Bears Stealing Shit

Bears stealing shit.

[bearsstealingshit]

Vine by Carpool Pizza Unicorn

[fuckyeahmarriedwithchildren]

[bearsstealingshit]

Suck my dick.

[bearsstealingshit]

Stole a grip of ‘70s pornstar bush and now I’m hiding it for the winter.

[bearsstealingshit]

Sorry, Gilligan. Me and my raccoon girlfriend are going to convert this into an interspecies sex swing.

[bearsstealingshit]

This shit better make its own gravy or I’ll be back to kick your cheap ass.

[bearsstealingshit]

A little wide, but I can definitely rub my dick on this.

[bearsstealingshit]

Guess what? Now I’m taking your fucking...sapling? Yeah, that’s right! Now you’ve gotta plant a new one, bitch!

[bearsstealingshit]

Thought you could hide your Cool Ranch from me? You’re fucking tripping bro!

[bearsstealingshit]

After i snake your picnic basket, I’m rolling this piece of shit off a cliff because fuck you.

[bearsstealingshit]

Stealin’ yo pussay

[bearsstealingshit]

Gonna mate all over yr shitty vinyl upholstery.

[bearsstealingshit]

Let’s see: anal beads, dental dam, nipple clamps, flavored lube...this is some fuckin’ camping trip you’ve got planned.

[bearsstealingshit]

Laugh it up

I hope a bear steals your iphone.

[bearsstealingshit]

Hope you yuppy pricks insured your quadcopter 'cuz I’m about to gank it.

[bearsstealingshit]

Gonna sell this shit to Donkey Kong, let him flatten some wops with it.

[bearsstealingshit]

Yeah, this blog seems all adorable and silly until some bear steals your hard-earned shit.

[bearsstealingshit]

These deck chairs will look positively divine in the foyer of our winter cave. Also, fuck you.