I AM @bk-ny - Tumblr Blog

daylight doesn’t need any saving. i do

sometimes im like…..what is the point of all this ??? and then i hang out with the people i love, and for a brief moment, i see

tinsnip

When we’re new to adulthood, it doesn’t immediately occur to all of us that you’re almost always allowed to leave a situation, because growing up we’re forced to stay in situations until someone dismisses us and/or takes us home, or if we do leave on our own accord there’s someone waiting at home to say “we don’t quit in this family!” Boring party? You can leave. You don’t like the lecture? You can walk out. New doctor not working out? You can end the appointment, you don’t need to wait for them to dismiss you. Bad date? You can just go home. Leaving a situation prematurely might have consequences, but unless you’re under arrest or serving prison time, it’s pretty much always allowed.

–commenter Allison @ askamanager

conspectusargosy

Hibiscus!

themotherofrevelation

“Almost every woman I have ever met has a secret belief that she is just on the edge of madness, that there is some deep, crazy part within her, that she must be on guard constantly against ‘losing control’ — of her temper, of her appetite, of her sexuality, of her feelings, of her ambition, of her secret fantasies, of her mind.”

— Elana Dykewomon, “Notes for a Magazine”

stlowens

Sylvia Plath, from The Unabridged Journals

themotherofrevelation

“For women, only one standard of female beauty is sanctioned: the girl. The great advantage men have is that our culture allows two standards of male beauty: the boy and the man. The beauty of a boy resembles the beauty of a girl. In both sexes it is a fragile kind of beauty and flourishes naturally only in the early part of the life-cycle. Happily, men are able to accept themselves under another standard of good looks — heavier, rougher, more thickly built. A man does not grieve when he loses the smooth, unlined, hairless skin of a boy. For he has only exchanged one form of attractiveness for another: the darker skin of a man’s face, roughened by daily shaving, showing the marks of emotion and the normal lines of age. There is no equivalent of this second standard for women. The single standard of beauty for women dictates that they must go on having clear skin. Every wrinkle, every line, every gray hair, is a defeat. No wonder that no boy minds becoming a man, while even the passage from girlhood to early womanhood is experienced by many women as their downfall, for all women are trained to continue wanting to look like girls.”

— Susan Sontag, “The Double Standard of Aging”

cafeinevitable-deactivated20220

Moondance Quilt by Dianne Browning

luneloving

how you program your mind when you’re at a low point is so impactful. resorting back to toxic patterns when you’re low is only strengthening those neural pathways and programming your mind to make those unhealthy choices or think those unhealthy thoughts every time you’re not feeling well. alternatively, trying your hardest to cope in a healthier way every time you’re feeling bad will strengthen those positive neural pathways, and as time goes on, it will become easier to make healthy choices and say no to toxic patterns. this of course isn’t to say that you should feel guilty if you relapse, it is not by any means easy to reprogram your brain and sometimes we relapse and that’s okay, so long as we’re trying our best to treat ourselves better.

iacatawam

The first “positive neural pathway” I developed was learning the importance of ‘be patient with yourself’. Within that concept I include being kind to yourself as part of that patience, as well to have something, some task/goal/aim, to be patient about. It is pretty much the foundation of how I am much less of a mess than I could be.

ijaazat

damn kinda not feeling it... thinking of bursting into tears

riptears

“I can never be all the people I want and live all the lives I want. I can never train myself in all the skills I want. And why do I want? I want to live and feel all the shades, tones and variations of mental and physical experience possible in my life."

The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath, Sylvia Plath

hyrude

when u wake up a little and are like “i know what would take this from a 10 to a 100” and u roll over and experience mind melting euphoria before u fall back asleep… best part of being alive. humans were made for beddy bye