#BANDNOISE : james ' jamie ' martin, a private & independent original celebrity character. WRITTEN BY INK ( SHE/HER, 25+, MELB., AUSTRALIA, ADHD-C ). various inspirations. sporadic activity. est. 20250914. rules. bio. stats. affiliated with :

@theartofmadeline
art blog(derogatory)

Kaledo Art
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
One Nice Bug Per Day
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Not today Justin
Jules of Nature
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Discoholic 🪩
sheepfilms
Xuebing Du
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

pixel skylines

Janaina Medeiros
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JVL

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hello vonnie
Keni
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@bandnoise
#BANDNOISE : james ' jamie ' martin, a private & independent original celebrity character. WRITTEN BY INK ( SHE/HER, 25+, MELB., AUSTRALIA, ADHD-C ). various inspirations. sporadic activity. est. 20250914. rules. bio. stats. affiliated with :
i was more accurate than i knew when i described jamie as a golden retriever bf ............................ • love pawsona
♡︎ ONLY MURDERS IN THE BUILDING S1 ! ... quotes from season one of the murder mystery show. alter as you see fit.
sometimes, when i can't sleep, i imagine brutally murdering that dude. and i'm out like a light. works every time.
as i said, it's a lot. don't be here if you don't like a lot.
really ? ! do you not see this coat ! ?
just when it's all starting to feel the same, that's when you get hit by something you never saw coming.
i don't know why this keeps happening.
even the elevator wanted that story to end.
you don't have to answer that, [name]. i mean ... i mean unless you want to because i'm also curious.
that's really all we want, isn't it ? more time with the people we love.
fuck 'em. i'm offer only.
you're living here in the middle of a renovation ?
alone isn't so bad.
i'd rather die.
sometimes it's easier to figure out someone else's secret than it is to deal with your own.
i literally feel myself ageing when i listen to you.
he seems to have had a really sad, quiet life.
i've fallen in love with so many dead people.
i don't want to think about back then. i'm a different person now.
if you see me 'round the building, act like you don't know me.
i can't think of anything less pleasant.
i live on long island where they give out loose cigarettes and lighters.
it was fun, mostly. until the end.
i saw that bullshit on youtube this morning.
aren't you a little old to still be playing hardy boys ?
they're trying to help me find someone who cared about you.
intriguing, and yet totally backwards.
i don't have a clue what's happening here, but none of it's interesting.
i just need to know how invested i should get in you.
i mean, you're insane, but that's usually who people want to follow.
this is exactly like die hard !
i'm gonna stop you before you accidentally say i'm not sexy.
dips are an actual meal. i keep telling you this.
no. to that whole sentence.
oh, so it's my turn to tell you my red flags ?
well, i could use a drink and a dip.
i like you. and i would like a second date.
what's more dangerous ? taking advantage of a second chance, or letting it pass you by ?
wait, are you at that pretzel cart ? i want one.
you're lying to your boyfriend 'cause you feel like even the way you're thinking about me is cheating ?
twins creep me the fuck out.
um, i was adorable.
i think ... i've kind of been waiting for you.
i dug the fucker up and ripped it out of his cold dead hands.
you don't quit, no matter how bad it gets.
i know that was insensitive.
and what's the safe word for me to get out of this conversation ?
wait, you've got a girlfriend ?
sorry, i'm not good at confrontation.
hey, would it be okay if i came to see you tomorrow ?
do you think his sex toys could reveal anything ?
we are so gonna get tarantino'd !
this is the first romantic relationship i've had in years ! why are you trying to ruin it for me?
i'm a sucker for lonely guys with notable age differences i meet on elevators.
i want you to know this is definitely one of my rougher breakups, [name]. i really did fall in love with you.
okay, where did you get a quaalude ?
i can tell you what happened. you know, the whole insane story, unless you need to get going.
i have nothing left to teach you.
you know, i'm thinking of putting myself out there again.
