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@bloodrageprince
{The Mentor and the Protégé} Nicolas x Amber
thexdarkxwithin:
Life is hard.
Life is confusing.
Life is just one fucked up moment after another where you have to grip the better times with both hands and hope in vain that they don’t slip through your fingers like grains of sand.
Amber is pushing to maintain everything that she stands for, which might not be much to some, but it means everything to her. The same applies to the handshake. It was done in humour but it veiled a little more than that and had nothing to do with not trusting him. It was her own belief in herself which curdled away into nothing–never really seeing anyone who would come true on their word–not as important as this anyway. She knows she is asking alot for Nic to come back for her–to make sure she doesn’t turn into another forgotten one who was thought of with the best intentions. He offered though–he said it first without her even stating so–though the young blonde was damn quick to take him up on it.
She’d never travelled to another country so Amber had never experienced these things he spoke of. Yet she can imagine her own patience.
“I would be bored out of my damn tree I reckon, if I was left hours waiting for a freakin’ plane.”
A thought pops into her head and she leans into him and smirks.
“Just refrain from eating any incapable attendants, okay?”
The playful expression which graces her face probably looks out of place considering the conversation subject, but this is Amber–a young incorrigible werewolf and Nic–an ancient incorrigible, deadly vampire, so yeah–it seems quite fitting.
Mentioning Jacob, is a sure fire way to knock the wind out of her. She has kept the facade up for so long to show he clearly didn’t bother her, when in truth, he always did. Time and time again she refused to steer clear of the vampire, knowing full well he loved any fear he could sense within the young wolf.
Maybe if Amber and Nic had been the sharing type, she would have told him of her last couple of times meeting Jacob and how badly it went, but she never wanted Nic to look at her with pity or to think she was only darkening his doorstep because she needed protection. After all, he’d once accused her of it when she needed a place to stay for the night. She chose to think he’d said it because this was his defence mechanism, a way for him to not get close–his mind not believing she would want nothing of him but friendship. She is also aware he conclusions might be completely wrong but it doesn’t really matter because she has no intention of airing it anyway.
“Well he might..I mean..it…”
Her breath hitches and Amber can only stop mid-sentence and continue to look at Nic.
“You killed him?”
She knows what he said, but somehow it is taking a little time to digest. She doesn’t feel sorry for Jacob at all, he was just like those vampires who attacked her that night when Nic had stepped in–no, no….in fact, Jacob was worse. He continuously kept her on edge, informing her he would end her life, but never saying when. So she knew one day he would just come and that would be it–death–but not before gloating on his part, she was damn sure of that.
But now?
It only begins to manifest just what a weight she bore on her young shoulders because of him and Nic has just alleviated that pressure. She breathes loudly for a few seconds as though her body is digesting the news. Amber blinks and swallows thickly. How can you repay someone for doing that? One thing she has learned is to show them, it’s not always about favours and doing something back–it’s about showing you care.
She inhales deeply through her nose and diverts her gaze before hugging him. It’s done with far more gentleness than ever before and she whispers softly into his ear.
“Thank you….”
A loud exhale leaves her lips and she repeats herself.
“Thank you…..”
She kisses his cheek and makes a noise in her throat as though she is trying to clear it when there’s nothing really there. Amber doesn’t want the details, doesn’t want to revel in every minute leading to Jacob’s demise, she isn’t like that. It brings her no joy–but she is still glad he is dead.
“Righteo…um…we should depart, right?…can’t have anyone thinking we have gone fuckin’ soft…or that I would wanna cry…because it would be lies…it would be wrong…”
She fights the pressure building behind her eyes again.
“I won’t let you down…”–and I am trusting you with everything I am to not let me down either.–and she truly believes he won’t, especially now after what he has just told her. “So until we meet again, right?”
He feigns shock. “What, you? A veritable paragon of patience? Why, if you would be bored out of your mind waiting for a plane, imagine how the rest of us fare.” The Original teases her, knowing well it’s more like the other way around. Their relative impatience and short temper are flaws they clearly have in common, and yet still, somehow they managed to spend the better part of a year training every. Single. Day. It’s a feat for any two people, more so because they are cut from the same cloth. More similar, than they are different.
