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not worthy of a tweet (or too long for one)

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there are zero reasons why the minnesota wild aren't purple

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the public education system in the u.s. leaves parents completely on their own — most trying to do the best they can — for the first five years of a kid's life and then expects all the little ones to show up for school ready to be integrated into their for-free, learning environment

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Ruby in the summer; Lidkoeb in the winter

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every hockey player that has a favorite NHL player that shoots from a different side that they do has another secret favorite player who shoots from the same side as how their brain sees the game

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whatever percentage of the world are introverts is the baseline percentage of people who have no interest in talking to a voice assistant ai

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by 2035 or so, retirement homes should just be filled with old people playing video games

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your car always bears the brunt first of any conflict in a shared space relationship

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why is it that chefs do more to save the world than it's leaders

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i want one of those maps with the pins for the places youve visited but for all of the storage ive rented throughout the years

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in the early days of sports streaming over the Internet we would just get the same tv ads that were being aired locally and there's no way anything else is going to be better mister espn+ originals

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what kind of money do chefs pull that are the ones that make all the food for tv commercials cause it's not enough

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it now costs at least five million to have a new home under old trees

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white Christmas lights on commercial building exteriors should stay up until the end of February

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only advertising has the capability to allow me to go, in a matter of weeks, from knowing nothing about a company to absolutely hating and loathing a brand

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when life hands you lemons, you can go bankrupt building a franchise lemonade empire

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the year is 2033, and for Christmas this year the NFL is running 48 hours of consecutive football games played all around the world and half of the planet's population is happy to watch because they are isolated away from their families to prevent spread of one of the six pandemics

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what if restaurants offered child care how bad could the food be to still get 5 star reviews if at the end of the meals your kids were still happy and alive