And please don’t tell me that I’m dreaming When all I ever wanted was to dream another sunset with you
♡︎ SOME LIKE IT HOT ! ... from billy wilder's 1959 film. mentions of alcohol, suicidal ideation. alter as you see fit.
what's the password ?
well, if you gotta go, that's the way to do it.
i want another cup of coffee.
how can you be so selfish ? we owe rent.
i thought you weren't talking to me.
if you gave me a chance, we could be living like kings.
i'll make it up to you.
i just thought I'd go home and have some cold pizza.
i think I'm gonna be sick.
there's a dance tonight.
i'm only with them 'cause i'm running away.
hey, you want some ? it's bourbon.
i always get the fuzzy end of the lollipop.
it's freezing outside.
i don't want her to know we're in cahoots.
you stay here as long as you like.
you poor thing. you're trembling all over.
manhattans ? at this time of night ?
i have this thing about saxophone players.
i don't care how rich he is. as long as he has a yacht, a private railroad car, and his own toothpaste.
i'm workin' the night shift and i got a bottle of gin stashed away.
your face is familiar.
would you mind moving a little ? you're blocking my view.
it's amazing we never ran into each other before. i'd have remembered anybody as attractive as you.
we have to be very careful whom we pick for a roommate.
oh, you can do better than that.
i'm not afraid of you. i'm thin, but i'm wiry.
why do i let you talk me into these things ? why ?
it's not how long you wait. it's who you're waiting for.
would you like a glass of champagne ?
i was in love once, but i'd rather not talk about it.
how can you think about food at a time like this ?
if i wasn't such a coward, i'd kill myself.
your glasses are beginning to steam up.
do you think he's too old for me ?
i'm not stupid. i know there's a problem.
[name], this may be my last chance to marry a millionaire.
are you always this generous ?
my compliments to the chef.
i told you, i'm not very bright.
i forgive you.
nobody's perfect.
↪ ᵀᴴᴱ 𝑀𝐼𝐶𝐾 , ꮲꭲ 2 . ( a series of sentence starters from season 1 of fox's sitcom , “ the mick ” adjust phrasing as necessary . )
damn , [ name ] , how many cars can one person crash ?
i can't help it — when i'm behind the wheel , i'm a slave to the power of the machine .
other people worked very hard to buy those cars , and now they're mine .
why you gotta put me in a cage ?
i'm not a rat , okay ?
shut up , you don't know what you're talking about .
i am NOT joking , i don't wanna do this .
guys , we don't snitch . that's it , end of story .
will you listen to yourself ?? "jUsT tElL tHe tRuTh"
[ name ] , you snitch you die !
pretty sure that was already there when i walked up .
how is this good news ?
everyone's gonna call me a traitor , like you .
don't worry about it , it was worth it .
what are you doing tomorrow night ?
just say the words , and it can be yours .
oh , it's like that , huh ? fine .
what was that ? i can't hear you ... you can't breathe ?
you better figure something out , 'cause if you don't — i'll have to go public with this .
that's called extortion , stupid !
those guys are just covering their own asses , they don't even like you .
as easily as i can save you in this world , i can destroy you .
if anybody messes with you , let us know - okay ?
with a dong like that , you'd think he'd be happier .
do i look like i'm playing , [ last name ] ?
oh , your breath reeks of booze .
i hope you have a plan .
i was up all night watching prep school movies in preparation .
there are some real evil illuminati-type vibes in here , right ?
there was a time i could see , and i have seen .
oh , i'm just getting warmed up .
we are but food for worms , gentlemen .
whose burrito did i just step in ?
get out of here , the tv's mine .
what did you do to my shirt ??
how would you feel if i ran around stealing your clothes ?
we had to kill him cause he wasn't a team player .
no more special treatment for you .
i grew up in squalor , i am perfectly comfortable in it .
[ name ] , don't you dare !
didn't know you were gonna be so weird about it .
if you decide that you don't want me around , just tell me and i will go .
you're not the only game in town , buddy , okay ?
you don't know who i hang out with .
jealousy is the reason people hate us .
you don't have to worry about labels , just like who you like .
i hope this is some sort of emergency .
you kept me waiting , so i'm gonna get right to it .
don't make this your thing , this is [ name's ] thing .
suing is how rich white people solve their problems .
i wanted to sing and show you there's nothing to be afraid of .
i'm so nervous for you ... i want to throw up and run away .
you could have me escorted out , but you have no security .
ooh , dark scary room ! you know what they call that in prison ? they call that a blind spot . great place to catch a shiv .
what kind of operation are you running here ?
you didn't do anything wrong . i was the problem , not you .
where i'm from , the guest gets the good seat .
i drink , smoke , lie , steal ... i'm drunk right now .
