yellow hearts & sunflower veins

australia - taurus - infj - ravenclaw - small & queer. please ask me to tag any triggers; your safety and comfort is so important. i queue everything!! hi, i'm kaitie and i care about you with all my heart. and prohibition-era nyc gangsters. and napoleon bonaparte. and flowers.

[beannysiegel]

I'm sorry for sending the ask, I can't reply under the post itself. First of all, thank you for your input! And you made me wonder, why do you think Charlie would be bitter at all that Meyer took over his role. Wouldn't he want it to be Meyer above anyone else?

oh no, yeah, absolutely, that’s not what i meant at all 🧡 

when i say charlie may have been bitter that meyer took over his role i mean it in.... god for a writer i’m terrible at expressing my thoughts. uh. not bitter at meyer, but bitter at the circumstances that meant meyer even had to be in a position to step up - bitter that he was in exile, bitter that he was trapped, that he was on an allowance that was getting smaller and smaller with each passing year, that meyer now had much less time for this person he’d spent his whole life with, and who was his best friend, because he’d had to keep the mob in order upon charlie’s deportation and pick up the mantle (which, did meyer even want it? this guy who’d always advised discretion and preferred to play the part of the kingmaker in the shadows, the power behind the throne? ummmm); bitter that he was now the capo di tutti capi in name only, and even that recognition was a little tongue in cheek, a sly little faux-compliment from the younger generations who didn’t respect charlie like his contemporaries did, and intended to represent services rendered in the past rather than any contribution to the mob now. like charlie literally had nothing to do but sit around all day festering and thinking and seething and being hurt, because he was, god he was a sensitive lil mobster, which, y’know, fair enough. but not seething at meyer. not being hurt by meyer. just at the world. meyer was just as much caught up in it all as charlie was; he was also treading water, he was just a better swimmer. 

if there was any bitterness towards meyer personally, it would only have been the basic “he’s still making money while i’m stuck on this island screwing around and waiting to go home (i’m never going home”). and even that - i mean, yeah, that’s expected, that’s human, what he was enduring was not a nice thing and he would have had to be a saint not to feel a tiny bit salty towards his successor, even if it was his best friend - and charlie wasn’t a saint. but better his friend than some guy he didn’t know, or who hated him, or who he hated. better the one you know than the one you don’t (good job kaitie adapting that saying good job very smooth thank you kaitie). but i really don’t think charlie would have resented meyer as a person very much, if at all - just the circumstances. just the fact that this had happened at all. that it had to happen. and he absolutely would have wanted meyer to be the one to take his place, yeah. he loved him, and he knew he was incredibly smart, and he really was the only sensible choice, and charlie would have known that. i’m babbling now, sorry. i don’t think this is coming out at all like i mean it but yes: charlie hated the situation, he never hated meyer. that’s what i’m trying to say. why didn’t i just say that? whoo boy. 

and everything i’m saying i mean, please take it with a grain of salt haha! i haven’t read TLT since 2015, and i’ve been absent from discussions about meyer and charlie and the mafia in general for a fairly long time (even tho i still love them dearly), so my knowledge is rusty and kara (meyerlansky) and em (goatsandgangsters) are much more reliable sources. but yes!! hope that clears things up, have a lovely day/night 🧡🧡

[beannysiegel]

thomas barrow & the duke of crowborough––

a youthful dalliance; a few weeks of madness in a london season

for @goatsandgangsters and a companion piece to this (1911 vs. 1911; falling in love in the floral horror and decadence of a town house vs. falling in love amidst raw survival on the streets; a footman and a duke vs. a bloody-knuckled tempest and a small boy as quiet and watchful as the grave; the drunken, chandeliers-and-stolen-kisses sprawl of london society vs. the starving gore of the lower east side; broken hearts and spat goodbyes in a yorkshire estate vs. devotion and forged kingdoms in the waldorf astoria). 

[beannysiegel]

meyer lansky & charlie luciano––

if we meet each other in hell, it’s not hell

for @goatsandgangsters & @meyerlansky and a companion piece to this (1911 vs. 1911; falling in love in the floral horror and decadence of a town house vs. falling in love amidst raw survival on the streets; a footman and a duke vs. a bloody-knuckled tempest and a small boy as quiet and watchful as the grave; the drunken, chandeliers-and-stolen-kisses sprawl of london society vs. the starving gore of the lower east side; broken hearts and spat goodbyes in a yorkshire estate vs. devotion and forged kingdoms in the waldorf astoria). 

[beannysiegel]

something always rubbed me up the wrong way about all that “you have to stick around when a relationship gets tough!!!!! they aren’t easy!!!!! they’ll hurt and you have to be mature enough to get through it!!!!!! love is pain but if you really love them it’ll be okay!!!!” stuff

and i think it’s that.. people mistake abuse…. and genuine misery…. in a relationship for it just…… being a tough time that you have to get through??

like

your partner being stressed out about a job interview or being in mourning because someone died or the occasional fight or whatever it may be is one thing. that, that’s the shit you work through and support and love each other through. that’s in any relationship.

but sometimes, you look at someone and realise you aren’t in love with them anymore, or they aren’t right for you, or you fight just that bit too much, or you realise “oh. wait. this is abuse. i am controlled. i am scared. i am angry. i am hateful. i hate the person i am becoming and i hate this relationship and i hate them”.

and that??

that, my friends, is not fucking normal.

you don’t have to work through that. you don’t have to stick around for that. THAT is the mature decision to make.

