There were very few people in the world that Raxwel would bend, much less break, his rules for.Â
He made it clear in every business endevor, every personal interaction - the boundaries were there and they would not change. Either they were accepted and things moved forward, or they werenât and individuals went their own way. Such was the way of things.Â
Few people made him doubt the decision to hold fast to those rules, and he could count on one hand the number of times he had deviated from them - never on a spur of the moment decision and never with someone he didnât trust already.Â
And it was because of these decisions, that when he saw Renault for the first timeâŠwhen he was told who the boy wasâŠthere was no doubt in his mind that it was the truth.Â
Perhaps it was foolish. Perhaps it was foolhardy to lean on rules and boundaries and on a feeling heâd never name - not it when it would risk the fragile peace heâd found.Â
Perhaps it wasâŠbut that was fine. Heâd play the part of the fool a bit longer.
There were so many different words and phrases that he felt were often overused, to the point where their meaning had been diminished - miracle was one of them.
Everything seemed to be a miracle.Â
If one listened long enough to enough storiesâŠsat in enough taverns, one would think that miracles were commonplace.
â...and enemies were swarming. Truely horrific - it was a miracle I got out of there aliveâŠâ
â...hadnât rained for weeks it felt like, then outta no where - just when I was ready to give up hope - we finally got a bit of a reprieve. A miracle, Iâm tellinâ yaâŠâ
âThe guy came in and bought everything - which was just enough to cover exactly what we owed. Donât know what prayer earned us a miracle, but Iâll keep sayinâ it if it keeps workingâŠâ
A matter of perspective, perhaps - miracles in their own way for those individuals - but to him it wasnât the same.
A shift in weather patterns wasnât quite the same as the way events had to line up to lead to him getting a second chance. Not to him.
From a chance meeting in a tavern, to the business arrangement that had allowed for a more personal arrangement, to the vision in Westfall that had led to him searching for Hale and eventually meeting his son.
He may have missed the first five years of his life, but he had the opportunity to see him grow up, and that was something he never expected to have. Something he was never going to allow himself - not after Galen, not after Eliza.Â
The healing allowed by Renalut in the short time heâd been in his lifeâŠthat alone was truely a miracle.
He knew better than most that there were consequences for every choice.Â
Every actionâŠevery inactionâŠevery decision made or withheld.Â
Everything had a consequence.Â
So much of his time was spent dealing in information related to individuals who didnât want to face the reality of their choicesâŠtheir decisionsâŠtheir actionsâŠand yet for every hundred of those situationsâŠ
Raxwel blinked as he glanced across the yard to see Finn, tail wagging happily, chasing a giggling Renault between the trees under the watchful gaze of the boyâs mother.Â
Heâd meant for it to be a short visitâŠjust long enough to say hello as he and Finn had passed by on their way to a job, but the request to stay the evening from the little boy had been too much and Raxwel hadnât been able to say no.
So he found himself seated beneath an apple tree watching his worg and his son chase each other.Â
An improbable situation - one that was only possible because of a choice.
A choice made by him and the boyâs motherâŠhe glanced across the yard, his dark eyes meeting her green gaze as she settled down onto a nearby bench, making herself comfortable as her gaze broke away from Raxwelâs and focused on Renault once again, just in time for the boy to go barreling into Raxwelâs chest, at full speed.
âOof.â
âSorryâŠâ
ââSâŠokay.â With a grunt, and a bit more effort than he wanted to admit, Raxwel sat up, taking a moment to make sure the boy was safe. âAlright, no scrapes, no bruisesâŠdid you need something, Renault?â
âCan you come play now?â
He smiled, running a hand through the boyâs hair and giving it a quick tussle, much to his dismay.Â
âHey!âÂ
âTo answer your question. Yes, I can come play, but the hair is for trying to tackle me into a tree. Come on, RenâŠyouâre it.â
âHeeeey!â
Raxwel took off at a light jog, the boyâŠand Finn at his heels (the latter tackling him at odd intervals for good measure, the cheater).Â
Heâd made a choice that night, with Hale. A choice based on trust and instinctâŠand he was perfectly happy to live with the consequences.
