Hello, I've been recently been questioning myself and I like boys a lot more than girls but more recently I've started to look at girls more often and like I don't see myself getting with girls and also marrying one but I look at them from afar. But I want to get with a man and marry one someday I'm so confused rn. I've been through this "phase" before and now it's coming back again please help!
Hello!
If this is a recurring thing, and you find yourself attracted to women occasionally, it could be that you're not entirely monosexual! It doesn't have to change anything though, if you're more than happy just staying with men and it doesn't really bother you that much, then that's fine!
It can be confusing I know, but sometimes it doesn't really change much, you're just aware of it, and for some people that's enough :)
Oh, I like this!
There's so many more ways to see a colour.. There's so many shades and gradients and.. Whatever those things are that art people know about!
hi! so im 14 and i think im bi, but i dont rlly know for sure. i mean, i think i like boys AND girls and when i think abt the present, i can see myself being happy w a girl. but when i think abt the future, i can only imagine myself w a boy, if that makes sense. my friends are rlly supportive, especially my gay friend, and they ve been saying that maybe im bi w preferences in boys, but idk what to think. could i be straight and this whole "liking girls" thing is just a phase?
Hello!
It's normal to be confused, it's a very confusing thing! If you're currently unsure but you think you might be bisexual but you don't want to call yourself bisexual just yet, which is fine! You could use the term 'questioning', it's for people who aren't sure right now but they're working on it!
It might be the case it's 'just a phase', sometimes that happens, but that's okay too! It's part of learning who you are and there's no shame in that.
Things will be okay, and I'm so glad you have supportive friends! It makes a lot of difference.
There is an ancient story I'd like to share with you all, something passed down from bisexual to bisexual in an endless, unbroken line... The line now comes to you. What you do with this story is your decision.
Eons ago, before the world was carved by borders and maps, there existed a radiant empire. Its true name is lost to the slow drift of language, but let us call it Aethel-Vera—the Great Kingdom of the Dual Hearts. It was our ancestral cradle, the birthplace of all those whose spirits were too vast to be bound to a single shore.
In this golden realm, every citizen shared a rare and beautiful gift: a heart that beat to a dual rhythm, capable of loving both the fierce warmth of the sun and the silver mystery of the moon. They were ruled by a legendary sovereign, Queen Orianne—whom the old songs simply call the Sovereign of the Two Horizons. Her reign was an age of music, art, and open gates, where love was not a boundary to cross, but an endless sea to navigate.
But no empire can outrun the turning of the ages. When the shadows of decay began to creep over the marble towers of Aethel-Vera, Queen Orianne ascended her high balcony. Looking out over her people, she declared:
"The stone of this city may crumble to dust, but the magic of our blood shall never be extinguished!"
She commanded her people to disperse across the oceans and mountains, carrying the spark of the Dual Hearts to every corner of the mortal world.
To this day, none can say what became of the Sovereign of the Two Horizons, or which silent ruins hold the bones of our lost capital. But we, who love without boundaries, still carry the secret lineage of that golden age. We are the survivors of Aethel-Vera.
...Well, okay, no, not really. But if we can't be occasionally theatrical, what's the point?
How do you figure out your sexuality??? Im 14 & im starting to think im bisexual??? Im so confused honestly. How am i supposed to deal with this & figure everything out?? Please helpp
Hello!
First of all, you need to take a breath and calm down, it's okay to be confused, it's not an emergency that needs to be addressed urgently or else something bad will happen, you have lots of time and you should be kind and patient with yourself, as you would be to anyone else.
Figuring out your sexuality can take a while and sometimes it's just small steps until you wake up one day and everything sort of clicks into place, it will happen sooner or later! Until then, remember that it's normal, you're okay and whatever happens you're a human deserving of happiness, if you're LGBT or not!
Don't rush things, it will only make you unwell and cause more stress for you, just let things develop at their own pace and all shall become clear.
I'm feeling a little bit like an imposter. I'm a bi 22 yr old woman and before last year, I was too scared to be in a relationship with anyone. I had flirtations with guys and gals, but I could never make the next step. Until I met my current boyfriend. He's the loml and I could never see myself with anyone else. But...I feel like bc I never went further with a girl, I missed out on my queerness? Idk if that makes sense. I'm wishing I wasn't so scared before bc I wanted to be in relationships with different girls before I met my boyfriend. And now I don't feel as queer as I did before I met him? Any advice?
Hello!
It's not uncommon for people to feel like they're a 'fake', but it's important to remember that your sexuality isn't defined by who you're with, you can be as queer as a duck at the checkout of a supermarket and still have a boyfriend, I know how it feels to have those 'what-if' moments, what if I did this, or that.. But we can't change the past, we can only live in the present and do our best to find happiness within it, it sounds like you're in a wonderful relationship that brings you happiness! That's beautiful! And it in no way takes away from your queerness, you're just a queer woman who happened to find that kind of relationship with a man and that's okay!
