Take Off Your Cool
Week 26 for me reeked of the lyrics that was poetically sung by Andre 3000 + Norah Jones in Take Off Your Cool. I was stripped of my gathered demeanor + still posture to tightened shoulders + clenched hands. I thought of more negative words this week than I have in years, combined. But why? I was challenged in a way that I was not rehearsed in. Being bit of a control freak, that is NOT okay. I was offended + felt cornered by every aspect in my life. From my faith to my character to my business endeavors to my personal relationships... Everything. I postponed deadlines, meetings + even sleep that was much needed. But it was all because of TWO things: my feelings + one of my most under-used words: no. I mentally wrote myself essays of reasons why I felt a certain way + why no was the best answer but verbalized excuses + compromises of what was rendered to me in the form of opportunity + a bandwagon to those I call partners + collaborators + associates + friends. I was handed mirrors throughout the week that showed me the depths of my insecurity of being alone. Winning alone. Failing alone. Being recognized alone. Being complimented alone. Heck... Just alone. For someone that is deemed such an individual, either I've been lied to or I'm the liar. I told someone early in the week that I grabbed my balls BUT I ended the week saying while my face buried in my hands, I let them go at some point. This song, Take Off Your Cool, is less than three minutes long + less than fifty words. Even with the skill, resources + audience of the celestial, lyrical pair, they chose to release a simple, melodic, hum-worthy tune... One that reminds me of my favorite color blue + far less than my personality color, red. As I admire those that are relaxed + unbothered by externals, this week I wont allow for my cool to be taken from me but instead, I'll take the lead + choose when to take it off.