Green, red, and gold decorations littering the streets. Excited children. Tired parents. Overly full taverns filled to the brim with patrons who were sharing details of their latest conquest, planning their next, lamenting their last, and just about anything in between with a bit more gusto than the average season. The plans had a bit more flair, the heartache a bit more despair, and the drinks didnât have any extra alcohol - but they mightâve cost a silver or two more.
It was the holiday season - a time when Raxwel found plenty of reasons to make himself scarce within the walls of Stormwind.
Most of the time they were work related reasons, a job would take him away for some extended period, and there were plenty of jobs to be had around the holidays. Nobles to track, information to gatherâŠpeople didnât stop being foolish because the decorations came out of storage. But this year the task that drew him away was of a moreâŠpersonal nature.
With a quiet sigh, Raxwel glanced up as he tucked the journal heâd been flipping through away into his bag, shifting his gaze to the well worn road leading through Elwynn Forest, Finn trotting along beside him.Â
There were people he met in the course of his work who left an impression. Those who he worked for who he hadâŠrecurring engagements with, some more physical, some more intimate, some a mixture of both. But often, when the contracts with those individuals ended, he knew why. There was an understanding, a reason, an end to the story that made sense.
Heâd also been working in the field long enough to know that some contracts simply ended, and there was no reason as to why. Sometimes people simply stopped showing up, a ship stopped coming into habor, requests stopped arrivingâŠbut that didnât keep him from wondering what happened. And if the person were important enough, that didnât keep him from asking the questions.
Not at first, of course. At first the concern was for privacy, not wanting to intrudeâŠbut after years of quiet, of walking the docks and checking ship names, of looking into the dark corners of taverns and wondering if each new voice to pop up might be hers, he couldnât help but wondering just where Hale Cress had gotten off to, and so he started to inquireâŠcarefully.
And those careful inquires had led him here, turning off the main road down a far less travelled path that he wouldâve missed entirely had he not been looking for it, the smell of an apple orchard hitting him almost immediately as he moved further and farther from the main path, Finn continuing along beside him, occasionally sniffing the air as the pair moved.Â
There hadnât been much information, only that she was âsettledâ - and they hadnât expanded much on why, to say he was curious was beyond an understatement.Â
Curious and anxious in equal measure. The last time heâd seen her had been a hasty, though enjoyable, evening in an inn in Dalaran, five years before. He ran a hand through his hair as the pair cautiously approached the house, glancing around for any signs of the woman he was searching for.
âHavenât seen you before.â an older voice came from above and a gentleman bored a gaze to Raxwel and his companion. It took a minute and a bit of a sigh before the man slowly made his way down from the ladder near the entrance.
âWould make sense, Iâve never been here before.â
The old man dusted off his hands and he gave his greying beard abit of a stroke, âThere.â He huffed having just seemingly done some work on a fixture above. The heavy lantern above simply swaying giving indication it had been touched recently but the single light within shone brightly.
âAnything I can do for you, Lad?â the elder man turned to regard Raxwel a little closer.
A quick click of the tongue brought Finn close to his side, as Raxwel tilted his head and he rested a hand on the bag at his side. âPerhaps. Iâm looking for somone, and maybe you can tell me if Iâm heading in the right direction. I was told they lived out this wayâŠan inch or two shorter than me, dark hair, striking green eyesâŠanyone matching that description live in the area, sir?â
His free hand was nudged gently by the end of Finnâs nose as the worg sat before the animal turned and sniffed the fair again, curiously.
