echoes

" bitterness is like cancer. it eats upon the host. but anger is like fire. it b u r n s it all c l e a n. ”

[eliaschase-blog]

     elias wasn’t often embarrassed. he had gotten himself into situations before that he didn’t necessarily care to be in, but he wasn’t one who was easily embarrassed. he had grown tired of worrying about how others felt about him over the years———— which made him sound older than he really was. he was not in a career that would do well if he were easily embarrassed either. teenagers & parents alike would constantly scrutinize him.       ❝ it takes a special person to handle working in retail, but sometimes even those people reach that ‘i’ve had enough’ level. i try not to get ‘em to that point.  ——  happy to help. ❞

[bobondurant-blog]

    bo felt twice as embarrassed when he realized the other person wasn’t embarrassed at all. it wasn’t because of the dumb accident with the boxes anymore, it was the fact that he was so... bad at social situations. he had grown up in the east side, but he might have just as well grown up in the evergreen acres. at least he had just as much manners as they did. meaning, none. 

    “i think there is that enough-level with all jobs.” at least he had, especially with his father. yes, he considered that a job. “thanks anyways.”

[bobondurant-blog]

@evanblzit

    Another day at the grocery store, another day trying to figure out what to cook for the man who agreed to eat, only like, three different dishes and ten ingredients. Bo was sick of what he called the Montrose diet in his mind - corn and white bread and beans and pork, day after day after day, and absolutely no seasoning whatsoever. It was curious Montrose had that specific taste in food; the Bondurants had had some fancy chef before Dottie Mae’s passing. He had done lousy fucking job if his client nowadays only ate the most tasteless food in Terrebonne parrish. Or maybe, maybe he didn’t want to remember those days, and ate the exact opposite food of what he had been enjoying 28 years ago.

    Or then Montrose simply wanted to be a pain in his son’s ass, like usually, and his pickyness had no deep psychological meaning. And even if it did, it was a whatever in Bo’s world. He just needed to be able to make Montrose take a few bites so he’d survive and no one could accuse him of starving his own father to death.

    He was strolling down the bread isle, closely observing the shelves (was there anything on sale?) meanwhile muttering to himself some well-chosen cuss words. The most pressing thought on Bo’s mind, was that could he afford getting some food for himself from the Red Fish or literally any other place where the food tasted like something and not like what he imagined nothingness tasted like, when suddenly, he bumped into someone. Not that hard, but hard enough to send the bag of toasts he was holding flying to the other end of the isle. He had a very pissed look on his face, and when he turned around, it turned into something even more bitter. Because he recognized the person. If he would have been, like a teenage girl, he would have called him an enemy - but he was a reasonable man, and an adult, so he just thought of him with great disdain.

    “So, in addition to bein’ the biggest bitch in the parrish, you are also the clumsiest fuckin’ person, apparently.” Bo said with a mocking frown. He motioned towards the other end of the isle. “Look what ya did to my toast.”

[belleloverson-archive2-deactiva]

Initially, the blonde didn’t react to his response. With a comic frown, she chuckled lightly and shook her head once. “You’re comin’ out of the darkness ‘n’ I’m the one to take your breath away?” She referred to his gasp, quiet but noticeable in the silence of their loneliness. Outside of the bar, the streets were dead - not that inside was that lively either. “Dayum, I sure ain’t lookin’ as good as I thought,” she giggled, joking. Belle’s humour was often positive, a breath of life she used to save herself from her own demons always trying to drown her.

“Sorry, I thought I left everybody plastered before I sneaked out. Sure you ain’t -” She stopped right there, finally realising how he addressed her. Frowning her lips in an ‘O’, the bartender then pouted, changing her mind about her reply. “Did - did I hear ya right? You called me ‘ma’am’?” It was awkward to be called that. Perhaps some habits remained in small towns but Belle certainly grew unaccustomed to The Bayou. She had spent too many years away in college and in that forsaken psychiatric clinic. At the latter, the closest thing to something nice was being ‘complimented’ by the guards. She despised it unless she had flirted with them first. “I feel like a lady,” she joked, a hand placed right above her heart, eyelashes flicking playfully as a theatrical sigh left her pink lips.

Straightening herself up from the wall she had been leaning on, she took another drag, puffing the smoke upward so it wouldn’t intrude the man’s personal space.  Elle extended out her hand, an invitation to join her in her illicit act. “Go ahead,” she encouraged him with a smile. “Work’s callin’, I ain’t got no time to finish it all by myself.”