like, idk if the people saying that have just never been in an abusive relationship before - in which case, you’re fucking lucky - but i just really hope the people reading it realise there’s a huge fucking difference

bye

[beannysiegel]

meyerlansky replied to your post “self care is asking your mum for a pen in a cafe and...”

what is a bastsman

it’s the player who hits the ball with the bat in cricket, think nothing of it, rid it from thou memory, he was just pissed because they’re called batsperson now and his apparently straight dick can only get hard for men

ALSO i cant be fucked making a whole separate post but that thing about meryl streep????? how about we...... okay wild suggestion but how about we, as a species, wait for it, what if we... hold men accountable for their actions and not immediately pin it on any nearby women in their lives with the sole purpose of once again pitting women against women 

it’s almost like people chant about internalised misogyny without recognising it in themselves 

it’s almost like that isn’t it 

whoa 

[beannysiegel]

self care is asking your mum for a pen in a cafe and scrawling FUCK YOU!!!!!!! across an article called fucking some dumb shit like "it's true... they want to get rid of men" (and i mean, youre not wrong buddy, youre not wrong) written by a douchebag fuckwit white middle aged white dude and the whooole article is just him being like "you know why kids nowadays are confused about their sexual identities???? because of the THEY pronoun, i HATE the they pronoun, the they pronoun PERSONALLY came INTO MY HOME and STOLE the baby tomatoes FROM RIGHT. OUT. OF . MY GARDen SALAD!!!!! IIIIII personally LIKE to be called a man because i am a MAN i am MANLY i have a WIFE and IIIIIII don't LIKE IT when i can't send emails starting with "hey ladies" i am an ENDANGERED SPECIES and ALSO also WHY aren't they called batsmen anymore???? WHY are ACTRESSES called ACTORS???? GENDERED TO iLets????????? I HAVVE A PENIS"

and anyway it felt fucking fantastic 

[beannysiegel]

why is there no “reblog this with what you used to imagine was running alongside your car when you were a kid” post

[beannysiegel]

kaitie omg kaitie i was on the train home today and i had music on and i was texting someone stuff and not paying attention to what i was listening to and then BAM!!!!!! DISTURBIA!!!!! (the actual one but s t i l l) ONLY THE AUDIO IS WAAAAAY LOUDER THAN WHAT I WAS JUST LISTENING TO and the volume and suddenness slapped me in the face with the sheer untamed force of 137 children singing off-key. r e L E A SE me

AKSDGOAUWSFGVSDGBSUFLBDASLDNaslknfdADs (I KEYSMASHED SO HARD MY LAPTOP DELETED IT IT JUST coduLTNT HANDle THE PURE EXUBERANCE) Oh my goooOOODDD REleaSE ME FROM THIS CUYRSE IM IN i M MMmMMMM STRU g GLING how amazing 

[beannysiegel]

me, through gritted teeth as i force my cheerfulness and good will upon this earth: my cv is fucking yellow choke on my joy and love you capitalist buffoons

[beannysiegel]

tumblr..... yall.... you preach about supporting women and then tear down literally every popular female celebrity once you get sick of them and they become "cringey" and then 10 years later youre still stanning these completely average, mundane male look-alikes who do nothing but occasionally be funny or some shit and theyre God's Gift To The Planet and every famous woman is trash, like. fucking run fast meryl streep because somehow, one day, tumblr is going to find fault with you 

 LIKE. there's that post circulating recently about jennifer lawrence and everyone is like I HOPE EMMA STONE IS NEXT and the new In-Crowd Joke is "liking halsey unironically" and just. shut up. like no one cares that jennifer lawrence just came out of an emotionally abusive relationship with a famous older director that has left her so psychologically scarred that she can't even go on the road to promote the film because it makes her sick?? okay, like a famous woman does a few things wrong, is rude to fans, acts LIKE A MAN, and she's the fucking devil - and i GET IT, emma stone works with a known disgusting sex offender, let him burn, but sinking your teeth into a woman who made a questionable career choice kinda goes against your “protect and support women” philosophy 

 yall 

 are 

 hypocrites

[beannysiegel]

IM GOIN FOR MY DRIVERS LEARNERS TEST TODAY wish me luck i should have done it when i was 16 but im damN WELL DOIN IT NOW LMAO

[beannysiegel]

[beannysiegel]

Now the sky is grey But honestly, it doesn’t hurt me  I learned to find my way On the path and no returnin'  Everything I’ve left behind I’m reminded every time I meet your eyes We were so bold and brave Baby, can you imagine?

[beannysiegel]

yo it makes me so sad to see like 14 year olds who are so proud to be aphobes and theyre telling inclusionists to fucking kill themselves and that they're, and i quote, "counting down the days until [inclusionist] OP dies" like........ youre 14. youre so young. fill yourself with light and love, not this... hate. like i hate to be all "when i was 14!!!!" but when i was 14 i was just starting to work out my sexuality and kind of tentatively educate myself on feminism and other issues (and look! when i was that age, i had my own internalised prejudices to work through - i made fun of these ~radical social justice warriors~, i was the first to protest “not all men!!”; but i worked through that, i became a better, more educated, more loving person) so i'm not gonna say that kids shouldn't be involved in politics, because my god of course we should be encouraging the youth to become aware and to be more educated and just all round empathetic!! it's fantastic - kids are the future! but when you set about dampening your childhood with toxic hate and proudly calling yourself a label that ends in "phobe", like.... please. it's not healthy, little ones. you deserve better. we deserve better. the world deserves better than having another person adding to the darkness.

[the-bookshop]

Source.

[aetherane-deactivated20180822]

“He’s no monster, Gaston; you are!”

[natureandbeauty]