âAy the Lady of the house.â The man thumbed over his shoulder to the large home, âI take care of a few things around the property, the name is Jack. I can get her if youâd like. If youâre looking to collect on taxes Iâm afraid youâre a bit early; well by at least a few weeks.â
That earned the older man a chuckle and an easy grin. âItâs a pleasure to meet you, Jack, but I can assure you, sir, Iâm not here to collect the taxes.â Raxwel turned his gaze towards the home with a long slow exhale. âIt seems the Lady of the house would be the one Iâm searching forâŠif you wouldnât mind getting her, thatâd be much appreciated. Just a visit from an old business partner.â
âItâs quite the property, she seems to have done quite well for herself.â He paused for a moment, tongue running across one of his canines. âIs there a Lord of the house, Jack?â
âIâm not quite certain. She never speaks of one and I have yet to see one.â he huffed out a laugh, hands hardworking past their prime wrung and then wiped into his slacks a few times before reaching for the doorknob, âA moment then, Lad.â
Jack had been gone for a beat of a few minutes. The rustle and sound of distant voices carried and even the chipper chuckle of the man Jack inside. The door crept open and a pair of deep-colored eyes bore past the door toward the stranger. A child, no older than maybe 5 or 6 curiously stared â for a moment almost daring to jolt out the door to pet the big dog that was with the man but it was his motherâs voice that broke him from that possibility.
âRen ââ The voice called and Hale placed a hand to the door, â-- careful now you have no idea who youâre opening the door for.â Her brow knit and the door opened further to welcome and see to whatever guest and âold business partnerâ had found her here â of all places.
âRaxwel.â she spoke upon setting eyes upon the familiar man. Well, as familiar as it had been for well over several years since she had last seen him.
Whatever heâd been expecting, a child wasnât it.Â
Raxwel heard Finnâs curious âyipâ and felt the worg stand and circle around him quickly before sniffing in the direction of the open door, but he didnât spare the animal a glance. He couldnât, his gaze was too focused on the boy in the door wayâŠuntil the familiar voice reached his ears and he managed to blink himself out of his momentary stupor.Â
âHello, Hale.â He took a small step forward, tapping on the top of Finnâs head - the worg quickly sitting down next to him, but not without a sad little huff. âItâs been quite some time, and itâs seems youâve done quite well for yourself since the last time I saw you. And it seems youâve a new companion as wellâŠwho is this young man?â His gaze moved to the boy for a moment, noting the color of the boyâs eyes before shifting his focus and meeting Haleâs gaze once again.
The door opened a little more and not by Haleâs doing, if anything the child had his way in bumping it a little more open each time before he squeezed out and hopped down the stairs towards the dog, â5 years and some change.â she confirmed, watching Renault make his way to the worg. A big âpuppyâ in the childâs eyes. Had it of been any other wolf, dog or otherwise Hale would have had more concern and even stopped the child but she had been around enough just enough to know of the temperament Finn kept.
âThis is Renault.â Hale tore her gaze from the child to Raxwel, âMy son.â she finally followed up with as if though it might not have been obvious. In truth the kiddo could have been anyone elseâs considering Hale wasnât someone most would consider to have redeeming qualities, let alone being someone to have a child. Certainly more than her sister.
Raxwelâs curious gaze followed the boy as he approached before shifting back over to the boyâs mother for a moment. âI suppose he would explain why the requests stopped coming. Priorities changed. An understandable shift.â
âHe looks just like Finn!â Renault exclaimed and Haleâs mouth hung open, the child taking no pause in smothering the worg with uninvited pets and fur ruffles as though he hadnât just been introduced to the stranger with the big âdoggieâ.
To his credit, Finn took the boyâs affections in stride, tongue hanging out to one side as he gave a happy little huff and leaned into the pets, barely even acknowledging Raxwel as he knelt down giving the worgâs chest a quick rub as he reached eye-level with Renault.Â
âHe looks like whoâŠ?â he shifted enough to glance back at Hale curiously, her response causing the wheels in his head to turn a touch faster.Â
âHis stuffed animal. It was a suggested name many years ago when he acquired the thing.â Hale quickly replied and crossed her arms.