And yet for all of their success, it is their differences that Nicolas loves the most when it comes to Amber. L o v e s ... The way she opens her heart, no matter how many times it’s been made to bleed. The fierceness with which she refuses to give up on him - even when he’s given her ample reason to do just that. He doesn’t know how she does it, or w h y ... Only that he’s come to respect her for it, in a quiet, unspoken sort of way. Some of the most profound moments in their friendship have been forged in silence. No words necessary; none, that could capture the lessons they have learnt thanks to one another.
“No promises on the incapable attendants, sweetheart.” Because it’ll take an old dog more than a few years in this town to learn some new tricks. A droll, whimsical pause, and then his voice takes on a quieter, more sincere tone that is reserved for very few people in his life. “But I do promise that I will return for you... And,” The vampire adds, witnessing the relief in her eyes upon hearing of Jacob’s demise, “- And, that I will a l w a y s protect you.” Once, every couple of decades - sometimes centuries - someone will come along and touch his heart in such a way as to earn that rare and valuable promise from the Original. But aside from his precious sister, none have received a verbal confirmation of his pledge up until now - up until Amber. Not just a word, but something to hold onto.
So when she leans in to place a kiss on his cheek, he remains unwaveringly still. Memorizing the moment, memorizing t h e g i r l . But when she makes to pull away, he grabs her wrist gently, stopping her from withdrawing fully. "Until we meet again, little Gypsy... And Amber,” He continues, leaning forward just a fraction. “... Thank you.” He leaves the softest kiss on her own cheek in return, imbued with just as much meaning as the handshake from before.
And then, before emotion can overtake either of them, before he can be tempted to balk and reconsider his plans, before any more of her tears can fall for his sake - Nicolas Clark is gone, nothing but a whisper in the wind to tell her it was r e a l ...
There is a man who travels around the world trying to find places where you can stand still and hear no human sound. It is impossible to feel calm in cities, he believes, because we so rarely hear birdsong there. Our ears evolved to be our warning systems. We are on high alert in places where no birds sing. To live in a city is to be forever flinching.
Jenny Offill, Dept. of Speculation
{The Mentor and the Protégé} Nicolas x Amber
thexdarkxwithin:
“I do believe we have, yeah…” She looks at him and holds her hand out with a cock of the brow. “But we gotta seal the deal…we ain’t committed to it without a handshake.” A familiar smile bounces back on her face as Amber has never actually used this to seal any sort of deal–but it feels kind of appropriate and her line of thinking is that he is an ancient–handshakes will have been going for years and years–so, therefore, it will be his kind of thing. Her train of thought really can be debatable sometimes and most people really don’t know how she gets to the point she is at, but she does and so it makes sense to her. It is still classed as important to her though, the young wolf will do everything within her power to make sure she doesn’t let him down in any way.
The fondness she has for him hits her in waves and she no longer tries to put up the front of not really caring. Sure, she’s told him in the past she does, but they have gone through some difficult times too and on certain occasions, she was sure she would scare him away with any sort of open display of affection and care. So Amber poking him in the chest is her way of being affectionate–it’s weird yes, but resigned to very few indeed.
“Letters? I don’t think I have ever…oh but yes a text!” She is halfway through her sentence when she nods and sounds a little enthusiastic. Writing letters sounded like it could get a little tedious for her–a chance for her mind to wander, but texts for some reason, definitely wouldn’t do that. “I’ll text you…make sure you don’t go grouchy whilst away.” A small twinkle in her eyes can be seen. “Well…no more grouchy than you already can be.”
“Hey!” A chuckle leaves her lips and in that moment, she welcomes the small reprieve her brain has let her have. Nic is to take credit too because his teasing allows Amber to forget what this meeting is about–just for the briefest of moments as she laughs. “Be careful framing it, next time if I lose my shit….it might get knocked off the wall just like your favourite ornament.” She grins, not even thinking whether he will not take it as a joke like she has. Which is just like Amber–straight out with it–blunt as ever and no filter.
“I’ll not forget…I swear I won’t.” Her expression changes to one of a serious frown and she casts her eyes away from him for a moment. Now Amber could be all blasé about it and play down the whole thing between her and Jacob, but she owes Nic more than that. “I haven’t seen him for a while…last time was when I got my freakin’ head slammed into a wall…proper blurred my vision.”–and hurt like fuck but she refrains from saying that. “Actually no…one time after that…he was on about coming good on the threats to me one day…I ain’t seen him since though….why?”
