The Second Person To Ever Have Sex

ITS 18+ IN HERE BTW They/them 24 This blog is for all the posts I am too repressed to post on my main. Mostly for porn. Cnc stuff abounds so if that's triggering, take care of your boundaries. I practice RACK 😋

[puthy]

[thehandsomedevil88]

Still not what I want

[puthy]

What is it that you desire?

[pupgrrrlriot]

I'm goin crazy here someone help meee

[hentai-domains]

Visit Original Link

Slippery tentacles grabbed her and slowly began to…

[slygirlboy]

hi. i cant wait for tuesday so you get this now. smiles

[crimsonflowerz]

wolfy woman

[microposting]

multi chapter piece begins NOW

After decades of care, Puck's owner is dead, and Puck finds himself dragged off as a college pet by his owner's great nephew. He's long since accepted that a tiny's life is just being tossed from person to person without any input… but maybe an old pet can learn new tricks.

older male micro has sex adventures. plot-heavy character-focused. there will be depictions of rape but otherwise consider this a "creator chose not to use archive warnings" fic.

read on AO3

I think Bill died. He hasn’t come back since he called the ambulance yesterday and today Becca and her family came to his house. They were quiet. Becca said “I think Puck is in the office” and Miles said “I can get him” and he came in and took my cage out to the car while Becca + Trish + Rob got some other stuff. I was in his lap in the backseat and I guess they took me to their house.

Bill’s 69 I think which is probably young to die suddenly but he drank a lot and didnt work out really. ha! I should probably be freaking out if he is dead because who will be my owner what will they make me do etc etc but I kind of don’t feel strongly about it. I imagine it will be about the same and he might not be dead anyways. No one has said anything yet but they keep talking about “all these bills now” and “right when Trish is leaving too” and all of that so maybe he’s dead or its really obvious that he’s going to die soon or something. 

They left a lot of my stuff at Bill’s house without realizing it probably and I dont know how to bring that up. It’s just the extra clothes and toys and stuff so I don’t need it but it would be annoying if they never got it and they sold the cabinet with my stuff. 

O.K. Miles knelt down by the cage and said “Uncle Bill is in the hospital and he’s doing really really bad” with a sad face so that answers that. I nodded at him and he said “they’re going to try their best but if he doesn’t make it don’t worry because we’ll take care of you” and Becca said “Miles don’t promise that if we keep him we’ll never be able to let him out of that cage” and he said why and she said do you want the damn cat to eat him. I’ve actually had an okay time with cats before but I guess if one wanted to kill me I wouldn’t be able to do much about it. 

I said earlier that I don’t care about owners but I know these people so it is less of a “wild guess.” When Bill got angry he sometimes showed me Craigslist ads for tinies and said he’ll put me on there but it never sounded that crazy to me. Maybe there are some psychopaths on there but it would probably be mostly the same. 

They argued about the cat for a bit (name: Tux, personality: hungry+smart, has killed flies but no mice) and then cooled off. Later Miles asked me if I wanted to talk about anything and I told him about the things in the drawer. Rob said they could get those tomorrow so that is settled.

Family is watching TV + talking about school stuff. Trish is graduating high school now and both of them are going to college soon (I think different schools). I’m looking at old journals and I think Miles is 20 and Trish is 18. Miles is much ganglier than when I last saw him. Tiny wrists and huge hands. Maybe I notice that stuff because people hold me so much… Trish is full on athlete now. Tan and a very mean expression. Curly hair in big ponytail… I feel like girl jocks have always done ponytails.

I remember there was a family gathering where Bill explained cage setup to Miles (maybe 12 y/o?) but not finding it…… I have not interacted with any of them a lot but Bill calls Mikey (Becca’s dad) all the time and Becca sometimes and the family has been to the house sometimes. They know that I’m journaling which is usually first thing people ask when they see me (“what’s Puck writing?”). I also met Becca when she was maybe 12 which is weird to think about. I dont think we’ve ever had conversation but I can check.