âI wonder by whomâŠâ With a low hum and a quick shake of his head he turned back to the boy in front of him, offering a small smile as he reached up to scratch behind one of Finnâs ears. âHello, Renault. Itâs nice to meet you. My name is Raxwel and itâs funny that you say that this fellow here looks just like âFinnâ because his name actually is Finn. Heâs been with me for a long long time. Has your Finn been with you for a long time?â
Finn, refusing to be left out of the conversation, punctuated the question by giving the side of the boyâs face a good lick. Through the lick and barrage of chuckles, Renault nodded, âMmhm! Had him for a long time!â he made sure the answer the man back but seemed far too enthralled with the massive dog.
âForgive him, itâs the first time heâs ever gotten to pet one.â she paused and ticked a gaze over to Raxwel, âA canine.â she followed up with.
Another shake of his head as Raxwel stood, keeping a watchful eye as Finn enjoyed Renaultâs attention. âNothing to apologize for. Itâs reasonable that heâd be excited, Finn certainly is.â He gave another quick click of his tongue, drawing the worgâs attention for a moment, âCareful.âÂ
Satisfied that the order was heard he stepped away from the pair and towards the boyâs mother, his head tilted to the side ever so slightly.
âWe keep to ourselves mostly. Ottavia visits and will sit with him, my mother comes mostly but we rarely get visitors and much of our time is either spent here, in Stormwind or Boralus when Iâm tending to my company.â
âIf one werenât looking for this place itâs quite easy to miss. I can see how visitors would be few and far between, but can also see the appeal in that.â He trailed off for a moment, his attention drawn back to the boy and the worg - whose tail was wagging happily behind him. âI wondered, for quite some time after the missives stopped coming, what happened, things had seemed to be going smoothly enough, but I knew better than to pry. It was better to allow you your space and wait.â
Slowly his gaze shifted back, dark eyes meeting green. âBut I didnât expect it to be five years before Iâd see you again, or for you to have a five year old son, with a stuffed canine who happens to share a name with my worg.â He glanced back at the pair for a moment, Finn now up bouncing around Renault playfully as the little boy chased him, giggling. âHeâs a beautiful child, HaleâŠyouâve done a wonderful job with him.â
âYouâve been busy chasing the dead and I was busy chasing a legacy.â She spoke and watched Renault who was completely oblivious to the adult conversation happening. For all Raxwel knew, she could have been a terrible mother and things seemed well enough on surface level, âI never considered our business affair to be something that lasted longer than it was needed.â
Dipping back into the house a moment she pulled a coat from the rack inside and wandered down to where her son had been playing with the lifesized Finn. With some resistance, she managed to get him bundled which allowed him and the Worg to play for some time. She paused next to Raxwel as Renault found a hefty stick on the ground to hold out for Finn as they went back to their game of chase.
âRen has his moments but I suspect all children do. Full of questions and constantly curious, heâs gifted in many ways and is a good kid. Heâs getting older now and starting to become his own little person but he is my heart.â The moment of whimsy passed and Hale gave Raxwel a skeptical glance, âWhy are you here Rax?â
âThat they doâŠhave their momentsâŠsteal our hearts. But such is the way of things.â He exhaled slowly, slipping one hand into a pocket, the other resting on the bag at his side as he watched the boy and the worg play, a scene from another time momentarily flashing before his eyes before gave his head a quick shake. âI wasnât being misleading earlier. I was looking for you.â
âThere wereâŠand still are few business relationships I considered worth maintaining. Youâve known me long enough to know connections are, they can be, dangerous. I move from city to city, town to town. Itâs easier that way. Safer. For every one. I got back from the Shadowlands a few years ago, from âchasing the deadâ as you put it, and spent some time in Westfall and sawâŠâ He trailed off and shrugged one shoulder, his gaze drifting off to the pair chasing after one another once again, â...I donât know what it was, who it was and thought it was better that way because connections only hurt people.â
Another slow exhale as he brushed his tongue across one of his canines. âBut the thought that I needed to check on the people I considered important, wouldnât leave me alone.â He turned to look at her. âAnd so here am I am.â
A small sigh escaped her and Hale refrained from rolling her eyes, âAre you meaning me specifically or do you really mean people in general? I disappeared because of those very same dangers and having Renault I wasnât going to subject him to those possibilities.â She watched the child now, sure he was out of earshot from the pair but close enough she knew where he was at all times even if it was just outside the house and near the orchard.
