you only have 1 shot at a Happily Ever After

Fairy tale endings dont exist in real life, #depressed #suicide #TheEnd

[bjludy]

True Love.

Love is such a simple concept. Love is loosely used in today's society. It's often mistaken for lust. Love is so meaningless that you could tell anyone that you love them. True love though, is something powerful and unique. True love only happens once in a lifetime. True love isn't always easy; true love means apologizing even if it isn't your fault; it's loving your significant other even when they make it hard or seem impossible; it means being awake at 3 in the morning because they had a bad dream; it means being willing to put their needs/desires/wants before your own; true love is sacrifice. Yet ultimately everyone wants to attain true love; true love is what ends a story in "happily ever after. "

[pearliegirlie]

What’s it like?” “Depression?” “Yeah,” he replied. “It’s like having a nightmare, but being awake through it all. You know when the monsters start chasing you, and you try to run away, but you just can’t seem to run fast enough or far enough. Every direction you turn, a new monster appears. Or like, when you’re having one of those dreams where you’re falling, terrified you’ll hit the ground, but then you wake up, and you’re fine. Depression is a lot like that, except, I don’t wake up. I just keep running and falling. And one day, the monsters will take me or I’ll hit the ground. There’s just no waking up from this.

(via lebenfickt)

[alkoholimblut]

I’m used to it. I’m used to people leaving. I’m used to being all alone. I’m used to having no one. So just go, leave. I’m used to it anyway.

(via alkoholimblut)

[bjludy]

Fuck my mind. I hate my mind... my mind is where my deepest fears become reality. So vivid are the thoughts that come late at night... All of them worse than the one before.... All of them so bad because I can't get over myself... I hate my mind. I hate that I have insecurity in myself.... I hate that I can't just live life and not worry.... I want to kill my mind.... Yet the only way to kill ones mind is to kill ones self... To kill ones self means hurting others and once again my deepest fears are becoming reality in my mind.... Fuck my mind

[bjludy]

[bjludy]

I'm not saying I would commit suicide... But what I am saying is that if someone or something wanted to kill me I think I would invite them too.

[save-yourself-stay-alive]

I don’t have a problem. I am the problem.

(via saveyourselfstayalive2)

Me though....

[bjludy]

There was once a time when I was highly suicidal. It even reached a point one night where I had decided I wasn’t going to wake up; so I began to write my note. I was about half way done writing my note and getting things ready when my brother stirred in his sleep. My brother at the time shared a bedroom with me. Concerned that he was going to awaken fully and ask what I was doing I instantly stopped moving and held my breath; to my amazement he didn’t move but instead simply stated “Ben, I felt like I should remind you that you’re loved.” Immediately following his comment I heard his soft snores begin again. In that instance I could do nothing but cry. To this day I don’t believe my brother knows that he did that. I don’t believe he even remembers saying those words to me when I needed them most. The truly sad thing is that even after this experience I still have nights where all I want to do is move on to the next life. I still occasionally feel unloved and unwanted. Yes there are even nights when I contemplate what I should write in my note. Yet every time those thoughts come so does the phrase from my brother “Ben, I felt like I should remind you that you’re loved.” Truth is I am remembering that phrase tonight.

[imjust-a-girl]

[poems-and-words]

[poems-and-words]

Book of the day: Humans of New York by Brandon Stanton

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[tiredmess]

reasons to stay alive

1. discovering yourself (you are worth discovering) 2. how silly people get when they’re sleepy 3. sitting in hammocks 4. long hugs 5. going to the zoo 6. carving pumpkins 7. cute baby animals 8. kissing in the rain 9. singing 10. the smell of baking cookies 11. picnics 12. warm blankets when it’s cold 13. you are so loved 14. octobers 15. staying up all night and sleeping in 16. water balloon fights 17. making babies smile 18. movie marathons 19. foreign cities, languages, people & foods 20. those “this never leaves the room” moments 21. rainbows 22. you will be missed 23. drinking hot chocolate/coffee/tea 24. binge-watching a series 25. slow dances 26. you are never alone 27. meeting new people 28. traveling 29. watermelon in the summer 30. sunsets 31. naps 32. road trips 33. finally understanding what something means 34. late night phone calls 35. listening to rainstorms 36. cuddling 37. climbing trees 38. going for walks 39. doing crazy things with your best friends 40. getting married some day 41. kind comments from others 42. tears of joy 43. drawing 44. cartoons 45. laughing really hard 46. making other people happy 47. sleeping in 48. doing things that would make your parents angry if they knew 49. jumping in puddles 50. getting lost 51. flowers 52. you are needed warm showers 53. fireflies 54. undiscovered forests 55. art 56. really good books 57. finding love of all kinds 58. jumping really high on a trampoline 59. hugging 60. full moons 61. crunchy leaves 62. see yourself recover 63. concerts 64. stargazing 65. kisses 66. secrets and promises 67. autumn leaves 68. knowing all of the lyrics to a song 69. orgasms 70. the smell after rain 71. getting handwritten letters in the mail 72. halloween 73. clean sheets 74. the first snow of the winter 75. petting puppies 76. city lights 77. late night walks 78. building forts 79. smiling in the middle of a kiss 80. people care about you 81. you are important 82. bonfires 83. thunder storms 84. having kids if you want 85. getting hickies 86. sunrises 87. when a baby holds on to one of your fingers with its whole hand 88. going to comic con 89. kind strangers 90. bowties 91. tree houses 92. music 93. solo dance parties in your room 94. new video games 95. long drives 96. being awake when everyone else is asleep 97. eye sex 98. smiling at strangers 99. onesies 100. you could save someone’s life 101. the sky and it’s pretty colours 102. suspenders 103. walks on the beach 104. sitting on rooftops 105. paint fights 106. there will be a time you’ll see that you’re glad you didn’t do it 107. pillow fights 108. lying on grass and watching clouds 109. you matter 110. watching fireworks 111. graduating 112. snow cones 113. bay windows 114. silence that isn’t awkward 115. messy hair 116. when you start smiling and can’t stop

[damaged-]

Before I met you, I had never been so happy to call someone mine, and only mine. Before I kissed you, I had never got the feeling of getting so lost in a single kiss that left me craving more, like I do with yours. Before I held you, I had never felt more at home then I do wrapped in your arms. Before I looked at you, I had never fallen so in love with a single persons eyes, like the way yours light up my entire day. Before I met you, I didn’t think i’d make it this far..

I love you (via probablyalexandria)

[craved-deactivated20230908]

Please don’t expect me to always be good, kind and loving. There are times when I will be cold, thoughtless and hard to understand…

Sylvia Plath.  (via alterated)

[books-n-quotes]

To love is to be afraid. You are frightened, deathly terrified, that something will happen to those you love. Think of the possibilities. Does your heart clench with each thought? That, my friend, is love. And love enslaves us all, for you cannot have love without fear.

Marie Lu, The Young Elites (via books-n-quotes)

[queerlysad]

[bjludy]

Death is a simple sweet part of life. Not because of the actual death itself but because it brings family together. Many choose to focus on the death itself but I find it’s much more appropriate to focus on the journey leading up to it. God bless the souls that have lost their husband, father, brother, son, and grandfather this day

[bjludy]

"I am not asking you to be happy that I must go. I'm only asking that you turn the page, continue reading... and let the next story begin. And if anyone asks what became of me, you relate my life in all its wonder, and end it with a simple and modest "He died.""

Mr Magorium's wonder emporium