BEOWULFED!

YOU ARE NOW IN THE PRESENCE OF THE GREATEST WRESTLER NEW MERIDIAN HAS EVER SEEN! YOU'RE WELCOME. apartment b-5. armed with a plastic...folding chair.

[gunchakus-blog]

 Acrobatics and speed was the component which he heavily relied on as his monkey heritage had allowed him to make most of a monkey’s agility. While he might’ve lost his bo staff as well (which had been replaced with a partially broken wooden once), he too lost the main component of power. 

   ❝By the way you describe wrestlin’, it seems pretty interestin’! Looking good? Well I always look good so I can check that off the list! There’s more? Nice.❞

[beowulfed]

The good thing was that their weapons were fairly easy to replace. Had one of New Meridian’s other citizens been here, and had they lost one of their parasites or living weapons...well that’d be another story. Still, just ANY chair wasn’t good enough for Beowulf. It had to be THE chair. And he’d find her.

“Har har, real funny kid. Shit ain’t all ‘bout looks, but it sure is a big part of it. You gotta make sure you keep the crowd hyped, cause without their support, y’ain’t getting anywhere!”

[beowulfed]

yourpromdate

you should check your tag on my blog, posted your starter a while back!

[gunchakus-blog]

   All he could provide was a mere light show, for now at least. Making duplicates of yourself and not being able to do anything doesn’t really help as it’s completely useless. Sun had no intentions of fighting in someone during his stay, or for now at least. 

   ❝Wrestlin’? Isn’t that the thing when people tackle each other? Oh, so it is another chair. Well, I’unno anythin’ about wrestlin’ so I’d say why not? Bashin’ people’s faces with a chair sounds pretty fun to me.❞

[beowulfed]

Beowulf still had his brute strength, which was something, but it still wasn’t enough. The Hurting had no special powers, no boosts to his skills or anything like that, but it was so important to his gimmick that without it, he felt like he’d lost an arm. Sorta like Grendel did.

“You got it, kid. Tacklin’, grapplin’, bashin’ faces, it’s all a part of the job, really. And looking good while you do it of course.  There’s a lot more to it than just that though!”

[lawfulbringer-blog]

“Those scrawny drumsticks of yours couldn’t liberate a city much less an entire planet. You telling me you’re actually worth my time?”

Those were some difficult shoes to fill, you know, with her being the lady behind one Handsome Jack; her standards practically leapt for the moon.

But she was getting a kick out of this guy’s reaction. The way he snapped and huffed reminded her all too much of the bandits lined up with her crosshairs.

[beowulfed]

“What!”

Beowulf’s voice raised to a shrill screech in response to the woman’s words. Scrawny drumsticks? Like hell! He ate scrawny drumsticks for breakfast! And big ones too! And what the hell was she talking about liberating a city or a planet. Sheesh.

“Look, I ain’t tryin’ to liberate cities or planets, I’m tryin’ t’boost my career, and that’s that. Someone sure is up in the clouds and delusional as hell if you can’t appreciate these guns.”

[gunchakus-blog]

 Anything that could turn into a sword would be awesome, or for a weapon to turn into anything for gods sake. Sun would probably just stick with his staff, and his gunchaku if he had them. The ideal of being a professional wrestler sounded somewhat appealing to him. The mere prospect of jumping onto people for fun sounded rather fun. 

   ❝Trainin’ for what, exactly? ‘N ‘The Hurting’? Is that some kind of nickname you gave yourself or somethin’? But by the sounds of it… you’re talkin’ about another chair, aren’t ‘ya?❞

[beowulfed]

Well at least he still had his strength. Maybe someday he’d get The Hurting back, but for now he had to make do with what he had. They could take away his chair, his Gigan arm, but they couldn’t take away his sick biceps and triceps.

“Wrestlin’ of course. The Hurting’s IS my chair, I use it when I fight. It’s probably illegal, but I dunno, there ain’t ever been a ref that told me I couldn’t use it.”

[toontowntroublemaker-blog]

“…I’m fourteen, ya dumb sack ‘a shit! I’m a goddamn tween!”

“Anywho–need I remind ya which one’a youse got a crazy popular show what’s been goin’ strong fer ages, and which ‘a you is a two-bit chump whose hype died out like, a decade ago? Seriously, izzat a gut I see? Yer makin’ me sad just lookin’ at ya, dude.”

[beowulfed]

“Fourteen, eight, same difference.”

Beowulf shrugged. He didn’t really care how old she was.

“Uh, newsflash, kid, I’m totally a huge and popular actor alongside her! The Wulfamania mighta died out for a bit, but now it’s back with a vengeance!”

