hello !! I'm so insanely sorry for being so inactive !! I've been so busy with a lot of things and a lot has been happening in my personal life !! And I've also been struggling a lot with my sexuality and label identity ... and honestly I just haven't had time to write and being completely honest I have no passion for it AT THE MOMENT, this happens to me a lot when it comes to writing but eventually this blog will come back.. just not at the moment β‘β‘
this is not to be negative but, do you know that Karina from aespa (if she is the pretty lady in your pfp) is a conservative, she is basically a trump supporter in American terms. It's really saddening to see her support such a person but yeah. Good luck btw. Love your work.
omg hello was this what that Instagram post was about that people were talking about ππ i never knew the depth of the situation cause winter is my bias so i didn't pay attention to it omg that's horrible..
(changed that shit so fast LMFAO CAUSE HELLOOO???)
ππππππππ - you and vi are what some call and on and off fling , anytime you two try to break it off with eachother the universe keeps pulling you both back ... this time vi tries to end it once and for all which seemed to be going quite smoothly until you almost fucking died by an olive.
πππππππ πππππππ - (not much of a warning this honestly so random) cursing , vi and reader are on and off , unserious short fic basically lol .. makeout session , thigh slap , err that's all.
m.list
The sound of people having their own conversations enter your ears , soft glasses filled with white or red wine clinking on and off the tables , laughter in the air as people indulged in their own conversations .... this was awkward.
really fucking awkward...
you fidget in the uncomfortable seat that was made for this fancy ass restaurant , pulling down your black skin tight dress as it kept riding up your thighs , your fingers softly patting on the table as you attempted to avoid eye contact from the red/pink headed girl across from you.
"I'm sorry, y'know .. but this just isn't really ... um?" The freckled girl stopped for a moment, her own eyes avoiding yours - that were still looking else where as if they'd make her crack. "working? yknow what i mean?"
you didn't answer her , simply because you weren't necessarily surprised by her words, considering you've heard them before.
finally, you stare at her, causing vi to be startled , the color red lightly soaking up her warm, freckled cheeks as she avoids your gaze once more. "Fine, whatever.." Your blunt words make vi look at you , her eyes slightly wide as she slowly nods, taking in your words."Uh - okay, but im being serious this time ... this just -" she stutters over her words, trying to find the right ones to make this go more smoothly.
"You're just ... alot" those words that escaped her mouth made your eyebrows jump.
this was new.
"excuse me? im what?" You ask the girl in response . You couldn't help but feel slightly offended by her choice of her poor words even though she was sorta correct ... your past relationships has always told you that you were sorta high maintenance , but how the hell was that your fault? god forbid a girl want attention 24/7.
"no! no - fuck! im sorry, i didn't mean it like that it's just ... you distract me a lot, and i have so much shit going on ..." vi stutters over her words in a panic, not wanting to offend you .. but it was true , she did have alot of shit going on in her life i means she just finished college a month ago and still hasn't been able to find a permanent job that's good enough , and her apartment rent is getting higher and if she's being honest with her self she doesn't thinks she's ready for a relationship .... but fuck , you ... you distracted the hell out of her, being around you was almost addictive.
she didn't know why that was, especially when you two are polar opposites but you were so fucking .... sweet ... in alot of ways that can't be described ... you care about her in ways alot of other people around her don't and she cherishes that dearly.
she likes that and it's hard to get rid of that , others probably wouldn't appreciate your blunt , slightly bitchy as others put it personality but vi had gotten used to it , and honestly she was sorta attracted to it.
but because you two were polar opposites anytime you'd actually try to be in an actual relationship, it always ended up with one telling the other, "maybe this isn't gonna work out," yet you'd end up in eachothers bed a week later .. a cycle that has been going on for atleast a month in a half.
At least you two were consistent.
"so what? you brought me to this overpriced restaurant to tell me this? mind you, our food isn't even at our table yet.."
"sorry! i just really need you to know this and they said the food should be out soon-"
"they said that 26 minutes ago , it doesn't take long to make chicken tenders and fries.."
"i don't know why you ordered that whe this is a seafood place"
"are you seriously critiquing my choice in food right now vi? seriously? you just basically broke up with me and now you're saying this?"
"....sorry?"
"actually, i don't think i want to eat anymore" you mumble as you grab your small purse off the table and gathering other items causing vi to frown at your actions
"what are you doing?" the colored haired girl questioned in slight confusion , her blue eyes watching you intently.
