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@azuredeliverer
Hello and welcome! My name is Shanelle, and this is an Independent and private role play and ask blog for Phainon! From Hoyo's Star Rail! Mun has been writing on Tumblr for a while now. So I'm sorry if my rules seem a bit strict.
Mun is 30+, as is my muse. She/Her!
Rules are under the cut!
𝖧𝗂𝗌 𝗐𝗈𝗋𝖽𝗌... 𝖨𝗍 𝗆𝖺𝖽𝖾 𝖨𝗍𝗌𝗎𝗄𝗂 𝗐𝗈𝗇𝖽𝖾𝗋 𝗂𝖿 𝗉𝖾𝗋𝗁𝖺𝗉𝗌 𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝖿𝖾𝖾𝗅𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌 𝗐𝖾𝗋𝖾 𝗋𝖾𝗍𝗎𝗋𝗇𝖾𝖽. 𝖶𝖺𝗌 𝗁𝖾 𝖻𝖾𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗌𝖼𝖺𝗋𝖾𝖽 𝗈𝖿 𝗋𝖾𝗃𝖾𝖼𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗇𝗈𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀? 𝖸𝖾𝖺𝗁... 𝖲𝗈𝗎𝗇𝖽𝖾𝖽 𝗋𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗁𝗂𝗆. A shaky breath is taken in, then released as he steps closer to the taller male, hand squeezing his once more.
❝ && if… I said I felt the same... && that my feelings weren't exactly platonic, what then, Phainon? Do you feel the same? Can you… Deal with what dating me would mean? ❞
Even if his mother wasn't sticking her nose into places it didn't need to be, there was the fact he was in the public eye. Because of name. Because of his online presence. He wasn't a renowned celebrity, but he was in the limelight enough. People would be watching him, posting rumors… The whole nine yards of it. He didn't want Phainon to get dragged into it unless he was certain…
Especially since Phainon was someone else with a bit of a popularity himself. Hell, they had met during modeling, of course he did. Perhaps Itsuki was worrying over nothing, but he couldn't help it. He didn't want those he cared about getting hurt.
𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐈𝐓𝐒, 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐀 𝐁𝐀𝐈𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇-𝐖𝐇𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐈𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐒𝐍'𝐓 𝐀 𝐅𝐔𝐋𝐋 𝐅𝐋𝐄𝐃𝐆𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐅𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍, 𝐈𝐓 𝐂𝐄𝐑𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐋𝐘 𝐇𝐄𝐋𝐃 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐇𝐄 𝐌𝐄𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐌𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓. Granted, h had already promised himself that if the other truly felt nothing akin to romantic feelings for him in return, he would accept it and they could still be friends. There was no hard feelings about it, if the other truly felt nothing. Itsuki and him could could be friends--it would be fine, like nothing had changed.
Yet, that isn't what he gets.
❝ Itsuki…. ❞ His voice is low, almost a murmur-blues softening more as he looks to the other. There….was only one thing the other could have meant, with how he was stating things. He sincerely doubted it was anything negative. Especially given his previous statement. Phainon debates his response, for a moment…before deciding…
Sometimes, actions spoke louder than words.
Thus, the white haired male gently pulls the other by the hand he was holding--releasing his hand in favor of going around his waist. His free hand moved to cup his chin-tilting it upwards so their gazes finally met once more. ❝ Let me show you how I feel, then. ❞
Nothing else is said, nor can be--for his lips immediately claimed his in that moment.
