i ' m a b a n d i t o

bandit. '93. particle. Oh, I know how to levitate up off my feet And ever since the seventh grade I learned to fire-breathe And though I feed on things that fell You can learn to levitate with just a little help Learn to levitate with just a little help

[banditvld]

vldyeseul​:

it’s like ripping a bandaid — the curiosity that had her on her toes, completely slashed and smothered by a simple two words of nothing happening. because yeseul’s life no longer revolves around becoming a ticking timebomb of a cliche rich girl gone bad trope, and responsibilities hitch her to the watchful eye of the higher-ups. and all she has left is vicarious living for a couple that never was, but once was inside her heart and soul.

but the couple resides in her imagination, and yeseul’s only left with the warm feeling of tipsiness grazing the surface of her skin — not the warmth from secondhand satisfaction. “you too? looks like you haven’t given off all hope yet.” and it’s the string that they throw, leaving yeseul to cling on instead of let go of dusty history. “come on, bandit. you could give me a bit more to go off of or do we have to down a few more bottles to get you to loosen up?” 

a refill of the glasses, and clinks of the shot — motions that follow in monotonous motions. yeseul stops, fingers balancing the soju glass as her chin rests on the back of her palm.  “i’ve got too much love in my heart to give. too much warmth, and people think i’m too cold. but you know what i think? everyone’s too sensitive and afraid to step on toes — why can’t we just say what we want and take it?”

Chuckling, Bandit shrugged and continued filling their shot glasses again as Yeseul suggested that more alcohol might cause them to loosen their tongue. Perhaps she wasn’t wrong. who knows what deep, dark secrets might blurt out after one too many shots of soju. Maybe they could finally discover some clarity about how they were really feeling regarding the Odum situation, because as much as they were sure they were confusing Yeseul, they likely felt twice as confused themself.

“You think you’re too warm and cuddly, and that’s why you’re single?” Bandit questioned in an almost condescending tone, raising their brow as they brought the shot glass to their lips, a sly smile around the rim as they threw the liquid back. It was at this point their throat began to feel numb, barely registering the drinks that continued to slide down the back of their throat.

“So, what do you want? What does Son Yeseul want to take, but is unable to?” They spoke as they haphazardly placed the shot glass down on their table, leaning back in their seat. Their arm was draped behind it, the back far too short to support their weight the way they’d like it to. Now with the alcohol settling in the pit of their stomach, their could feel their actions becoming sloppier, less inhibited. It was all they could do to sigh solemnly out of their nose as they waited for an answer. 

[banditvld]

odumvld​:

one thing she missed about having her own home was the ability to make it completely your own, just like bandit had. the dorm was a shared space, a medley of all the snc members personalities and it was nice — but, often times, it didn’t feel like home. of course, this wasn’t something she’d ever vocalize to the other members of her group but she couldn’t help but feel just a little more at home in bandit’s place than her own dorm, a sense of familiarity overcoming her even if she’d never been here before.

smiling at the cats in front of her she couldn’t help but boop their heads with a grin before returning her attention to the other rapper. “sure, i’d love to see more.” she answered as she sipped at her coffee, a small flame of excitement deep in the pit of her stomach at the idea of bandit opening up their home to her.  any tension she’d had before coming was now gone, odum finding herself feeling a lot more comfortable a lot more quickly than she’d anticipated.

Upstairs wasn’t grand or luxurious, it was simply a large room with a bed and a walk in closet, connected to the bathroom. Really, the whole upper floor was Bandit’s room -- not that they spent much time up there other than sleeping and bathing. Perhaps it was a poor design on their part, or perhaps they simply felt much more secure in the smaller space. Besides, they were sure the cats liked it downstairs much better, and it was easier to get the door if they needed to. Such as the occasions their little brother turned up unannounced.

“So, this is it. If this were an MTV house tour I’d tell you this is where the magic happens, but...” Admittedly, no magic really ever happened here. Trailing off they shrugged, padding over to their bed and sitting on the end of it. There were large windows overlooking the rest of the complex where they lived. Tinted, of course, so no one can see inside but they still get a good view. “What do you think? Do you think you can survive here for a little while?” With their question, they sipped at their coffee once more.

[banditvld]

noahvld​:

despite all their differences, noah truly loves his older sibling — nothing could change that, no matter what. they would always be extremely different people with very different upbringings but noah would always look at bandit as though they put the stars in the sky — he admired them more than anyone, and that was most likely never going to change. he could tell that, although easily annoyed by their younger brother, they were trying with him, trying to give him the time and attention he wanted from no one else but them.

the thought made him happy.