Trish keeps looking at me and looking away. Rob and Becca used to do that (when Becca was a kid, when Rob started dating her) but now they are “bored” of me. TV is Cubs game now which I do care about… Bill+I had a bet on this one. Cubs win I get to pick new book… Giants win I stay in his sock 12 hr. I wonder if family will honor that one… HA!! He thinks rooting for Giants is funny but I think that one would be funnier if it was the Sox. I hate sock time but I haven’t gotten new book in six mo. 

Cubs won. Trish met friends for lunch and Becca went back to the hospital. Miles made sandwiches for him+dad. He made a small version for me with tortilla which made Rob laugh and I said thank you. Bill gave up on small meals a LONG time ago. I guess it’s fun to make at first but after a few months it gets annoying.

Cat was ALL OVER the table for some ham. 

Miles: Can’t I let him out? It’s weird that we’re eating lunch with him in the cage.

Rob: Absolutely not, Tux is gonna maul him.

Miles: Could I eat in my room then?

Rob: Go for it….

He took me out of my cage (hand wrapped around torso… HATE!) and I ate lunch on his desk. I don’t really care about the cage but I guess it is nice that he cares. 

him: How are you doing?

me: I’m okay, thank you.

him: No, but really… I’m sorry we took so long to tell you what happened. This must be really overwhelming. You understand, right? Even if he makes it, I don’t know if he’ll be able to take care of you. You’ll have a different owner.

me: Yes, I understand.

I start considering pretending to be sad… 

him: Do you have any thoughts on that? Anyone you wanna be with? … Grandpa? one of Bill’s friends?

me: Well I would rather not go on Craigslist…

Miles thought that was VERY funny. 

[microposting]

Ch. 2. Miles has an idea.

I did get dinner in cage this time. My cage is in middle of the dinner table for now. I get that I am being included in meals but it really feels like everyone is circling around me and watching me. This would not be so bad if I was on the edge but they’re scared of the cat. Again… cat has not shown interest. 

Otherwise spent a lot of time rereading journals. Found the Miles meeting… 13. I said that he seemed intrigued by me and I think that’s still true. Im reviewing family gathering and have not found any conversation with Becca. I did find conversation w Rob where he was drunk ha… Drunk people love tinies.

Miles kidnapped me for breakfast again. Cheerios with strawberries. I got a chunk of strawberry. (wouldnt mind some more…)

him: Why are you always writing? (there it is)

me: Bill’s always had me journal… journaling is good for you.

him: Does he read them?

me: No. They’re too small. I guess he could use a magnifying glass but it never seemed worth the effort. (learning that Miles likes “long answers” ─ Bill likes really short answers unless requested so uncomfortable shift)

him: (impish) Do you ever talk shit about him? 

me: I’m honest… I don’t think its possible to spend that long with someone without getting frustrated with them sometimes. (okay ─ I talk shit about him a lot)

Then everyone went back to the hospital. They WOULD bring me but no pets allowed. O.K. Like I’m going to tackle anyone or trigger someone’s allergies… haha

O.K. …Bill is dead. Becca seemed kind of shaken but otherwise people are neutral. Mikey was also at the hospital and came home with them. Long talk in living room about what to do. Cage was moved to the coffee table but what am I gonna contribute……

They did start talking about me… “Puck was really important to Bill” + “wife would never let me” + “we can’t we have a cat” + “a tiny is a lot of work”. 

Miles: I could take him with me.

Woah… room got quiet. Obviously Miles was curious but I did not see this coming.

Rob: I thought you couldn’t have pets on campus.

Miles: No, they have an exception for tinies. They don’t have to be ESAs or anything. I asked the brothers and they’re okay with it.

(brothers???)

Mikey (grandpa): A tiny is a lot of work… I’ve taken care of him while Bill was on vacation and it was a few hours of socialization a day.

Miles: So hanging out with him, right? That’s okay. I can do that and homework at the same time. 

