I took 11 grams of shrooms trip report °~
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the day was 3 days ago on 5/20 (Saturday) and it was our day off together. we woke up & the manager at the hotel was calling at like 10:00 in the morning so we couldn't sleep in on our day off. we got in the car and drove to the store for drinks or cigarettes I guess. we passed a truck that was wrecked in a ditch. we kept driving passed soooo many damn yard mushrooms and I was seeing them all over the side of the road.
I got the gut feeling that I should go by the spot that the universe has been giving me signs to go to, just to see if any could be there. the cow pastures in Alabama are so rich and they can produce magic mushrooms that I've been wanting to try all year. noted, I've never gone picking for mushrooms on someone's cow pasture before. Saturday I became one of those people you hear stories about trespassing on cow farmers to get their psychedelic mushrooms. I'll just say that it's totally the fate of the universe because there were an abundance of them there! exactly where my gut feeling told me they were. I'm seriously talking about beautiful, fresh, totally perfect cubensis mushrooms. I also got lucky & got some psycilocibe caerulescens growing beside the cubensis ones. the magic of this day was dreamy and unreal and absolutely out of this world. I'm going to keep going back to describing it as out of this world because that's the only words that comes close.
and the natural outcome of that is we ended up picking them and eating them & tripping all weekend. these are the words I'm going to try to use to describe the experience:
-------Day 1 trip------- (Saturday, 5/20/2023)
the dream and the VHS tape
the day we found them. I started myself off with eating one of the cubes pins, but this pin was super big and probably weighed 2 grams or something. I felt it coming pretty fast in my stomach mainly at first, and then my vision became really distorted and everything was waving. there were tracers everywhere on everything like the tree branches and every single leaf.
everything had movement behind every movement like shadowing almost. mom left to go to work and I went to the trampoline to lay down because my stomach needed me to. I watched all the branches and leaves for awhile with Zach. I couldn't stop looking at him and thinking he's so beautiful. then I noticed in my vision that it was like a 90's VHS tape. kind of like an old camera flickering in my vision. I would laugh and then I wouldn't be able to stop. & then he was talking about Friday (night before all of this) and it played back in my head like a 90's VHS tape. and I remember him standing by the car at the hotel and it was like an old movie. like watching and remembering an old movie. for some odd reason I couldn't get that out of my head.
that's when things started getting super trippy for me because I was imagining me & him at the hotel in a dreamy way that didn't seem real but it was a VHS tape movie. the VHS movie is a reuccuring theme throughout all of this experience for some reason I don't know how to explain. that's the only way I can explain how it felt. it was a dreamy place and the honda was a dreamy car. especially when I imagined or saw him standing in front of it. it was really trippy seeing him in such a dreamy way & the car is the object that solidifies him being real and incredibly dreamy at the same time.
but yea, we were basically just having deep conversations and silly ones & laughing a lot. that was the strongest 2 grams I ever ate. we had to go inside because it started sprinkling rain. I was thinking so many cool things that I can't even remember. oh yea and every time I would yawn, tears would out come behind it and my eyes were watering really bad. I kept having to assure Zach that I'm not crying or sad and I was okay.
day one was really intense and amazing! Day 2 was just insane madness and I'll write about it too. the next time I take that many shrooms I definitely don't need to be around that many people, preferably just with Zach when we can be completely alone.
------------Day 2 trip (05/21/2023)-------
him, the car, and the hotel
day 2 was the wildest ride ever because I started off eating 2 kinda big but small mushrooms, nothing too crazy. Morgan came over and Zach was putting a blue hood latch on the honda. I could feel them kicking in when I was sitting in the back of Morgan's van and before that when he first got there. he set a blanket in the back of it to make it comfortable for me.
then I decided to eat 2 more when I was sitting in his van just to see what would happen. let me just say, not much time had passed; maybe 35 or 45 minutes had passed, since I had already eaten the first 2. so I ate 2 fresh ones , and then 2 more cracker dry ones. no exact measurements on the grams, I'm guessing around 5 or something. after that, I smoked a bong & it launched me straight into a full blown psychede trip. it felt like my inner child came out and I could just let go and giggle at every little silly thing or thought I had. then the same thing repeated, the same thing from before when I was sitting in the back of the van; and I could see Zach standing in front of the car, in front of me in the driveway, then I imagined him standing in front of it at the hotel. & he was telling the story about Friday night (before all of this even happened) and he was talking about the guys at the hotel that disrespected him. & it was a the same dreamy feeling from before and it was really tripping me out. it was the feeling of him, the car, and the hotel, and it was just a dream and a VHS memory, and unbelievable. it felt unreal in those moments. still have no idea what any of it means. anyways, basically my inner child came out for 4 hours and it was a super cool experience.
