im still on my bullshit

cicada | 29 | it/its i am putting on my clown nose, i am making my dollies kiss, i am downloading mods for accessibility

[cheaphalloweencostume]

i have to call him a good boy or i’ll die and he’ll die too

[verenakauer]

One of my favourite bits of Grace's characterizations in the book is his Very Conscious Efforts to fight against zero g to make his silly lil gestures. Look at him. He's pouting, darn it!

[verenakauer]

So, uh. Fun fact. Do you know that Grace-from-the-flashbacks never refers to anyone from the PHM gang as a “friend”? He can admit that he likes to hang out with someone, but even when he is being pushed to go on the mission and desperately wants some human connection, he goes for “colleagues”. “It’s a dark and depressing feeling to have all your closest colleagues get together and decide you should die”. Not friends. Never friends. 

…Until he wakes up on the Hail Mary, that is. Until he sees the dead bodies and remembers that they were close friends to him; he remembers it before he remembers their names. He breaks down over it. He is too out of it to remember the masks he was using to protect himself from the heartbreak of befriending someone who is going to die soon. He remembers the truth, though.

Do you know that there is exactly one time when Grace-from-the-past refers to anyone from the project as “friends”? Do you know that it happens when he is actively breaking down about DuBois and Shapiro’s deaths? He does call them friends then. They are not here anymore to hear it.

I headcanon Grace as aroace and find Stratt's "You don’t have a romantic partner in your life because that would mean you might suffer heartbreak" quite icky, but. If she was talking about close friends instead of a romantic partner, she probably wouldn't have been too far off.

[verenakauer]

Continuing this thought: in an AU where the whole crew survives, Grace would be faced with quite a discrepancy. These people are calling themselves his friends. They are acting like friends. He feels they are friends. He loves Olesya’s sense of humour. He adores Yáo’s determination. He trusts them with his life; he knows they trust him back.

Then the memories start to return, and he is… confused. He waits for a moment when this friendship started to grow, and he just. can’t remember any. Colleagues, it’s always colleagues; the past him never thinks of them as friends. The past him is pretty sure they only kinda like him because he is always close to Stratt and the contrast makes him seem friendly. The past him refuses to acknowledge any closeness. 

…When he realizes that he, consciously or not, denied himself this human connection for years only to fall into it anyway and face the heartbreak he was hiding from, it’s already too late.

(At least he can die with them this time.)

[verenakauer]

Grace physically putting himself between Simon and danger, and Simon being so caught off guard by it.

It doesn't even have to be actual danger (not to Grace, at least). It can be the little ocean inside the dome on Erid. It can be a very angry Rocky who just learned that Simon tried to attack Grace when he just woke up. It can be Armando too eager to do some kind of an unwanted medical procedure and waving its arms around a little too wildly. Doesn't matter.

What matters is, this is the first time (except for maybe his early childhood) when Simon is physically shielded by someone else. When he is pushed away from danger, not towards it. When someone actively puts themselves in (what is perceived as) harm's way to prevent him from being hurt.

...I bet that'd do things to him. Something Grace's words of reassurance weren't quite able to do before.

[verenakauer]

I can see where the "eternally kind and patient Grace" interpretation is coming from, but it's so funny when you open the book and literally the first thing he thinks is "something is talking to me and it's ANNOYING".

...and then proceeds to spend the whole chapter being grumpy about gravity, of all things.

Like. At the very least, my guy is not a morning person. And that's not even mentioning the "staggering waste of carbon" of it all. He can be patient, sure, he's a teacher, but he's still human? Let him be human.

[verenakauer]

Grace mentioning to Rocky that he used to watch his ship every evening after they parted ways (and do complex math to figure out when he's going to lose sight of it completely). Grace is. a little bit embarrassed about the whole thing.

Rocky is ecstatic.

"Grace watched Rocky sleep, question? Even though we were apart??"

"...yeah. Yeah, pal, I guess I did."

[lonelytaumoeba]

Crying myself to sleep over this today

[ozempicofficial]

[machined-divinity]

[image ID: tweet by @/FCardamenis that says ‘Baby has gotten good at identifying “dada” but still struggling with surrealism, cubism, even baroque.’ end ID.]

[galacticsabc]

[snailera]

Reach for the stars💫

[etheireimagined]

you're gonna do great

[glavilio]

my name's cougar but my friends call me mountain lion and my mama calls me puma and today's my first day at big cat high. i'm so nervous i hope they don't realize i'm not panthera >ܫ<

[glavilio]

emo cheetah jughead smoking behind the school: it's hopeless, catamount. they'll never see us as 'real' big cats... us outcats gotta stick together -ﻌ•

[tysonfurybattlepass]

not pictured is the goth clouded leopard girl who bought the cigarettes w her fake id

[puncertainty]

continuing traditions

[dinodoggie]

I’ve just been thinking about all the ways Grace and Rocky would try to cook up taumoeba on their way to erid!

I hope you enjoy, and have an AWESOME day!!!

[limeskink]

Contact established with the Iron Lung.

Is he deadass, question?

I couldn't leave my bf to himself in the sea of Bloodymary. Now I can draw them being gay.

[manyblinkinglights]

Rocky assuming from his research that Grace is going to get space madness on the way to Erid but his friend keeps being fine, Rocky is doing a great job with his enrichment schedule and Grace doesn’t like the food (omg who caresssssssss) but is otherwise just, doing okay. Gets dressed every waking cycle like always, jokes about keeping it professional. Rocky’s efforts—and he’s making a lot of efforts—are fixing it. The Blip-A was a much bigger vessel with a lot more constantly going wrong with it, and the maintenance tasks here are so much easier to keep on top of, and nothing is slipping out of acceptable margins, and Grace looks to and smiles at him all of the time and won’t admit to anything being wrong with him and then Rocky of the 22 crewmembers all trying to absolve each other as they died is the one who gets the space madness.

[hobohobgoblim]

Four puppies cuddling. Pompey, 1 century CE.

[flmuseumgirl30]

We have always been human.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Close! Those are puppies.

[sympathischeufos]

We have always been puppies