i will ruin him . please don't let me do that .
i'm not the one doing whatever you guys are doing ... what are you doing ?
i'm not judging , at least he's a hot mess .
it's the wolf's job to eat the sheep , so y'know ... this was bound to happen .
i will RUIN you when we get home .
i'll give it back to you in a minute , you're gonna get it back .
the suit you destroyed cost a grand !
come on , [ name ] . i'll help you get settled .
he can't know it was my idea .
she made her mean bed and she can sleep in those scratchy sheets .
woah , tough day at the office ?
what the hell did you just say to me ?
you are right ... no matter what you say about anything .
we do this all the time , but usually there's some art to it .
this is not nearly as fun as i thought it was gonna be .
you're letting a bunch of nerds pick on you with their computers ?
why don't you just systematically destroy her ?
i can see where this is headed , so i'm just gonna hit the road .
she ripped me open , stuffed me full of devastation and then sewed me back up again .
leave me alone , this is all your fault .
why are they yelling ? are they angry cause they're bad musicians ?
i will never understand your generation .
let me have it . how bad is it ?
do you have any idea what i saw in there ?
you should come and check out what's going on outside , cause i think you'll be pleasantly surprised .
i just want us to be friends again .
it would be such a silly waste of time for someone like me to be mad at someone as insignificant as you .
the truth is , i pity you .
when the universe gives you a sign , it's not up to you to ignore it .
[ name ] gave it to me . it means i'm in charge .
i'm not comfortable with the whole arrangement . where's [ name ] ?
this is outrageous ! i'm getting passed over again ?
i don't have a problem , i'm just blowing off some steam .
you wanna get in on this ?
you deserve to take a time out as much as anybody else .
sorry , i didn't realize you were the fun police .
having money has reaaally changed you .
i've lost control ?! oh no , you dumb , dumb idiot . YOU'VE lost control .
that's a gross overreaction .
i will show myself the door in a ... graceful and classy manner .
thanks for sticking around .
look , i realize i did some questionable things in there .
i just felt like the universe was giving me a sign .
i'm the only one worthy of its power !
keep it in your pants and follow my lead .
it's no offense , i just don't know you very well .
let's go over this one more time , just so we're clear .
we've already been over the terms .
what's in it for you ?
i like the element of surprise .
wasn't expecting that . are you okay ?
i saw a burglar , i didn't know what to do ... so i SMOKED his ass !
you SHOT me ! what the hell's the matter with you ?
that gunpowder's like a hundred years old , it probably just broke the skin .
what about the police ? they're expecting a gunshot victim .
guys , we've gotta move this along , okay ?
you got it , i'll get you a pillow .
you're lucky no one was killed .
here's the thing about the bordeaux ... i drank it .
i'm so sorry that you had to keep our mansion warm .
how do you think the police found them ?
if you're done criticizing me , i think i'll head on up to bed .
you want me to do the jobs no one else wants ?
can we pick this up tomorrow ? i was shot , so ... i'm very tired .
it has nothing to do with that . okay ? now please leave .
i wanted to thank you for having my back earlier .
that had nothing to do with you . i was just trying to hurt them .
it's chloroform . i found a recipe online .
[ name ] , don't come at me with that .
i was gonna do whatever it takes . i'm not a quitter.
i wanna tell you , i really do . but first there's something i need .
oh my god , you're bailing again .
innocent people don't sneak in and out of their own home .
'cause i don't like you , that's why .
i'd rather get mowed down in a hellfire of bullets than listen to you screech .
you don't have to lie . i heard you guys .
how was i supposed to know you were gonna hug me ? i didn't even know you knew how to hug .
thinking about how golden retriever-y jamie is vs knowing there’s gotta be a relationship in his past that ended badly, & wanting to explore that
starter call !