Thank you… I don’t like when people call it “socialization”. If no one talks to me all day I go crazy… like everyone else on the planet…

I had not considered “Miles owner” until now. The couple conversations we had were very relaxed but he’s very young and obviously no experience. Bill had also never owned a tiny before me but he was an adult with a job. But you know who does have a lot of experience with tiny care? me

He asked me what I thought about it later… So fuckit good time as any.

me: I don’t think it’s a bad idea…. What do you know about tinies?

him: I actually got really curious a few months ago so I’ve been reading a lot but no hands-on experience.

me: Obviously I know a lot from what Bill did… so I think you can make this work if you’re okay with taking advice from a tiny

Which he seemed okay with. I wonder about this curiosity though and what he was reading. There are many different “schools of thought” on tiny owning as Bill often complained to me. Everyone is always telling him what to do with me. “They think I should treat you like any other stupid animal” vs “you’re a tiny you can’t handle that kind of freedom.” I know some owners are very punishment heavy so I’m just glad he’s not one of those. 

Becca told Miles to make a “care plan” with cleaning/feeding/training schedules and then she’ll consider it. Bill hasn’t done active training in a long time since I am pretty much fully trained but whatever Mom needs to see. I am making this very easy for everyone. If I was someone who shrunk one week ago this would not go so smoothly. 

I reviewed Miles’ plan. Feels like cheating… he definitely didn’t want Becca to know. Obviously he mostly got it off the Internet but he did schedule everything around his classes. Again I doubt the weekly three hours training will survive because what would we even do? But the “point” of this is to get past Mom so that’s okay.

Miles: I think this could actually happen. I’m getting kind of excited. 

me: Is owning a tiny the new cool kid thing?

him: I wish. I bet some of my professors will think you’re cool. There’s a bio professor who specializes in tinies and one of the English professors runs a “tinies in fiction” class. I think it’s every other year.

Actually sounds pretty cool. Obviously me and Bill talk books a lot but no tiny-focused conversations. Metaphor and symbolism stuff? Or history? Tiny authors? Many questions…

They did go back to Bill’s house to get the rest of my stuff. Very grateful for that esp. while they’re stressed about Bill dying. Miles spent a longtime looking it all over. He was figuring out the latch for the “black box” and I said “maybe don’t open that when Mom’s here” and he laughed and said okay. Which does beg the question of if he is “one of those” tiny owners. Maybe he doesn’t even know yet.

him: There’s some really cool furniture in here. Do you change the layout a lot?

me: No, that was always Bill. He said switching things up keeps me smart.

Current layout is very “dormy”/childish in my opinion. Colorful carpet, single bed, hammock is strung up, sports posters taped to the glass (“glass”... plastic). Most grown-up thing is stationary bike that fell over during the car ride which I should probably pick up eventually. When I feel like biking I guess… It all makes me a little embarrassed but maybe thats new people nerves. 

Do I want Miles to be “one of those” owners? I won’t lie and say it’s never pleasant but the bruises aren’t. People who play with you tend to like you a lot faster but also get more hot-headed. At least my experience with various babysitters. Sex can be annoying when you don’t want to. I am trying to read over here etc… Sometimes I throw up afterwards which makes people really angry. If he isn’t… I dont NEED to play. But the ones who aren’t “one of those” act like I’m an animal more. Miles is talking to me a lot so he probably will be. 

I have only “done it” with someone that young when Bill was there and none of them ever seemed to know what to do so I expect it will be interesting. 

Morning. I am extremely hungry. The parents “tried it” last night. Snatched me up while I was reading (of course). 

Rob said “let’s just try it out once before we agree.”

“It feels weird… he was my uncle’s.” 

“Don’t tell me you’ve known him your whole life and never got curious.” He pet my hair and held me up to eye level sitting cross legged in his palm. “And you’re okay with it, right little guy?”

I nodded. People ask that a lot but I’ve tried saying no and it doesn’t go good.

In the bedroom they stripped me themselves. Becca called me kind of cute and Rob got defensive. Then they made out while I ate her clit. I still struggle to “get into” playing with women. Bill says you are who you are but if I still have to have sex with them I would prefer to find them hot. I rode Rob’s dick (more my style) and rubbed my dick on his. That’s usually good enough for most men and a lot of women like to watch but Becca seemed pissy about us doing that and grabbed me and jerked him off with me in hand.