"Leaving obviously," you state clearly as you roll your eyes , your words make vi straighten her back and her eyes widened like a puppy as she mumbles a small 'wait'.
you didn't catch it as you decided to grab your leftover glads of white wine and down the rest of it , totally missing the olive at the bottom of the glass ... suddenly it felt as if your throat was clogged , your airways being blocked by a small ass fruit .. vegetable?
your hands drop the glass and they made their way around your neck, eyes wide as you looked towards vi with your big wide eyes before your body fell off the chair and right onto the cold floor of the restaurant.
vi was in the middle of a sentence when she saw your actions, her eyebrows knitted tightly in pure confusion as she watched you fall, her body shoots up in an instant calling out your name and running to your side, her eyes frantically eyeing your figure as she reaches down to pull you up off the ground.
she can hear the sudden panicked voices around her and gasps from others , chairs scraping the ground as other came to assist.
"fuck! what the fuck!" vi yells holding you up trying to get a look at your face, your hands still clung to your neck .. she could feel the shaky and unsteady breaths you attempted to breath "chokin- she's fucking choking someone help!"
"heimlick woman!"
"help her!"
to many voices entered her ears at a time , she squints her eyes in confusion.. what the fuck is him lick???
a man , suddenly walks over in quick speed - the waiter that was gone for almost 30 minutes now with your food quickly walks over, placing the hot food on the table before going to assist "heimlick!!" the man states loudly to vi , a thick french accent spitting out his mouth as he made an action of how to do a proper heimlick.
understanding and hearing what he said vi immediately closed her arms around your stomach, pushing in "Jesus! what the hell - come on!"
after a few more tries, you could feel the small olive making its way up your throat before it eventually shot out your mouth, making you breathe in deep breaths. the olive bouncing from the floor , and than nearly in an old short man's eye and then hastily in the hot plate of food that was just placed on your table minutes before .. neatly landing in the plate with chicken fingers and fries.
people's cheers were heard all around the restaurant.
"she's saved!"
"that short, pink haired gay girl is a hero!"
"how marvelous!"
vi's once tight arms loosen around you as she hastily turned you towards her facing front ... her hands making their way to your cheeks "you almost fucking died!" she exclaims with wide eyes flickering around your face and body "over a damn olive!"
"yeah im kinda aware of that!"
"holy shit! jesus you scared the fuck out of me oh my fuck!" vi spoke put rather dramatically as she removed her hands from your face and on her head in her hair .. she was still in shock about the nearly dying situation she could feel the pats on her back as people cheered for her.
your body shudders as unknown people came up to you , hands on your shoulder asking if you were alright ... you're aware they mean well, but my god, this was such an embarrassing situation , you tightly send them a smile before bending down to pick up your things that fell out your hands before hastily making your way out the place.
vi quickly followed behind you on your heels.
"Wait... wait! hey! you almost died, and now you're gonna walk away as if that didn't happen?" vi says almost sarcastically at you as she softly reached out for your wrist.
"hey , please .... let me take you home okay? is that okay?"
you sighed, feeling the hotness rise in your cheeks... feeling flustered and embarrassed at the same time.
"vi , im insanely embarrassed right now...."
"i know , that's okay..i don't think it's that embarrassing you choked on an olive"
her words that were meant to be comforting made you snatch you're hand from her grasp and cross them around your chest.
"baby it's fine okay , I'm really worried about still cause- shit that's never happened before and" vi continues still thinking about what happened in the restaurant.
"babe?" your word cut her off "didn't you break up with me a few minutes ago vi? and now since i almost died I'm your girlfriend again?"
"w-well um ... "
you sigh "how many times is this gonna happen?"
vi frowns at your sentence slightly tilting her head, "how many times? have you choked on an olive before? why didn't you tell me that-"
"no! god- vi i mean this!" your hand gestures between you and her "what even is this..." you spoke quietly as you leaned your back on the wall near you. vi follows your steps walking closer to you with a sigh.
no words are spoken, and because neither of you know what to say in response, the only thing heard was the loud voices in the restaurant main dining area .. the hall you and vi were currently in was empty , only you and her. vi leaned closer, and your eyes took time to study her as you always did her pinkish red hair , beautiful blue eyes that looked so incredibly soft at this exact moment as she stared at you ... her hand slowly coming up to softly caress your flesh on your thigh, making your body shudder under her touch.