𝖶𝗁𝖾𝗋𝖾 𝖽𝗂𝖽 𝗁𝖾 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗇 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗎𝖾 𝖿𝗋𝗈𝗆? 𝖳𝗁𝖾 𝖿𝖺𝖼𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗆𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝖺𝖻𝗎𝗌𝖾𝖽 𝗁𝗂𝗆 𝗌𝗈? 𝖳𝗁𝖾 𝖿𝖺𝖼𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗌𝗁𝖾 𝗐𝖺𝗌 𝗍𝗋𝗒𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗍𝗈 𝖿𝗈𝗋𝖼𝖾 𝗁𝗂𝗆 𝗍𝗈 𝗅𝗂𝗏𝖾 𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝗐𝗂𝗌𝗁𝖾𝗌 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗁𝗂𝗆, 𝗇𝗈𝗍 𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗈𝗐𝗇 𝖽𝖾𝗌𝗂𝗋𝖾𝗌 && 𝖺𝗌𝗉𝗂𝗋𝖺𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇𝗌? 𝖳𝗁𝖾 𝖿𝖺𝖼𝗍 𝗁𝖾 𝗁𝖺𝖽 𝖺𝗅𝗆𝗈𝗌𝗍 𝗍𝖺𝗄𝖾𝗇 𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗅𝗂𝖿𝖾 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝗍𝗂𝗆𝖾 𝖺𝗀𝗈? Or the part of who his biological mother had been? The fact his eyes had witnessed her take her own life?
Suddenly all of his life experiences felt so very heavy. As if the sheer weight of them would be enough to break him to pieces outright.
❝ There's… So much I haven't told you. ❞
Comes the beginning of his answer, but he still didn't know where to go with continuing it.
❝ && some things, I'm not even sure if I can say right now… It's hard to talk about. I… Can say I don't think my current mother loves me at all && just views me as some kind of tool for her gain. I can also say that I… ❞
Was… Right now even an appropriate time for a confession now? Surely it should be at some time when he didn't just drop all of this heavy shit…
❝ That I... C-Can't stand the thought of you ever… leaving me… ❞
His voice had dropped lower && lower into a barely heard whisper by the end of the uttered sentence.
𝐈𝐓 𝐃𝐈𝐃𝐍'𝐓 𝐒𝐔𝐑𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐄 𝐇𝐈𝐌 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐇𝐀𝐃 𝐀 𝐋𝐎𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐒𝐀𝐘, 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐌𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓. 𝐈𝐍 𝐅𝐀𝐂𝐓, 𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃 𝐁𝐄 𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐒𝐔𝐑𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐈𝐅 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐒 𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐇𝐄'𝐃 𝐒𝐀𝐘. He didn't think the other could speak on it all right in this moment-at least, if he was understanding the situation correctly. Sato was a big name. You have to be living under a rock to not have heard of the family, so Phainon wasn't surprised, entirely, that there was something hidden and dark underneath the Sato name.
Unfortunately, most big name families had something.
❝ ….Itsuki… ❞ For now, the white haired male didn't focus it; Instead, he focused on the redhead before him. The fact that…he had, though quiet, admitted something to the white haired male…something that he could tell was hard. Something he was scared to say, in this moment. Did he….? Was this an appropriate moment to say the thing that's been on his mind for a while now? The one that made his heartbeat rise the moment he tried to bring it up--only to not be able to?
❝ …I don't think, if your reactions and what you've told me now are anything to go by, she understands what proper familial love is. Maybe even love in general. I think you have a better understanding of it…and I know for a fact I do too. As for…leaving you…. ❞ He pauses, debating how best to word it--for deciding, it was just better to be upfront and honest.
❝ Itsuki…I wouldn't even dream of such. I want to be here, with you. ❞
@azuredeliverer continued from x
𝖡𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗍𝗁 𝗁𝗂𝗍𝖼𝗁𝖾𝗌 𝗂𝗇 𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗍𝗁𝗋𝗈𝖺𝗍 𝖺𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝖻𝖾𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗃𝗎𝗌𝗍 𝗌𝗈.... 𝖴𝗇𝖽𝖾𝗋𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗇𝖽𝗂𝗇𝗀. 𝖳𝗁𝖾𝗋𝖾 𝗐𝖾𝗋𝖾 𝗍𝗐𝗈 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌 𝖻𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖨𝗍𝗌𝗎𝗄𝗂 𝖺𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗆𝗈𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍… The first was the fact that Itsuki was certain he couldn't keep his love for the other a secret anymore. It hurt him not to say the words that always bubbled up when they were together. The second, was the fact that confessing to such meant that Phainon needed to know the truth.
