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Noah didn’t want to make it obvious that he was frantically scanning Basil’s face for little ticks that would give him insight on what Basil was thinking, but he remained relatively neutral. Which wasn’t a surprise, but it didn’t give Noah much of an idea on what exactly Basil was thinking when Noah asked him about Valentines.
Although, to be fair, he mostly looked bored. He really could have anyone, Noah couldn’t help but think in awe. He seemed so disinterested in being in relationships, where as Noah couldn’t wait to really get involved with someone for the first time. It would be scary, because he would have to hide his accident but… maybe with time he would tell them. He hadn’t told anyone outside of who knew when it happened, and the thought of being so vulnerable was scary but… also something he couldn’t help but crave.
And then Basil was expressing his disbelief that Noah had never had a Valentine, and it was a touch flattering, and he was ready to say so, when Basil continued on to say that, of anyone, it would be Noah Basil would want. Of anyone here.
When there were so many amazing Foxes and Vixens. Some that had baggage, but weren’t all messed up under their clothes like Noah was. And maybe that casual admission would change if Basil really saw him, but at the moment, all he could really register was the fact that Basil had said that about Noah. Basil, who was way too cool to think of Noah as anything other than a friend, maybe even a good friend.
He felt his face heating and he cupped his own cheeks, unable to stop a huge flustered grin from splitting his face. “R-really? I… well, oh gosh, that’s so sweet, I don’t know what to say,” Noah said, his heart thumping so loud in his ears that he was sure Basil could hear it. “You really know how to make a guy feel special,” he said, trying for somewhat semi-suave and landing somewhere closer to painfully awkward as he ducked his head, shyly looking up at Basil through his lashes.
Unlike some people, Basil was particularly cool when it came to showing his emotions. He didn’t want people to know what he was feeling even on the best days Normally, Basil had an easier time with keeping his emotions to himself, there was just something about Noah that made it slightly more difficult to hide some of the emotions that he hid. He wasn’t sure that Noah could pick up on them still. His cool expression somehow still managed to confuse most people. He wished he could be as forthcoming with his own emotions as some people were, especially Noah. Basil wasn’t a mind reader, he knew better than to think that Noah liked him as more than a friend, but he did emote way more than Basil did.
Relationships were a bad idea for Basil right now. he didn’t have the time that some people had to dedicate his life to being with another person. When he wasn’t studying for his classes or practicing, he was sleeping. Noah seemed like the type to be clingy—and while Basil normally could handle that, he was sure that Noah only thought of him as a friend. Plus, right now Basil just couldn’t handle a relationship. There were a lot of other things he needed to worry about. And when it came to romance, he didn’t have the emotional capacity to be there for someone. Sometimes Noah made him want to try. Hell, every time they got close, Basil ran away. He’d keep doing that too.
He was painfully aware they weren’t alone. That one Vixen was still watching them. Who did they think they were fooling with their bright pink dress? Basil felt like Noah was just ignoring all the other people around them on purpose. He wasn’t ashamed of feeling this way. He just didn’t want anyone else around because this was a moment he wanted to share with just Noah. The Fox wished he’d taken Noah’s offer to go to Fox Tower because then at least they might be able to be alone. But a part of him had wanted them surrounded by other people—he wouldn’t be tempted to do anything stupid. Of course, he’d already said something stupid, so it wasn’t likely that he was bound to stop anytime soon.
Basil looked at Noah and suddenly felt awful. The Vixen deserved someone much better than him. He was so messed up and destructive. When there was something good in his life, the first thing he did was ruin it. Why would that be any different with Noah? And they were friends. He couldn’t ruin the one friendship he had at Palmetto. He hadn’t even wanted friends when he’d come here and Noah had bulldozed into his life with his strawberries and smiles. Now it was months later and all he wanted to do was kiss the boy in front of him, yet somehow remain detached from everything. Basil rubbed the back of his neck, attempting to keep his cool. “I…” he said, clearing his throat. A part of him really wished that he could just disappear in this moment, let himself feel something other than the detached feeling he always had. “But I’m no good for you. No matter how much you might think I am. And no matter how much I might care about you.” He practically whispered the last part, hoping that Noah didn’t hear.