"vi-"
"please.."
it was silent once more, vi didn't know why she said please as if she was pleading for something- and if she was she didn't know what for.
but all she knew in this moment was that she wanted your lips on hers.
her face moved closer to your own, you could feel vi's hot breath brushing against your face as she leaned in closer .. your lips parted, and your own breath became heavy due to the sudden change in the atmosphere surrounding the both of you , your hands moved to her button-up shirt, gripping it gently .. finally, she closed the distance between you, her delicate lips meeting your soft ones , while her hand firmly grasped your thigh before delivering a sharp slap against it making you let out a noise through the kiss as her other hand tenderly caressed your neck ... her lips danced against yours, savoring the sweet essence of your peach-flavored chapstick , which elicited a soft groan from her as she pressed closer against you.
you both were battling for dominance as her tongue slipped into your mouth ... you couldn't help but moan at the feeling , your thighs pressed together while your eyes closed tightly, your hands still clutching her shirt ... because of this, you knew for a fact you'd end up at vi's apartment, and you were well aware that you'd be waking up in vi's bed the following morning , which was hardly a shock ...
you can't even lie to yourself anymore ... you enjoy this ongoing cycle or pattern you and her have going on .. you grew to love the thing others would probably call slightly toxic experiences of waking up the next day with a throbbing love hangover.
this was so random but wtv lol..
written by @baambied please do not steal my ideas / work for your own use.
your older girlfriend, sevika, is struggling to fit a condom on her XXL dick π£² amab!sevika
you always knew sevika wasβ¦impressive. older, commanding, a little rougher around the edges than anyone else youβd ever met. but as soon as sevika slammed the bedroom door behind her, you knew nothing about today would be normal. she was already breathing heavy, her usual calm dominance tinged with frustration.
βdonβt you dare just stand there,β she growled, her hand grabbing your wrist and tugging you onto the bed. βi needβ¦focus.β
you arched a brow, leaning back on your hands, eyes trailing down all over her body, and then you froze.
the condom sat on the nightstand. and sevika? she was struggling like hell to roll it down.
you couldnβt help it. a sly, teasing grin spread across your face. βwow that looksβ¦difficult,β you said, voice light, almost innocent. βneed a hand?β
her eyes snapped to yours, blazing. βdonβt. even. think about it,β she hissed. but her fingers fumbled again, the tip of her xxl cock glistening in the dim light, pulsing, throbbing β too big for anything to fit easily.
βhonestly i didnβt think itβd be thatβ¦massive,β you teased, biting your lip. βyou might actually need help.β
that was it. she lost it. in a flash, she grabbed you by the shoulders, hauling you closer, eyes dark, teeth bared. βyou little brat,β she growled, voice low, dangerous. βyou think this is funny? you think you get to make fun of me while iβm-iβm tryin to ββ her hand slammed down on your ass, pulling a gasp from your lips. βiβll show you what happens to smart mouths.β
your heart hammered, but the grin stayed. you wiggled just a little, pressing against her, just to push her buttons more.
βoh? youβre gonna punish me?β you whispered, voice teasing. βi meanβ¦i donβt think you can even fit me on top of yourβ¦problemβ¦β
her eyes went wide, a mix of shock and rage and something darker swirling there. and then she moved. fast.
one hand yanked you by the hair to tilt your head back, lips pressing to yours in a bruising kiss, tongue slipping in, teeth grazing your bottom lip. the other hand went down, gripping the base of her huge brown cock, and she finally got the condom to roll downβ¦barely. it stretched over her length, the tight latex fighting against her size, her knuckles white from the effort.
βyouβre lucky i love you,β she groaned into your mouth, voice thick, strained, as she adjusted the condom, making sure it was secure. βor iβd β fuck iβd wreck you for that mouth of yours.β
you moaned, feeling her pressing against you, the head of her cock brushing your entrance through the thin fabric of your panties. βmmmβ¦ i love how angry you get,β you whispered, hands roaming her back, feeling the tension in her muscles. βmakes it biggerrr, oh so much bigger.β
her growl shook the room. she flipped you onto your stomach, hands pressing you flat against the mattress. βbigger?β she repeated, voice low, dangerous. βyou wanna see how big i can make it feel inside you?β
your body shivered at her words, at the tautness of the condom stretched over that length. she lined up with your entrance, pressing in just enough to tease, then pulling back, dragging the tip over your sensitive folds. βtell me you want it,β she demanded. βtell me youβve been teasin me so i can fuck that smug little mouth of yours later.β
βohh sevikaa i donβt just want it,β you gasped, voice trembling. βfuuck i need itβ
that was all she needed. she slammed in, hard, stretching you fully, every thrust deep and merciless. your cries filled the room, muffled against the pillow she shoved under your face. her hands gripped your hips, pulling you back to meet every violent, perfect thrust.
