broken doll

persephone, queen of the dead. // // trauma + ed (& sometiems yandere) vent // okay to interact/comment/rb

[bloominghoneyscreams]

they always leave eventually.

[bloominghoneyscreams]

https://gofund.me/b842c1fe

this gfm has been up for 3 months and is only met 1% (30+ bucks) of it's goal. my friend is already in dire straits and this medical situation is only making things worse.

she's been recently diagnosed with cancer and cannot continue treatment without this money, she has a baby who relies on her for safety (father is dangerous) and an adult son who loves her very much.

i can't explain in a way that's better than his own words, so please click the link and read the description.

please donate anything you can.

[bloominghoneyscreams]

"THIS IS ALL THE THIRD PARTY VOTERS FAULT!!!"

not enough people voted third party to even put a dent in the results, smart one.

perhaps they should invent a DNC that's not so historically worthless that people would rather stay home than have another democrat in office who simply sits there tsk-ing and wagging a disapproving finger as the republicans get everything they want anyway (i.e stripping human rights)

while we're at it, they should also invent a politically literate public who doesn't instantly turn on their fellow man the moment they lose, and instead begin to criticize the people who abandoned ship a long time ago and fucked up their sales pitch to begin with

eventually we're going to have to stop playing trolley problem every election season and just start interrogating the motherfuckers tying people to the tracks.

[come1nalone]

[veryluckyclovers]

[fnord888]

Child abuse is a big problem, so it's important that we don't let children communicate with adults except their parents and other official authority figures. Everyone knows the best way to prevent child abuse is to keep children isolated and ensure all their communications are controlled.

[metamorphesque]

― Fyodor Dostoyevsky, The Gentle Spirit

[bloominghoneyscreams]

ok im gonna go lay back down, hopefully i die

[bloominghoneyscreams]

i wish i was ever ever enough for people to stay. i've felt sick every day since you left me, like bedridden

worst of all isn't knowing that i have nowhere to go, that i dont know what to tell anyone, but that i'll never get you back

things will never be the same again and i don't know what to do

and i feel selfish just thinking about it

because i know you're so much happier without me dragging you down

but then i think of the bracelets i got for us, and how the one you said you wanted will never make its way to you

i think about the special rings i got, that I kept secret because it was a suprise and i knew you would love them

i think about how they'll never be worn and it hurts so fucking bad it's like I'm being torn apart from the inside out

and every night i say im sorry knowing it's too late and you'll never hear it and it wouldn't matter if you did

i wish you just said you hated me. you should just hate me for everything

it hurts the worst knowing it's all my fault I'm like this. that I'll never change because i was made broken

it hurts the worst knowing you ever knew me

i wish i was good enough

[bloominghoneyscreams]

ppl who followed me for ed content sorry to disappoint u but pssppsspspspsps I'm moving to an ED ONLY ACC so msg me 4 that if u wanna

[sacrificedprincess]

[die-rosastrasse]

François Martin-Kavel  (French, 1861-1931)

Alexander Roslin (Swedish, 1718-1793)

[bloominghoneyscreams]

I think I have some sort of brain thing (aka mental illness) from my childhood I was born with that made me easily overwhelmed, made it hard to understand how human people are supposed to work and why, and made most things i was told to do go in one ear and out the other without retaining the information or how to do said thing?? like,, i now have vivid memories of being told (aka yelled at lmao) that “I Don’t Know wasn’t an answer” so many times that whenever i would eventually be forced to answer a question with that I’d make up a very bad lie.

“oh my hand hurts i cant do my homework right now because i can’t hold my pencil..”

“i’m conveniently too sleepy to do my work i can’t focus!”

“i feel sick..” + “my tummy hurts!” + “my head hurts.. :(“

“i’m too hungry to work right now!”

then, in 2014 (probably, could’ve been a bit farther back bc of the host of traumatic experiences I’ve been through my entire like but uh w/e this was probably my Breaking Point) another brain thing hit me when i was 11 where i got ULTRA DEPRESSED, compared to the slight depression that sometimes hit me as a kid.

i got depressed, easily attached to other people (like even more than before), obsessed over people and had huge abandonment issues (again, MORE THAN BEFORE), flip flopped between hating people and loving them, flip flopped between self hatred and narcissism (mORE THAN BEFO-), and my anger just shot through the fucking roof. (what is this?? bpd? ptsd? GOD FUCKING KNOWS SPIN THE WHEEL OF GOING UNDIAGNOSED FOR YEARS)

and when i was kid, id occasionally self harm (w/o slicey). then once i turned 11 i started self harming even more (now ft. slicey).

idk what’s up with me lol but I’ve probably never been neurotypical a day in my life lmao

But That’s Just A Theory, A Brain Theory!! Thanks for watching!!

[bloominghoneyscreams]

okay so update;

some sweet and radical tumblr rando p much said im showing symptoms of mild aspergers and after researching a lot i can’t help but agree???

just...so many things about my childhood (and my current life in general lol) would be so much less confusing-

my sensitivity to loud noises and vibrations, my sensitivity to light, my kinda weird obsession with certain objects, the way it’s just 100% impossible to explain my emotions out loud and i get quickly overwhelmed and frustrated..

several articles I looked at even said that instead of having an open meltdown, girls with aspergers/autism would most likely resort to SELF HARM

My mind was COMPLETELY BLOWN when i saw that a symptom of autism/aspergers in girls is “allowing/needing other people to speak for her”

my sister has been speaking/explaining things I can’t say at all or Properly™️ to other people in my life for the longest time, and my mother fucking hates that shit-

so i think i might me be on the right track!

thanks, guy! (Also sorry I didn’t respond to you directly, this is a side blog and I really don’t wanna expose myself on my private vent account lmao)

[bloominghoneyscreams]

since I'm here, RANDO TUMBLR USER (tumblr took your response away from me??? Fuck u staff) YOU WERE RIGHT

I GOT DIAGNOSED 🎉🎉🎉

💃💃💃💃💃💃💃

[bpdkoala]

favorite person: *spends the whole day with me* me: this is good favorite person: *spends an hour w someone else* me: good to know u fucking hate me and want me dead

[angelicides]

the use of ’forever’ is <3 like yesss stay with me always, without end, right as we should （＾◡＾）♡

[dreamie]

i just want to draw tiny hearts everywhere because im full of love and the world is cruel

[sickdelights-deactivated2023091]

Don't ask me "wyd" i really just be in my room going insane and being a danger to myself