That his identity wasn't what it seemed.
The problem was, every time he thought to bring it up, he felt his throat tighten, && his anxiety would shoot through the ceiling. How exactly did he explain his situation? He was well aware the tale was almost unbelievable… There were some days he himself had trouble even believing his life was real.
But as he gaze up at the other, he knew that he couldn't just… Keep on living this lie without him knowing. It wasn't fair to Phainon.
❝ Even if i was to tell you that my life is a lie? That Sato Itsuki isn't my true name, but I never had a name before I inherited it from the original owner of it? I-I… ❞
A hand is raised to run over his face, he looking down at the ground now, the hand that was held by Phainon gently squeezing.
❝ I was originally an orphan, Phainon… My current parents adopted me to hide the fact that their son committed suicide. I-I know it's hard to understand… But this is the truth. My entire life since a child has been shaped to take their son's place. My birthday, my name, my everything… Is someone else's. ❞
𝐁𝐑𝐎𝐖𝐒 𝐅𝐔𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐖𝐄𝐃 𝐀𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐄𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐃 𝐓𝐎 𝐇𝐀𝐕𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐒𝐈𝐓𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐃, 𝐃𝐄𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐈𝐅 𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃 𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐀𝐆𝐄 𝐇𝐈𝐌 𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐄, 𝐎𝐑 𝐖𝐀𝐈𝐓 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐇𝐈𝐌 𝐓𝐎 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐔𝐄 𝐈𝐅 𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐈𝐃. However, before he can even get a word in-the other did finally begin to speak. His initial question makes the white haired male pause, spinels blinking twice. Yet, if the way the other was now once again not meeting his gaze, Phainon had no reason to doubt he was telling the truth. He wanted to ask what he meant by his statement-but elected to let the other continue instead, he remaining silent in this moment.
So…Sato Itsuki isn't his real name, and he was originally an orphan…Phainon wasn't truly sure what to initially say, in regards to that. There was so many questions bubbling in the white haired male's head, but--first and foremost, he wanted to comfort the ginger. Thus, he squeezed his hand once more--hoping it'd draw his gaze to him.
❝ …I…Itsuki. Deep breath. I'm not going anywhere, no matter what you tell me. That, I swear-. Okay? ❞ He murmurs softly, blues gentle as he steps closer to the other now. Would he let him touch him more…? He wasn't sure, and he didn't want to risk it. It must have taken a lot for him to even consider telling Phainon this information. Still…it all but confirmed what Anaxa wondered.
❝ My answer is, is that that still doesn't change my opinion of you. How I feel about you…does it worry me? Of course. Especially….given the original son's…cause. But it also confirms something we were all wondering about you….But I get the feeling there's more to this than that, isn't there? ❞
" If I told you the truth... Would it ruin us? "
@vermiliondreamer
𝐒𝐊𝐘 𝐁𝐋𝐔𝐄𝐒 𝐍𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐖 𝐀𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐅𝐑𝐎𝐌 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑-𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃 𝐓𝐈𝐋𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐉𝐔𝐒𝐓 𝐀 𝐁𝐈𝐓. 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐇𝐀𝐃 𝐇𝐄 𝐌𝐄𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐁𝐘 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓? 𝐖𝐇𝐘 𝐖𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃 𝐈𝐓 𝐑𝐔𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐌? To Phainon, such a statement didn't make sense at all. Yet…he could tell the other was dead serious, in this moment. If the way those mismatched eyes weren't meeting his, was any indication. Phainon frowns slightly at this, before carefully reaching out--a hand gently moving to take one of the gingers'.
❝ …Itsuki…it would take an insane amount to ‘ruin’ something between you and I. And by that-I mean you…geniunely not wishing for us to be around each other anymore. That kind of ‘a lot’. So, with that said-no, it won't. Tell me-what's going on? What's troubling you? ❞
He's not sure if he should be here today...his senses are going off and he's not quite sure what it means.
Phainon quick sketch heh..UGH ITS MESSY BUT WHATEVER ITS A QUICK SKETCH ANYWAYS...