βyou like teasin me huh, sweetheart?β she growled between thrusts. βyou little brat,β her cock hit places you didnβt think were possible, every inch of her huge cock filling you, the condom straining with each punishing push.
βy-yes please! moremoremoreerβ you moaned, fingers digging into the sheets, body shaking as she fucked you harder, faster, a relentless rhythm. slap slap, squelch squelch!!
βyou think you getta play with me?β she snapped, pinching your nipples through your shirt, making you yelp. βyou think you getta tease me while i struggle with thisβ¦thisβ¦monster for you?β
your laugh was breathless, shaky. βi just, hahh looooveee watching you struggle, baby.β
that was it. her restraint broke. hands and mouth everywhere, she had you pinned, her big daddy dick driving deep, hitting every perfect angle, while she fucked you with a ferocity youβd never known. cheeks slapped, hair pulled, her voice rough and commanding. every inch of you was overwhelmed, overstimulated, drowning in her dominance and sheer size.
finally, after what felt like hours of being ravaged, she slowed, pulling back, breathing heavy, eyes softening as she looked at you, chest heaving. βshit, sweetheart. iβ¦god, i didnβt mean toβ¦β she murmured, almost gentle, stroking your hair, running hands over your bruised, glistening body.
you smiled, trembling, face flushed. βmmm you love me,β you whispered. βeven when youβre mad at me.β
she groaned, collapsing next to you, pulling you close. βi love you so much,β she admitted, voice rough. βbut you, youβre impossible.β
β We really could be Living young, wild and free β ΰ£ͺ Λ βͺ Sorry ( demo ) β Beyonce
౨ৠsummary : With the consequences of Sevika's actions finally hitting, everything around her begins to collapse - her home, her peace, and the family she thought she'd never lose.
principal post > next
The apartment was quiet in that strange way it gets after a storm. Everything was still, like the walls themselves were holding their breath. You stood in the middle of your shared bedroom, staring at the half-open suitcase on the bed.
Every time you folded another shirt, another piece of your life, it felt like ripping skin from bone. The clothes didn't even look like yours anymore; they smelled like herβfaint tobacco, motor oil, and that woody cologne you always told her not to wear inside the house. You stuffed another sweater inside just to drown out the scent.
Behind you, Sevika stood frozen near the doorframe. Her hair was a mess, her expression caught somewhere between disbelief and panic. "Please," she said finally, her voice low, raw, unfamiliar. "Please, don't go." You didn't answer. You couldn't. "My love, talk to me." The sound of the zipper scraping shut was the only response you could manage.
She took a step closer. "You don't even wanna talk?" Her tone trembled, desperate to find a thread to pull you back. You stopped folding and looked down at your hands. "Talk about what, Sevika?" you said softly. "About how you threw away everything we built? About how you made me believe in forever?"
You were trying so hard not to cry, biting the inside of your cheek until you tasted the metallic and familiar taste. Because if you cried, you knew what would happen. You'd run to her, like you always did. Like that night so many years ago when you were still just kids, when your mom got that job promotion, and you had to move away from Zaun for the first time. You'd clung to Sevika's jacket, begging her not to let go, your tears soaking into the leather. And she'd whispered, "I'll wait for you."
"I'm begging you," she said again, her voice cracking. "Don't take her from me. Don't take you from me." You kept your back to her, folding one last shirt, slower this time. "You took us from yourself, Sevika," you said quietly. "You did that the second you decided to touch someone else."
Her metal fingers curled against her thigh, the sound of the gears faint but trembling. "It didn't mean anything," she muttered, as if saying it would make it less real. "I was drunk, and-"
You laughed bitter and broken. "Drunk?" you repeated, your voice slicing through the air. "You were sober enough to drive home after. Sober enough to walk into myβ.... this house and kiss our daughter goodnight."
"I didn't mean toβ"
"You never do, right?" you said, finally looking up. "You never mean to hurt me. You never mean to lie. You never mean to fuck everything up."
