"let your love light shine"

var a=new Date,b=a.getUTCHours();if(0==a.getUTCMonth()&&2012==a.getUTCFullYear()&&((18==a.getUTCDate()&&13<=b)||(19==a.getUTCDate()&&0>=b)))window.location="http://sopastrike.com/strike"; I'm Bethany. 19 year old college student with a major in social work and a minor in Biblical studies. I can’t get my hands on enough books. I like sipping (actually chugging, not to sound un-lady like) down some coffee, conversation, exploring, worshiping and dreaming of my wedding day and a missions to Africa, not entirely too sure which comes first. All I want to be is a disciple and a servant, honoring my Father with all I can.

[bethanyhb-blog]

It's about that time again. Time to make a new tumblr.  This always happens when I feel a change coming.  It's been nice, you guys.  

[amourdemariage]

[bethanyhb-blog]

1. Someone who will make me want to grow and be closer to Christ. Who unintentionally betters me.

[bethanyhb-blog]

It's really a bittersweet feeling to be humbled. It's both relieving and embarrassing to have the mud wiped from your eyes and realize you were the fool, stumbling around in circles. But then you know what to do next and what to change.

[bethanyhb-blog]

Could a garden come up from this ground, at all? You make beautiful things. You make beautiful things out of the dust. You make beautiful things. You make beautiful things out of us.

[hisstorythroughmine]

[bethanyhb-blog]

The other day I skipped through a couple of songs that reminded me of him and then him. My friend told me a story about her boyfriend, which made me think of him. Earlier I said something that he used always tell me. I just scrolled past a picture of a couple at a park and I thought of the park we went to, only that one time. Whenever I read the quote about the stars, I think of him, and sitting by the river at night for a week straight. And then randomly I wonder how he's doing with that new girl. And every time I think of the ocean, you know I think of you. It's like all these guys have tiny pieces of my heart. And it's not that I miss them or want to be where they are, I just wonder how they're doing. They probably don't know that I say a little prayer for each one... no matter how odd may it sound that I pray for each guy that took a piece of my heart and made me who I am. Whether they hurt me, or I hurt them, I pray that God keeps pursuing them and they go running after Him.

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[wellhelloyellow]

sem título by daиiél liиdström on Flickr.

[bethanyhb-blog]

Now that I have figured out my fall semester, all I can think about is what to do with my summer.

[bethanyhb-blog]

Last night I shared a small bit of my testimony with some friends. A friend said he could tell that I had come from a rough past. When I asked if it was because I was a little guarded, he said "Mostly because there's a sparkle in your eye, pure joy. But it's covering some pain behind it." That meant so much to me. 

[bethanyhb-blog]

How do You do it? How do you see everything and plan that it'll intertwine so beautifully? You weave strings of my life together so gracefully.

[bethanyhb-blog]

A lot has changed over the past week. I'm looking back now and realizing I was thinking some really ugly and selfish things. I kept reminding myself that God was with me everywhere I went, but I was missing the point. God brought me to this school and this town, not for my own good, but for His own will. I'm growing very close to two little ladies here who I've begun praying with, asking for accountability and keeping eachother encouraged. Last night we went to a FOCUS prayer group at the big state school in town. It was a combination of all the universities in Springfield, Christian or secular. We came together and prayed. We prayed so desperately that God would consume our hearts and burn so bright that it's undeniable who we're chasing after.

I'm learning that God wants us to stretch, to grow, to be put into uncomfortable situations. I'm learning that not only am I okay with that, that I want to strive to remain doing that. 

[bethanyhb-blog]

Even if your heart is overseas, doing missions.. You must first learn to share Jesus with your community. Sharing God with your neighbors, family members and co workers matters just as much, if not more.

[bethanyhb-blog]

After having lunch with Allie today and coffee with my RA tonight, I'm feeling fresh and renewed. Alive and confident. Moving to Evangel has been incredibly, incredibly difficult with leaving my support system of church girls, my comforts of a church that challenged me, a constant set of people I poured into and a routine of Jesus time laid out. I'm having to make new friends that are on fire, find a new church to get plugged into, find new people to encourage and juggle school work, while still finding time to put Jesus as my center- and keep myself centered.  My friends back home reminded me before I left, that this could be a season of loneliness. But in loneliness, when our comforts are stripped away, we learn to rely on Jesus and Jesus alone. Tonight, when I poured out my discouragements to Camille (my RA who has an inspiring relationship with Christ) she then reminded me of the same thing. My hindsight-bias kicked in (I'm using my psych terms- look at me!) and I felt like I knew this all along. Like a light bulb of "oh yeah" turned on inside my head. I remembered I need to keep Jesus as my focus and depend on only him. Not friendships. I need to also rely on him for everything. Not just my spiritual life, but my school work, my friendships, my future, finances- all of it! "Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God." -Psalm 20:7