“I’m scared of losing what we already have.”
@heavenlywinged
𝐁𝐑𝐎𝐖𝐒 𝐅𝐔𝐑𝐑𝐎𝐖𝐄𝐃 𝐓𝐎𝐆𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑, 𝐇𝐄 𝐔𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐑𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐍 𝐇𝐎𝐖 𝐄𝐗𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐋𝐘 𝐓𝐎 𝐆𝐎 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐂𝐔𝐑𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐒𝐈𝐓𝐔𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐌𝐀𝐋𝐄 𝐁𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇 𝐇𝐈𝐌. Azures meet golds, and after a moment of thinking--a gentle smile forms on his features. What was there to lose? Yeah..they'd push in a certain direction. However…Phainon was determined to keep the other in his life. He didn't want to lose him, at all….not as a friend, and….
Certainly, not as a lover. Not as anything.
❝ …That was me months ago, before I realized that saying nothing meant I might lose this and more with you. I won't let us lose what we have. I want…to continue what we have, and have more, together, Sunday. I'm not going anywhere--that I promise. ❞ He leans down slightly, carefully nuzzling into the other--being explicitly careful not to crush him.
❝ Please--won't you be mine, Sunday? ❞
“Tell me this isn’t just one moment. Tell me we’re choosing each other.”
SLOW–BURN SPARKS & QUIET HEARTFIRE || @undyingcrimson
𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐃𝐈𝐃 𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐀𝐘 𝐓𝐎 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐔𝐋𝐀𝐑 𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐇𝐀𝐃 𝐉𝐔𝐒𝐓 𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐓𝐎 𝐇𝐈𝐌? 𝐇𝐎𝐖 𝐈𝐒 𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐔𝐏𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐓𝐎 𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐏𝐎𝐍𝐃? Especially when the other had him pinned against the near by wall, golds meeting azures. Choosing each other…Mydeimos had really wished for him?
❝ …Mydeimos… ❞ He whispers softly to him, azures…searching. Wondering if this might be a dream. Yet, he had a feeling he could pinch himself--and the other would still be here. Still asking this question. Still pinning him to the wall, golds holding intense intent.
❝ I'd always choose you. At any time…anywhere. Always and forever….if you'll have me. ❞
@azuredeliverer continued from x
Ah, of course the other hadn't even realized he was doing it. Adorable, he was. Yuan just hope he didn't well.. KILL him with being affectionate, given his intentions.
❝ Simply was curious if you were avoiding eye contact due to personal feelings or nervousness or the like. ❞
He leans forward, index finger gently resting now under Phainon's chin. Was he perhaps too close? Maybe. Did the lion care?
No, no he truly didn't at all~
❝ Tell me, Phainon… If I were to kiss you right now… What would your reaction be? ❞
𝐖𝐄𝐋𝐋....𝐇𝐄 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃𝐍'𝐓 𝐓𝐑𝐔𝐋𝐘 𝐃𝐄𝐍𝐘 𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆; 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐇𝐈𝐓𝐄 𝐇𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐄𝐃 𝐌𝐀𝐋𝐄 𝐀𝐓 𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐒 𝐃𝐈𝐃 𝐈𝐍 𝐅𝐀𝐂𝐓 𝐀𝐕𝐎𝐈𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖 𝐖𝐇𝐈𝐓𝐄 𝐇𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐄𝐃 𝐌𝐀𝐋𝐄. Not because he disliked him--in fact, it's the opposite. He…wasn't sure when he had, but there was something more developing amongst himself with the lion. While that wasn't necessarily a bad thing--he just…originally didn't know if the other felt the same. Last he checked, he was also taken with someone…
❝ I…O-Oh.. ❞ Azure hues met golds, not fighting the other on his chin being grabbed….nor how close they were. The way the other was looking at him…told him there was intentions. Intentions…made plainly known. He felt like he was hearing his heart in his ears…
❝ …I wouldn't fight you, Yuan…if that was what you wanted to do. ❞
“Why do you always look away right when I catch your eyes?”
