ᴄᴏᴡʙᴏʏ ᴄᴀsᴀɴᴏᴠᴀ.

when that sun is high in that Texas sky I'll be bucking it to county fair. [ rp blog for the humanized state of texas. ] [ loosely hetalia affiliated. ] remember to click navigate!

[washingtonias-archive-deactivat]

If only.

Er, well. Washington was the last state to declare bestiality illegal, and it was only in response to, um. A man dying because he had sex with his horse.

[rubs his neck]

The depression thing just comes from the fact that western Washington has notoriously cloudy weather, but it’s not like it bothers us…and you don’t seem homophobic at all.

[bluebonnetking]

Oh-- Oh, good lord.That's... kinda fucked up, Colin-- [ He decides that's probably not the best thing to talk about. Thankfully, Colin brings up the other bit. ] Yeah, but, lot o' my people are. Therefore, everyone assumes I am. Guilt by association and all that. That depression thing's weak, though. That ain't gossip that's just misconception.

[washingtonias-archive-deactivat]

You two have fun with your little creature armies. If I ever bothered to form an army of some kind it’d be out of whales and marmots.

[waves a hand] I’m sure there’s gossip about me. Rumors surround that idiotic bestiality stereotype, or about how “depressed” I am because of my “constant rain”.

[bluebonnetking]

Whale army'd be scary if they could come on land. Really? That's weird-- I mean, the bestiality thing. Where'd that even come from, do y'know?

[ Tilts his head. ]

I guess the depression thing is pretty oddball too. I think the most gossip we get 'bout me is that I'm a homophobe or somethin'.

[washingtonias-archive-deactivat]

Then what exactly would you like to hear about? [counts off on his fingers] Arkansas’ possum army, Alaska’s petition to reunite with Russia, Arizona’s apparent grudge against me for whatever reason…

[narrows eyes]

Something about me?

[bluebonnetking]

I knew 'bout at least, like, one of those things. Didn't know Arkansas had a possum army, though. Sounds like somethin' I'd like to get in on, or maybe I should get t'gether, like, a 'dillo army to combat it. [ He laughs a little bit. ] You got gossip about you?

[washingtonias-archive-deactivat]

bluebonnetking replied to your post:bluebonnetking replied to your post:wietkoning…

Unless it’s like, someone who don’t have any game, y’know, looks like they won’t get nothin’, I refuse to find it interesting.

You’re such a party pooper, Alan. [paps his cheeks] 

[bluebonnetking]

[ Puffs out his cheeks. ] Wasn't a very fun party to begin with.

[drunkwario-deactivated20210407]

Anon hate from the late 1800’s.

[airspaniel]

What I love most about this is that this person was SO INCENSED at the recipient that they couldn’t even wait the days/weeks it would take for the mail to go through. No, they had to say “FUCK YOU” as soon as fucking possible and, AND, let the recipient that they were not done with the fuck you, nay, this was merely the first volley in what would undoubtably be a dressing down of Biblical proportions.

[dresswellactbad]

Amen.

[washingtonias-archive-deactivat]

Jeez, think about what you’re insinuating when you say stuff like that! I was certain you were calling me a fat cow!

[Tall, but most certainly not fat. In fact, compared to Alan, Colin was tiny; he was skinny and lightweight, probably just as easy as it was to pick up a teenage girl. Now he sighed, pouting slightly, but defensive arms down.]

A-Anyways, I’ll take you out for something to eat if you’re hungry. By the looks of it that apple won’t suffice for long.

[bluebonnetking]

I-- I just meant, y'know.. cows graze... Not that you were fat... You're not fat, not even a little. [ Alan wouldn't ever really call someone fat, either. That was kind of rude-- and generally speaking, he was above that behavior. Not to mention, next to Colin, he was kind of the big guy here, what with his wall of a body. ] Oh-- Really? You don't have to!-- I'm not gonna go and look a gift horse in th'mouth though..

[askthevolunteerstate]

If I gotta air out my dirty laundry on th’ internet fer faceless strangers’ amusement t’ be considered tough, then I don’ give a rat’s furry ass!

*huffs stubbornly*

This is bullshit. That’s what this is right here. Damn magic anons..

[bluebonnetking]

Good call, buck-o. 'Cept, didn't you get that whole.. truth-tellin' thing? What you supposed to about that? I mean, I guess, you could just.. not respond to 'em? Or is that somethin' you have to do?

[askthevolunteerstate]

*flustered* Alan ya better not be th’ one behind all this or so help me—!!

[bluebonnetking]

Nah, I ain't! Cross my heart, hope to die. [ He makes an X over his heart with his pointer finger. ] Just think y'er bein' weak, is all.

[washingtonias-archive-deactivat]

[He’s still got a puzzled look on his face when the cow comment reaches his ears and causes his jaw to drop open; he isn’t quite sure how to respond to that, so he snaps it shut again and folds his arms, looking to the side.]

I wasn’t aware eating whenever one pleases made them a cow.

[bluebonnetking]

[ For a little bit, he just gnaws on the apple, wondering if he ought to actually go cook something. When he looks at Colin next, however, he realizes he's made a mistake and scrambles to reassert himself. ] -- Okay, that ain't-- S'not what I meant!

[washingtonias-archive-deactivat]

I still can’t help but question.

[He gives him a look as if to ask what was wrong with it; after all, he is the one who grew it. The only apples that will ever meet his hands are the ones produced in his state.]

When has that stopped anyone? I graze all day.

[bluebonnetking]

[ In the end, Alan gives into his hunger and takes a bite out of it. That, and because it looks like he's going to offend Colin and that's the last thing he wants to do. It's not bad, he guesses. Could be better. ] Yeah, well, I ain't a cow chewin' cud all day. And, I dunno, just didn't wanna get up and go to the kitchen.

[thenaturalstateoffical]

Hmm..  I think your legs just have a bad case of lazy ass. 

[bluebonnetking]

Maybe, maybe not! All I know is they ain't workin'.. [ ROLLS OVER. ]

[washingtonias-archive-deactivat]

You ‘ain’t’? [tosses him an apple and leans over him, hands on his hips] And why not?

[bluebonnetking]

Don't go questionin' southern vernacular, Colin, it doesn't ever work out. [ He picks up the apple and looks at it, but doesn't eat it. He prefers Granny Smith. He just kinda stares at it a while. ] And, I didn't 'cause.. well, I woke up too damn late and I couldn't be assed to do anything!

[thenaturalstateoffical]

…Why?  Your legs ain’t broken.

[bluebonnetking]

No, no, they are. I swear. Can't even move 'em an inch!

[bluebonnetking]

Man, I ain't ate anything all day.. [ Continues to lay around with no real intent to get up and eat. Feeeed him. ]

[officialunitedstates]

What was in North America before the United States was established?

Literally billions of possums.  They dominated the landscape and blocked out the sun

[pequodbucks]

Never said it was a bad thing, I just stated your title. -adjusts his hat and sock gloves- You don’t look the type to do that, but who am I to say anything on appearances?

[bluebonnetking]

... [ Huffs. ] Okay--- ...Uh. How're... How're you?