One Nice Bug Per Day
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

gracie abrams
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shark vs the universe

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almost home

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@bo-barrett-magic
I like powerful men with equally powerful women, who save each other’s asses because that’s their thing and God help anyone who harms their SO. I like the badass motherfucker with the head bitch in charge, taking over their domain like nobody’s business. I love the story of the hero who saves the world and the heroine who saves him. I love the couples who will burn down the world just to protect each other. That is my aesthetic.
in my defense, i was left unattended
Poseidon & Caeneus
jared-kingston:
Jana’s blood boiled underneath her skin, every fiber of her being screaming at her to lash out. However, before she could react, the door was closed and the loud click of a lock being put to use informed her that she was trapped.
The brunette growled in frustration, kicking at the foot of the bed. She should have moved faster when she’d had the chance. No – she should have just drowned at sea. Though… of course, Boaz was the god of the sea. He probably wouldn’t have let that happen, either.
What he couldn’t stop though, Jana figured, was her escape through other means. Looking around, she began to formulate ideas. She’d read of daring escapes made by dashing heroes in the novels she preferred – she’d always sort of identified with the male protagonist for some odd reason, though she knew better than to admit that – and she took note of the items at her disposal. There were windows, and bedsheets, and several dresses that had been laid out for her. None of them struck her fancy, so she felt no guilt in destroying them in order to escape.
But first things first.
Jana lifted the hefty, flouncy blue skirt of her gown and removed that godforsaken bustle. Whoever invented bustles, she determined, was either a complete misogynist, or a complete idiot (though she would concede that those two often went hand in hand). She’d never worn the garment at home and she would not start now.
The brunette, now being free of any excess fabric or boning, grabbed the sheets off her bed and put them in a pile with the dresses, then looked out the window.
Damn.
She was at least three stories up, and it seemed highly unlikely that the bedsheets would be long enough to get her down to the ground. Even if they did, she reasoned, it was likely that Bo or a servant of his would see her shimmying down the makeshift rope and stop her.
Jana sighed in frustration and began taking off her dress. She decided that if she was at a disadvantage anyway, she wouldn’t let Bo have any easy wins. The bedsheets would become her new clothes. They’d be easier to move around in, at least.
Halfway through wrapping the bedsheet around herself, toga-style, the door opened. Jana whipped her head around to see a mousy handmaiden come in with a gorgeous ruby red gown trimmed with gold lace, and a box of cosmetics.
“My master sent me to ensure you would be ready for dinner, Miss Jana,” she said, giving her the slightest of curtsies.
Something about being referred to in that way made Jana cringe internally and she glowered at the poor unsuspecting handmaiden.
“You can tell Boaz to take his dinner and shove it up his arse,” she growled, garnering a horrified gasp from the handmaiden.
“I… I don’t believe I can tell him that, actually, Miss Jana.”
“Then have him come here and I’ll gladly do it for you,” she said, venom lacing every word.
The handmaiden looked down at the floor. “Please. I’m just doing as I’m told. And if you just do as he asks, it’ll make life easier on all of us… yourself included, Miss.”
“I’ll do no such thing. He might hold power over you, but he has nothing on me. I will starve if I have to,” Jana replied curtly.
Bo straightened the lapels of his formal jacket, brushing an arm off as he strode down the long hall laid out before him. He was on his way to the kitchens for a quick peek at the food and then to the dining hall to inspect the table to ensure everything was set according to his specifications. Tonight was his and Jana’s first dinner together -- he wanted each detail to be absolutely perfect.
A door slammed and pulled him from his thoughts, forcing him to cast a glance around to find the source of the noise. Moments later, a handmaid stormed past the adjoining hallway, hair disheveled and muttering to herself. Bo’s brows furrowed. That couldn’t be good.
He jogged along, catching her only a few feet ahead of him after he’d turned the corner.
“Miss,” he called out and she tossed a look over her shoulder before halting in place immediately when she saw it was him, her upset demeanor melting away into servitude. She reached up to flatten her hair as he neared her, but her attempts to right herself weren’t lost on him.
“What in Heaven and Earth happened to you?” Bo’s eyes were kind as he scrutinized her, attempting to put the pieces together. He’d sent her to take care of Jana, and she returned like this? The blatant disrespect of his guest caused his lips to bend into a frown.
