Alternatives for Self-Harm
Alternatives for when youāre feeling angry or restless:
Scribble on photos of people in magazines
Viciously stab an orange
Throw an apple/pair of socks against the wall
Have a pillow fight with the wall
Scream very loudly
Tear apart newspapers, photos, or magazines
Go to the gym, dance, exercise
Listen to music and sing along loudly
Draw a picture of what is making you angry
Beat up a stuffed animal
Pop bubble wrap
Pop balloons
Splatter paint
Scribble on a piece of paper until the whole page is black
Filling a piece of paper with drawing cross hatches
Throw darts at a dartboard
Go for a run
Write your feelings on paper then rip it up
Use stress relievers
Build a fort of pillows and then destroy it
Throw ice cubes at the bathtub wall, at a tree, etc.
Get out a fine tooth comb and vigorously brush the fur of a stuffed animal (but use gentle vigor)
Slash an empty plastic soda bottle or a piece of heavy cardboard or an old short or sock
Make a soft cloth doll to represent the things you are angry at; cut and tear it instead of yourself
Flatten aluminum cans for recycling, seeing how fast you can go
On a sketch or photo of yourself, mark in red ink what you want to do. Cut and tear the picture
Break sticks
Cut up fruits
Make yourself as comfortable as possible
Stomp around in heavy shoes
Play handball or tennis
Yell at what you are breaking and tell it why you are angry, hurt, upset, etc.
Buy a cheap plate and decorate it with markers, stickers, cut outs from magazines, words, images, what ever that expresses your pain and sadness and when youāre done, smash it. (Please be careful when doing it)
Alternatives that will give you a sensation (other than pain) without harming yourself:
Hold ice in your hands, against your arm, or on your mouth
Run your hands under freezing cold water
Snap a rubber band or hair band against your wrist
Drip hot candle wax on your skin (please be careful doing this)
Clap your hands until it sting
Wax your legs
Drink freezing cold water
Splash your face with cold water
Put PVA/Elmerās glue on your hands then peel it off
Massage where you want to hurt yourself
Take a hot shower/bath
Draw in red ink lines where you want to self harm
Take a hot or cold shower/bath
Jump up and down to get some sensation in your feet
Write or paint on yourself
Arm wrestle with someone
Bite into a hot pepper or chew a piece of ginger root
Rub liniment under your nose
Rub lotion on yourself
Put tiger balm on the place(s) you want to cut. (Tiger balm is a muscle relaxant cream that induces a tingly sensation. You can find it in most health food stores and vitamin stores).
Alternatives that will distract you or take up time:
Say āIāll self-harm in fifteen minutes if I still want toā and keep going for periods of fifteen minutes until the urge fades
Colour your hair
Count up to ten getting louder until youāre screaming
Sing on the karaoke machine
Complete something youāve been putting off
Take up a new hobby
Make a cup of tea
Tell and laugh at jokes
Play solitaire
Count up to 500 or 1000
Surf the net
Make as many words out of your full name as possible
Count ceiling tiles or lights
Search ridiculous things on the web
Colour coordinate your wardrobeĀ
Play with toys, such as a slinky or play-doh
Go to the park and play on the swings or jungle gym
Call someone
Go āpeople watchingā
Carry safe, rather than sharp, things in your pockets
Do school work
Play a musical instrumentĀ
Watch tv or a movie
Paint your nails
Alphabetize your CDs or books or movies
Cook
Make origami to occupy your hands
Doodle on sheets of people
Dress up or try on clothes
Play computer games or painting programs, such as photoshopĀ
Write out lyrics to your favourite song
Play a sport
Read a book/magazine
Do a crosswordĀ
Draw a comic strip
Make a chain link out of paper counting the hours or days youāve been self-harm free using pretty coloured paper
Knit, sew, or make a necklace
Make āscoobiesā - braid pieces of plastic or lace, to keep your hands busy
Buy a plant and take care of it
Hunt for things on eBay or Amazon
Browse for forums
Go shopping
Memorize a poem with meaning
Learn to swear in another language
Look up words in a dictionary
Play hide-and-seek
Go outside and watch the cloudsĀ
Plan a party
Find out if any concerts will be in your area
Make your own dance routineĀ
Trace your hand on a piece of paper; on your thumb, write something you like to look at; on your index finger, write something you like to touch; on your middle finger, write your favourite scent; on your ring finger, write something you like the taste of; on your pinky finger, write something you like to listen to; on your palm, write something you like about yourself
Plan regular activities for your most difficult time of day
Finish homework before itās dueĀ
Take a break from mental processing
Notice black and white thinking
Get out on your own, get away from the stress
Go on YouTubeĀ
Make a scrapbook
Colour in a picture or colouring book
Make a phone list of people you can call for support allow yourself to use it
Pay attention to your breathing (breathe slowly, in through your nose, and out your mouth)
Pay attention to the rhythmic motions of your body (walking, stretching, etc.)
