So far, the cats are not doing super well in terms of becoming best friends. We got a fancy color lightbulb, though, so while the cats hiss and fight, I play the Star Wars theme and pretend I am in space.
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Sweet Seals For You, Always

pixel skylines
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
trying on a metaphor

PR's Tumblrdome
$LAYYYTER

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⁂
Claire Keane
occasionally subtle

#extradirty
Mike Driver
Keni
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ

★
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
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DEAR READER

seen from United States

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@badillustrations
So far, the cats are not doing super well in terms of becoming best friends. We got a fancy color lightbulb, though, so while the cats hiss and fight, I play the Star Wars theme and pretend I am in space.
This is Steve’s bike.
He rides it, unabashed, all over our greater metropolitan area. He is a grown up man with his shit together I am serious.
When asked, Steve will boast that he bought this bike for $20 off of Craigslist; it once belonged to a college girl. He will then point out it is a girls’-frame bike, and probably also somewhere in there he will say “fuckin’ rad.”
—
The first time I saw the bike, I was picking Steve up from when he fell off the bike and busted his knee in the middle of the night. “Well,” I thought to my own self when I saw it, “I expected a perfect fancy mountain bike with important extra features I don’t understand. Not… what is this, a girls’ beach cruiser with a… is that a scrunchie on the handlebars? And some of it is purple.”
—
The second time I saw the bike, I was picking it up from bike valet at Earth Day. As I turned in the ticket, a volunteer asked me a few questions about the bike and its owner, to ascertain I was authorized to take it.
A few minutes later, the volunteer wheeled the bike up to me. “I don’t know what I was doing quizzing you about this bike,” he said, kinda chuckling in a friendly way.
“I don’t even have a bike, myself,” I said, wanting to laugh but also feeling fiercely loyal to the owner of the bike. “I mean this bike is better than not having a bike at all, right?”
“Maybe,” said the volunteer.
—
The third time I saw the bike, it was in my office, being stored after its owner attended my work fundraiser and didn’t want to ride home.
After three days, my boss inquired about the bike.
“Is this your bike?” “Um no. It’s Steve’s bike.” “Could it not live here for much longer, please?” “Yeah sure.” “I mean if it were YOUR bike of course it would be fine, but–” “I don’t have a bike.”
When I called Steve, he was busy, but suggested I wheel the bike outside and lock it to a pole for him to pick up later.
“No way, dude. I don’t want to be seen with it.” “Wow.”
I imagined myself, dressed in career-lady disguise as I am every day for work now, outside wrestling with the bike and maybe falling over and not knowing how to work the bike lock and everyone thinking I had a shitty bike with a scrunchie on it and no seat cover when I don’t even HAVE a bike… I felt shallow but I couldn’t.
Just a few minutes later, Steve came by to remove the bike (which I now realized I was thinking of as Bike, like it was a living being, a doofy friend… “Hey there’s Steve I wonder if he brought Bike!”) and later apologized to my boss. I felt inexplicably sad.
—
The next day at work, I missed Bike. I caught myself giving slight side-eye to my boss’s perfect fancy bike with important extra features I don’t understand, stored in his own office.
I did not completely miss the crumbly foam bits of seat stuffing Bike left everywhere, but I wished I had not minded about being seen locking Bike up outside work. And I smiled extra big after work that night when I saw Steve proudly unlocking Bike from a pole on our town’s most main-y main street.
“So is that a scrunchie?” “Yeah, it used to hold on my bike bell but…” “Yay, Bike.”
FYI Steve's reaction to this was "70 dollars off of Craigslist and it was almost new."
She is wonderful
The Grape of Wrath.
David Bowie’s Top 100 Books, with photo of him wearing A Clockwork Orange shirt alongside friend George Underwood, 1972.
Do you think I can use the Force to subdue my horrific gluten allergy show me how and I will do it
Fandom crossover.
Ohhhhhhkay so here is how sometimes my eyeliner lasts for a whole day in a sweaty humid climate, and can IF NECESSARY last a couple of days in Vegas. 1. Kat Von D Lock-It Tattoo Concealer 2. Wet N Wild Fergie Eye Primer #. Whatever eyeshadow you want within reason, or you can just use regular face powder 3. Kat Von D Tattoo Liner 4. MAC Extended Play Gigablack Lash Mascara 5. Ben Nye Final Seal These things work even with my greasiest, most hooded-since-birth eyelids in the whole world. So there you go.
At Farm Rock Chicagoland, 9/5/15.
The signs as Orange is the New Black characters
Aries: Red
Taurus: Stella
Gemini: Pensatucky
Cancer: Sophia
Leo: Nicky
Virgo: Poussey
Libra: Piper
Scorpio: Alex
Sagittarius: Taystee
Capricorn: Gloria
Aquarius: Soso
Pisces: Suzanne
… Bora.
Things the Previous Owner of My Copy of Moby-Dick Circled and/or Underlined.
Things the Previous Owner of My Used Copy of Moby-Dick Underlined, Circled, and/or Wrote in the Margins.
Page 12.
I don't know if it's what you want but my heart is melting at the thought of little Izzy and Duff and Steven trying to get their daddies back together
BRO SIGN ME THE FUCK UP FOR THIS
brain: I heard you liked rapidly cycling through self loathing, panic and depression
me: that is in fact the opposite of what I like
brain: haha too late welcome to the Fuck Train
My poorly-aligned contribution to the joyous GNR fan community.