He’s speculative for a moment, wondering why her tone’s gotten gruff and expectant until she sticks her hand out and bluntly requests they shake on it. He can’t help it again, a smile tugs at the corners of his lips and Nicolas briefly wonders how it is that she brings so many out of him. He finds them, to be sure, but Amber succeeds nonetheless. And lately, he’s found the impulse more and more difficult to control.
... Maybe some time apart will help him get a better handle on it and regain his pride.
“As you wish, then.” The Original replies, matching the girl’s stoic tone as he reaches out to clasp his hand firmly over hers. So they shake on it. And seeing as Amber is a business woman through and through, he has no doubts she’ll keep him to it. He also has no doubts that if he somehow fails to come back in an acceptable enough time-frame, the willful young werewolf will find him, burn him to cinders, and drink a sturdy ale spiked with his ashes.
Of these things, he has little doubt.
“No promises on staying chipper, however. Travel does have a way of wearying the soul sometimes. Flight delays, unwieldy routes, woefully incapable attendants...” He lists off his chief complaints, and they both know the list is likely a long one. Thankfully, the Original saves her the trouble. Although it’s not something he voices aloud, he looks forward to her communications - even if they’re through the equally infuriating medium of ‘texts’. Somehow, he suspects Amber will manage to lighten his days, even at a distance. And in return, maybe the little he’s about to tell her will do the same for her days, the ones to come. “I can hardly say I’m surprised as to the nature of your last run-ins with him. Had I known he’d caused you harm I’d have had his head on a platter sooner. In any case, I hope you’ll be relieved to hear that he won’t in fact be making good on any of his threats towards you...” Nicolas trails off for a moment, looking away so that she can digest the news in privacy. “ — I killed him.”
3x06 “Beautiful Mistake”
@alexandre-sutton
Melancholy is dangerous. It’s addicting. Once you find a way to cope with your darkness, you don’t even wanna see a drop of light.
Hira
Deliverance || Nicolas x Jacob
jacobdashwood:
He sighed, the movement making his lungs hurt more, and he couldn’t help a coughing fit. He could feel the blood that was slowly filling his lung coming out. This whole thing grew more humiliating by the minute and he just wanted Nic to end this. “Should I feel honoured that you go all this way to show me what you think of me?”, he tried to uphold some of his arrogant behaviour, but that was immediately followed by another coughing fit.
He tried to shrug, but he immediately winced because of the pain in his shoulder. “I don’t say anyone would shed a tear about me dying…” That bridge had been burned. He had tried, honestly tried, when it came to Lexi, but he just wasn’t a man who could love. Or be loved, for that matter. “I do think however there are more than a few who would be delighted about my demise.” That list was long. Alexandre and Amber would only be a the top of it, but he was bloody sure there were more. Not that he wanted them to see him like this… it was humiliating, a stain on what he had once been. He gritted his teeth when Nicolas continued to rub in the fact that he wasn’t worth anything. That his stories wouldn’t be told until eternity. And as much as he did not want to believe the Original, he was afraid it was the truth. He let his gaze wander over his belongings. The furniture he had specifically ordered made after he moved here and discovered he wouldn’t leave anytime soon. The books, that had been his companions for years. The paintings on the walls… the idea that it would all be used by those lowlifes hurt, maybe even more than everything what Nicolas had done to him. He didn’t comment on it though… knowing that everything he said would be used against him. Would be used to torture him more.
Still, he winced when Nicolas broke his chair to pieces. He should be glad, it was one less thing that would be used to humiliate him even after his death, but the demolition of everything he had built hurt anyway. Still… would this mean it was over? “Finally…”, he sighed, before screaming in pain when the wood did not find his heart. Instead, he was immobilized further, unable to move anything but his arms and his head. It made him afraid… Yes, he would be able to heal from this, but it wouldn’t happen. He just didn’t know how much longer Nicolas would continue before finally killing him. Getting out of this alive, like he had let Sutton live, would not be an option. If he would survive this, it would be a victory for Jacob. Nicolas had no reason to let him live, burdened by his conscience like Jacob had done to Alexandre. Jacob had none. He didn’t feel remorse, he wouldn’t be guilty. He was afraid, though. And he was wondering if this was what his father had felt while being tortured to death by Alexandre. If his father had realized as well at a certain point that death was unavoidable. If his father had realized he would not leave the mark on history that he had wanted to make. If his father had wanted to beg his torturer to end it, eventually.