âYou, Hale. I meant you, specifically.â
âI havenât any business for you Raxwel nor am I sure that Iâll be reverting to old partnerships in the past. I have a different view on things now. I keep my business going between Stormwind and Boralus and thatâs been enough for me for the time being.â
His gaze didnât leave her, even as hers moved back to Renault. âI didnât expect that you wouldâŠnot after five years, and I can understand why, now. Children have a way of making our priorities change.â His gaze then followed hers to the little boy, âIâm not here, and itâs not my intention to make your life, or his life difficult, Hale.â
Again Finn hopped up and licked the boyâs face with a happy yip before running a small circle around the child as the wheels in Raxwelâs head continued to turn. â...Forgive me if this is too personal a question, but is his father involved in his life? Does he know?â
âHe isnât and not because he chose not to be. Itâs simply a matter of what was for the best. What I thought was for the best given his line of work.â There was a momentary pause and she took in the sight of both boy and dog, something so picture perfect on a chilly afternoon. For Renault, all he wanted was a friend and for much of his life his family were his friends along with the worn little old-teddy he carted around with him everywhere. A second Finn, as it were and now he had a real-life Finn right there with him even if it was fleeting, âNo, he doesnât know.â Hale finally looked back to Raxwel.
âI know secrets are kept for a reason, HaleâŠbetter than most.â He swallowed roughly as Finn laid down, taking a momentary break from the game, and Renault settled down next to him, laying his head against the worgâs fur. It was easy to find contentment in the scene and almost lose himself in it, to forget that at any moment the women beside him could ask him to leave, and he would be expected to do just thatâŠthat he was a visitor here, and it wasnât his home.Â
ââŠbut would you tell him, his father, if given the opportunity, and if you knew Renault would be safe?â Another quick shake his head and he forced himself to look away from the content pair on the ground, resting before the next round of play and back to the woman beside him.
There was no way around it and certainly there were no fun and games to be had with current conversation, "He's yours, Rax." Was what she left him with. There was a prolonged stare for a moment from the woman before making her way over to pluck up the boy from the dog and ground.
Surely the games were fun and being outside was nice but the climate wasn't favorable. As the pair made their way back she paused before Raxwel, "You're welcome to come in. Stay a while â no expectations. Have something to drink or eat, leave when you wish. I offer you our hospitality since you came all this way."
Finn hopped up, trailing after the woman and glancing up quickly before circling around Raxwel and nudging the side of his leg in an attempt to draw the man back to his senses. When that didnât work, the worg nudged a bit harder, and when Raxwelâs gaze remained fixated on the boy in Haleâs arms, Finn huffed before walking around behind the man giving his rear a sharp nip.
That was enough to get his attention.
He glanced over his shoulder, his eyes narrowing at Finn for a moment before turning his attention back to Hale, âI would like that very muchâŠI take it Finn would need to stay outside, yes?â
âNo?â Hale paused in the stride and glanced over her shoulder to her company, âIt's a home not a china shop. Besides, I wouldnât hear the end of it. Its warmer inside, best not have everyone freezing out here.â
She led them all inside, right away the cozy warmth hit Haleâs nipped cheeks, Renault warm within her grasp and quickly fading to exhaustion since Finn tuckered him out. His eyes would open here and there trying to sneak a glimpse of his company and to make sure Finn was still with them, blinking in and out of sleep; a fighter against the sleepies it seemed.
Hale led the trio into the lounging room and set Renault along one of the cozy chairs, adjusting his jacket off of him and bundling him in the blanket that hung from the back. The fireplace within the room was lit, crackling away and filled with wood which would keep the room warm for hours to come. The house itself was big and a few unfamiliar faces flitted between the rooms, housemaids seeing to their evening tasks. It was likely that Hale and her son wanted for nothing. As it had always been, while coming from a wealthy family, Hale still seemed to hold quite a bit of her independance and served the Cress name in her own way and paving her own way by her own funds.As was the way of it for her. An entrepreneur through and through.