She wondered if she knew him. After all, she was born there, raised there, went to high school and had her prom there. One of those towners had been her prom date - one that wasn’t too happy when she announced she was leaving everything behind to go to college and become a writer. A writer, huh. Now a bartender and cashier. Yet, she couldn’t recall his face. Her memories did fade a bit after what she went through - the drugs, the treatments, the trauma. She could only assume he moved in sometime during all those years she’d been away. Plausible assumption.

[bobondurant-blog]

    He was uncomfortable. It was her expression, the tone in her voice, the way she said those words - light and humorous, she was, and to be frank, Bo had no experience of neither of them. He didn’t know how to reply. He didn’t know what to do. So, he blushed. He fucking blushed. A grown ass man. “I- I mean, you just smiled, y’know, I ain’t used to- seein’ smiles... like that ‘round here,” he tried to explain. He bit down on his bottom lip, like he tended to do when nervous, and kept his eyes wandering, not quite daring to look at her eyes. He rarely looked people straight into their eyes. He probably should’ve cracked some sort of joke/compliment about her comment about her looks, but as said, Bo didn’t know how. So his words came out sounding way too honest and way too serious. “You’re lookin’ quite alright let me tell you.”

    That’s when he looked at her. It would’ve been dumb to say something like that about someone without looking at them. That’s also when he realized he knew her. He’d last seen her when they both were teens, but there was something memorable about her face, the sunshine in her eyes and the golden shade in her hair. The Loverson girl... She’d had a twin brother, if he remembered correctly - Belle, it was. Belle Loverson. 

    Bo kept it quiet though. She hadn’t given any hints of recognizing him. People didn’t, and if they did, they had nothing good to say about him. Not because they personally knew him, but because of... the shit that was his life. On the other hand, he was glad she didn’t recognize her, but then again, he was not. Had he really been that invisible?

    Irresistibly his lips curled upwards. “I’m afraid I did call ya ma’am. Southern habits die hard, I guess.” Her theatrical gestured were adorable. With a chuckle, the red in his cheeks deepened. He hoped she wasn’t able to see it in the darkness. “Pa always said, a gentleman should always make a woman feel like a lady.” His uncomfortableness was slowly melting away, especially when he took the joint she offered, and inhaled smoke deep into his lungs. “Thanks. I needed this.”

[untrustyou]

Yuichiro Noda

[eliaschase-blog]

      was he a good person? typically, elias liked to think of himself as a good person. he hadn’t always thought that way, and more often than not, he thought others were better people than he was. elias helped him stock the boxes onto the shelf, and he could tell that the other was incredibly embarrassed by it. the accident had garnered a bit of attention, but luckily some looked & left right away after a sympathetic look.     ❝ i’m sure the people who work here will be appreciative too, since it wasn’t something on their agenda to do today. —— i wasn’t much help before, so i feel a bit guilty that i didn’t catch it in time. ❞

[bobondurant-blog]

    he hoped his cheeks weren’t turning red. he really fucking hoped that. what possibly caused that... thing were the other people that passed them and saw his embarrassment. normally he did things by himself, but this time, he was real happy the man had stayed to help him - somehow it made all of this little less of a disaster.

    “probably, yeah, i’d think these sort of things - shitty customers leavin’ messes - make a retail worker’s day at work even worse.” he looked the man first time in the eyes. he was nice. bo had no reason to be unpolite. he was a southerner, after all. he even smiled, for real, this time. “no reason for guilt. thank you. i think all the boxes are back on the shelf now.”  

[belleloverson-archive2-deactiva]

It was quiet outside. Sunday nights were never crowded as the other days of the week. Maybe people were simply getting psychologically prepared for another dreadful five days of exhausting work and couldn’t afford burning stamina at a bar. Belle was there, though. For her, working at The Pit was fun and exciting - whenever on the clock, you could be certain she was tipsy. With her innocent charm and genuine smile, customers often paid her with tips and drinks.

Also, in the bar she had companions. Drunk ones, but it was better than the loneliness of her crumbling cold house.

Listening to the cicadas sing in the warm night, the blonde inhaled a deep drag of her joint. It was dark, it was late - and honestly, people already knew her for being the crazy one in town so her reputation didn’t bother her anymore.

“You ain’t sneakin’ up on me, are ya?” Leaning against the wall, she exhaled the toxic, smelly smoke. “’Cause you doin’ a lousy job, man.” When she turned, Belle had her usual blinding smile. It wasn’t a side effect of the marijuana, she just was pure light shining on others. “Could hear ya from a mile away, heavy steps,” she teased.

