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20. Pressure to Fit the Timeline

In society, it feels like an unspoken rule to meet deadlines. To follow the timeline that our parents and our grandparents, and the rest of our ancestors have walked. That we have to graduate by a certain age, get ahead in our careers, and then find the one and get married and have kids. While no one voices these things, to me, it has always been known. I am a year behind graduating compared to the people I graduated high school with, and because of this, I feel like I'm failing. I am reading a book that pointed this out; she and her husband got divorced, and she is now 35 and feels like she no longer fits on the timeline. Her friends are all happily married and have kids, and she is back to being single and wanting to restart her career. This book has made me realize that there really is no timeline. You can go back to college at 35 or any age. You can meet the love of your life and get married two weeks later. You can also choose not to get married or to not have kids. You don't have to fit the unspoken societal expectations that we are quietly pressured by. There is no timeline; whatever line you walk and work through is the right one. I'm not sure if this should fit into the portfolio, but I think it works for me because it's been a big concept in my life lately.

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19. Ozempic Craze

Hims & Hers' Super Bowl ad sparks backlash

To me, the Ozempic craze dwindles down to celebrities, influencers, and even everyday people who want to fit in with what the media and society deem as "desirable". Being skinny and thin is what the media and society have deemed as the social hierarchy. In Western society, thinness equals status; it represents discipline by being in control and desirability. Other things that go along with this are that wealthy people can afford Ozempic for aesthetic purposes, while diabetic patients might not be able to access it anymore. This craze is a mirror reflecting society's most uncomfortable truths: we value thinness over health, beauty over well-being, and conformity over individuality, especially when it comes to women. It is not just about the drug. It is about a system that communicates worth through bodies, and that system is built on gender, power, and control.

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18. Fighting Against Gender Norms When Raising Kids

Essential Makeup Tips for Moms Raising Boys | TikTok

I came across this TikTok, and I knew right away that I wanted to include it in my gender portfolio. We have talked about this numerous times in class, and it was really heartwarming to watch how this mother handled her son's curiosity. The caption says, "Imagine I deny his curiosity and miss out on this moment of connection just because of my rigid and baseless views of gender norms". It was handled well, and she did not shame him for asking questions about the makeup or experimenting with it. You can also tell that it is a healthy relationship because her son is comfortable enough to ask questions. This was encouraging to see that she didn't hold him back within the confines of gender norms by saying that makeup is only for girls and that he doesn't need to learn about it.

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17. Men vs Women Experiences at Night

The other night, I was at my friend's house downtown, and my dad asked me why I was there so late at night. He said that it is a bad part of town and that I should not be out so late. He also demanded that I be walked to my car (which my guy friends always do). While I don't know this for sure, I think that if he had a son, he would not say anything because the assumption that goes with a male is that they can protect themselves. Whereas I am a small, defenseless girl who needs protecting. While that is true, I am pretty weak, and I know I would not win in a fight or against a man, it is still discouraging to realize that that is the reality. Men don't typically worry about being in dangerous places at night because they can protect themselves and are often not targeted. Whereas women have to pay attention to their surroundings in sketchy areas and at night. It is instilled into us to not be distracted by our phones, to have pepper spray or a knife on us, and to lock our cars immediately when we get into them. We have a different experience and reality than men do. This is an experience that I have lived all of my life, and it really stood out to me the other night how normalized it has become.

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16. Sexism Against Gamer Girls

Gaming shouldnt be a place to harass without consequences. Do better. ... | TikTok

I came across this video on TikTok where a gamer girl says something innocent, and the guys on the game and headset attack and harass her. They say nasty and disrespectful things because she is a girl. They are often not taken seriously by male gamers, especially in competitive and hardcore gaming spaces. They are frequently questioned about their gaming knowledge, subjected to gatekeeping, and also talked over and dismissed. If they do get attention, most of the time it is unwanted sexual comments and being hit on or being hypersexualized. This behavior can push women and girls out of these spaces and force them to hide their identity by using a gender-neutral name and not speaking on the mic. It is not only disgusting but also frustrating that women are subjected to this kind of behavior all for wanting to do a hobby that they enjoy and are sometimes better at than males are.

