Word choice is everything, yes? I was thinking about it, and was wondering if you'd explain for your viewers the difference between "knelt" and "got down on their knees" and "went to their knees" as an example of why it's so important?
I think when it comes to saying things in different ways, like in your example, it can be dependent on certain qualities of your work as to which you would go for and why, particularly context.
This is where you can really separate yourself away from other writers, because for all writing is a craft that can be learnt, it can also become a skill with enough ‘training’ and understanding of the practice.
In very basic terms, you want to keep things as simple as possible (less is more; at least this is mostly the case). Your choice of wording should hinge on:
The tone of voice you are writing in, so that the wording is consistent with the style of the narrator;
The context behind, and the nature of the action, to reflect a certain implication.
Naturally, there could be lots of other variables which make one or the other not sound good in a sentence, so there is a degree of personal judgement involved.
However, there should be a little voice inside of you that nags if you’re using the wrong kind of phrase or wording to describe something. We can demonstrate this with an exercise.
Let’s take a look at the three terms you provided in a standard piece of description to see how context can effect word choice.
Pretend you’re reading over work from your classmates, and they’re unsure of which term to use, ‘she knelt’, ‘she got down on her knees’ or ‘she went to her knees’. Based on their descriptions, which would you choose?
With the reading over, it was time for prayer. She knelt, hands clasped, and bowed her head along with everybody else.
With the reading over, it was time for prayer. She got down on her knees, hands clasped, and bowed her head along with everybody else.
With the reading over, it was time for prayer. She went to her knees, hands clasped, and bowed her head along with everybody else.
The bullet split through the air, too quick for anyone to anticipate. As the gunshot punctured normality and left only silence behind it, he watched as she knelt, blood seeping through her white shirt.
The bullet split through the air, too quick for anyone to anticipate. As the gunshot punctured normality and left only silence behind it, he watched as she got down on her knees, blood seeping through her white shirt.
The bullet split through the air, too quick for anyone to anticipate. As the gunshot punctured normality and left only silence behind it, he watched as she went to her knees, blood seeping through her white shirt.
Guns and hands were raised; there was no forgiveness on their faces. Trudy felt she had no choice when the command came. Reluctantly, she knelt, and the officers moved towards her.
Guns and hands were raised; there was no forgiveness on their faces. Trudy felt she had no choice when the command came. Reluctantly, she got down on her knees, and the officers moved towards her.
Guns and hands were raised; there was no forgiveness on their faces. Trudy felt she had no choice when the command came. Reluctantly, she went to her knees, and the officers moved towards her.
You might read these and think, ‘Actually, they all sound okay’ or prefer one over the other. This is because writing is subjective; there is often no right or wrong answer. However, here are the answers and we’ll look into why this is the case below:
Description One, ‘she knelt’.
Description Two, ‘she went to her knees’.
Description Three, ‘she got down on her knees’.
To be picky, I would prefer, ‘she fell to her knees’ for Description Two but for argument’s sake, we’ll go with the three examples you gave in your question.
The reason the answers are as such is because… ‘she knelt’ is a very simplistic, two-word way of describing one fluid action. The context of the description is, ‘this woman is praying in church’. It is customary in many forms of religious mass for people to kneel during prayer, it is a thing that many people are familiar with and have seen/heard of before. There’s no further implication to be made here; it is as normal as ‘he read aloud’, ‘they sang’ in this context.
However, for Description Two, you need to imply that the action of the woman being on her knees was not deliberate. She went to her knees, she didn’t purposely get down and kneel, she didn’t kneel because everyone who has ever been shot must always fall onto their knees, she was forced onto her knees as a direct consequence of being shot. Why her knees? Why didn’t she fall on her side, or onto her back? This description shows someone brought to their knees, and this image itself reflects that: 1) she stood against the bullet until it defeated her, 2) there is still some fight left in her since she hasn’t collapsed fully, 3) it puts her blood-stained shirt in view of the other character on the scene, perhaps for some plot-significant reason. Either way, the word ‘went’ insinuates a movement, from one state/place to another, that being from ‘fit and fighting’ to ‘weakened and defeated’.
In Description Three, Trudy kneels because she was told to. She deliberately acts, at first being on her feet, to then moving onto her knees. The addition of ‘got down’ suggests to lower oneself, to become subservient. Everybody knows that when you kneel, you move downwards, but the context of this is that she is having to lower herself beneath the power of the officers. The reader is having to watch her in the act of being told to get on her knees. It’s a clunkier way of saying ‘she knelt’, but a more deliberate, coerced way in comparison to ‘she went’ (since she is following an order, and not fluidly dropping onto her knees as a direct result of some other force).
You might pick other answers and be able to reason for yourself why you would prefer that over the other choices and that’s okay. What works for some, does not work for others but as a writer, you need to judge the best way to show the actions and scenes of the story so the writer understands the context and picks up more than what is on the surface.
This is where you graduate from demonstrating things at face value (i.e. ‘the cat sat on the mat’), to instead injecting sub-layers into a scene or exchange for the reader to pick up on (’the cat parked itself on the mat’).
I hope this is the kind of thing you were looking for, Anon. Followers, feel free to share your own insights and opinions with a reply or reblog!
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