When people actually have a pre-play conversation with me I can warn them about stuff… but that always makes me throw up. They need to use a lot of lube and go slow otherwise its too painful and disorienting. I managed to hold off until he came and Becca let me go and I could say “I’m about to throw up.” I’m sure they could see it in my face because they rushed like crazy to grab me a tissue. 

No one got mad at me but when I looked up I saw absolute repulsion in their faces… ugh. I felt myself get red hot and managed to hold off crying. Could not look at their faces but heard the whole conversation afterwards while I sat on the bed alone. 

“I don’t think it’s for us… Maybe this could be good for Miles.”

“I’ll let him know tomorrow. Cheer up. He’s a smart kid, I think he can handle this.”

And then I went back in the cage. Was not told to “pretend this never happened” but it seemed pretty implicit. 

Obviously throwing up did not help the hunger… but also they have not been feeding me enough. I get three meals a day when they eat but I don’t get food when they’re snacking and everyone always underestimates how much I need to eat. I don’t want to piss off the parents more by asking them for food but I guess if Miles is trying to be a good owner he should know these things. Hopefully I will figure out how to get food before they find the cat eating my emaciated corpse on the dinner table. HA!

[microposting]

Ch. 3. Miles learns the ropes. Everybody wants a turn.

Miles was extremely excited about the news. Bit awkward considering they are still figuring out what to do with Bill’s body. When he was talking to me at the breakfast table I caught the parents staring looking uncomfortable. This happens sometimes — people fuck me and then whenever they see me they think about sex. They think that SEX GUY who I had SEX with is talking to our son and obviously that is uncomfortable. sex sex sex sex sex

He kidnapped me for breakfast again and wanted to begin “the training.” This started with: what do you think I should know first of all? I’m eating some of his scrambled eggs with my own dishes and trying to get comfortable cross legged on desk. It’s very obvious like this that my bowl (like most tiny bowls) is serving bowl size — and the egg portion looks comically small inside of it.

me: Okay… obviously I’m small. But I lose heat faster than you, so I need to eat a LOT of food compared to my weight. 

him: Oh shit. We’ve been feeding you like a normal guy. Jesus I’m so sorry. 

me: It’s okay… I didnt mention it.

+ I got immediately tripled portion of eggs. Nice.

him: omg (he said O.M.G. literally) none of us have even helped you bathe. Are you okay?

me: Yes. I sponge bathe with the water from the tank which people are good about refilling. I have a few more days of clean cloths before I need someone to do my laundry. I try to do a proper sink shower once a week. Your mom is cleaning out the toilet tank right now but you should learn how to do that. 

him: What about like haircuts and shaving?

me: I have my own scissors and I can cut my own hair. Don’t worry about shaving… Bill got me laser hair removal. 

He looks disturbed by that. Probably a “don’t bring it up” subject then. This is probably a good time to mention the dwindling hair dye supply… but I don’t. Now THAT was a “don’t bring it up” subject with Bill. Hair dye resupplies magically + hair dye does not exist. Hair dye evidence is cleaned before Bill gets home. I doubt these people know “the deal” but I am very reluctant to bring up. 

him: Why are you in a cage? Do you run away?

If I was a runner this would be a really good chance to lie. Miles is very lucky to have me as his first tiny. 

me: No, but when I was young and more adventurous Bill would lose me a lot and get worried. That’s why he got the cage. Now it’s more like having a bedroom. 

him: Why not get a room you can leave then?

me: You’re the boss now. But most enclosures run around $500. 

him: Oof…

He spent the next twenty minutes looking at increasingly expensive tiny houses. A modern three story house with “all the fittings” is hitting 15k now. But that’s something most people would put like ten tinies in…

(this took me a while to figure out how to say politely) me: by the way… if you grab me around the middle you’re risking injury. I’ve bruised ribs before. You can put your hand down and I’ll just get in. 

him: Shit. O.K., sorry. Do you want more eggs? (yes please…)

He spent a lot of the rest of the day messing with the other tiny supplies. Very impressed by the “floor” for sink showers. He set it up out of curiosity and then offered me a shower while it was ready. Sure… 

He came in while I was towelling off and went red and looked away (??)

me: If you’re going to own me you’re going to see me naked pretty often. 

him: ok ok just put your clothes on

Then time spent napping and writing in the cage. Feels really good to be clean and full. 