when Morgan left, I felt his energy leave because we're twins, and he may have been part of the reason for the inner child. I had a nice talk with Zach when they left to go to the store too. the trip came down though.
a few hours later and after eating a few slices of pizza, later that night, me and Zach scaled out 11 grams each and it was so hard to eat all of them but I got them down and held them down the entire time, I didn't vomit. they were actually measured exactly this time. oh & when I was looking at Zach holding 2 shroom caps, they looked wicked, i got that dreamy feeling again seeing that, and it seems to me now, that I have seen shrooms before in a past life or dream life or something. it seemed familiar in an unreal, dream like way. a VHS tape played in my head of Zach and mushrooms like that.
anyways, it's 9:00 at night and I'm getting sleepy so I'm going to write about the most remarkable things quickly. So I got the shrooms down and I held them down the entire time. I started tripping so hard that moving became more difficult and it was hard to even form a thought or form a sentence, let alone have any kind of conversation. I felt like I reverted back to a child like mindset somehow and I couldn't get myself out of it but i was ok with it so I didn't think too much about it. I told myself that it would be okay if I felt like this forever and that being a child felt so good.
at one point, I opened my eyes and every single thing was bright orange. everything, the walls, it all had like a glowing orange filter over it; and it stayed like that for a couple of minutes at least. i was literally looking through my vision as an old orange filter on a VHS tape. then it was like I blinked it back to normal because I paid too much attention to it, because it didn't happen again after that.
that was super wild to me, the whole room glowing, and seeing everything orange, and seeing Zach himself glowing through this orange VHS filter through my eyes. but Zach was telling me that its because of the orange light, but to me I think, that it's only a slight orange hue; everything glowed orange for a few minutes, and I blinked it off my eyes. my eyes and my mind were totally playing tricks on me. I mean, I definitely realized then that everything wasn't truly orange as I was seeing it but I definitely, truly was seeing it that way.
and Zach told me to turn the light off, and that was ok because I had light from my phone. it was dark and my phone's radiant light was glowing and bright and I was seeing color normally again, I think. Definitely still more vibrant color but it wasn't the orange VHS tape anymore.
note that I can't truly find the right words to actually explain the entire experience I was having, because it was out of this world, and there are no words.
I took a heroic dose of mushrooms and no words I ever have can describe my experience. I can only put certain things into words.
mushrooms are totally different from acid in the way you see things and the distortion of your vision is similar sometimes, but mushrooms are way more out of your control.
I'm remembering now that during one point in the night on this heroic dose, I could move but I didn't want to, and I just stayed still for so long. and I thought about stories people have told about the strongest strain of psychedelic mushroom; (psycilocibe azurescens) and how they told stories about feeling paralyzed by this mushroom on their trip.
------(continuing) 05/24/2023
and then I thought about how I was being so still and realizing that it's very possible to get paralyzed on your trip. I had never eaten that many mushrooms before and it was a heroic dose that I probably went overboard doing because I'm like 100 pounds. at moments it really could've seemed like I was paralyzed but I could move. I just told myself that if I feel paralyzed, I can relax & accept it, & accept that it would be over soon and I was going to be okay.
something else remarkable that happened was that i couldnt really say a comprehendable sentence, just random words and giggles for a while. and my voice went super soft and it felt like it would take too much strength to speak up or talk louder. I wanted quiet and peace. also on day 1's trip, I saw the rocks on the ground as an old movie. and my shirt was bright orange and all I could see was myself in the orange shirt in my reflection on the dream car. it was the perfect color shirt for me to be wearing that day. it's funny to think about that and then the orange VHS film on my vision on day 2. seeing myself in the reflections felt truly unreal, as if my sense of self was not with me.
it took me 2 days to write this and it's still not even half of the experience I had that night. the experience I had was unworldly, and dreamy, and truly psychedelic. I spoke like a totally different person and I loved feeling like a child again.
how do I feel now? (5/24/2023)
i feel those amazing after glow effects of the psycilocibyn mushroom. I went back to work after that weekend with more energy, a more positive attitude, and a new outlook on the hotel I work at. I always get such amazing clarity of mind after I trip on shrooms and I'm sober again, I'm in love with that so much💖😭
