“A woman in a room full of men is terrified, but a man in a room full of women is aroused”
Is it wrong for me to feel like this phrase is kinda… icky? Cause it feels like it’s doing that “men are always hornier than women” thing in addition to framing women as perpetual victims and men as perpetual aggressors. Plus, what kind of man/men and woman/women are we talking about? How do you think a Black man would feel in a room full of white women? A male rape/sexual assault victim whose perpetrators were women in a room full of women? What if the man is aroace?
This is toxic masculinity, andro-amatonormativity, and heteronormativity.
First of all, not all women are terrified in a room full of men. Not all women have androphobia (the psychiatric phobia of men), and also, this ignores factors like "Are the men strangers? Does the woman have social anxiety or trauma? How many men are there? What is the vibe of the men? Are there any racial, class, or disability disparities? Are all the men pericis, allo, monohet, monogamous, and just generally nonqueer?" and just stereotypes all the men as creeps.
Second of all, not all men are interested in women. Mono turians, diamoric men who aren't into women, and aspec men who aren't into women exist.
Third of all, even if a man is into women, that...doesn't mean they're into EVERY woman?? The room could be full of women they aren't interested in, or the man could be aroacespec (ie; demisexual) and need a deeper connection before experiencing such interest.
And fourth of all, men with gynephobia (the psychiatric phobia of women) exist. And nuances also exist, the questions come full circle, but in the other direction. "Are the women strangers? Does the man have social anxiety or trauma? How many women are there? What is the vibe of the women? Are there any racial, class, or disability disparities? Are all the women pericis, allo, monohet, monogamous, and just generally nonqueer?"
I am not a man, but I am intersex transmasc, and I have been sexually assaulted by men and women. Many others like me exist - victims of SA and violence whose perpetrators were women. If I were in a room full of women I do not know, I would be just as terrified as if I were in a room full of men I do not know. Victims of women exist, and we do not deserve to have our trauma undermined for the sake of gender essentialist bullshit.
