Hey.

a badlydrawnhomestuck blog by @sodapops0lstice

[badlydrawndirk]

Are you… trans perchance :3

Yes. And no. I'm neither simultaneously, that's the fun thing about being in a void of nothingness simulating a guy you shittily mimic as a scribble. Nothing is ever rigid.

I can be a girl, a guy, a performer, whatever the hell I want to aslong as it adheres to comedy. Hell, I'm meant to be missing my right arm but as you can see it's definitely there. It's all fluid. The hat on my shirt doesn't even look like a hat half the time, it looks more like a sideways p. It's never the same colour.

Have any of you noticed that? Any of the people who see me and shout into my void notice that? I don't wear the same orange twice.

So to answer your question before I spiral down even further the shit for brains pipeline. I'm trans when the occasion asks for it.

[badlydrawndirk]

Yaoi…… or yuri…..

YURIIIIIII!!!!!!!!

Wow, rude. Also, incredibly gauche mod fourth wall break. This blog sucks, 0 hats out of five from me.

[badlydrawndirk]

Opinions on bagels

I've never had one. I don't know how many times I need to reiterate that my only homes have been, middle of Butt-Fuck, The State Previously Known As Texas and currently The Void, God Knows Where.

[askmspareader]

HAPPY 4/13

This was a really fun project and even if im not that active anymore i LOVE this community

(click for full resolution)

collab art with:

@kripsybac0n125

@badlydrawnaradia

@drawnroxystrider

@askdesperado-rocketchairs

@some-effort-trickster-jake

@badlydrawnjane

@poorlydrawneridan

@aaaaskarseniccatnip

@expertlydrawnroxy

@badlydrawnbabydirk

@askbronya

@badlydrawngcat

@badlydrawnjade

@badlydrawndirk

@badlydrawndavepeta

@badlydrawnlilseb

@badlydrawn-brostrider

[badlydrawndirk]

REGROW YOUR DAMN LIMBS IF THE AXOLOTLS CAN DO IT SO CAN YOU.

I'm a guy. Not a goddamn fish. Also, before any of you nerds start blabbering, I'm aware they aren't actually fish; I'm doing a thing, a thing called comedy.

Anyways, it's not that bad. Aslong as I don't look at it, or think about it, it goes away and my arm goes back to not being a gnarled stump with a tin can attached to it.

Couldn't tell you why, it just is. And I have zero plans to figure out why.

[badlydrawndirk]

where do you charge all your devices?

Same as you, from outlets. It's just that all my electricity comes from a generator.

[badlydrawndirk]

i dunno why but you seem more sarcastic than i thought you would be and i dont know whether to love that or hate that

Why do any of you freaks expect me to be nice to you after one of you creatures ate my arm off?

[badlydrawndirk]

dirk i am proud of you :) can i get a hug youre my fave guy ever

p.s. heres a 50 dollar gift card to five guys

*slides card to you and whispers “you would totally make a soda concauction”*

Thanks, I guess? I don't see why in particular little ol' fisherbro in the ocean is your gilded pet in metaphor only but fuck it, I'll take it.

You do realize I can't use gift cards, right? I'm in the middle of the goddamn ocean.

[badlydrawndirk]

Found your spirit animal

Bottom of the shades are too circular. Try again, fuckface.

[badlydrawndirk]

Yo I lost my message in a bottle somewhere in the ocean have you seen it

Don’t open it. It’s an inside joke with a friend I swear.

Not going to lie, the fucked up fish mutants down below probably dined and dashed on that bottle. I don't have much of a chance to snoop on some centuries old gossip. Heartbreaking for me.

[badlydrawndirk]

damn theres a weird amount of striders here.. also hi

-@poorlydrawnhal

[badlydrawndirk]

Can i powerwash you

Blighghfgggghmhfhggggggggg.

[badlydrawndirk]

"No hand holding ever, leave room for Jesus" How many hands does Jesus have anyway for all four of you to need to keep all of them free? Shit, maybe I was wrong thinking he was with Christianity, and he's actually a part of Hinduism

Man, I don't know, none of the Jesus images survived for me to see. I've just been guessing.

[badlydrawndirk]

uu: HELLO AGAIN. DIRK HuMAN.

uu: I AM SENDING YOu AN ASK. TO REQUEST. THAT YOu TELL ME WHAT THEY CALL. THE LOCAL RuMORS.

uu: WHO HATES EACH OTHER. WHO IS ENGAGING IN DISGuSTING BEHAVIOR. SuCH AS HOLDING HANDS.

uu: AND WHAT ARE EVERYONE'S WEAKNESSES. SO THAT I MAY DIVIDE AND CONQuER.

Caliborn from @seldomdrawncherubs

Oh yeah. I can give you the deets. Straight steaming hot tea that'll scald your weird boney head.

Jake is terrified of the colour blue, do not show it him. Jane is naïve like a beautiful baby lamb prepped as fuck for the sacrifice to the big man upstairs and Roxy is dumb as bricks. We've got some bitching black tar hatred for the world and eachothers and also no hand holding ever, we leave room for Jesus.

This is all true I can confirm. I would never lie to you.

[badlydrawndirk]

ur fuckable I’m turning u in2 a body pillow /nsrs

You gotta wait a year to be saying shit like that brother.

[badlydrawndirk]

What do you think of eyeballs?

Big fan of looking with them.

[badlydrawndirk]

Would you, uh, consider un-soliding your hair for your friends sake? Like, if Roxy organized a sleepover and wanted to do everyone's hair, or if Jake wanted to check the fluffiness quotient.

I'm pretty sure I couldn't even if I wanted to. I'd have to preform one of those rug cleansing videos on my head. And I don't have any of the chemicals they do, plus it's probably a shitty idea to even put them on my scalp.