Rocks are Good

COVID19 is gay

[deanwinchcester-archive-deactiv]

reblog this with what your parents almost named you 

[beangrinder]

Ariel S. S.

Now its Sarah A. S.

[beangrinder]

I generally sleep sometime between 3am-11am rn. Somewhere there. But my girlfriend (who is an essential worker a whole state away) has been trying to get me “on her schedule”.

JOKES ON HER

I just called her at exactly 7:01 all excited to catch her before work. However, it is sunday and she was very grumpy being awoken on her day off.

I shall be using this as my future arguement.

@thequeenofwhores

[beangrinder]

At any given moment i am thinking one of these things.

1) i could climb that

2) fuck tHE BINARY

3) B R E E Z Y L E G H A I R

4) how is the interior both crocodile and alligator?

[beangrinder]

Coffee is too hot

Hands cold. Heart impatient

Ouch fucking hot bitch

[beangrinder]

This is Misfit Prophets (5.10c/d 3 pitch) on Prophesy Wall in Utah.

Imagine. Rocks. 🤤

For real though. I miss groping the good mothers jugs, fingering her crevices, and fisting those dirty cracks.

Tell me rock climbing isnt the gayest sport

[beangrinder]

Me: “Can we kiss real quick?”

*i kiss my baby*

Girlfriend on facetime: “i’m gonna dropkick your slut cat”

[beangrinder]

When she mad at u on text, making fun of you on snapchat, and dming u on tiktok

[sapphic-courtship-for-dummies]

My crush: *accidentally eats dry ice and burns her mouth*

Me, a morosexual: You’re so fucking stupid I love you

[sapphic-courtship-for-dummies]

My girlfriend: *accidentally sets her microwave to “defrost” when she’s trying to make popcorn*

Me, tearing my shirt off: What a dumbass

[beangrinder]

Me: *won’t put cold water in bath that is WAY too hot because it’ll “ruin the ratio”*

My girlfriend, tightening the strap: “you are burning your one brain cell”

@thequeenofwhores

[beangrinder]

Right after she hung up,

I wanted to call her again.