She flinched. You saw itβthe slight tightening of her jaw, the way her mechanical hand flexed like she needed to grab onto something just to stay upright. "You're just walking away like this?" she whispered, her tone more fragile than you'd ever heard.
You zipped the suitcase shut, the sound final, cruel. "I'm not walking away," you said softly, your voice shaking in the kind of way that only comes from exhaustion. "I'm just... done fighting for something that doesn't fight for me."
Her breath hitched. "You can't mean that." But you did, You meant every syllable.
When you finally looked at her, there were no tears left. You had cried too much already - alone in the kitchen, in the shower, in the dark when the house was quiet and your daughter was asleep.
"I loved you," you said. "More than I should've. I built my life around you. I threw away things I dreamed ofβ school, work, everything. Because I believed in what we were. And you threw it away like it was nothing."
Her eyes glistened, and for a second, she almost looked like that same girl from years ago. awkward, strong, loyal. But that girl was gone, and you couldn't keep chasing ghosts.
"Please," she whispered, taking a step toward you. "Don't." The word came out like a warning. You raised a trembling hand, not in anger, but in finality. "If you touch me, I'll never leave. And I need to leave."
For once, Sevika didn't argue. She stood there, her body rigid, her expression broken, trembling under the weight of what she'd done. You picked up the suitcase, glancing once at the photo frame on the dresser, the three of you smiling, your daughter between you, her little hands gripping yours.
"I'm going to my mom's," you said quietly. "She'll help with the baby. Don't call."
And when you walked out, you didn't slam the door. You just closed it gently, almost respectfully - as if you were tucking the last version of yourself inside and letting it die there.
The house felt haunted without you by the echo of things that used to feel alive. Sevika sat at the kitchen table with the lights off, a half-empty bottle of whiskey in front of her, the glass forgotten somewhere near her elbow.
She'd tried using the glass at first, like it would somehow make this less pathetic, less real, but the shaking in her hands made that impossible. Now, she just drank straight from the bottle, the burn of it the only thing she could feel.
The clock on the wall ticked too loudly. The hum of the refrigerator, the creak of the floorboards. everything felt like noise and loud like never. Her chest was heavy, like her ribs were closing in around her lungs.
Every time she blinked, she saw you. the look on your face when you said, "I'm done fighting for something that doesn't fight for me." It hit harder now, echoing over and over, her punishment on a loop.
There were dishes piled in the sink, the same ones she'd tried to clean before you left, when she was shaking so bad she broke a plate in her hands. The pieces were still in the trash, dusted with dry blood. She hadn't cleaned it up. She couldn't.
Her hand, the real one trembled as she reached for the bottle again. Her metal one stayed still on the table, like a weight keeping her from floating away. The alcohol didn't help anymore. It never did. It just blurred the edges of her guilt long enough for her to remember all the things she ruined.
The couch still smelled like you. There was a little pink blanket from your daughter folded over the armrest, her favorite stuffed toy lying on the floor, one ear bent. Sevika's throat closed up. She hadn't seen her daughter in days. She didn't know what you'd told her. Did you tell her that Mama fucked up?
She tilted her head back, swallowing another mouthful of whiskey until her eyes watered. Her vision blurred, but not from the drink. From the tears she couldn't stop.
"Fuck..." she whispered, voice cracking. Her hand went to her face, covering her eyes as the first sob broke loose. It wasn't loud or dramatic was just raw, quiet, the kind that came from somewhere deep and ugly. She tried to breathe, but it came out as a shudder.
Her mind kept circling back to your laughter - the sound of it echoing through the house when things were still good. The way your daughter's little hands tugged at her arm when she came home from work. The smell of dinner on the stove, the faint sound of music, the warmth that used to fill every corner of this place.
Now, there was nothing. Just the smell of stale alcohol, and her own broken breathing.
"What the fuck did you do, Sevika," she muttered to herself, her voice hoarse, angry, desperate. "What the fuck did you do..."
She slammed the bottle down so hard the liquid splashed onto the table. Her metal fist followed, BANG!. shaking the whole counter. But she didn't scream. She just sat there, shaking, staring at her reflection in the glass.
The scarred face. The tired eyes. The woman who once promised to protect her family, now sitting in the ruins of it.
Eventually, she leaned back in the chair, her head hitting the wall behind her. The bottle slipped from her hand, rolling across the floor. She didn't bother picking it up. Her breathing slowed, her eyes burning from exhaustion.
"Come home..." she whispered into the dark, voice breaking apart halfway through. "Please... just come home."