“that’s such a non answer.” the kostion member pouted, huffing at the flicks against his head. not bothering to suppress his yawn, noah pressed his face against his older sibling’s thigh instead of wiping at his eyes. the days since his debut felt never ending, and he missed days were he could actually sleep in later than six am. “you’ve gotten too good at giving non answers, i don’t like it.”

With the yawn that sounded from their younger sibling, they couldn’t help feeling a sense of responsibility for him. Part of them wondered if he had planned what was going to happen once he turned up at Bandit’s place. It’d be very in character for Noah to have shown up on a whim. There wasn’t a spare bed, and the rapper wondered if they were to offer him to stay, would he be happy with the couch, or would he be expecting to share the king bed? Something was telling them he’d try and work his way into the bed with the Particle member and the cats.

The hand that previously flicked against Noah’s skull rest gently against his head, running fingers through his hair fondly and letting their nails scratch against his scalp. Absentmindedly they de-tangled a small knot that seemed to have formed, not thinking much about the action. “When are you planning on going home?” They questioned, ignoring the comment about the non-answer, in a way managing to give yet another one. The question wasn’t because they wanted Noah to leave, but it was definitely getting late. “Do you have a schedule tomorrow?”

[banditvld]

vldseungyong​:

There wasn’t much use in resting his eyes, but Seungyong let them fall shut anyway, taking a deep breath in and exhaling all the air in his lungs. Sometimes – especially in situations that were as stressful as these – taking a moment helped, but today he was just feeling awfully tired, and he wasn’t confident the coffee would be of any help in alleviating that. It was more deep-seated than surface exhaustion, and couldn’t be fixed with a night’s rest, so pushing forward and through it was really the only option, especially with the schedules they were going to be facing over the next few days. Promotions, somehow, always managed to suck his soul out; at the end of them, Seungyong was just going through the motions.

“Could be much worse. A lot longer, at least.” But it wasn’t the length of the flight that was the problem; it was everything around it, no matter how streamlined the process was now with so many years of practice. At least they didn’t have to take care of their own baggage. “I’ve no idea, that’s why I’m asking you.” He blinked his eyes back open, staring at the ceiling for a few moments before rolling over his head to watch Bandit drink. “I mean, I could ask, but that’d be work, so – I guess that means it’ll be a surprise.” Not that it mattered much; they’d stayed in so many hotels over the years that he couldn’t care less at this point. “You need anything from the store when you get there? Minho forgot his shampoo.”

When it came to flying, it never seemed to matter how much sleep you had the night before. You could have been knocked out for ten hours before arriving at the airport, and you’d still feel as if you hadn’t slept a wink for a week. Maybe that’s why there’s always bars at the airport, to make you more alert and a little more lively for your flight. One of the negative things about being in the public eye ( and having fans board the same flights just to get a glimpse at their idols ) is that there’s always eyes watching. Meaning, there’s no way Bandit could get a drink at this time in the morning without there being an article created about it. 

It was all Bandit could do to shrug at the question once more, sinking back into their chair, arms folded across their chest with their jacket securely tucked between their limbs and their body. Granted it would be harder to drink their coffee from this position, but they’d figure it out. “No one you can text?” The rapper questioned, knowing that it was likely the minimal amount of effort that could be put in to potentially have an answer. “No. They have shampoo at the hotel, and whoever Minho’s rooming with will probably have some. If I’ve forgotten anything, they probably have spares at the hotel.” That was one of the good things about KMG, everywhere they usually booked for their senior groups was... Decent.

[banditvld]

officialparticle sometimes things are the most clear when it’s the darkest

[banditvld]

vldyeseul​:

yeseul’s never been the nosy type — not one to open her ears to swirling whispers of rumors and dig her nose into get a taste of blooming relationships. yet, when it comes to a topic that entangles bits and pieces of history, years of friendship with two people she treasures close to her heart — she becomes a bit more in tune to the curiosity lodged deep inside her mind. and it’s this bite into interest that directs her question straight center, down the middle of it all.

“nothing’s happened?” a pout forms along her lips, faux disappointment buried between the furrows of her eyebrows. but in reality, disappointment might have been suitable knowing that she was always on their side through and through the test of time. “that’s no fun — not what i wanted to hear. a decade of pining emotions, but here’s a clue…” her fingers balances the glass in between, moving it slowly from side to side before shooting it down her throat. “you can’t say it was never meant to be if you’ve never said a word about the matter. but no matter what you choose — know i’ll always be team bandit and odum.”

at the question posed from them, she’d react with nothing more than a huff of laughter nearly choking on the alcohol burning through her skin. “me? i have a few fuck buddies, no strings attached. exes? i’ve never had a complicated ex story, you know that. it always ends in friendship — i’m simple and clean. no room for love when i’m busy making money.” 