Learn HALT signals (hungry, angry, lonely, tired)
Choose a random object, like a paper clip, and try to list 30 different uses for it
Pick a subject and research it on the web - alternatively, pick something to research and then keep clicking on links, trying to get as far away from the original topic as you can
Take a small step towards a goal you have
Alternatives that are completely bizarre, at least youāll have a laugh:
Crawl on all fours and bark like a dog or another animal
Run around outside screaming
Laugh for no reason whatsoever
Make funny faces in a mirror
Without turning orange, self-tan
Pluck your eyebrows
Put faces on apples, oranges, or other sorts of food
Go to the zoo and name all of the animals
Colour on the walls
Blow bubbles
Pull weeds in the garden Ā
Alternatives for when youāre feeling guilty, sad, or lonely:Ā
Congratulate yourself on each minute you go without self-harmingĀ
Draw or paintĀ
Look at the sky Instead of punishing yourself by self-harming, punish yourself by not self-harmingĀ
Call a friend and ask for companyĀ
But a cuddly toyĀ
Give someone a hug with a smileĀ
Put a face mask onĀ
Watch a favourite TV show or movieĀ
Eat something ridiculously sweetĀ
Remember a happy moment and relive it for a while in your headĀ
Treat yourself to some chocolateĀ
Try to imagine the future and plan things you want to doĀ
Look at things that are special to youĀ
Compliment someone elseĀ
Make sculpturesĀ
Watch fishĀ
Play with a petĀ
Have or give a massageĀ
Imagine yourself living in a perfect home and describe it in your mind If youāre religious, read the bible or prayĀ
Light a candle and watch the flame (be careful)Ā
Go chat in the chat roomĀ
Let yourself to cry; crying is a healthy release of emotionĀ
Accept a gift from a friendĀ
Carry tokens to remind you of peaceful comforting things/peopleĀ
Take a hot bath with bath oil or bubblesĀ
Curl up under a comforter with hot cocoa and a good bookĀ
Make affirmation tapes inside you that are good, kind, gentle (sometimes you can do this by writing down the negative thoughts and then physically re-writing them into positive messages)Ā
Make a tray of special treats and tuck yourself into bed with it and watch tv or readĀ
Ā Alternatives for when youāre feeling panicky or scared:Ā
āSee, hear, and feelā - 5 things, then 4, then 3, and countdown to one which will make you focus on your surroundings and sill calm you downĀ
Listen to soothing music; have a CD with motivational songs that you can listen toĀ
Meditate or do yogaĀ
Name all your soft toys Hyper focus on somethingĀ
Do a āreality check listā - write down all the things you can list about where you are now (i.e It is the 9th of November 2015, Iām in a room and everything is going to be alright) With permission, give someone a hugĀ
Drink herbal teaĀ
Crunch iceĀ
Hug a treeĀ
Go for a walk if itās safe to do soĀ
Feel your pulse to prove youāre aliveĀ
Go outside and attempt to catch butterflies or lizardsĀ
Put your feet firmly on the floorĀ
Accept where you are in the process.Ā
Beating yourself up only makes it worseĀ
Touch something familiar/safeĀ
Leave the room 4/7/8 breathing - breathe in for 4 seconds, hold for 7 seconds, and breathe out for 8 seconds.Ā
Repeat until you feel calm.Ā
Alternatives that will hopefully make you think twice about harming yourself:Ā
Think about how you donāt want scarsĀ
Ā Treat yourself nicelyĀ
Remember that you donāt have to hurt yourself just because youāre thinking about self-harmĀ
Create a safe place to goĀ
Acknowledge that self-harm is harmful behaviourĀ
Repeat to yourself āI donāt deserve to be hurtā even if you donāt believe itĀ
Remember that you always have the choice not to cut: itās up to you what to doĀ
Think about how you may feel guilty after self-harmingĀ
Remind yourself that the urge to self-harm is impulsive: you will only feel like cutting for short bursts of timeĀ