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15. Britanee Nicole Books

Britanee Nicole is an author that I love. Her books are powerful at breaking gender norms and societal expectations because her characters challenge the traditional roles and expectations. The female main character is often independent and prioritizes their own growth, boundaries, and healing over cliche story lines where they are a poor damsel in distress in need of saving. The women often save themselves in these stories, with help from their friends and family, and sometimes their partners. They also break relationship norms by some of her books having polyamorous relationships, some date men way older, and some of them also have the men be the submissive partner in the bedroom. It is also a common theme in these books that the men take care of the kids, and it is a balanced relationship, and it doesn't entirely fall on the mother. The main characters have actual goals other than just their love life being their entire world. But these books are romance, and they do a fabulous job of breaking the norms with the men as well. The men in these books are not scared of being "simps," if you will. They grovel after their women and are obsessed with them and will do anything to make them happy. It is swoon-worthy for sure. If you can't tell already, I read a lot of romance books, but Britanee is one of my favorite authors because she steers away from the cliche storylines that give romance books a bad rep. She normalizes healthy communication, vulnerability, and breaking away from toxic cycles, which is a refreshing alternative to the stereotypical portrayals of love and gender dynamics found in a lot of media.

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14. Expectations Between Parents

This is yet another quote that I found in a book I was reading. For context, she is the PR person for the popular baseball team and puts out all of the fires. Her boss came to her and said that she would not be able to manage a newborn and traveling, basically telling her it would be better to quit. Whereas her boyfriend and baby daddy is a hockey player and not expected to give up his career. I like that the book points out that in society, we expect for a mom to give up her career to take care of children, it is never on the dad. It is expected that a mom take care of the kids and that goes along with the expectation that because a woman is able to have kids, she should, even if she doesn't want them.

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13. Coach's Quote

I stumbled across this on Facebook after we had our guest speakers who discussed women in sports. I also thought that it was fitting because I met Holly Rowe and was able to have a private Q&A with her and she was able to talk to me about her experience in sports and how she has had multiple experiences where men in the industry will promise her things if she gives them sexual favors in return. Men's and women's student athlete experiences are drastically different, whether you look at the judgment that they face or even the funding and societal expectations. Women are held to unrealistic expectations. If they wear something too revealing, mispronounce a word, or make one tiny mistake, they are harassed, and it is said that they don't belong in a "man's" field of sports. If a guy does that, it is laughed off or not even pointed out.

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12. Virginity Expectations

I came across this while reading and thought that it was fitting for my gender portfolio. Society has long constructed a set of expectations around virginity because it frames it as a symbol of purity and worth. This goes back decades upon decades with women getting sold off to their husbands, but only if they were virgins, and if they weren't, then they were "damaged goods". This book scene points out that penetrative sex being considered as losing your virginity is heteronormative thing. It doesn't account for non-straight people's relationships. This concept is reinforced through media, religion, and family structures, where it is seen as a prized possession. It is also different between boys and girls. For women, they should not sleep around otherwise, they are called multiple bad words and shamed. Whereas men are praised for "conquering" women and sleeping with a lot of them. This not only creates shame and guilt for women who are sexually active, but also a need to keep it a secret and not talk about it. Which can be dangerous and also isolating. I think that sex should be a much more discussed topic.

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11. Love on the Spectrum

I have not fully watched the show, but I have seen multiple clips about it on TikTok and have heard people talk about it. This show is a great representation of expanding what the idea of love "should" look like. The media often portrays relationships in a stereotypical way: a heterosexual couple navigating romance in a scripted or idealized way. This show differs from that and shows the reality of dating for people who express and experience love differently due to their neurodiversity. It also challenges gender norms because some of the women within the show are very assertive and take the lead in conversations, whereas that is typically a male trait. It also prioritizes communication and consent, and how important those things are. Overall, this show is a great piece of media to look at when it comes to gender norms and breaking outside those constraints.

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10. Dwarfism and Bodies in Hiearchy

Understanding Dwarfism: Common Misconceptions Explained | TikTok

While scrolling on TikTok Tok I stumbled across this video. Earlier in the semester, we discussed bodies in hierarchy and how able-bodied people are "better" by society's standards and hold higher power over disabled bodied people. Within this video, she shares her experiences that she has encountered in her life. It also touches on how, because she is a woman, it is assumed that she will want children, even though she knows that it is not something she wants for herself. She also talked about how she has to wear kids' shoes and how people invalidate her frustration with this because kids' shoes are cheaper. This whole video opens multiple topics for discussion that we had mentioned in class, and was a great example for my portfolio. It was also eye-opening to learn about a perspective I don't have experience with.

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9. Disney Side Kicks

The majority of Disney Princess Sidekicks are all males. I had this revelation when we discussed the topic in class, and I thought I would include it in my gender portfolio. It's always been an unspoken thing that Disney princesses are put through a lens where gender roles are both reflected and reinforced. This can be seen in early films like Cinderella, Snow White, and The Little Mermaid. These characters have the traditional feminine traits- beauty, nurturing qualities, and a reliance on male characters. Now, we have more recent movies such as Moana and even Frozen, where the animal sidekicks are still held by gender expectations. This could be interpreted that the male sidekicks fill the role of protector, guide, or comic relief, and also provide the princess a male companion that reinforces the woman's "need" for a male figure to guide and assist them. It really makes you question why Disney doesn't make the sidekicks female. It also gives me the mindset that a girl cannot be strong without having a guy or two backing her up, which is not how it should be. Very interesting and makes you question some things.