Everybody is “getting their turn” with me it seems. Trish came home drunk/high with gaggle of other girl jocks. Woke up me up while “quietly” “sneaking in” through the back door. Blonde girl noticed me immediately.

“Oh my god did you get a tiny?”

Trish said “No, he was my great uncle’s, we’re just taking care of him for a little bit.” 

I waved and blonde started giggling. She reached in and grabbed me out and immediately started playing with me. Pushed my shirt up and poked my stomach and pinched my legs and moved them around. 

The other girls were raiding the kitchen. 

Trish: Um… be careful with him. Mom and Dad are gonna get pissed at me if he gets hurt.

blonde: He’s cute. What’s his name?

Trish: Puck. I don’t think that’s his real name.

blonde: He kind of looks like Mr. Branca.

other girls: omg omg he so does that’s crazy

They hung out on the back porch. The blonde kept playing with me. Squeezed my face. Going omg look how tiny his fingers are. My clothes didn’t come off but her finger went to my crotch and rubbed me through my shorts.

other girl: What are you doing…

blonde: His little dick is so cute. Sorry. Aww look how’s he wiggling. Imagine if this was Mr. Branca. Wouldn’t he be so cute teaching the Civil War like this?

other girl: Girl, quit being such a home wrecker.

She made me take a joint hit and sat me down in her lap and pet my front. After they left Trish took me back in and said sorry and please don’t tell anyone and I nodded. She disappeared for a bit then came back and took me to her bedroom. Put me down on a pillow and straddled it and grinded on me with my dick between her lips and her clit on my face. I don’t think she noticed I came. She pounded harder and harder until she was moaning and gasping and rolled off me onto the bed. She saw the cum smeared on my dick and panicked.

her: Wait shit shit shit can you get me pregnant?

me: No… I’m sterilized. 

her: Okay. Thank god…. My boyfriend is going to another school and we just broke up. I don’t know how to deal with this.

me: College is a big change. In a year you’ll have a totally different worldview and you’ll wonder how you ever dated someone like that. 

her: Fuck…

If someone invented a vibrator that could do therapy they would be a quadrillionaire. 

[microposting]

Ch. 4. Funerals are weird. Miles gets touchy.

Funeral was weird. I never get to wear my suit so that was nice. I spent most of the time with Mikey. Mikey is about 10 yr older than Bill and a lot of people wanted to say “it’s fucked up that he died before you did” but you just cant say something like that. 

Lots of friends Bill’s age, family of course, a good number of his students… Some of them seemed my age and gave me odd looks so it’s possible that I knew them “in the before times” but I didn’t recognize any faces. Of course we have all aged. People talked at me a lot. I think Mikey noticed because he got me some ham and cheese from the food table and found a quiet corner to talk in.

Mikey: How are you doing?

me: I don’t know… seeing his body makes it feel more “real.” But his health was declining and we were spending a lot less time together so we haven’t felt “close” in a while. How are you?

Mikey: He got a lot angrier before he died. Our phone calls were just politics politics politics. I want to miss the man I watched grow up but all I think about is seeing his name on my cell phone screen and feeling dread.

me: Yes… definitely used to be more gentle/intellectual… 

I’ve spent a few weeks with Mikey taking care of me before so we know each other a little but not that well. Weird to think we are probably the two people in the world who knew Bill best. And here we are talking about how not-that-sad we are while people are crying in other room. 

Trish left for orientation. Miles is basically packed. He keeps taking pictures of me and sending them to “the boys.” He says they’re funny pictures but it’s always just me reading or biking. I guess it’s because I’m usually side-eyeing him. He said “the boys think you’re based.” O.K. I’ve been pretty cut off from young people since Bill retired so I just nod. 