“I tried to do as you asked, Sir,” the woman curtsied as she spoke quickly, a trace of fear in her eyes. “Miss Jana wouldn’t allow me to dress her. She... pushed me away and we... tussled. I fear I let my anger get the best of me for only a moment.” She hung her head in shame, prepared to take a verbal punishment from Bo for her actions. “It won’t happen again, I swear. I only needed a moment to cool my head and I was going to return to finish.”
Bo reached out and tilted her chin up with a finger so he could meet her eyes. In any other case, he would be furious that his orders weren’t being followed, but he knew this one was a lost cause. He’d simply have to dress Jana himself if he wished her to be in the dining hall with him. Her attitude wouldn’t allow anything otherwise. He was beginning to wonder if he’d bitten off more than he could chew with this woman.
“No need,” he replied, giving her a gentle smile. “I will take care of our guest. Run along and see if your help is needed in the kitchens.”
His hand dropped away and the maid nodded, no doubt grateful she’d been spared his wrath just this once. “Of course, Sir,” she said as she curtsied once more and rushed off, leaving Bo to himself in the hall.
He turned on his heel, jaw set, and strode back toward Jana’s room.
Bo let the door slam shut behind him, announcing his presence.
“I have half a mind to turn you over my knee for subjecting that poor woman to your savagery,” Bo growled low in his chest as he crossed to her, reaching out to wrap a large hand around Jana’s upper arm to keep her from backing away. “You can curse me, spit at me, and fight me all you like, but you are not to lay a hand on my waitstaff, is that clear?”
He waited a beat for an answer and when he didn’t get one, he pressed again, his thumb sinking further into her bicep.
“Is that clear, I said.”
Bo pursed his lips and released Jana, turning his back to her so he could cast a long look out onto the grounds below her window. Surely by now she’d gone through every escape scenario and realized that climbing from the window meant a drop to her death. Not that he would let her get that far, of course. The thought pushed his brows together. It was fortunate for him that she seemed stubborn enough to want to live just a bit longer.
... And fashion her sheets into clothing instead.
He had to remind himself to stay incensed. The sight of her wrapped in a sheet made him smirk and heat coil in his belly, and that was not conducive to a proper scolding.
“I am not a monster, Jana,” he said, voice laced with irritation. “I wish to see you fed and well taken care of, both of which are non-negotiable.” He turned back to her, voice hard though his expression was calm. He was not going to let her play him like she had played every weak man on that ship of hers.
“I gather that you would rather meet your end due to starvation, but I’m afraid that just isn’t going to happen. So I present you with two options: you’re going to be a good girl and wear the dress, or you’re going to dine naked. But either way, you’re coming downstairs with me, even if I have to hoist you over my shoulder and hand-feed you myself.”
Poseidon & Caeneus
jared-kingston:
Jana flinched as the door slammed in her face, and then once more as Bo grabbed a hold of her jaw. Her expression hardened as she listened to him speak threateningly.
Oh.
So that’s how this was going to be.
Jana’s eyes narrowed as she prepared herself to lose any semblance of ladylike manners. Such pleasantries had no place in situations like these.
The brunette allowed a glob of saliva to form in her mouth and then, with a glaring look and less than expert aim, she spat, the glob hitting Bo in the space between the bridge of his nose and his left eye. She had meant to get in directly in his eye, but it wasn’t as if she was a working class boy – that is to say, spitting wasn’t exactly her forte.
Having been off in her aim, she settled on using the heel of her shoe to vigorously stomp on the god’s foot.
“No one will tell me anything, Boaz – especially not some long forgotten has-been of a god!” Jana snapped, pushing Bo away from her with all the might she could muster, and managing to create about three feet of distance between herself and the sea-god.
“Touch me again and I will scream so loud, you will curse your mother for not bringing you into this world deaf,” she added indignantly.
If her spitting in his face hadn't ignited his fury, her heel coming down hard on his toes did -- Not to mention the use of his full name. She pushed him back, catching him off guard, and he grit his teeth, impulsively bringing a hand up to strike her in return. He hesitated, and instead wiped her saliva from his cheek, flinging it away in disgust. All of his playful manner had been gone from the moment he slammed the door in her face, but now he was absolutely seething.