“Go to hell…”, he hissed through his clenched teeth, followed by another fit where he coughed up more blood. “On second thought, I’ll prepare you something special for when you’ll finally arrive there. Because in the end, you will, I’m sure of that.” Somewhere, there must be someone able to finish Nic off in the end, no matter how long it would take. He just had to believe he would be avenged.
“Yes, in fact.” Nicolas replied with a slick, sickening smile. “Now that I think on it, you should feel very f l a t t e r e d at the time I’ve taken out of my day in order to end you. After-all, I can think of so many preferable uses for my time. Then again,” He mused waving the glass of scotch around, “I suppose I have an endless amount of time in front of me. You, on the other hand...” He tilted his head, a pitying hum reverberating at the back of his throat. “- Not so much.” After all of the tortures he’d inflicted on the younger vampire, Jacob’s prognosis was grim, even if he turned around and walked out of the house at that very moment. He would’ve needed help to recover, help he was not likely to receive way. They both knew that now.
In some ways, Nicolas wondered whether his own fate would be any different, were their positions reversed right now. Would anyone come for him?.. He had his sister, he’d made a few friends over the years - enough to be counted on one hand, maybe - but even those he’d h u r t and let down as though he was destined to cause nothing but pain. It was different than the torment he was inflicting on Jacob - but arguably more agonizing because it was not physical in nature. It was mental, emotional; deep under the skin where it struck at the most vulnerable parts of them. His legacy was more than kingdoms rising and falling throughout history - than blood, murder and mayhem to be shared around some campfire in scandalized whispers. It was a trail of hearts he had no right to break over the years - hearts he’d broken anyway. Disappointment here, betrayal there, robbing loved ones of their fragile hope in him and replacing it instead with grief and with gall... Why had they not abandoned him?...
Jacob was right. There was a few who’d be very, very pleased at his demise. How many more would be pleased if an Original were to die? And even at this bitter end, even with a corkscrew in his lungs, a stake through his spine and enough broken bones to fill a graveyard, Jacob tried to grasp at the remaining straws of his pride. What good would it do him?... What good did it do any of them, in the end?... No one was here for him, no one would cry for him - the room was e m p t y . It was a bleak enough thought to dampen even Nicolas’ own triumphant mood though he hid it well. Certainly, his taste for the running commentary had soured somewhat. “Go to hell...” He echoed almost thoughtfully, before knocking the drink back in one gulp. Hell ... Yes, he supposed there was that to look forward to. “Kind of you to prepare it for me, keep my seat warm and all that.” He snorted, wiping at his mouth. “That’s as good a toast as any. Fine scotch too - pity you wouldn’t stomach it in your present state.”
He strolled towards the younger vampire, listening to each laboured breath, to the sound of his heart, struggling to pump any remaining blood through his failing system. “Well, I suppose on that touching note...” He let the empty scotch glass slip from his fingers and shatter a few inches away from Jacob, before leaning down to yank the injured man up by the throat. Nicolas ignored the cry that went up in pain as he dangled - it wouldn’t be long now. And then, without remorse or delay, he drove his hand into the man’s chest and reached for his heart, severing it from its home. Nature took over then. Five hundreds years caught up with the vampire as his skin turned a molten grey, red veins pulsating to a deep black around his eyes as the life finally left them. The Original released his bloodied grip, and the corpse dropped to his feet. The quivering organ in his palm finally stopped twitching and he released that, too.
“Goodbye, J a c o b D a s h w o o d .”
“Unfinished Duets”, Richard Siken
February, month of despair, with a skewered heart in the centre. I think dire thoughts, (…)
Margaret Atwood, from February in “Morning In The Burned House”
There is nothing very remarkable about being immortal; with the exception of mankind, all creatures are immortal, for they know nothing of death. What is divine, terrible, and incomprehensible is to know oneself immortal.
Jorge Luis Borges, The Aleph
{The Mentor and the Protégé} Nicolas x Amber
thexdarkxwithin:
He may not realise it, but those five words which leave his lips, mean absolutely everything to Amber, purely because they are said from someone she does respect and care about, but a nagging part of her had been expecting him to not make any promises. Of course, she prefers people to be honest if they are walking out of her life for good, but it doesn’t mean that it hurts any less, she has just learned to put a brave face on things.Yet raw unhidden honesty rises to the surface with Nic, it always has done.