[bobondurant-blog]

    Today had been... frankly, one of the worst days of his life. Work had been horrible in a usual way - nasty customers et cetera - and that he could’ve handled. What he couldn’t, was when he finally got home, Bo had looked for his father for almost an hour, before finding him from Dottie Mae’s grave. Montrose had had some sort of breakdown, yelling at his son, crying, refusing to move, then running around manically, and hitting his son. He was a frail man, and Bo really didn’t mind the punches, but seeing his father like that was like another stab to his already broken heart. When he had gotten Montrose to bed and to fall asleep, the only thing he wanted to do was to get wasted.

    The Pit was his to-go place in those occasions. Not too fancy, but not nasty. No one knew him there like people did in East End - which he hated - so he loved the anonymity he had in South End, and the fact that there he was just another grim looking man drinking alone at a bar. Calling Bo’s mood ever “light” would be a horrible lie, but it was remarkably lighter when he got to The Pit than it had been when he left home.

    He gasped lightly, when the blonde woman there suddenly turned around and gave a bright smile in the middle of a dark night. He wasn’t used to people smiling to him that brightly. “Nahh, not my intention, apologies, ma’am,” he replied. “Just lookin’ for the bartender. I’m dyin’ for a drink.” He inhaled deeply, enjoying the smell of the smoke. 

[eliaschase-blog]

       he had tried to warn him. unfortunately, elias simply wasn’t quick enough. he hadn’t turned the corner quick enough to catch sight of the mountain of cereal that was about to crash down, but whose to say he would have been any use at all? there wasn’t much hesitation behind the domino effect that came along with cascading cereal. while elias hadn’t been much help prior, he could be of some help now. he didn’t really know the man, but he wasn’t one for walking away in cases like this. despite the fact that he was told that he didn’t need to help, elias started waved it off & attempted to pick up a few of the stray boxes that he could find. there wasn’t any store workers nearby, but no doubt any store worker wouldn’t be happy about it. they have quite enough to worry about, he suspected.      ❝—— really, i don’t mind. another set of hands will make clean up easier, yeah? ❞

[bobondurant-blog]

       bo still kept his eyes on the floor, and the damned boxes, when he tried to get them back to the shelf as quickly as possible. he was so fucking ashamed, that he wouldn’t look the person that had come aid him. 

    “yeah,” he muttered. “it would be kinda dick move to leave these lyin’ ‘round, so, thanks, though t’was my clumsiness that got them scattered.” bo gave a lopsided smile, more of a smirk actually, that certainly didn’t reach his eyes. not that it was noticeable - he still didn’t look up. he hated looking people in the eyes. “so you’re just bein’ a good person.”

[eliaschase-blog]

        visiting the market in oakland, whether it be for a prolonged trip or a quick in & out one, had the tendency to be hazardous at times. in a small town, it was likely you’d run into someone you knew. in a small town where you had been a teacher for several years before eventually becoming the principal, it was even more likely that you’d run into someone you knew. high school students either ducked & pretended not to see him, or they’d come right up to talk to him. the less desirable interactions were with parents——— but only a certain type of parent. in the short time that elias had been weaving through the aisles of the store ( only to pick up a few things that just happened to be spread throughout the store ), he hadn’t managed to run into anyone he knew. the most excitement so far had happened just in that moment, turning the corner & watching an avalanche of cereal boxes begin to fall on an unsuspecting individual       ❝ watch out——❞        too late.

[bobondurant-blog]

       bo absolutely hated grocery store visits. was it the feeling everyone was looking at him, or the fact he still sucked at picking groceries even if he’d been the one to, you know, handle the whole cooking business for the past fifteen years. this time was no different - he was boiling with anger, frustration and all the feelings alike when he slowly walked to the isle full of cereal boxes. his father had a very distinct taste which made cooking and shopping even more difficult. there was like ten things he agrees to eat, and rice krispies where one of them. much to bo’s bad luck, there was only one box left, on the top shelf, so he needed to reach for it. just as he was tiptoeing to get the damn box, his elbow hit a pile of lucky charms, and in a full domino-effect, like in slow-mo, they tumbled down and scattered all around the isle. even more embarrassing was the fact someone’d seen it; bo had heard the warning just as the boxes had began to fell.

       “typical,” he muttered to himself, bending down to start picking the boxes up. “you don’t gotta help or anythin’, this is embarrasin’ enough already.”