"You think me a forgotten has-been do you?" Bo spat back at her, cocking his head and narrowing his eyes. The space she'd created between them didn't exist for long -- each turn of phrase was punctuated with a languid step toward her. She thought she could threaten him, a god? The idea brought an indignant smirk to his lips. He could end her with a mere quirk of his brow.
"Funny -- When I saved your life, I seem to recall you knowing exactly who I am and why you should be very, very afraid of testing my patience like you just did."
Bo stood before her, not touching. He allowed her final threat to stand momentarily - it would do him no favors to have his staff unnerved by her screaming, even if they knew not to come to her rescue. Standing this close, he could feel her anger radiating off of her like fire, mingling with that undertone of fear that she worked so very hard to cover up. Even in the midst of his own fury, he couldn't help but notice her flushed cheeks and defiant stare only added to her attractiveness. It would be her only saving grace for the time being.
"However, as it stands... I find you insufferably cute when you're angry." At this, he reached out and took her hand in his, gentle as could be, and placed a kiss on the backs of her fingers, taking in her response with wicked glee. "I am going to take such pleasure in breaking you of those bad manners."
His fingers tightened around her hand, not allowing her to pull away. A second later, he'd tugged her toward him, landing her flush against his chest, before he turned and released her into the center of her room, fluidly and effectively removing her from the door.
"Dinner is at six," Bo said, reaching out for the doorknob. "I expect you to be on time. Someone will be sent to you to be sure you look the part."
It appeared he was finished with their conversation then; he opened the door and made to leave, confident that he'd won this round. However, before he could step through, he held up a finger, almost as though he'd forgotten to mention something else. He wished he could have stayed there indefinitely to admire the look on her face when he turned back to add the statement on -- she was furious, and he reveled in it.
"Oh, and do try to keep the noise down if you must throw a tantrum. My staff will be preparing the dining hall for supper, and it makes them uncomfortable knowing my guest is so obviously unhappy."
She was given a saccharine smile and Bo took his leave, locking her in the room with a flick of the key once he was in the hallway, pocketing it immediately after and setting off to ensure everything was in place. Jana may not like him now, but she would come around. And if she didn't? Well. That wasn't exactly his problem now, was it?
Poseidon & Caeneus
jared-kingston:
Jana couldn’t help but smirk, suppressing a scoff as best she could. Bo. How ironic. Even a god couldn’t stand his own given name.
The smirk quickly faded, however, when he asked her to introduce herself. She fought hard then to keep down the contents of her stomach. This whole situation reminded her of the romantic novels her older sister used to insist upon reading to her younger sister. “Sisterly bonding” she had called it. Jana had sat there with a scowl the entire time. It was disgusting to her how submissive the women in those books could be, and she’d be damned if she was going to become one of them.
“It’s Jana,” she replied, her mouth a straight line across her face. She remained entirely unamused. “Bo… while I am thankful that you saved me from what was almost certain death, this… feels like a trap. That being said…” Jana paused to get up. “I think I’ll be taking my leave now. Do you have my old clothes? I’d be much more comfortable in them.”
Jana shifted uneasily in her gown, the modest bustle underneath rubbing against her rear and her discomfort showing plainly on her face. She couldn’t wait to get out of the cage of baby blue silk and lace that pushed her (albeit small) breasts up into a more voluptuous position.
He almost couldn’t help but laugh. She thought she would be leaving? Ridiculous.
Jana would be leaving the moment Bo allowed her to leave, and not a second sooner. However, he wasn’t above toying with her a bit as she learned that very lesson.
“Of course,” he replied jovially, smile curving his lips as his blue eyes sparkled with mirth. “Please, be my guest.”
A hand swept toward the open door to her freedom as he stayed seated, watching and waiting with the patience of a thousand years to see what she did next. Surely she wouldn’t fall for such a trap so easily? He had much higher hopes for her than that.
Ah, but here she was -- her discomfort and unfamiliarity in the situation showing her naivety plain as day. Bo had to hand her a bit of credit; she wasn’t meekly stepping toward the door, she was striding towards it, his invitation not taken lightly. He should have been frustrated and put off by such a feisty woman, but he found the challenge only made him want her that much more.
Bang!
The heavy wooden door slammed in her face, a gust of wind coming from seemingly nowhere forcing it shut. He looked to her lazily, finally pulling himself up from his seat. Bo didn’t move toward her, just let the expression on his face shift from one of the polite host to the predator on a hunt, cornering his victim.