Pursed lips with a shake of their head, Bandit confirmed that indeed, nothing happened. Leaning forward, they folded their arms beneath themselves as they rest on the table, head titling as they waited to hear what their friend had to say about it. Which, if they knew Yeseul the way they thought they did, had to guess it would be something to with how boring the news was. The manager was one to shamelessly push for what she wanted, never the type to miss out on an opportunity. That was both for her personal life, and her work life.

Slowly, they could feel the soju settling in the pit of their stomach, feeling warmer and warmer every time the glass reached their lips. Sometimes, that was what you needed, a little extra help to let go of your inhibitions, loosening your sense of self that you keep so tightly wound. God forbid Bandit actually let somebody in, giving them a glimpse into the inner workings of their mind for a change. Being closed off was safe. Being closed off was comfortable.

“Me too.” They admitted quietly. Maybe they deep down hoped that one day, things would work out the way they were meant to all along.

“No room for love when you’re busy making money, you’re such a warm hearted person, you know...” They were teasing, they knew that in a time of crisis, Yeseul would be there. However, she always made her intentions and priorities known before engaging in anything. The opposite of Bandit, their purpose always a mystery. “It’s a busy life. I don’t blame you.”

[ishikawayukis]

[banditvld]

vldyeseul​:

she took the role of an investigator, glasses askew with fingers instinctively reaching for the bottle to settle the restlessness of her fingers. there was something endearing about the quaint pocha that rests in the nook of seoul. a feeling of familiarity and homely warmth that opens its arms to welcome her each time yeseul steps foot with the same simpering smirk that rests easy across her face — and here, she’s able to let go, speak freely.

her smile doesn’t fade so easily, but rather the corners of her lips perch a bit higher at the reply of blase nonchalance she expects from them. “nothing’s changed minus the bellowing truth that she’s now single, and so are you — and if i’m not mistaken, fate brings you two into the same industry.” the tips of her fingers delicately graze the surface of her mouth agape — feigned shock to the revelation that writes itself boldly. 

“you might have?” her brows wriggle strictly once, a chin that juts to signal the bottoms up of their refilled glass — and now, yeseul’s curiosity has the opportunity to be satiated by a few knocks of cheap drinks. “you guys smash yet? or are you still doing the cat and mouse, too sad to speak feelings type ordeal again?” she’s crass, and bold — but she’s aware that bandit’s become her right-hand witness to the terrible mouth she’s held for all these years.

Their friend’s reaction could have been predicated as she began poking and prodding into the rapper’s personal affairs with Odum. If anything they would have been surprised if she hadn’t been her nosy self and asked if they’d hooked up. Part of Bandit wished they could say yes to her question, after all these years. The other part really wasn’t sure if that was something they still want with her. It had been a long time since they’d thought about these feelings, and they weren’t sure what was new, and what was still left over from being a lovesick teenager. 

“Sorry to disappoint you, but nothing’s happened.” Bandit knew that Yeseul would want the yet at the end of their sentence, but they weren’t sure if there ever would be a yet. While the Particle member had confessed their once strong feelings to their friend, there had never been any indication that Odum had, or does, feel like that towards them in return. With their glass refilled, they brought it up to their lips once more, throwing back the liquid as they pondered, glass slamming to the table perhaps a little too hastily when they were done. “After a decade it’s still the same, I don’t know if it’ll ever change. Maybe it was never meant to be.” 

Now that they thought about it, in the time they’d both been in the industry Bandit wasn’t sure if they’d seen Yeseul in a relationship during that time. “You can’t ask me any more questions until you tell me whatever the hell’s going on with your love life.” They were aware it was probably less of a love life, and more like hookups for a brief distraction. 

[banditvld]

vldseungyong​:

august 31, 14:57pm with @banditvld

Seungyong disliked airports not for the general atmosphere – which was already stressful, with people getting ready for departure and saying goodbye to loved ones, baggage claim and gate changes – but for the crowds. At this point in their career, they were used to flying, and at the very least he’d never had an issue with cramped leg space or pressure in his ears that wouldn’t pop until much later, but the masses of people still got to him.

