Phil's bad restaurant experience | 11.03.2021
Phil: I went to dinner with someone and it wasn't a date, it was more just like a dinner. They weren't a friend either, it was just a person I went to dinner with. Anyway-
Dan *hyena laugh*: What the fuck. Why did you go to dinner with this person?
Phil: I'm not going to give too many information details.
Phil: I'm about to spill it slightly.
Dan: Spill it, Lester. I will out them.
Dan: Do I know this-? Okay, we'll see.
Phil: They are 100% not listening.
Dan: We'll see. I'll tag them.
Phil *chuckling*: I wouldn't- No.
*Dan's hyuna laugh returns*
Phil: Dan, stop making me laugh. Listen!
*both laugh, Dan loudly, Phil fondly*
Phil *deep breath*: Ordered my food in the restaurant with this guy.
Dan *barely contained laughter*: Yeah, no shit. What else do you do in a restaurant?
Phil: And he was like: No, you should totally order the... sea-bass because it's amazing and you should really get the sea-bass. And I was like, I don't really fancy the sea-bass. I think I'm going to get this other thing.
Phil: I don't remember what it was. Anyway! I went to the toilet, I came back and they were delivery the food.
Phil: And the guy had gone to the waiter and CHANGED my order to the sea-bass.
Dan *protective mode engaged*: What the fuck.
Dan *metaphorically rolling up his sleeves*: Are you joking?
Phil: No! And it was really weird because I was like why would you do that and he said, it's just so nice and I got it for 2 so you could try it.
Phil: But in my head I was like, that is like 27 weird like flags of a person and I'm not even going to date this person.
Dan: That is the patriarchy right there. That is everything. Wow.
Phil: It was really weird.
Phil: Anyway, that was why I was thinking it's a good thing for a first date because you can pick up on lots of potentially weird stuff.
Dan: Phil, who was this person?
Phil: I'm not saying who it was!
Dan *insistently*: Text it to me. Text me the name. And I won't expose you.
Dan: Text me the name, text me the name right now.
Phil: Oh my god, I might have even changed the word sea-bass to a different food because I didn't want you to say who it was. Ehm.
Dan: I promise, I won't expose you. Trust me.
Phil *exasperated*: Oh my god.
Dan *laughter and shocked noises*: Oh! Okay.
Phil: Yeah, you remember it! I talked to you about that. Anyway-
Dan *hyena laugh*: Wow. Psychopaths! What! Oh my god.
*Dan instantly drops it and then moves on*