He asked if I ever went to college. No… I probably did plan to but shrunk first so oh well. Obvious choice now would be major in English but I don’t know what young me would want. I also really liked archeology. Can’t see myself doing any non-desk job as an adult though…

He’s got 90% of the tiny stuff figured out. Parents are handling my insurance thank god and my next visit is due in eight mos so worry about that later. I showed him Bill’s go-to tiny supply site and he got super excited about all the options. We didn’t even look at the small stores… Shopping spree may be in my future. 

Tiny teaching owner how to be owner sounds like comically bad idea… but I can’t think of a way to exploit not that I would. “Yeah… if I don’t get a dozen new books right now I get tiny cancer. It’s basic biology…” Feels like kid telling babysitter “Mom always lets us eat candy and stay up late” but I don’t want to eat candy and stay up late. I want to eat veggies and go to bed at 10 and ride my bike. 

Miles says “the Internet says I should get comfortable handling you.”

I say “You don’t need an excuse to play with me you can just do it. That’s one of the perks…”

He turned red and mumbled something defensive. O.K. sorry but I had to say it eventually. Again it’s all a lot of work so if there was no upside why would people do it… Id be out of a job ha ha.

So he took me and played w me. Very innocent. Pushed up shirt and looked at chest and asked me to take off socks to touch feet but that was as intimate as it got. “Was the hair removal full body?” O.K. fine yes… Wanted to know how my hands felt between his fingers, how much force he could use when he moved my head. He said “sorry I know you prefer to sit in my hand… but I want to know how to hold you in other ways just in case.” And tried gripping me in different orientations with his fingers in different places. I was allowed to give feedback. Bit tight… you’re twisting my arm a little. 

Can’t tell if he doesn’t want to have sex or if he’s scared to bring up or if he doesn’t know it’s an option. No one this intrigued by me + my body has held off this long. I could just tell him “sex is also one of the perks” but he would take that as “I want to have sex with you” which as mentioned before I’m conflicted on. He’s prob. straight but that hasn’t stopped anyone else before ha…

Parents had “talk” with me which is most direct communication we’ve ever had. 

Becca: Do not let yourself become a distraction. He’s doing really well in classes. If you’re taking too much of his time you need to come back to us.

Rob: If he’s doing a bad enough job and risking your health you also need to come back to us. 

If that happened would they not pawn me off on someone else? 

They struggle to phrase a third demand and settle on “you’re still much older than him don’t make him uncomfortable.” Five inch tall sex predator over here… Now I have to figure out if I’m not allowed to hit on him or if that was a coded message telling me I’m not allowed to let him fuck me. What am I gonna do to stop that? 

[microposting]

Ch. 5. Off to college.

Miles has his own car. Buckled me (cage) into front seat and asked about music tastes. Bill’s not a full deadhead but he had a streak… Me I kind of like radio pop these days but that’s not “cool” to say. I told him fine w whatever. He plugged in phone and put on pretty inoffensive rock. O.K.

Miles: You like my ride?

me: Yeah…

Miles: I’m kidding, I know it’s a piece of shit.

Well I wasnt going to say it…

Three hour drive… “Before” I used to like drives but Bill has tried plenty of “tiny seats” and all of them still make me anxious. Cars are not tiny-friendly things. What I do like is that people will say whatever on a long car ride. Yap yap yap… good time to listen if you are smart.

Miles going on about “the brothers.” Yes: Frat bros. I know stereotypes but have never met a real frat. So far not a lot of sports and drinking talk.

Darius: obvious best friend. English major. Some theater. I think Miles is engineering? Theater dept is “complicated” (he winces)

Peter: President. Keeps saying “he does what needs to be done” ─ evil??

Jesus: “fun guy” + seems to be flunking

Chris: Stupid annoying useless asshole (very objective) 

He noticed I was taking notes and stopped listing bros to ask about notes. I would like him to continue listing bros. It is important to keep track of these things when you are my size. Forget the wrong name ─ bad time. 

No more names but frat has “sects” (cliques) I need to keep track of. Current debate is pro party v anti party. Miles pro party ─ but he does not party himself. “How the fuck else can we recruit.”

Miles rambles. Bill did not ramble. Miles is not hard to read. I am hesitant to say because it sounds self absorbed but I think he wants me to like him. Keeps asking if I like the music. I say yes and I dont think he believes me. Music is fine but I will admit I do not form opinion before I answer.