“However, I don’t think you understand, Jana.” Her name dripped from his lips like honey, and he savored the taste of it on his tongue. He took a step closer, and then another, and another, until he had her pinned to the door with the mere promise of his body inching in closer. Bo reached out then and firmly took her jaw in a hand, his fingers finding delicate bone beneath flushed skin, and tilted her face back to look at him. At this point there would be no mistaking his expression -- he was deadly serious, all prior humor gone.
“You’re in my home,” he said, voice low, rumbling through his chest. Even in his low-simmering upset, he couldn’t help but admire how wide those eyes of hers had gotten, allowing him to see their aquamarine coloring up close all that much better. “And I will tell you when you’re allowed to be excused.”
“Do I make myself clear?”
Poseidon & Caeneus
jared-kingston:
Jana was going to die. She knew it. Everyone on this damned ship was going to be drowned at sea. The young woman chuckled to herself bitterly. This was what she had wanted, wasn’t it? To avoid her betrothed at any cost? Well. What a cost.
She silently wondered as she clutched the side of the ship what exactly it was she’d done to anger Boaz. Perhaps the god of the sea wasn’t thrilled that she was so flippant about using her body for her own needs – he wasn’t exactly known to be in favor of independent women. Maybe that was what had caused this storm, she thought as she looked over the bow and down into the choppy waters. She quickly realized just how close her fate was.
Not many things frightened the incredibly capable daughter of a sailor. But drowning. That frightened her. She’d heard it could take minutes of severe pain before she lost consciousness and finally passed on to the next life. It sounded like one of the worst ways to go.
Jana steeled herself against the winds, her knee scraped and bloody, and her hair whipping around her face as waves crashed into the sides of the quickly sinking ship.
And then.
There he was. She’d read about him in storybooks, and her father had relayed to her myth after myth. But she never really believed in him. Even now, as he stood before her, offering his hand, Jana was sure she was imagining things. The man before her couldn’t be… No.
But if it was real… and he was here to save her…
Jana looked upon Boaz with an expression of awe as she reached out her hand to take his. Her slender fingers curled themselves around his palm.
Silence.
It was sudden, but it was complete.
Daylight streamed through a window facing the oceanfront. Jana awoke in an excessively ornate canopy bed, her body swaddled in beautiful fabrics. She soon realized she was wearing a dress – and an expensive-looking one, at that. Her tattered (but favored) trousers were nowhere to be found.
Looking around, the room she found herself in looked just as soft and beautiful as the gown she found herself wearing. White silk drapes framed the windows, and gold leaf designs decorated the cream colored walls.
Jana was about to get up when she saw him. He was just sitting there, looking at her. How long had he been there? It didn’t take a lot for her to realize that he’d probably been the one to change her out of her wet clothes and into the gown.
Her blue eyes met his.
“You… you’re Boaz… aren’t you?” she said quietly.
A look of distaste crossed Bo’s face at her question. He hated his formal name. There was hardly a thing he could do about it now, after centuries of it being engrained in mortal culture, but he took the opportunity to refute it any time he could.
“Please, call me Bo,” he replied, tilting his head gently as he let himself examine her. He couldn’t recall how long she’d been asleep, but it had seemed like days to him. It was strange how fast the years flew by but with her finally in his home, he’d been counting hours as they trickled by unnervingly slowly, waiting for her to awaken. “You don’t need to be frightened.”
He remained in his chair, finding himself amused by her reactions to her surroundings. His home was outrageously ornate -- just enough for a god of his stature, he supposed -- she probably wasn’t used to such fine furnishings, even being from a wealthy family. Either that, or she hadn’t expected to awaken still on Earth.
“A beautiful woman like you must have an equally beautiful name,” Bo added after a moment, setting her up to answer. He hadn’t needed to -- he already knew far more about her than she even realized -- but giving her a chance to speak for herself might do to ease that doe-eyed look she was giving him. Though he couldn’t complain, not really.
It showed off her blue eyes spectacularly.
Poseidon & Caeneus
bo-barrett-magic:
jared-kingston:
Storming down the hill leading to the beach, Jana pulled those godforsaken pins from her hair, shaking it out angrily and letting her light brown locks tumble down past her shoulders. She wanted to crawl out of her skin. She felt unclean. How dare her parents not inform her that a suitor in London by the name Colin MacFadden had accepted a dowry. How dare they make that decision without her consent? She was seething.
