[aylasnow]

Just like a -calm- river.

Often I find myself in the need to describe your energy and everything I see it causes around. It glows. You shine. 

I see you yellow and orange most of time but still, I can definitely see you on blue eyes, everytime.

Between laughter and caresses, we reach that devine balance and find peace at the littlest things that the universe - one may think - is able to give. 

I sit and stare, deep in my dreams, I stare at you floating down the hill of life with a smile and closed eyes, my god! So natural it feels and I’m glad I can see you there, just in front of me. 

Yes, you feel like a river. You refresh, you heal, you calm, you love.

Slowly, the aura you own blended into my days, my nights, my heart.

I feel you. 

[aylasnow]

P.S. I never told you I was falling in love

I think I wrote you a thousand words and letters in every piece of paper I found around, and maybe million more in my head each and every night ... yes, since day number one. 

It felt like a need deep in my bones, but words just got stuck somewhere along the journey up my throat ... yes, I know you noticed a time or two. 

Sad, but true. 

Colors and sounds and feelings and dreams, they all got stuck somewhere along the journey to your ears. Remember? Those awkward silences we met sometimes ... hell, my dear ... I was dying all inside. 

So I filled thousands and hundreds and even more papers I can recall, with every word I just dreamt to finally let out. Darling, may this be the last one trying to reach out? 

Darling, 

Darling,

Darling,

Such a shame this fate that made us grow apart ...

P.S. (the last) .- I never told you I was falling hard.

[aylasnow]

To the one on the other side.

I swear I’ve seen those eyes somewhere, I think I remember them at least...

I think I’ve seen those lips, and think a clumsy joke about that frizzy hair,

I think I remember those wide shoulders and thin arms, those that look like could never carry more than a single pound...

I think I’ve seen that not-that-perfect skin, seems thicker, aged, but kind of the same,

No.

That’s not the dreamy look, the carefree smile, the shiny curls or confident  countenance.

Are you lost? Are you missing something? What took away your shine? 

Scream. Say something. Anything.

I can’t help to get the feeling you’ve been swimming like a thousand years ‘till now, with no sight but salty water, with no companion than the sound of silence, with no other choice than to keep swimming, keep moving.

Breath.

Do you remember how does it feel to breath in the woods? How does it feel to breath love? It seems like you haven’t really breath in like a thousand years ‘till now, no sense of life at all. 

What happened to you? You used to roar louder than the thunder and warm the earth like hundreds of suns combined. 

I’m speechless, feel useless, it scares me to see you there, like you are. 

Move! Damn it, move! Stop staring as if you can’t hear me. 

Please...

Please...

Please, do something. Break the spell, give me a smile, give me a sign that everything’s going to be alright through the mirror, here ... on the other side.

[aylasnow]

What it is to be loved

I thought I knew it all.

Maybe it’s not a thing to brag about but I’ve been adore, I’ve been a muse, I’ve been a Goddess. For many years I heard the words, felt the embraces and lustful eyes.

I was convinced I saw it all, felt it all, lived it all. 

Many lover’s promises took me to the stars and beyond, I sweared sacrifices and blood tears meant the ultimate proof of divine love ... oh how wrong I was ... those were just serpents in disguise, those were nothing but empty smiles. 

I discovered it later, I was no God, they were no devotees. 

Egos, resentment, fear, vengeance.

I let them elevate me even higher than the sun, I let them sink me at will. They broke me. I shattered. Faded. 

Then there was him. A sparkle in this new bright me, new bright day. There he was, I knew him. 

I have always known him. 

Soft breeze, messy hair, everything you see is what you get. Refreshing, exciting. The magnificent King for this Queen. 

Were not so called shadow lovers, dark era is over. We shine, we are light, we are golden. Warm, wild, free spirits.

Love is not meant to be chains and emotional rollercoasters. Love is not worshiping eyes folded. Love ... love is sharing wings and fly higher, shine and want the other shine brighter.

Love ... he lets me feel what is to be loved. 

[aylasnow]

From dreams to ghosts.