So it was routine, but it wasn’t routine that he liked much, and he grimaced as he slid into the seat Bandit had been keeping free for him with their jacket, handing off the coffee he’d promised he’d bring the other. They’d board within a few minutes, at least if everything went as promised, and they’d go with priority, but until then they were still stuck waiting at the gate with a view of the field that he had long ago stopped appreciating.

“At least it won’t be long.” At least they wouldn’t fly to the States, and he wouldn’t need to sleep on the plane. Seungyong took a sip of his coffee and tipped his head back against the seat, which wasn’t any more comfortable than sitting up straight because of the angle. “Has anyone mentioned hotel arrangements to you?”

Airports were... Not Bandit’s favorite. There were many reasons to dislike airports, and the rapper was sure if they started listing them all they could write an award winning novel about it, but they were unfortunately a necessity in this line of work. Most of the time when they were forced to fly, Bandit found themself dissociating through the whole experience, not really remembering what happened between checking their baggage and boarding the plane, only being forced back to reality during the landing. Everything was always so rushed, but they still managed to find themselves waiting around for hours at the same.

Okay so maybe they hated flying altogether.

Just as they were zoning out, the Particle leader took his rightful seat next to Bandit, only jolted out of their daydream as they felt their jacket being put onto their lap. The first thing their gaze landed on was the much needed coffee being handed to them. Them and Seungyong were one in the same when it came to coffee -- black.

“Flying to Japan isn’t the worst, I guess,” they tried to muse somewhat enthusiastically, but their voice sounded like it was droning on without an ounce of passion to be heard. Shaking their head, they inhaled the smell of the caffeine before finally bringing it to their lips, savoring the taste. “No, they never do. You? You’re the leader, I guess you’d know before me.”

[banditvld]

odumvld​:

from what she’d seen, the place was so uniquely bandit that she knew no other place like this existed. it was warm and familiar without ever having seen it, but she would swear up and down that this is always the kind of place she’d pictured the rapper in, even a decade ago. little things like that only served as reminders that, even though quite some time had passed, bandit was still bandit, and she was still just mae sarang — idol life be dammed, they still both had hints of the teenagers they once were.

taking some more time to appreciate the mug in her hands, she couldn’t stop the smile spreading against her lips. what a stupid mug was her only real thought as she took another sip of her coffee, shaking her head slightly. “i love it. it’s ridiculous and i love it.”

following bandit around, she couldn’t help herself from grinning at the cats — she’d heard about them, yes, but it was different from seeing them in person. taking her mug in one hand, she approached the both of them with her hand out, letting them sniff at her as they pleased. “i think they’re lovely.” she spoke in a soft tone, attention having completely shifted from her friend to the two animals in front of her. 

.

It wasn’t a surprise that at the mention of Cammy and Feta, the attention had turned to them. They weren’t exactly usual pets, and with their curious and inquisitive nature they always found themselves to be the centre of attention one way or another. Watching from a distance, Bandit had one hand tucked securely in their jacket pocket, leaning against the wall with their own mug of coffee in their other hand as they wanted the interaction. They felt... Happy.

“They’re decent company,” Bandit replied softly before sipping at their coffee, a content ahh sound leaving their lips as the hot caffeinated drink hit the pit of their stomach. The rapper didn’t mention as much yet, but they assumed that if Odum shared the main bed, the four of them would be bunking together.

“Do you wanna see the rest of the house?” The Particle member questioned, finally padding over quietly to the cat tree and rubbing at one of their cat’s ears, looking over at Odum with a raised brow before heading towards the stairs. “There’s a bathroom and a half built studio over there, but the rest is up here.” 

[banditvld]

noahvld​:

though they were siblings, the two had had completely different upbringings — something noah often forgot, but was reminded of every time he seeked attention from his older sibling. the younger didn’t have many memories of their father past the age of five, he knew enough to assume certain things, like what he thought of his children acting anything less than whatever was ‘manly’ in his eyes. in the years bandit had lived with the man, they’d had to push down a part of themselves, whereas noah had been allowed to forge his own way, and just be himself openly.

sometimes he forgot how different he and bandit really were.

“people already think i’m copying you.” he shrugged, eyes still on their older sibling. from the moment he’d landed in seoul, people had made comparisons between him and bandit — not that he minded, when his whole life he’d wanted to be just like them. the hair hadn’t meant to be a copy though, noah genuinly wanting to try something new out, just to see how he felt about it — and bandit’s answer hadn’t been the one he wanted. pouting up at them, he widened his eyes to stare up at them. “i don’t care what people think. i wanna know what you think.”

.