âMaria, some coffee and tea if you would?â Hale asked, stopping one of the women on their path who nodded in response and swiftly went about her way to see to her tasks.
Ever mindful of his surroundings, Raxwel took the initial moments after following Hale into her home to glancing around, taking in the new faces and the space itself for a moment. Their meetings had always been on the fly, in taverns, or inns, perhaps under the Stormwind cathedral a time or two, but rare were the opportunities to see each other in a space that was truly their own.Â
His attention was drawn back to the sleeping boy as he eased into one of the nearby chairs, Finn moving to lay by his feet, and he leaned forward, clasping his hands between his knees. His thoughts were nothing short of a maelstrom as he looked at the small sleeping form.Â
The very fact that he existed was nothing short of a miracle - there were thousands of questions he felt like he should be asking, things he thought he should be feeling, and all he could manage was to sit and watch the boy sleep in nothing short of awe.
He licked his lips as he managed to pull his gaze away from the small sleeping form and look towards Hale, âWhenâŠwhen did you find out?â
Folding the jacket she let it rest along her arm, attention cutting to Raxwel,â Several weeks after one of our last encounters. Weâve had many so I canât exactly pinpoint one specifically.â
Not far off the tall decorated tree in the corner twinkled, Mariaâs reflection moving along the many glass ornaments when she entered with a tray. Coffee, tea â cups as the Lady of the house requested. Hale held her words and comments until the housemaid had made her way out, âWorry not, Iâm not expecting anything from you Raxwel. Heâs comfortable and well cared for with a wonderful education. Several factors are at play as to why you havenât even been afforded a letter with a simple hello or knew of him; Iâm sure you can put that all together yourself without me telling you but for the sake of brevity â safety, your past, the spring of unplanned responsibility, lifestyle change and many others.â
A small breathless chuckle escaped him. âI neverâŠthe thought that you would want or expect something never crossed my mind, Hale. If you had, if there had been a need for me to know, I wouldâve heard much sooner. I do understand the reasoning, just as I would understand and be grateful if this is the only time I get. But to know that he exists isâŠitâs more than enough.â
The surreal nature of the scene, the tree in the corner, the crackling fire, the woman across from him, their son sleeping in the chair just out of arms reach, was enough to make his mind spin.
âThough, itâs human nature to want more.â He reached down to pet Finn lightly, his gaze never leaving the dark haired woman. âI would understand why that would be a possibility. And if today is all I can haveâŠthen Iâll find a way to be content.â
With a heavy sigh, Hale plucked a small stuffy from the confines of the long sofa on which Raxwel sat, by the leg hung a well-used toy. âFinnâ to be exact, though it wasnât an exact replica of the worg it certainly came close with its faux lupine features. Years of wear were evident, probably hundreds of washes, an unfathomable about of cuddles, and years of seeing plenty of outdoor adventures was not something a mother could wash from its plush. Time had taken a grip on the toy with no signs of leaving, âWe donât ask the hard questions here about you when he is too young to understand the gravity of why things are the way they are. Iâve lived a very dangerous and frivolous life as do you and neither of those things I know is safe grounds for a child so I merely adapted. I understand that you still have a job to do and all of this is a lot to take in. If today is all you want or need and feel you can be content with, then we can too. Weâve been fine here without you and weâll continue on the same if need be.â
A tinge of a smile was expressed and Hale handed the floppy toy out to Raxwel, âHeâs safe either way. Heâs a happy boy who loves to be outdoors and is extremely curious, sometimes too curious for his own good. There are days I see a lot of you in him and those are the days that I know youâre not truly far off.â A low chuckle left her and her brows rose at the pitiful sight of the overused plush, âHis Finn. Heâs had it with him since he was born. So in fact, Iâve kept parts of you close without anyone being the wiser.â