We saw nothing but faces and dreams, we thought of each other as God and Goddess, king and queen. So far from truth so we fell in disgrace, naturally.

For an instant we were heroes. “We can be heroes, just for one day” you sang, our own heroes, you were definitely right. We saved each other, we thought we were more than that. So wrong we were. 

You led me through my darkness, my nightmares, my need of owning someone else. I ... I think I did some good as well, at least you smiled, you were hugged, kissed, touched. Wasn’t that what you need? 

We saw masks and desires. The lowest of our desires. I saw your sharp teeth and claws. I showed you my chains and thorns. I didn’t deserve your violence, you didn’t had the patience. I wasn’t worth of your patience. 

Little by little the shine disappeared. You were no longer the bright knight, I was no longer the princess. We turned into demons for a minute, then we remained as ghosts.

[aylasnow]

Listen.

I am amazed by the look on your face when you listen, you are peace and concern, you are strength and tenderness. You shine and make me shine. 

You are warmth and freedom, I can only be me completely as long as I know you are listening. Touch. Feel. You are real. 

I can’t believe it. I believe it. Thank you. 

Through ages I’ve been hiding away this words I say to you, this feelings, this reasons, this fragments of my soul. You make this blossom, you make this come to light. Pure. Excitement. 

Who would’ve thought I’d make amends with this horrible fears someday? 

Free. 

Now, as you listen, I am free.

[aylasnow]

Sólo uno más

Fuiste sólo un pasajero más.

Te descubrí por casualidad, entre nubes y murmullos, despreocupado y a lo lejos, al parecer justo cuando debió haber pasado. 

Fuiste un soplo de brisa esperanzadora, un mensaje sutil del cielo ... ¿creerás en esas cosas? 

Deslumbraste mis pensamientos, de pronto todo cobró sentido. 

Llegó el júbilo, la nostalgia, el temor, el ansia, todo se brilló rosa algodón. 

Cerré los ojos un momento y el ruido desapareció, el mundo se volvió esta sensación ligera, serena, de sol.

Ya no existías y sólo estaba yo, el sol y yo. 

Tal vez fuiste una alucinación, una oración, un mensaje quizás. 

Tal vez sólo era mi yo volviendo a la luz y tú: sólo un pasajero más. 

[aylasnow]

Juego sin-sentido(s)

“Hola” - huye. Tira la piedra sin que te encuentre. 

Deliras danzante y te sonríes, “lo sabe y no lo sabe”, claro que lo sé, las coincidencias no existen. 

Apareces entre grises matices, no existes y existes, te niegas a liberarme o liberarte, te niegas a desaparecer aunque ya lo has hecho desde años antes.

Cobarde. Astuto. Sin sentido. 

Llueves ligero sin olor a lluvia y el sol palidece. No hay bendición. Juegas a ser gigante, a que todo te pertenece, es tu obra de arte. Te mientes. 

Fuiste mi arcilla y se te olvida que todo lo he visto, que todo lo escucho, que nada se me esconde. Éste molde ha sido llenado por tres almas antes, nada es nuevo, nada se me esconde. 

¿Que si te escucho? Fuerte y claro. ¿Que si me importa? ... 

Juega mejor a otra cosa, envuelve gestos diferentes, acaricia otros sueños. Rompe, destruye y quema otro paraíso. Vive. Desaparece.

[aylasnow]

Borned out of love.

I was born of love, love is what I am and what I desire.

Breath.

Some say I’m in love with the idea of love, that I easily loose ground and all sense of reality but, what is life itself without love? Emptiness. 

So I choose to believe in love, in magic, in that spark between souls and bodies. I choose to believe in pain, in hurt, in hope. In everything love has to teach us all. 

I choose butterflies and love letters, stars and candles, roses and cheesy songs. I choose holding hands walking by the lake and when in sickness, I choose kisses under the rain and when sadness. I choose all of it. 

Love. I was born of love. I write about it and to it. To all it has to offer and teaches. I choose love, and I invite you to read, to feel, to step into my heart, my dreams and fears, my falls and pains, my desires and closures.