Pull into lot behind frat house. It is a slightly beat up two story home. He brought me into his dorm first and set me on edge of the desk, then started on his back and forth unloading trips.

Dorm has one bed ─ only big enough for one bed. Weirdly long, door to window is like a hallway with bed and closet one on side and desk on the end. Dresser under bed. First floor. I have a good view of a weedy patch and house next door. Walls ugly navy blue. NOT painted by a pro.

Miles dropped off first load. Voice from hallway says “is he in there”...

Miles: Yeah, you can say hi.

Don’t really want to. Too much going on already.

Guy walks in… how to say politely…. or not politely… Miles but black. Same build and t shirt + cargo shorts, same walk. He is I think trying to grow an afro and a beard… beard not going great. 

him: Hi… I’m Darius… (little kid voice barf)

me: Puck. Miles mentioned you on the car ride. You like theater.

him: Yeah… I like playwriting but I mostly act for the small shows.

me: Cool… 

Then he got bored and left. Also not sure how to say politely… realized that was my first time talking to a black person in… 20 years? When Bill still did hook ups there was one young guy and I had a nurse once (Janine) but I think it has been 20 years. Not much to do with this info except try not to put my foot in my mouth. 

Miles came back and started unpacking and talking more. His class schedule is complicated… will record on next page… but the big detail is BUSY TUES+THURS 9-1. He sleeps around midnight. He does not party but will drink with friends until 2 some weekends. Is that not partying?

him: Are you cool with that?

me: You think I’m gonna tell your parents?

him: No… like is that chill with you.

me: Sure… as if I never drank when I was your age.

Well… more than drinking. But I’ll wait to see if he’s “cool with that”.

He started asking questions about “when I was his age.” Mr. Questions over here… I have actually not had to answer this many personal q’s in a while. Putting me on edge. 

Bros hung out in big living room and Miles brought me with sitting on the arm of his chair. Lots of guys… probably will make a reference in the back as I get info. A few girls ─ some are girlfriends and some are “one of the guys” and it is pretty obvious which are which. 

At some point (I assume in group text) they started calling me “the little dude” and every time they did Miles seemed embarrassed and corrected them. “No… use his name…” Again don’t care much… but I didn’t want to attend this in the first place. Miles got invited to smoke outside and decides I’m better off in cage for the night. Fine by me. 

Hard not to wonder where I would have fit in to the “college scene.” Self control was never my strong suit… but also a big time nerd. Party geek must be an option. I don’t know maybe some whole other direction. Fall in love with the performing arts. ha ha.

[microposting]

Ch. 6. Puck gets the college experience.

Miles wakes up 9 and leaves to shower. Comes back half dressed. Looks at me. “Oh morning, sorry I forgot you were here for a second.” Ive been up for a while. Biked towelled down reading when he came back. 

He invites me out for “porch breffy” which is just eating cereal on the porch with Darius. I am allowed to choose from a variety of expired foods and have some instant grits. 

Darius: What’s your first class? 

Miles: Abstract algebra at 11.

Darius: If you talk about that too much I’m gonna kill myself. 

Miles: What about you?

Darius: Tinies in fiction actually…

I think they noticed me pay attention. Darius raises his eyebrows.

Miles: Yknow Puck’s always reading. He’s got this huge chest of books… huge for him. I think half of them are journals… but I’ve seen you reading a lot of classics.

Only journals and classics. Huckleberry Finn Shakespeare Great Gatsby. I have very good grasp of “the canon” but more and more want to see whats up with “Y.A. garbage” (Bill). 

Darius: He can tag along if he’s down. I think Marcus would be cool w/ it.

How I wound up in Darius’s backpack pocket getting carried across campus.

I will be taking notes in class today like a “real student.” I am the only person using actual paper… feeling like a grumpy old man looking at these kids on laptops. 