Avoid temptationĀ
Get your friends to make you friendship bracelets; wear them around your wrists to remind you of them when you want to cutĀ
Be with other peopleĀ
Make your own list of things to do instead of self-harmĀ
Make a list of your positive character traitsĀ
Be nice to your family, who in return, will hopefully be nice to youĀ
Put a band-aid on the area where youād like to self-harmĀ
Recognize and acknowledge the choices you have NOWĀ
Pay attention to the changes needed to make you feel safeĀ
Ā Notice āchoicesā vs ādilemmas"Ā
Lose the āshould-could-have toā words. Try āwhat if"Ā
Kiss the places you want to SH or kiss the places you have healing wounds. It can be a reminder that you care about yourself and that you donāt want thisĀ
Choose your way of thinking, try to resist following old thinking patternsĀ
The Butterfly project - draw a butterfly on the place(s) that you would self-harm and if the butterfly fades without self-harming, it means it has lived and flown away, giving a sense of achievement. Whereas if you do self-harm with the butterfly there; you will have to wash it off, therefore ākilling itā. You can start again by drawing a new one on. You can name the butterfly after someone you love.Ā
Write the name of a loved one [a friend, family member, or anyone else who cares about you] and write their name where you want to self-harm. When you go to self-harm remember how much they care and wouldnāt want you to harm yourself.Ā
Think about what you would say to a friend who was struggling with the same things you are and try to be a good friend to yourself.Ā
Make a bracelet out of duct tape, and put a line on it ever day (or ant period of time) you go without self-harm. When itās full of lines, take it off and make a chain out of all the bracelets and hang it up somewhere where you can be reminded of your great progressĀ
Alternatives that give the illusion of seeing something similar to blood:
Draw on yourself with a red pen or body paintĀ
Cover yourself with plasters where you want to cutĀ
Give yourself a henna or fake tattooĀ
Make āwoundsā with makeup, like lipstickĀ
Take a small bottle of liquid red food colouring and warm it slightly by dripping it into a cup of hot water for a few minutes. Uncap the bottle and press itās tip against the place you want to cut. Draw the bottle in a cutting motion while squeezing it slightly to let the food colour trickle out.Ā
Draw on the areas you want to cut using ice that youāve made my dropping six or seven drops of red food colour into each of the ice cube tray wellsĀ
Paint yourself with red tempera paintĀ
āCutā your skin with nail polish (it feels cold but itās hard to get off)Ā
Alternatives to help you sort through your feelings:Ā
Phone a friend and talk to themĀ
Make a collage of how you feelĀ
Negotiate with yourselfĀ
Identify what if hurting you do bad that you need to express it in this way Write your feelings in a diaryĀ
Free write (write down whatever youāre thinking at the moment, even if it doesnāt make sense)Ā
Make lists of everything, such as blessings, in your lifeĀ
Make a notebook of song lyrics that you can relate toĀ
Call a hotlineĀ
Write a letter to someone telling them how you feel (but donāt send it if you decide not to)Ā
Start a grateful journal where everyday you write down three: good things that happened/things that you accomplished/are grateful for/made you smile.Ā
Make sure the journal is strictly for positive things. Then when you feel down, you can go back and look at it.
Hotlines:
Suicide Hotlines Worldwide
Suicide (and other support) Hotlines UK
Suicide (and other support) Hotlines USA
Sexual Abuse & Domestic Violence Hotlines (USA)
Child Sexual Abuse & Domestic Violence Hotlines (USA
More:
Feeling Sad?Ā - Masterpost of Links/Websites/Games to visit when feeling sad
100 Reasons NOT to Commit Suicide
More Help/Tips/Advice