For years, Bandit had learned the hard way how it can feel to have someone you love and adore tear down every aspect about yourself that you even remotely like. It was ironic, how the rapper had gone through that ordeal with their father, and turned out as cold and stubborn as they had. Although, never would they ever depreciate anything someone was excited about. Anything that you feel passion for is worthy of adequate time and attention, even if you don’t like or it or understand it yourself.

While they knew how icy their exterior had become since their relocation to Korea as a teenager, slowly it had been thawing when they were around their brother. They hoped he knew they were trying. 

The older of the two had only been teasing when they commented about his hair. These days, it was near impossible to be the first to do, well, anything. Inspiration comes from many sources, and sometimes maybe that was your sibling. “You wanna know what I think about your hair?” The rapper questioned, flicking the top of Noah’s head, not enough to hurt but enough to annoy him. That’s what siblings do, right? Noah seems to think so, anyway. “As long as you’re happy with it.”

[banditvld]

What is your favorite article of clothing?

It changes all the time. Usually, it’s something I’ve made. Right now it’s a striped sweater that goes down to my ankles, I don’t remember where I got it, its an old article that I rediscovered in the back of my closet.

[banditvld]

What is one thing you never leave the house without?

A pair of sunglasses and a face mask. Both for the health benefits, and for the anonymity it gives me when I’m outside alone. 

[banditvld]

What’s the next step in your career, solo or otherwise?

Nothing too exciting, I’ll continue working on Particle songs -- whether or not KMG choose to use them is a different story -- and I might have a feature or two lined up. You’ll have to wait and see.

[girlonpanic]

[banditvld]

jaebeom demonstrates active listening      (or how to make your heart skip a beat) 🤍

[psychiclibrarian]

[banditvld]

kiwonvld​:

There are moments in life where one is completely and utterly vulnerable at the hands of Fate and Time, sisters spinning Their tales and woes of friends and foes, hearts close and eyes locked. Was this where the heart lay, or was it something else, somewhere else tucking back deep within the caverns of his skull and catacombs of his breast? While his heart skipped a beat at the intimate touch of the other, the man’s brain seemed to take over, although allowed a soft pink hue to flush his cheeks out of… confusion? Uncertainty? Embarrassment?

Dishes shivered in the man’s hands, skin sensitive under the rapper’s gentle hold as he couldn’t help but lock eyes with them.

Star into the abyss long enough and the abyss will stare back at you

Their eyes — pools dark enough to reflect the light of stars — captivated him, drew him in and made sweat begin to spring up in the places that indicated nervousness, which is perhaps why the leader balanced the plates in one hand before quickly wiping his brow with the back of the free hand. An attempt at being discrete, but the success rate was likely low. Both hands back on the dishes then, one still held captive by the rapper’s.

A soft “What?” was all he could manage, letters feeling as though they were clogging the back of his throat, unable to form a string of consonants and vowels, unable to make sense of things. He readjusted his hold on the dishes, but didn’t allow Bandit’s hand to move from his.

“Are you…? Do you want more of this?” Kiwon asked, the words surprising even himself as he stole a glance at the scrapes on the dishware before back to the rapper. He swallowed, saliva thick and slick with a nervous bitterness that refused to subside.

The single word that escaped from Kiwon’s lips was a surprise to Bandit, because, well, they didn’t have an answer. What? They didn’t know. Their hand had made a move before their brain had a chance to catch up and make sense of the action. Unable to look up at the man handling the dishes just yet, their gaze became fixated on their own appendage, one that felt unattached and out of control. Like a phantom limb. A feeling of betrayal began to swell in their chest, only it was one between themself and and their own gesture.

Lips pursed, they registered that Kiwon was speaking again, eyes flickering between their own hand and the remnants of the breakfast they shared. It was all they could do to lean back in their seat, almost like the half.life leader’s skin had burned them. Closing their hand into a fist, they tucked it away into their lap, tongue wetting soft lips as they worked overtime to try and figure out what to say that wouldn’t sound... Well, weird. No doubt the other idol would be looking for an explanation for the action that came out of the blue, seemingly out of nowhere.

“No, I... No.” Great. Fantastic. Particle main rapper and songwriter unable to string together a proper sentence to express their feelings. It’s not as if it’s their whole career or anything of the sort. Shaking their head just enough for the motion to be barely visible, they crossed one leg over the other as they dared for just a moment to look up at Kiwon, before looking down at their own hand where it was practically hiding in their lap. It still felt like it was burning, although it could be the feeling of treachery the rapper had placed upon it. “Do you need help washing up?”