[gunchakus-blog]

 All that Sun saw was an aluminium chair being swung around by a ridiculously large and built male who for some reason had taken a liking to chairs. Maybe it was a special chair which could turn into a sword or something, who knows. People in this city were capable of anything at this point.  

   His head cocked to the side and nodded hesitantly, ❝riiiiiiight… trainin’. Sorry, I just didn’t think…❞ his sentence trailing off to allow time for the monkey to point at the chair, ❝that would be your trainin’ partner. A chair, huh.❞

[beowulfed]

Dude, if his chair could turn into a sword, that’d be awesome, but then he’d probably never use it. Beowulf had never realized what an idiot he probably looked like, but he was a professional wrestler, so that kind of came with the job by now.

“Uh yeah, this is training. Them shitty scientists took away The Hurting, and now I’m stuck with this hunk of junk. It just doesn’t make the same impact. It’s trash.”

[lawfulbringer-blog]

beowulfed

[lawfulbringer-blog]

“I’ve seen bigger guns before.” Just putting that out there. 

Nisha does tip her hat, though, commending the man on his considerable efforts. It’s just that Torgue’s got such a strong hold on the market and the guy probably works out when he isn’t blowing things up; his literal guns pack a wallop, too.

[beowulfed]

“Eh, what?”

Beowulf’s head whirled around to face the source of the voice behind him, only to find...a babe. But her babely status would have to wait, because of the shit she was slinging.

“I ain’t got any guns,” Beowulf frowned as he raised a hand to scratch at the back of his neck. It was only when he caught sight of his huge bicep that he realized what she meant.

“What! Like hell you have!”

[toontowntroublemaker-blog]

“Puh-lease! Annie’s th’ only one carryin’ that trainwreck y’call a collab-abomination!”

“But by aaaaaall means, Fuzzy–go ahead an’ bite my shiny metal ass! See what happens!”

[beowulfed]

“Annie would be nothin’ without me! She needs me!”

“...wait, aren’t you like 8 years old or somethin’? No thanks, I’ll pass on that one.”

[oniihanzo-deactivated20180106]

Please look at this fucking nerd

[yatterman-deactivated20221021]

“WOAH YOU GO, BIG GUY!”

[beowulfed]

i know beowulf acts like a child but he’s literally 37 years old

[gunchakus-blog]

While Sun isn’t particularly the type of person to judge another, he could safely say that this individual was a rather interesting fellow. The faunus didn’t want to intrude on whatever the other male was doing as he seemed to be pretty occupied. Though who couldn’t be curious in the slightest to know what they had happened to be doing with the chair?

   This giving a reason for him to cautiously approach the broader other, arms folded atop of his chest. ❝Err… do ‘ya need some help there?❞ It truly was a mystery on how an aluminium chair ended up with a person such as him. 

[beowulfed]

Another couple swings, and Beowulf could tell that the frame of the chair was made of a different material, some metal weaker than aluminum. As much as this chair LOOKED like The Hurting, it was nothing like The Hurting. Hardly a suitable replacement. 

He barely noticed as some blonde kid walked up to him, asking him if he needed help. Beowulf huffed, lowering the chair and hugging it to his chest.

“Uh, no, don’t you know a person training and practicing when ya see one?”

[beowulfed]

yourpromdate

Night had fallen on Beowulf’s first day in Hive City, and he needed a drink. After enough wandering, he’d managed to find a nice bar, but some digging in his pockets showed that he had absolutely no money.

Well. There was one way to get it. He leaned his chair against the wall outside the door, rolled his shoulders and did some stretches, then cupped his hands around his mouth.

“HEY, COME AN’ GET IT! LINE FOR AUTOGRAPHS STARTS HERE! $5 A POP!”

[toontowntroublemaker-blog]

Oh, lovely–he’s in cahoots with th’ windbag.

“Yeah? Well, boo-hoo! Whaddaya gonna do, cry about it? Y’gotta earn yer good ratin’s, buddy–y’ever think ‘a hirin’, y’know, a writer?”

[beowulfed]

“Show’s got good ratings! It’s got me and Annie of the goddamn Stars in it!”

“You’re th’one that wouldn’t know talent if it bit ya in the ass!”

[beowulfed]

oldmastershifu

“Whoa, did someone drop their stuffed animal?”

Beowulf had merely been minding his own business when he saw a furry little thing, just stationary on the ground. Without a second thought, he bent down to pick it up, only to let out a yell when it moved, dropping it in a matter of seconds.

“WHAT THE HELL!”

[beowulfed]

yourpromdate said: hey man you said party w/ u and i’m all about partyin????

Let’s see we literally got

hair witch

monkey gijinka

bobo’s bizarre adventure

small sensei

dante edgy edition