just an average snorlax

the expected amount of sleepiness & girth

[tammiflubaker]

GET BLASTED WITH HYDRATION MY DUDES DUDETTES AND THUDES

[avgsnorlax]

I need somebody to be proud of me for overcoming my executive dysfunction/mental illness enough to make a dentist appointment for next week. I haven’t been to a dentist in about 10 years due to my stupid defective brain and this is a real accomplishment in my mind. Now that the appointment is made I’m so excited to go and am convinced that it will lead to life changing healthcare. Nobody in my real life understands how this makes me feel and I’m really craving a little validation.

[avgsnorlax]

I love being my store’s, like, World Cup correspondent. I come in to work every morning and these people - who are not soccer fans normally - immediately bombard me with WHO’S PLAYING TODAY?! Customers bringing it up to the cashiers and the cashiers being like Ohhh talk to AvgSnorlax about that, she’s the expert hahahaha

[avgsnorlax]

I’ve decided that I’m looking forward to Canada winning the World Cup 😁

[avgsnorlax]

[avgsnorlax]

Introduce yourself if you wanna be friends on Switch / ACNH !

[avgsnorlax]

Friendly reminder that you don’t get, like, a medal or something for … *checks notes* … refusing to take medicine when you’re sick?

[avgsnorlax]

Bless you, retail workers on Black Friday. The snarling shopping hordes don’t deserve you. Stay strong ✊🏼

[avgsnorlax]

Welcome to AvgSnorlax’s Cast Iron Hospital, step right up and guess who left aaaaaall the cast iron pans SOAKING IN THE GODDAMN SINK

[avgsnorlax]

Ronaldo throwing a public tantrum til he gets his way because ten Hag wouldn’t lick his butthole the way he feels he deserves 😂 I’ve always said that a great player with a piss poor attitude is not a great player at all. Prime illustration, thanks for being a poor ambassador for your sport.

[avgsnorlax]

Apropos of nothing, thinking about Ned Vizzini today. I hope that YA readers are still discovering him. As a depressed “gifted” kid his books really resonated with me.

[avgsnorlax]

Starbucks “Medicine Ball” who? * Having been exactly as productive as I’m capable of on this much-needed rest day, it’s time to settle in for the afternoon with my delicious potion (mix of green tea, peppermint, and peach with steamed lemonade & a generous spoonful of honey) and a book until an early bedtime. . #sickday #tea https://www.instagram.com/p/ClCETvOuyPi/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[avgsnorlax]

Extra Life | I'm raising money for my local children's miracle network hospital!

I've signed up for #EXTRALIFE this year to raise money for kids receiving care from my local children's hospital. I need YOUR help to reach

The MinnMax Show is 6 hours in and a little over halfway to their $40,000 fundraising goal to benefit Gillette Children's Specialty Healthcare in St. Paul, MN! They're auctioning off some cool gaming themed stuff, playing party games with a rotating cast of guests, being ridiculous, and really doing good for sick kids, so if you're inclined to donate please hit the link, or just show your support by joining in the stream chat - they'll be going til 9 am EST Sun. 11/13!

[avgsnorlax]

When the kids coming into my work are driving me SO CRAZY today that I text my husband, “Thank you for NOT having kids with me!!”