“Then I’ll stay…so you’d better make sure breath still remains in your body.”
Her blue hues don’t shift from the ancient and she swallows thickly.
She has no real way of knowing that the saying ‘out of sight, out of mind’ isn‘t going to apply once he has left Arcadia. Maybe the young wolf will be seen as naive by others, but she trusts him–something that is rarely given by her.
“I would…I would love that.” Amber has travelled from town to town, city to city, but rarely stayed past a few weeks until arriving in Arcadia. She has never got to really experience anything scenic–anything beautiful and regardless of what others think about her, she can actually appreciate real beauty in the landscape and surroundings. “And I will cook you breakfast too..make you my famous eggy bread..’cause it’s freakin’ awesome.” Through the tears that have fallen, Amber offers him a smile, genuinely finding things she can hold onto whilst he is gone.
“I pr..”
–she never makes a promise if in her heart she thinks she might not be able to keep it. Yet she also doesn’t want to ever admit any tears will fall either.
“I won’t….I won’t cry…I’m a badass fuckeroo….it’s those onion peeling ninjas that catch me off-guard..” She smirks because weirdly enough, she had started to find herself not swearing so much in front of him, but in one respect, swearing helps her to maintain her tough composure–almost like she can hide behind it. Yet in truth at other times, it just rolls off of her tongue like normal talk would to someone else. “Oh, I believe that…you have a way of finding out about everything.”
Amber is weakening again though, the ache in her heart–a constant reminder that for a while she will do what she usually does and push people away until any hurt has subsided.
So she looks up at him, eyes showing the emotions she just can’t hide no matter how hard she tries. Nic talking about his sister is enough to gain her attention though and she nods.
“Now that I can do…I’ll drop by sometimes too.” Victoria had been someone she didn’t expect to get along with, yet Amber had and even though she doesn’t say anything to Nic, she feels a sense of pride purely because she knows how much he loves his sister–even though he might not be open about admitting such a thing. “I won’t let you down…I can give hell if I need to…as you well know. You don’t have to worry about anything.” The brief smile he gives is enough to let her expression soften and the young wolf smiles. “I am gonna miss you…I can say that, right?..’cause I am….and…” She drags up something positive–something lighter and pokes him in the chest. “…you have busted my balls to get me to my full potential…I will never forget that…because it was hard freakin’ work…but..I staked you…and lived…..” The edges of her lips curl up to form a grin.
–she’s grinning–joking–showing him she can cope and she will do just that..
–but inside, she feels like her heart literally aches–as though someone has it in their hand and the grip is firm.
“Then it seems we’ve struck ourselves a bargain. I stay alive, return in some time - You stay out of trouble, and ensure my sister does the same.” And in doing so, she would earn Victoria’s limitless affection, and his sister would be equally if not more keen on ensuring that the young wolf stayed safe until his return. Because ultimately, he needed someone other than Amber to ensure that Amber stayed out of trouble. And he trusted no one with that task more than his own flesh and blood. Still, the impending loss - no matter how temporary - was no less difficult despite all of his careful arrangements.
And yet if his expression clouded over in response to his thoughts, it didn’t last long as she prodded a finger into his chest. He let his spine dip back in response, smiling as he captured her hand into his own. “You can say anything your heart desires, little gypsy. Though I do suggest you save something for the letters. You’ll write me those, yes? Maybe one over the phone as you lot do these days.” The Original scoffed, referring to a text. Despite insisting upon having the latest technologies at his disposal, he was still obstinately slow at making good use of them. Amber’s gratitude, however, had a much faster impact on him. “Is that a ‘thank-you’? Can I get it engraved and frame it in my living room?” Nicolas teased her fondly, before giving his head a shake and releasing her hand. “What you accomplished, you did so of your own labour and volition... You’ll thank me by remembering all that I have taught, and putting it to good use.” He didn’t want her to get rusty... Against a far older vampire, that often meant death. Even with Arcadia quieter these days, threats remained. “Now, we must come to the second matter. Tell me, when was the last time you saw Jacob Dashwood?”