♫ @variations ... are you coming or not ?
her voice breaks through the hubbub of the crowd, & jamie's head shoots up, distracted from the conversation he's found himself in. “ yeah, yeah, yeah ! ” he enthuses, his arm still slung around the shoulders of one of the people he'd been talking to. cheeks pink, gaze bright, like talking to people rejuvenates him. & others. jamie is, he thinks, whatever the opposite of an energy vampire is. he turns to one of the group, apologetic. “ i'm bein' summoned. ” a shrug of what can you do ? & he's extricating himself from the group whilst trying to wrap up all conversation threads. finally he appears by chris' side, shrugging into his jacket. “ sorry, i got distracted. ” someone approaches, & jamie pauses for a moment before giving in. “ you go on ahead, chris — i'll catch up. ten minutes, i swear. ”
↪ ᵗʰᵉ 𝑫𝑼𝑺𝑻𝒀 𝑻𝑶𝒀𝑩𝑶𝑿 . ( a collection of various unsorted sentence starters . adjust phrasing as necessary . no longer updating . )
why are you here ?
drive . drive fast .
i think we should make an informed decision .
are you coming or not ?
you’ve been avoiding me .
[ name ] , what were you thinking ?
this should be your priority .
let me hold you for a minute .
get out of my way . i won’t tell you again .
that wasn’t supposed to happen .
can you keep a secret ?
i don’t know what i did to deserve you .
you seriously think i could’ve done something like that ?
you’re safe with me .
sorry isn’t good enough .
where is all this coming from ?
who told you about that ?
sorry i’m late , i got caught up .
you’re being paranoid .
why are you looking at me like that ?
you’re the single most important thing to me .
all i’m asking is that you hear me out .
whatever they told you , it’s a lie .
we shouldn’t stick around here .
hold my hand , i don’t want to lose track of you .
[ name ] … truth or dare ?
i love you . nothing’s gonna change that .
can you tell me what happened ?
you can’t come around here anymore .
back off , okay ?
what , you don’t have time for me anymore ?
you’re asking for too much .
i’m trying to start a new life .
what do you mean , you aren’t coming back ?
sometimes i think you must hate me .
why can’t we just talk about this ?
i know i fucked up , you can stop rubbing it in .
you’ve got quite a reputation .
i’m not usually like this , i’m sorry .
please , just let me explain myself .
i love watching you work .
we’re on the same team .
did you ever tell anyone ?
you’ve got a lot of explaining to do .
really funny , you’re very mature .
you call THAT a PLAN ?
can we get out of here ?
i thought things would be different .
this is not up for debate !
do whatever you have to do .
karma’s going to get you for that .
it could’ve been a lot worse .
i asked you to leave me out of this .
maybe it’s time to take a leap of faith .
i never want to see you again .
can you see how many fingers i’m holding up ?
i’m gonna be there when you get what’s coming to you .
you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me .
i’ve been waiting all night for this .
i told you not to contact me .
sometimes i really think you have a death wish .
what do you need ? — what can i do ?
i would do literally anything to keep you safe .
that was supposed to be a secret .
you haven’t called me that in years .
stop telling me to calm down !
we make a pretty good team .
i have so much i want to say to you .
i’m not going to let anyone hurt you .
can we please not do this right now ?
wait , wait … just breathe for a second .
how are you holding up ?
why don’t you stay the night ? i’ll take the couch .
i don’t need your protection !
you’re not making this easier on yourself .
are you going to let me in ?
i’m supposed to be protecting you .
i will kill you if i have to .
do whatever you have to do .
this is going to hurt , i’m sorry .
what happened to you , where have you been ?!
there was nothing you could’ve done .
you’re all i need right now .
i don’t believe in love at first sight .
have you been following me ?
i need you to believe me .
what do you remember ?
i’m not a good person .
what the hell’s going on with you ?
you’re being followed .
just when i thought my day couldn’t be any worse .
i’ve been having weird dreams .
so you’ve been lying to me this whole time ?
are you trying to get us killed ?
this is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me .
i never asked for your help .
you’re being followed , pretend you know me .
why has it started to feel different with you ?
don’t worry , i have a plan .
i heard everything .
do you need to sit down ?
i have the right to know what’s going on .
i’ve just gotta catch my breath .
stay out of my business .
what did you think was going to happen ?!
don’t cause a scene .
tell me something about you that i don’t know .
can i buy you a drink ?
what if … we played spin the bottle ?
this was never a problem until [ name ] came around .
you can’t ask me to make that choice .
are you seeing anyone right now ?
i need you to listen to me , we don’t have long .
you’re lying , that doesn’t make any sense .
you look … stunning .
what are you trying to prove ?
who died and made you the boss of me ?
you can’t just show up here like this .
let me make it up to you .
there’s no way i’m leaving you like this .
can we stay like this ? just for a little longer .