Jana wanted nothing to do with any suitors. She wanted nothing to do with being a mother, or being some strange man’s wife. Honestly, she would probably rip off her dress right then and there if she didn’t fear being seen by neighbors.
Arriving on the beach, she stood away from the water. Her fingers went to her hair and gripped tightly. She squeezed her eyes shut. What was wrong with her? Weren’t young women supposed to want to marry? Her mother was thoroughly disappointed in her, threatening that no man wanted to marry an older woman. Her older sister had married at 17. Jana was already 22. She didn’t feel like it, but society was telling her she was getting up there in age.
Jana plopped down on the beach, the rough sand quickly finding its way between the folds and ruffles of her ridiculous skirt.
Ugh.
Trousers would have been a much better choice for this activity.
At least she had the journey to look forward to. Her father, a sailor, used to take her out on the water all the time when she was small. She clung to those memories because, as she grew older, it was deemed less appropriate for her to take on such boyish hobbies. This would probably be the last time for a long while that she’d be out on the water – at least until her betrothed let her visit her parents back home. That is, if he allowed it at all. She sighed frustratedly. Well, maybe a storm would wreck their ship and she’d be swallowed by the sea. At least then she wouldn’t be consigned to a life she never wanted.
——-
Three weeks passed, and the young traveler was boarded onto the Cinque Ports, all her belongings brought on by attractive young sailors whose strong arms and scruffy features continually caught her eye. Thankfully, her mother and father didn’t seem to notice that their daughter was planning on seducing at least half of them before she reached London.
And seduce them, she did. In the first 2 weeks of the eight week journey, at least 12 of the sailors found themselves on their backs in Jana’s bed, the innocent-seeming woman changing into a more dominant personality once she had them ensnared, and using them quite obviously for her own pleasure.
She might have continued in this way, but in the third week of travel, the storm hit, and everything changed.
A hand ran through shaggy blond hair, and the other went to his pocket as he leaned against the ship’s rail, the wind whipping along his face and ruffling his coat.
He was supposed to be doing work, he knew that, but how could he focus when the woman he had admired from afar was only a few feet away now, making eyes at one of the other sailors? When he’d first seen her he hadn’t expected that she had a desire to be so brazen behind closed doors, but the longer he spent on the boat watching her ensnare her prey with that innocent act, the more he wanted to step directly into her trap.
For this trip, he’d taken on the tanned complexion of someone who hadn’t seen a day away from the sun, his skin golden and brown from working shirtless on ship decks or in tobacco fields. His hair had been bleached by the sun, and his eyes were a mossy green, intense and unwavering as they landed on her. Two weeks in, she finally started looking back in his direction. And as much as he hated that she was this way, that he wanted her all to himself, he was almost glad -- she was surrendering herself to her lust, and Bo had no qualms in indulging her.
Jana led him back to her room, late one night after they exchanged whispered words and flirty tones above deck, looking at the stars. As soon as the door closed, Bo couldn’t help but admire how she changed, naivety dropping away with the material of her dress. She pushed him into her bed and wasted no time unfastening him from his trousers, finding him hard as he could possibly be.
Her lip pulled between her teeth with a coy smile, and, climbing astride his hips, worked her way down his length, setting her own pace. She took her pleasure from him as easily, and Bo couldn’t resist digging his fingers into her thighs, leaning up and gripping into the flesh of her backside and smacking it, making her squeal and moan and throw her head back onto her shoulders, shifting her hips against him to ride him all that harder.
As much as he enjoyed it, the entire exchange felt empty to him, and he knew why. He didn’t want her fucking some random man. He wanted her to be fucking him, to be moaning his name, to be looking at him like he was the solution to all of her problems. He allowed her this one-off with the attractive blond, but in the future, the next time they would be like this, he was going to be in this place -- no substitutions.
It had been exactly that, a single night, much as it had been with the other sailors on board. He didn’t regret it a bit, and instead returned her passing glances with winks or quirks of his brow. He knew what was going to happen next, and that made all of this even sweeter, the knowledge that soon enough she was going to be his, even if she didn’t know it yet.
