Borque: *speaking in French*

Harley: the fuck are you saying?? I don’t speak croissant

[astronomically-rantanen]

Wyatt, to Harley: no babe I love that you piss me the fuck off

[astronomically-rantanen]

Borque and Hryckowian: does anyone wanna play outside later after work?

(this was their mic-ed up video to me)

[astronomically-rantanen]

Refs: do you realize that roughing is a penalty, right?

Hryckowian: please show me where it says that that’s a penalty

Hryckowian, after being shown the rule book: I’m not reading all that.

[astronomically-rantanen]

Mikko: okay, now I feel like I might’ve gone too far.

the refs: that moment passed a few minutes ago, now you’re going to jail (aka the sin bin)

[astronomically-rantanen]

Lundkvist: I just heard Lian call a dog a “fucking liar” because it barked like someone was at the door and no one was there

[astronomically-rantanen]

Seguin: if I punch myself and it hurts, am I weak or strong?

Esa: strong?

Roope: eh, maybe weak?

Benn: … that’d make you an idiot.

[astronomically-rantanen]

Mikko getting a penalty: am I in trouble?

the refs: take a guess.

Mikko: …no?

the refs, guiding him to the sin bin: take another guess

[astronomically-rantanen]

Wyatt: Mikko, do you think you’d be an “arr” pirate or a “yo ho ho” pirate?

Mikko: I’m a “not paying $600 for Photoshop” kind of pirate.

[astronomically-rantanen]

Robo: jail is no fun, l’ll tell you that much

Bourque: …you’ve been to jail..?

Robo: once, in Molopoly.

[astronomically-rantanen]

Robo, trying to spread joy during morning skate: good morning Seggy!

Tyler, stomach-down on the ice: “good” is debatable