âHere even without knowing that I wasâŠâ Carefully he took the offered plush, running his fingers across the worn fur. The worg at his feet lifted itâs head to give the item a tentative sniff and then, with a satisfied huff, lowered his head once more but Raxwel paid him no mind as he turned the plush over in his hands, taking in every little detail.Â
âAnd what if all I want, or feel that I need or can be content with, is sitting right here in this room with me?â He brushed a hand over the plush once more, physical proof of a childhood well lived and of untold adventures between the sleeping boy and his furry friend, before glancing across at Hale. âThereâŠjobs are jobs. There will always be another, if I choose to take it, but I could walk away and none would be the wiser. I can see that you two have been fine without me, and I have no reason to doubt that youâd continue to do just fine without meâŠbut I donât know that I could forgive myself if I were given the opportunity to get to spend time with him, to get to know him and if I did not take that opportunity. And I do want to get to know him, HaleâŠto see that curiosity and to see the type of boy he is.âÂ
âI donât want today to be the only afternoon he gets to play with Finn in the yard, or todayâs conversation to be the only one I get to have with himâŠand maybe that makes me selfishâŠâ
After a few moments of letting her company speak, Hale decided to take a seat with a bit of a long sigh. She didnât look at him nor seem eager to convince him of anything in particular, instead, she casually went about pouring herself some tea â lemon wedge included. Only after a few stirs of her drink did she finally begin to speak; thoughts being sat with and all, âIf that is what you choose then I will not deny that of you. But I wasnât keen before on getting in the way of your life then and Iâm not about to now. Safety aside, I didnât know if you had something else going on. Other people, other plans and ideas or what the future looked like for you or what life you wanted to chase. You had your demons andâŠ.well, we both know I had mine. Still do. We both do I think but that is neither here nor there; weâre not looking to block you from pursuing anything you have planned for yourself.â
A genuine smile did form and she looked to her left at Raxwel beside her, her hands coming together between her knees as she sat, âIf you want to see him and be in his life, I wonât deny that of you. Not anymore.â
The plush version of Finn was given one final brush before Raxwel reached out and gently sat him beside his sleeping owner. He took a moment, gathering his thoughts before turning towards Hale and reaching a hand out to hers.
âThe future, for me, has always been in flux. Iâve always been chasing something, never knowing what. There is nothing I could or would want to find, more important than this. Youâre not wrong, I will always have my demons, but theyâre something Iâll happily fight off for an opportunity to get to know Renault. YouâŠheâŠthisâŠis not blocking me from anything.â
âBe it far from me to stand in the way of that then.â She had waited some time before taking the offered hand but did so anyways in good faith despite how long it had been.
âIf you havenât any plans, youâre welcome to stay with us for Winter Veil. Iâm sure Ren would enjoy that and if there probably isnât a better way to break the ice than with a holiday, gifts and a worg at your side.â
He pressed a light kiss to the back of her hand, bringing it to his forehead for a moment before releasing the hand back to her, fingertips lingering but only for a moment. âI would like nothing more.â
â...Thank you, Hale.â
Raxwelâs gaze shifted once more to the sleeping boy as Finn wandered over and planted himself down closer to the child, seemingly understanding that theyâd be staying for a while. A small smile formed as his shoulders gradually relaxed, before cautiously reaching forward and brushing the bangs away from Renalutâs face softly, mindful not to wake the sleeping boy - still not entirely convinced that he wouldnât disappear the moment he touched him, and there was a sigh of relief when the boy remained as he was.Â
He couldnât remember the last time heâd truly celebrated any holiday, but especially a Winterâs VeilâŠhe couldnât remember the last time heâd had a reason to, fraught as they were with difficult memories that heâd done his best to avoid. But for the first time in years, there was a reason to look forward to Winterâs Veil. Â
For the first time in years, he didnât feel the ache that tended to settle in the center of his chest as the holiday inched closer.Â
He had a son. A living son.
A gift he never expected - a miracle in every sense of the word.