The storm came out of nowhere, seemingly.
The crew tried to maneuver around it, but what they didn’t know was that the intention wasn’t for them to get out alive. They could try to sail out of it, or weather it, but it was never going to end well for anyone but himself and the woman that had taken the crew by her own storm.
Rain drenched them, and wave after wave came crashing onto the deck, threatening to flip the boat. Bo stood by in the shadows in his own body once more, watching with darkened gaze as the men tried to take back control. Jana struggled along with them, demonstrating an impressive amount of knowledge on how to handle a ship as she secured down crates and gripped at the ropes that held the large sails in place. Lightning flashed through the sky, surrounded by large booms of thunder, and with a single, well placed strike, a jolt of lightning struck from the clouds, hitting the large support for one of the masts, sending it crashing into the deck below, creating a gaping chasm through the ship.
There was no way to recover, and most men abandoned their posts, searching for a way to safety, some pushing past him in the stairwell that led below decks. Jana was trapped against a corner, unable to move due to the gradually widening hole in the boat as it took on water. Her boots slipped against the wood and she fell, her trousers ripping in the knee as she tried to regain her balance against the rapid rocking of the boat in the torrent. Taking his cue, Bo straightened his coat and stepped out from his place, calm and collected steps leading him straight to her.
When he reached her, he didn’t look at all out of place or perturbed by the events around them. He simply reached out a hand to her, smirking.
“I would strongly suggest you take my hand.”
Poseidon & Caeneus
@jared-kingston
Bo kicked at a shell on the sand, the fragile thing bouncing off of his boot and skittering into the tide that had come up to lap gently at the beach. A frown settled over his face and he sighed as he continued to walk along the coast, his distraction for the moment swallowed into the waves as he turned his attention to the house on the hill up above. For as much grief as he gave the Americas, he couldn’t say that he minded their coastline. It was colder in some places in the north, and it lacked the rich turquoise water that made him think of Greece, but it was a decent representation. It seemed to pair easier with the people; hardy and stubborn, determined to shape the land into something that they could call their own.
Though it would never truly be theirs; not with a god like him in command of it. He had the water and the land. That was his cut of the deal.
His primary home was Atlantis, an island situated in the middle of the Atlantic. He only had himself to blame for that -- his own blasted stubbornness had caused him to create an island far away from where his family had situated themselves, hoping to get a reprieve from them. In the end, it had left him isolated and lonely, causing him to look for entertainment in other places. He created storms for fun, and haggled with traders that crossed the ocean, making off with some of their finer goods. As the nations grew into self-sustainment and stopped looking to Bo and his family as their gods, replacing them with others, he had melted into a semi-obscurity. Part of him felt resentment, but mostly he just felt boredom.
The century had turned (to the... nineteenth A.D.? Truthfully, he was finding it hard to keep them straight anymore) without celebration for him, just as it always had. There was no use in celebrating time when his life was eternal. It felt like another day, another year, another century. As often as he could, he roamed the countries, sailed over the sea, disguising himself as a mortal out of necessity in order to be accepted into their communities. It passed the years easier, and it quenched his unrelenting apathy for what humanity had become. He never stayed long, and he always kept moving, but it was interesting to see their fragility, their fears, and their dreams... and exploit them to an extent.
The North American continent was his least favorite, but he wasn’t there for a vacation. No, he was there because something had caught his eye -- something he was certain he would’ve never seen again. Centuries before, Bo had a consort -- his wife, some may have called her. He was known among the gods for his amorous nature, and he’d taken many lovers over his lifetime, but this woman had been special to him. And now, after years of roaming, he’d managed to stumble across a woman living the Americas that bore a striking resemblance to the woman he lost.
And he would be damned if he didn’t want her more than anything.
His thoughts were broken as he watched her storm from the front door of her family’s home above him on the bank, and he made sure to keep himself hidden as she rushed as far away from the building as she could get, emotions clearly playing a part in her actions. He wanted to go to her so badly, sweep her away with him to live in his home, but he showed restraint. A plan had been forming in his head since he’d first seen her, and he had a feeling that it was going to come time to put it into action very, very soon.
But he had to be patient.
Nathan in first episode of Con Man, season 2
perhaps it is the sibling duo you should watch out for. their anger is rumored to burn like a supernova; violence unrestrained.
(via brit-rps)