SLOW–BURN SPARKS & QUIET HEARTFIRE || @heavenlylightning
𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐇𝐈𝐓𝐄 𝐇𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐄𝐃 𝐌𝐀𝐋𝐄'𝐒 𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐌𝐀𝐊𝐄𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖 𝐖𝐇𝐈𝐓𝐄 𝐇𝐀𝐈𝐑 𝐏𝐀𝐔𝐒𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐒 𝐃𝐎𝐈𝐍𝐆, 𝐁𝐋𝐔𝐄𝐒 𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐋𝐎𝐎𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐎𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐃𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑. Had he been looking away each time…? Truth be told-he had never noticed it. Which--sometimes did happen…Mydeimos often told him he'd miss certain stuff because of how quickly he looked away from things or people. Maybe he was starting to see what he meant with that….
❝ I do..? I'm sorry, I'm not meaning it! Genuinely…can I ask why you were asking though? ❞
SLOW–BURN SPARKS & QUIET HEARTFIRE
roleplay starters inspired by slow burn love — lingering glances, almost-touches, and feelings that simmer for months before finally spilling over
LONGING IN THE LITTLE MOMENTS
soft looks, subtle shifts, that ache of wanting more but not daring to reach
“Why do you always look away right when I catch your eyes?”
“You keep brushing my hand. Accidentally… right?”
“You don’t have to leave yet. Stay—just a few more minutes.”
“Why does being around you feel… different?”
“I notice the way you soften around me. Even when you try not to.”
ACCIDENTAL INTIMACY
hands brushing, falling asleep near each other, warmth passed back and forth
“You’re freezing—come here. It’s just body heat… nothing else.”
“You can lean on me if you’re tired. I wouldn't mind.”
“Hold still, you’ve got something in your hair—just let me…”
“Didn’t mean to fall asleep on you, but… I didn’t want to move.”
“I like it when you stand close. Even if you pretend you don’t notice.”
DENIAL THAT’S OBVIOUS TO EVERYONE ELSE
everyone sees it except the two falling in love
“Why does everyone keep asking if we’re together? We’re not… right?”
“No, I wasn’t staring. I was… observing. For reasons.”
“We’re just friends. Totally normal friends who… talk every night?”
“Why does it bother you when I flirt with other people?”
“We’re close. But not that close. Unless… you want to be?”
RISING TENSION, UNKEPT DISTANCE
the space between you shrinking, breath catching, lips almost touching
“You keep stepping closer. Are you doing that on purpose?”
“Tell me to back up. If you don’t, I won’t.”
“You can’t look at me like that and expect me to think straight.”
“If you touch me again, I’m not sure I’ll be able to stop myself.”
“We’re either about to kiss or make the world’s worst decision.”
LATE NIGHTS THAT LEAD TO CONFESSIONS
quiet rooms, tired voices, guards slipping
“I shouldn’t say this, but… I feel safer with you than anyone else.”
“You’re the first person I think about in the morning. And the last at night.”
“I don’t know when it happened, but you’ve become… important.”
“Why do I only tell you the things I’m scared to say out loud?”
“Stay up with me. I don’t want this feeling to fade yet.”
FEAR OF RUINING EVERYTHING
the hesitation, the trembling, the hope
“If I told you the truth… would it ruin us?”
“I’m scared of losing what we already have.”
“I care about you too much to risk it unless you feel the same.”
“Don’t lie—there’s something between us. You feel it too.”
“Tell me you don’t want me, and I’ll pretend none of this happened.”
FINALLY CROSSING THE LINE
the moment where holding back isn’t possible anymore
“Come here. I can’t pretend I don’t want you anymore.”
“I’ve been waiting for you to make the first move.”
“If we’re doing this… don’t pull away.”
“I’ve wanted to kiss you for months.”
“Tell me this isn’t just one moment. Tell me we’re choosing each other.”
he who bears the world must burn (speedpaint)
Phainon
wikihow do i end my sisyphus cycle
"Long time no see"
⭐️💙⭐️Blue Royal Stars⭐️💙⭐️