Now that I'm in my 30s, I know! I'm shockingly handsome and young looking, but that's another matter.. Ahem..
I think, for the younger people here, I'm probably more of an older brother, rapidly moving towards father-figure.. Time just keeps ticking on, but that just means I've learned a bit more since I've been around longer, and these are some lessons I'd like to pass down to younger people, and maybe remind older people of them too!
1.) As a human being, you have the right to be treated with respect, people don't need to agree with you, but they do have to be respectful of you, failure to do so is a failure on THEIR part, and not yours.
2.) Your sexuality is ultimately something that is a part of you, much like your heritage or culture, if you wouldn't accept someone being dismissive or erasing your heritage or culture then don't accept them doing the same to your sexuality.
3.) Life is precious and can sometimes last well into eighty-something earth-years! Though it's a long time for us, it's also quite a short time when you think about it.. Don't allow your own fears to stop you living the life you want to live, there's not enough time to live it unhappily or falsely! Unless of course, you have to lie to be safe, then always lie.. I give you permission.
4.) It's a cliché, I know. But loving yourself is important! You will be the only person in your life that will be with you always, you'll never go anywhere or do anything without yourself being there. It might be hard to find love within yourself, I know.. But do try! You are worthy of the love of yourself, trust me!
When I was fourteen I didn't know everything,
But, I knew some things.
I knew that, if I let go of a pebble, it will descend to Earth,
I knew about gravity, it's certainty.
And I knew I liked men and I liked women.
When I was fourteen, there was some things I knew,
But, other things I didn't learn about till I aged.
I knew that hot and cold are the same thing, thermal energy,
We experience them as separate things, but they are part of the same.
And I knew I liked women and I liked men.
When I was fourteen I knew I didn't know things,
But, I knew a little.
I knew that space and time existed together,
I didn't know why, or how.. But I knew that it did.
And I knew I liked men and I liked women.
When I was fourteen, I didn't know what I know now,
But I knew what I felt, and how I felt it.
I knew that observation will change the outcome,
But that was too much, too big an idea.
And I knew I liked women and I liked men.
I've learned a lot since I was fourteen, I've seen things, read things, watched things and grown as the truths around me informed me, some things I believed to be true have turned out to not be so true and some things I never knew to be true have made themselves known to me.
You know, I've been thinking lately about how much we as humans just don't know, it's a huge part of being a sentient creature, being confronted by the unknown and the unknowable.
When it comes to sexuality, sometimes we just don't know, and that is okay! I know that we humans always need to seek out knowledge and we hate not knowing things, especially about ourselves, but I think it's important to remember that the first step in coming to know something is to find yourself not knowing.
I think, there's great liberty in not knowing, you have so much to explore and to consider, so much to experience! Not knowing can be in itself a wonderful way to feel free! Yes, you may be confused and I know confusion can be scary, I've been there.. But the horizon is beckoning and you're going to be okay.
There is a Latin phrase, it translates roughly to "through hardships, to the stars" and I think you're all headed to your own stars right now.
Some of you may remember that a while ago I decided I was pretty much done with this blog, I felt I had done all I could do and that essentially it would be just me repeating myself over and over again, but that was some time ago, and now I feel maybe.. I could be useful again!
It would be a honour if you would accept my return to aid you in your journey, whether it's in the early stages of confusion and fear or if you've been out as bi for years and just looking for a sense of acceptance, I'd like to be here.
I look forward to continuing where I left off, if you'd have me back!
I think I don't just speak for myself when I say that we love to have you back. There are so may things that don't really go right at the moment and every single source of light is needed and you, my friend are a firework for the bi's. You were one of the first blogs I followed when i first came here and I haven't left since. So with joy I am happy to say:
I have a proposal, no, calm down, I'm it's not a marriage proposal, we've been over this, I like you as a friend.. ahem, yes, well.. I propose we make an effort to adopt the rose as our symbolic flower, no, not because of it's romantic connection, but because of Shakespeare! He wrote in Romeo & Juliet that a rose by any other name would smell as sweet, meaning that regardless of what name you name it, the rose is still symbolic of beauty, love and tender affection and regardless of your surname, whether you're a Montague or a Capulet, or as I intend to use it, a male or a female, woman, man, person.. It doesn't matter, the rose no matter, is sweet.
I've set aside the.. more troubling things about the story of Romeo & Juliet, it's a very old story and the ideals of a relationship or what is and isn't considered okay has changed dramatically, so that's not what I want to focus on. Just the pretty roses will do.. And yes, Romeo was a fu-k boy, as we all know.
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