the elf in the café chapter 5
(I do not own this photo, nor do I know where it originated from. All credit goes to the artist.)
Summary: Never in his life, did he think going to a cafe and meeting a Harry Potter nerd could change his life. (I’m shit at summaries
A/N: H/N means his name, being that we don’t know what his actual name is currently
It was as if any and all their problems, fears, worries and life escaped them as the weeks went by. It felt as though it was just the two of them, that nobody but them were present when they were together.
Their touches grew longer, and closer, no longer fearing underneath every hug, every small brush of skin. The only thing they had yet to do, was kiss. They both loved where they were, not feeling the need to rush anything, truly captivated in one another and the bubble they created.
She lay against her couch reading a textbook, other hand writing down notes with little thought.
She tried to pay attention to the words, but her mind was elsewhere, being captured by him.
The sound of his laughter drifted through her mind, his head thrown back as a large smile takes over his entire face, tears streaming down from his eyes.
They had watched a film two nights prior, a comedy to be exact. They rarely watched anything but horror, growing tired of the monotonous of the scares. They wanted a laugh, to watch the film with tears in their eyes as they clutch their stomachs.
It was hard not to watch him as he nearly choked on his own breath, snorts coming out every few seconds as he tried catching his breath. It was, amazing. She hadn’t felt this happy in so long, feeling her heart full for the first time in over a year.
She thought she’d never experience happiness again after that fateful day, a shooting pain in her heart at the memory.
She almost felt guilty, having felt happiness again. She never thought it was possible, but his shy smile, dazzling brown eyes and beautiful personality warmed her broken heart, not completely healing it, but filling it with a warmth that she thought had long escaped completely. ‘If only he knew’ she thought.
Tears streamed from his eyes as he pulled his disheveled hair between his fingers, trying to stop the screaming thoughts from his brain.
He knew today was going to be a bad one from the moment he woke up, but he hoped by thinking of her the thoughts would dissipate. If anything, they made it worse.
It wasn’t that the thought of her made them hurt more, but the thought of them.
He always feared the day she would see him the way he saw himself. A broken, sad, shell of a man. But she never looked at him with pity or annoyance. Always a look of love and happiness. She looked at him like he wasn't a damaged man, but a whole, amazing person. A person he sadly wasn’t. And he feared the day she’d realize it.
He sat in the shower, clothes still on as he hugged his knees to his chest.
The water wasn’t running, just sitting there as he tried not to let his mind consume him. His heart grew heavy as he thought of her, her smile making his chest burn in pain.
It was heartbreaking, to feel like she’s slipping away when he rationally knows she isn’t. He can tell himself that it’s just his brain doing this, that what he’s telling himself, isn’t real. But he can’t shake the every so draining and painful thoughts screaming through his brain.
He finally managed to get out of the bath, tears still falling from his eyes. He stopped making any noise, now only silent tears indicating any emotion in him.
He looked up at the mirror, and instantly wished he hadn’t. He never likes looking into it on a good day, let alone when his face is red from insenant crying, eyes bloodshot and fat tears still tracking down his reddened cheeks. Why would she want to be with this? Why him? He’s nothing but a broken, shy, drop out who’s only thing he’s got going for him is his deep voice that causes more pain than anything positive he could think. And he can’t even make himself known for fear of everything he’s built to come falling down!
His face momentarily changed to anger before he smashes his fist into the mirror, the shards instantly imbedding into his hand as he yells out in pain. He rips his hand from it, instant burning pain consuming his entire hand as blood drips from it down his arm. “Fuck!” He yells, panic setting in as the pain doubles.
He doesn’t think as he dials her number, tears falling from his eyes as he frantically tells her what he’s done and the sound of her panicked voice crushing his heart further. She promises to be there fast, mumbling apologizes multiple times, each one being answered with her calming voice saying it’s okay.
Her heart beats out of her chest as she runs down the long hallway, tears collecting in her eyes the closer she gets to his door. She managed to grab the first aid kit in her bathroom before she left, knowing he probably wouldn’t have anything to help.
She bursts through the door, having been given a key a few days prior in case of emergency.
“H/N!” She yells, hearing nothing back as her heart sinks.
She sees the light from the bathroom is on, running as fast as she can to it. She slowly opens it, trying not to startle him. A tear falling down her face when she sees him. He sat facing the floor, bloody hand in his lap as she sees him shaking from crying. “Hey hey hey, look at me hun.” She soothes, crouching down and holding onto his cheek.
He looks into her eyes, seeing tears collecting as she tries blinking them away. “Everything’s gonna be alright I promise. I’m right here, I’m not mad, I’m not gonna hurt you, I’m here to help you okay hun?” She says, making his heart skip slightly. She had no trace of anger or disgust in her face or tone, just purely love and understanding.
He slowly gives her his hand, leaning his head against the wall as he tries to calm his shaking body.
She slowly removes each shard of glass, cleaning each wound with unpost care and a touch so delicate, he couldn’t believe how soft she was being.
He finally was broken from his trance when she wrapped his hand in gauze, looking down and seeing all the wads of bloodied tissues around them. A new wave of tears fell from his eyes, lowering his head again as to hopefully not let her see. But she was smart, and instantly wrapped her arms around his neck.
He wrapped his arms around her tightly, pulling her onto his lap.
She ran her hands through his hair as she straddled his lap, tears falling from her eyes as she shook in her arms, violently crying into her chest. Her heart burned in sheer pain as his muffled yells shook through her, each one making another fat tear to fall from her eyes. “It’s okay hun, it’s okay, I’m right here and I’m not leaving.” She says, trying to mask her crying in her tone. “Why? Why don’t you just leave? You’re better off that way.” He cries, making her heart ring in pain. Is that what’s been going on? Why he hurt himself today?
She pulls away from him, holding his face in her hands as she runs her thumbs along his cheeks. “I don’t want to, I want to stay here, with you. I don’t care what your brain tells you about yourself H/N. I want you to listen to me when I say this, whatever your brain tells you, I do not see. I see an amazing, caring, beautiful man who has a heart as beautiful as the morning sun on a clever sky. You mean so much to me, and I’d be the dumbest person alive if I left you. I swear on my life H/N, I mean every word.”
For the first time that day, he smiled. A true smile through his tears as he heard her words of admiration. It’s like each word she spoke, it wove through him like a ribbon, coating every inch of his heart and soul. He no longer heard the screams of his brain, only her angelic words floating through like fresh water.
He wrapped his arms back around her, hugging her close as she ran her hands down his back, and for the first time that day, he was at peace.
Her eyes opened slowly, a smile coating her face when she felt the weight of his body atop hers.
They had moved from the bathroom floor to the couch, holding onto him as she lulled him to sleep with a hum, a hand running through his hair.
She looked at the clock on the wall, seeing the arms read 3:47 in the morning. She didn’t even realize how long she had fallen asleep for, just letting her eyes close as she drifted to sleep some hours prior.
She looked down at him, a smile on her face. His face was, peaceful. No longer the strained jaw and furrowed brows he usually had. His lips lay in a pout, making her chuckle lightly.
She ran her finger lightly over his face, slowly running over his lips and down his jaw.
She reaches down, kissing his forehead lightly, smiling when he scoots closer, rubbing his face into her neck. Her eyes grow heavy again, closing them as she lets his rhythmic breathing lul her back to sleep.
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