#disney #sidekick #genderroles

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8. Chappell Roan

Chappell is a great figure to look at for her theatrical style and how she defies traditional feminine stereotypes. She is powerful in the sense that she has a hyper-feminine aesthetic, but only on her own terms. She aligns with certain aspects of femininity, but she leans into an exaggerated form of it through bright colors, frilly dresses and dramatic makeup. Another thing about her that stands out to me is that she is not afraid to speak her mind and potentially be controversial, which goes against gender expectations and gender norms of women being obedient, submissive, quiet, and those expectations that are set by society. One incident that I think of was her telling off the paparazzi at a red-carpet event, which strongly goes against being a "submissive, quiet female". She is also a strong representation for the queer community and the drag community due to her stage presence and the personas that she puts on and the clothing/makeup that she wears. So, to me, she is a great person to put for my portfolio because she rejects traditional feminine stereotypes by being bold and eccentric, but she also embraces certain aspects of femininity and gender communication.

#music

#gendercommunication

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7. Pucking Around

This book is a hockey romance poly-relationship. To me, this can be related to gender communication because of the power dynamics, the actual relationship, and how it portrays gender roles, expectations, and dynamics between the characters. In reverse harmen books, the female is often described as strong, assertive and independent, which challenges traditional gender norms where women are expected to be submissive and demure. The way that the characters communicate reflects this shift in power dynamics. The men in this book are also very vulnerable, and there is even a part of the plot where two of the men have to face their real feelings and open up about them being bisexual, and the two of them then have a relationship, within the relationship. This also ties into the emotional expression aspect and how women are encouraged to be vulnerable, whereas it is not as encouraged for men. Throughout the book, the characters go through multiple struggles and the men within the book cry at multiple points in the story, which shows the diversity of the book plot. Overall, this book is a great way to analyze how these characters don't perform the typical gender norms, power dynamics or gender roles. Great book and I highly recommend if you are into hockey romance.

#puckingaround

#gendernorms

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6. Sephora Kids Phenomenon

The ‘Sephora kid’ trend shows tweens are psyched about skincare. But their overzealous approach is raising concerns | CNN Business

Tweens, the consumer group that’s outgrown the little kid stage but are not yet teenagers, are obsessed with skincare. Their curiosity for a

The "Sephora Kids" phenomenon happened a few months ago, possibly even last year, when younger kids started going and reining havoc in the stores. There were even incidences where people were painting "black face" but that is a whole other issue for another day. This problem to me stems from young girls seeing social media platforms and then having the impression that they need to do things like makeup to look "pretty enough" for boys or "feminine" enough. Makeup has been a way to express femininity for years, and now these young girls are getting the impression that they need it to be attractive and to appeal to men, in my eyes. It also reinforces how these gender expectations are being forced onto the younger generations. Gender expectations are imposed onto us from birth, and these are things like the clothes we wear, the activities we are in, and how we perform day-to-day interactions. So, if young girls are only seeing content where women/girls are putting on makeup, they are going to get the impression that that is the only way to be beautiful and attractive. This also creates early exposure to gender performance by wearing makeup, they are performing their gender the "right" way according to society's standards. This is something that I could talk about for ages but I am going to leave it at that.

#gender

#bodypolitics

#genderperformance

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5. Girl Dinner & Girl Math

What’s my girl dinner? #girldinner

Trends such as "Girl Dinner" and "Girl Math" are things that we don't consider are ways that our society is setting body politics. This includes bodies in hierarchies, which in this case is the "fat/skinny" body types and how skinny is the unsaid "better" and "preferred" body type set by society through these body politics. So, the idea around "Girl Dinner" is to eat less or smaller portions rather than the stereotype that men eat a lot of food and big portions. As for "Girl Math" is still a body politic because as girls, we are "not as smart" as men, so therefore we perform math differently. We don't really think about these things, but they operate as body rules and "common sense" because the idea makes sense to us due to the things our society teaches us and says are true.

#girldinner

#girlmath

#bodypolitics

#hiearchies

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4. If He Is Mean To You, He Likes You

Never Tell Her: "He's Mean Because He Likes You" | A Mighty Girl

This article can relate to something we discussed in class: growing up, you were told that if a boy is mean to you, it means that he likes you. This is an example that ties into the social learning theory and the four stages of learning. This part falls under the motivation part of the social learning theory. It also shows that young girls and boys absorb gendered communication patterns by observing interactions, receiving verbal reinforcement from adults and then performing those actions to make meaning and connections themselves.

#boysversesgirls

#meaningmaking

#sociallearningtheory

#gendercommunication