i don’t need you to fight for me .
so … you lied to me ?
you’re the only one that can help me .
i can’t help you if you won’t let me .
i never introduced myself , i’m [ name ] .
i expected more from you .
you have no idea who i am , do you ?
are you real ? is this real ?
can i stay with you ? just for the night .
you’re going to get yourself killed .
why did you help me ?
tell me what i can do to help .
pick a card , any card .
i never wanted any of this .
i love you . you don’t have to say it back .
do you wanna get out of here ?
what the hell are you talking about ?
i should have trusted you .
get your head out of the clouds .
how is any of this MY fault ?!
what aren’t you telling me ?
i can’t help you if you won’t let me .
it’s never just one with you , is it ?
you’re not supposed to know about that .
shut your mouth .
i haven’t kissed you yet , today .
where is this coming from ?
come over here and make me , then .
keep lying to yourself , see where it gets you .
i’m not a bad person .
is that what you wanted to hear ?
we can’t be seen together .
i can’t give you what you want .
i need you to leave .
are you drunk ?
i’m here , i’m here . i’m not going anywhere .
you might want to take a seat for this .
have you been listening to anything i’ve said ?
i haven’t heard from you in weeks .
you’re jealous , aren’t you ?
who do you think you’re talking to ?
what are you reading ?
you could’ve killed me !
come on , we don’t have time for this .
i just need ten minutes of silence .
really ? that’s all you have to say ?
we could leave , you know . go far away .
you don’t look too good .
i never want to see you again .
why can’t you just leave me alone ?
i thought you died .
you’ll do anything for attention .
give me another chance .
how’s the weather up there ?
all you do is hurt people !
i’m sorry , none of this makes sense .
you need to get out of here before anyone sees you .
i told you i didn’t want you around here .
is that supposed to be a threat ?
you’ve changed .
don’t look at me like that .
it’s a beautiful day , don’t you think ?
i did what i had to do .
you never know when to stop .
i’ve got to get home , it’s getting late .
i have nothing to prove to you .
stop LYING to me … all you do is lie .
you don’t have to be nice to everybody .
don’t tell me what to do .
pull your head out of the past .
nobody can help me . i can’t even help me .
we are not talking about that right now .
are you new around here ?
you have no idea what you’re starting .
i’m gonna get us out of here .
whatever you came here to say , i don’t want to hear it .
everyone’s staring at us .
is there anything i can do to help ?
i won’t cause you any more trouble .
– just follow my instructions for once !
do you want to come in ?
i just didn’t know what to do .
you need rest , lie down .
i’m not who you think i am .
i don’t know what you want me to say .
you’re not like anyone else i’ve ever met .
i feel like i’m going insane .
stop asking , you’re not going to like my answer .
i didn’t want you to see me any differently .
i wish i knew what to say to you .
don’t give me that look , you know what i mean .
you should be afraid .
do you still love me ?
i never thought i’d get this far .
the world doesn’t revolve around you .
i need you to give me some space .
i know what you’re doing , don’t play games .
you left me to die .
i’m beyond repentance .
when are you going to get it through your head ?
i missed you more than i thought i would .
i’m in love with you .
what do you need from me ?
i’ll kill them , just say the word .
[ name ] , what are you doing here ?
how can i help ?
you’re pathetic .
i need you to come pick me up .
where have you been ? it’s eleven o’clock .
i couldn’t live with myself if i let you get hurt .
i can’t just pretend it didn’t happen .
you’re a real piece of work .
do you remember how we first met ?
when did all of this fall apart ?
that’s not what i came here for .
i would do anything for you .
i don’t need you to hold my hand through this .
are you sure this is the right thing to do ?
can’t we try to pretend things are okay ?
what is THAT supposed to mean ?
you’re always late , what am i supposed to think ?
there’s nothing you can do to fix this .
you’re far too kind to me .
can we go now ? like , right now ?
i have to do this alone .
where’s your common sense ?
we aren’t supposed to be in here .
can you feel my heartbeat ?
i think i’ve seen you around before .
why are you acting weird ?
i have a really bad feeling .
i hate seeing you like this .
how am i supposed to react to that ?
what do you want most in the world ?
♫ jamie martin ... edits.
dynamics call !
CHARLIE GILLESPIE in Love Don’t Care by Debbie Gibson