Heâd learned very early on in his work that he could not afford to miss the forest for the trees.Â
He worked in detailsâŠyes, but he couldnât afford to miss the bigger picture in favor of just the details. He knew better than to do this, and so a mystery arises and the answer eludes him for upwards of three years and what is the first thing that he does?Â
Misses the forest for the trees.
Raxwel sighed as he downed the contents of his glass before motioning for a refill.Â
Three years of hunting down leads and pursuingâŠwhat? An image of something that may or may not exist?Â
He was missing a key detail. IF the vision was true, and IF the individuals did exist, then they saw him just as he saw themâŠand they didnât want to be found.Â
Three years of searching for people who didnât want to be found. This wasnât a job, this wasnât something being pursued for anything beyond his own interestâŠand that wasnât enough.
That didnât mean he wouldnât glance that direction the next time he was in Westfall, or that he wouldnât be curious - the figure seemed familiar - but he would be content to be curious.
đ GREEN HEART - what things make your oc feel comforted? hugs, kisses, food?
That's kind of a hard question to answer because Raxwel really hasn't allowed himself to feel comforted in a while - he doesn't think he's deserving of it. (There's only been one instance of him being comforted, and that was with Tinnaire in Revendreth after confronting his parents, he wasn't expecting it, and certainly didn't feel that he deserved it.)
For the most part, he relies on items - bourbon, cigars, maybe an over-the-top meal - but those don't really address anything, they just allow him not to think or to escape for a bit.
A hand on the shoulder, a hug, someone running a hand through his hair - things like that can be comforting if he lets someone get that close. (Hale @blessedbypride and Tinnaire are the only two who have gotten even remotely close to that.)
âHow would you like to go...when itâs your time?â
It took a moment for Raxwel to process the question...and then another moment to shift onto his side, propping his head up against his hand as his narrowed gaze turned on his wife who appeared quite comfortable looking up at the night sky and not at all perturbed by the question.
âOkay, first things first - what in the world prompted that question? And to answer the question, I donât know - I always assumed Iâd piss someone off enough that theyâd have me taken out rather violently...and by someone I mean my parents.â
Eliza turned her head enough to glance up with a smile, reaching over and brushing his hair away from his eyes. âWeâre all going to go at some point, Raxwel - There was talk this morning of one of the old farmers, he passed away in his sleep last night, and the merchants were discussing how theyâd prefer to go when their time comes. Now...the question wasnât how did you think you would go, but how would you like to.â
Raxwel sighed heavily, flopping down onto his back - allowing Eliza to shift over and rest her head against his shoulder. âIf I had a say - quietly, as an old man, in my sleep. I think itâs a fortunate few who get to go that way.â
âBefore, or after me?â
âWith some of my habits? Psh, before. Besides - we both know Iâd find way too much trouble without you here to keep me in check.â
Eliza gave a low hum as she adjusted her head against his shoulder, glancing skyward once again. âMaybe...I have this...nagging feeling that wonât be the case - but feelings are just feelings. Promise me something, Raxwel?â
He glanced down - concerned - before pressing a light kiss to the top of her head. âAnything.â
âIf something does happen...if I do go first...promise me you wonât just give up. Promise me youâll live.â
âEliza, I -â
He was silenced by a light kiss, his gaze meeting hers as she slowly sat up. âNo - your story didnât start when I walked into your life, Raxwel Blythe - it wonât end if we were somehow separated. Promise me.â
âI...you and Galen are my life, Eliza - without you...without either of you - what am I?â
âPlease...Raxwel.â
He exhaled slowly, before nodding and leaning forward enough to rest his forehead against hers. â...I promise. It...itâd take time, but I promise.â
âThatâs all I askâŠâ
In weeks following the attack...in the months after he left Gilneas, that night...that promise had haunted him. Heâd promised her heâd live...but what life was there when it felt as though his heart had been ripped from his chest?
It was only years later - sitting in a wheat field in Westfall, contemplating the events of his time in the Shadowlands, that he realized what Eliza had tried to tell him.