[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

I will never forget about the time when I was talking to someone about my past obsessions and I said Black Veil Brides was a big one and they were like what’s that? So instead of just saying it’s a band I made a slideshow consisting of 12 slides, facts about the band itself, members biographies, and a album history.

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

I deleted hid all the pictures in case you came back. I held onto the necklace I never got to have you. Everything that reminded me of you I held onto for dear life hoping, praying that you would come back to me.

But today I hit that red button so I would never have to see your face again. I gave the necklace away. Tomorrow I will burn the pictures. I will burn our memories, our laughs, the tears we shed, the late night talks, the moments spent in each other’s arms, the sunsets, the stars we sat under, the promises we made to each other that we would never break, the plans we made for that special some day. I will burn them all tomorrow, and from the ashes will rise a new day, a new promise, a new memory, and a new me.

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

You know, it makes me really sad how we went from being each other’s worlds to being complete strangers.

You were the one who I wanted to be with for the rest of my life, the one I was willing to do anything for.

And now you’re gone

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

Nothing hits harder than having a 6’1 girl best friend with anger issues who will willingly go to jail for you

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

Does anyone else get an overwhelming sense of happiness and pride when your best friend does literally anything? Like you got an A on that test? Good job my darling let me buy you ice cream.

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

Reasons as to why my dads side of the family hates me: cousin edition

One cousin is a good Christian girl who goes to a private art school and is a piano player

One is an all star baseball player

One is the golden child everyone loves

All of them are good Christian kids

Higher social status

All love my dad and stay in contact with the whole family all the time

Me:

Doesn’t see any of them more than once a year if that

Lives with my mom in another state

Borderline alcoholic

Never talks to any of them

Hasn’t gone to church in years ans started practicing witchcraft

What’s being athletic?

What does “successful” mean?

“Family will fuck you over more than anyone” kinda attitude

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

Me seeing couples at school: ew, gross. Get a room.

Me inside: why isn’t my mans here to be cute with me in public🥺

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

September 1st, 2020.

Dear diary,

I fucking hate everyone here expect for 3 people and I’m pretty sure everyone either hates me too or they have no idea I exist.

Whyyyyyyyyy

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

I miss those summer day back when I was little when I didn’t care about how I looked, when I didn’t care what people thought. When I believed the world was good and didn’t go beyond my little town. When I believed my parents loved each other and would be together forever. When I could run around my yard and let my imagination run wild. When my papa would sneak me candy or sit on the front steps with me and talk. When my great grandfather was my number one fan. When I was still innocent. When I wasn’t angry at the world.

Then I started to grow up. I began to care about how I looked, how much I weighed, and what people thought of me. I began to see the world for what it is, a scary place where lots of bad things happen. My parents spilt up and my family fell apart. My imagination began to dim. My papa got sick, 13 years wasn’t enough time with him. My great grandfather also got sick, but I was a little bit more prepared. I slowly began to lose my innocence. And sometimes I hate the world.

But I grew up. Sometimes it’s hard to block out what people think about me, but I just have to stop caring. I think I’m beautiful. Yes the world is scary but it’s also amazing sometimes, there are good people out there who do good things. Yeah my parents split but my mom began to be happy again, and my dad remarried to an amazing woman. She’s an incredible bonus mom and her family took me in. My imagination only grew and fueled my writing. My papa is watching over me, I know he’s with me everyday. And my great grandfather is still cheering me on in a better place. Yeah the world can suck sometimes, but it’s also a pretty cool place.

Growing up can be scary, some days I’m more prepared than others. But growing up has brought me some really amazing things.

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

Have I been snapping my boyfriend every 5-10 minutes counting down to the time he gets home so I can call him and see his cute face?

Yes. Yes I have.

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

Cute things my boyfriend does that no guy has ever done for me:

Kisses my hand

Rubs my shoulders

Wears my scrunchie everywhere including football practice

Will call me in the middle of work just to say he loves me and try’s to make me feel because cause I’m crying

Remembers my favorite flowers and got them for me (keep in mind he walked all the way across town to get them for me)

If I wake up before he goes to work he’ll call me just to say good morning

Holds my hand in stores or walking down the street

Gives me forehead kisses

Always reminds me to take my pills at the same time every night no matter what

Will carry my bag for me if it’s bigger than my purse

If I get hurt he kisses my scratches or little cuts

Rubs my feet when I got a foot cramp or just whenever (he’s the only one who I’ll let touch my feet I HATE people touching my feet, I’ll kick you in the face.)

Plays Hamilton for me/watches it with me

Cups my face and runs his thumbs over my cheeks

Watches my favorite movies with me even though he doesn’t really like them

Watches the sun go down with me

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

Yeah going on walks through the forest by the river watching woodland creatures is fun and all, but have you ever done that holding hands with the love of your life?

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME FIND THAT POST ABOUT THE SQUARE RAINBOW ROCKS THAT PEOPLE WANNA EAT.

I TOLD MY BOYFRIEND ABOUT THEM AND NOW IM GOING INSANE

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

Found them

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME FIND THAT POST ABOUT THE SQUARE RAINBOW ROCKS THAT PEOPLE WANNA EAT.

I TOLD MY BOYFRIEND ABOUT THEM AND NOW IM GOING INSANE

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

My country ass boyfriend who listens only to country and rock music and hates broadway musicals and currently cleaning and we’re on the phone and he turned on Hamilton for me.

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

Update: he’s now singing along with king George

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

My country ass boyfriend who listens only to country and rock music and hates broadway musicals and currently cleaning and we’re on the phone and he turned on Hamilton for me.

[awkwardmarshmallow1154]

Are y’all really in love if you don’t send him videos of you shoving a burger in your mouth and just taking a huge ass bite?