Long Live the Sexual Deviants

Lets all just sit in a room and fuck burritos.I write imagines so request prompts you want me to write :)

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

Stephen Hawking’s life, as told by @TheScientist_SH.

1942-2018.

[mashiimellow]

Dirty Laundry by All Time Low

[folk-punk]

dentist: *shoots you* you’re bleeding b/c you dont floss

[bob-belcher]

[lagonegirl]

LMFAO

[autohaste]

this was a journey

[thee-renaissance-man]

I am Jay-Z

[thsoftestsound]

^^

[stilljewelss]

Look, as someone who is also in their 40’s, I can relate to Jay-Z. Just let me go home and rest, dammit.

[radio-charlie]

I’m not even in my fuckin 30s and this is how I feel half the time

[dynastylnoire]

In my thirties and the first one to leave all events unless I’m paid to be there,

[n0kiv]

I’m in my 20s and this is how I feel most of the time.

[kandyie]

^^^^^

[thedeadneighbourhood-deactivate]

dirty laundry x something’s gotta give

[jackbarakatsource]

[dankmemesreasonforliving]

[de-la-poussey-deactivated201812]

[barakat1412]

business email glossary

thanks in advance: get this done by the time i press "send"

thanks for your interest: why'd you have to bring this up

would you be so kind: fucking do it

best: i have never physically met you

all best: this conversation is over

all my best: i wish you would die

happy to help: this is the easiest thing in my inbox

i hope this helps: i've done all i'm willing to do

i did a bit of research: i googled it, because you're too lazy to

sorry to chase: answer my email

so sorry to chase: answer my FUCKING email

i am really sorry for being a pest but: i am LIVID that you are ignoring me

please contact my colleague: this isn't my problem

i'm copying in my colleague: this isn't my problem and i am thrilled about it

i'll check and get back to you: i might forget to

i'll let you know when i hear anything: i will forget to

can you check back with me in a week?: i'm hoping you will forget to

per our earlier conversation: i just yelled at you on the phone

great to chat just now: you just yelled at me on the phone

thanks!: i'm not mad at you

thanks!!: please don't be mad at me

thanks!!!: i'm crying at my desk

please advise: this might be your fault

kindly advise: this is entirely your fault

mind if i swing by?: i'm already in the elevator

can you confirm for me: you told me before and i deleted the email

sorry if that was unclear: i think you're an idiot

let me know if you need anything else: please never contact me again

Reblogging to add a direct quote that I used today -

Please respect my work process: just do it the way I told you to and stop arguing with me, I don't care what you think

[onefortheradios-deactivated2023]

@alexalltimelow: Taking on flies with a fly swatter and yelling “Avada Kedavra” with each killing strike. “The fly who lived… Come to die.”

[onefortheradios-deactivated2023]

“We’ve been a band for a long time, but we have no plans to stop. I think the next time we go in to start making music, there’s a very good chance that we’re going to want to push ourselves and keep challenging ourselves.”

[justanotherbandobsessedbitch-de]

[afterword]

i got the most relatable spam email

[dawsons-deactivated20170830]

good afternoon, i ship riassadee to the moon and back

[boredteen-deactivated20110916]

[thatsthat24]

What is your kink?

Literally any hint of affection.