“Marcus” came in late. Mid-40s man (ethnicity ?) with thick chin length hair wearing jeans and t shirt. He was busy unpacking his stuff so he took a second to notice me.

him: Oh! Hi! What’s your name?

me: Puck. I came with Darius.

him: Puck like the fairy?

me: Yeah. That’s why I’m called that…

Darius let me skim the reading on his laptop while we were waiting. It is an intro to how tinies are used in stories. I think the author is a tiny. Pretty dense stuff. His notes have sections: Comedy / Sexuality / Vulnerability / Animal. O.K. sounds about right. 

Discussion: “what do you think when you see tiny character”

-my mom always thinks its funny

-usually in artsy stuff a tiny is a metaphor for a diff. character

-they’re “safe” - characters can confess + get advice

(everyone looks at me after they talk. I think this would go better if I wasnt here)

Marcus: Puck… what do you think people think when they see you?

me: I think they want to fuck me…

Laughs. I wasnt joking… but I guess cute old guy being blunt can be funny. 

Marcus: What do you mean?

me: Everyone knows the jokes about fucking pet tinies and they want to try it. But it’s a joke so it has to be secret. Everyone thinks they’re the only one. And when we’re alone they fuck me… 

Everyone was dead quiet and staring at me. I felt hot and my hands were shaking so I put my head down and wrote. 

Marcus: O.K…. Thank you Puck. Anyone else? (silence)

-yeah… I think about the sex memes

-its hard to not think about porn

-my friends parents had a tiny and she always seemed tired. tinies in shows are always cheerful.

Conversation totally derailed. I feel really really bad. Keep feeling eyes on me but I haven’t looked up. 

Marcus asked Darius to stay so I could talk with him after. 

Marcus: I’m sorry if I put you on the spot. Your contribution was really helpful.

me: I got everyone off topic…

Marcus: No, everyone was avoiding the obvious. Come back whenever you want. 

I really liked the deeper reading discussions. Obviously lots of that with Bill… but (no offense) he taught high school English and it showed. Going to reread some of those talks tonight. Last book we read together was Far. 451 which I think was last year. 

Darius sat on the porch with me and did a reading while I rested my eyes… old dude style. Now Miles is in his class. He is apparently a full on math geek which surprised me. I guess I expected inch thick glasses…

Darius: Hey Puck… do you actually think everyone wants to fuck you?

me: Not everyone. Some people think it’s too weird. But it’s what peoples minds go to. (long pause) Are you gonna say you’re different?

Darius: No…

me: That’s O.K. It’s just how it is.

My first caf meal of many. Staff let me in but not before going awww awww look at him. All ladies… mostly around my age. Lot of looks from students. 

Hard to write… reminder: dets tomorrow…

Finally Miles “went for it”. Movie night w/ boys. Took edible and offered me some. Fuckit… Edibles are VERY STRONG NOW! Halfway through I could not figure out the plot. I think Miles dosed similarly because towards the end he said goodnight and brought me back to his dorm. 

Both on his mattress… him laying and keeps looking at me smiling.

me: Hi…

him: sorry sorry sorry

me: What.

him: Nothing… 

But his hand creeps towards me and pinches and rubs my shirt.

him: Can I please…

me: Yeah…

He takes off my top and looks at me again. Says “omg what am I supposed to do”

me: What?

him: Like what do I even do…

me: Fucking… whatever you want. 

him: (covering his face) I don’t know…

me: What? How do you not know you said you wanted to (usually not this blunt (usually not this high))

Miles buries his face in his elbows and rolls over away from me and makes some high pitched noises.

me: What!!

him: its so hot that you’re mean

me: Huh???

him: stop stop stop stop

I shut up while he composed himself… but I think I was making an expression because when he turned back to me he giggled and hid his face again. He got his act together and took my pants off and pressed his face into my body. Potato chip breath. Not bad necessarily.

He made out with my dick and my taint. I’ve always kept my eyes closed when mouths were on me. It can be kind of scary the way faces distort that up close. I glanced around though… his eyes closed. One arm behind me to prop him up. Ass in the air… other arm pumping his dick. Clothes still on. Strikes me I still havent seen his body. 

When he comes his face presses my body into the mattress and he gasps. He says god yes oh my god yes and seems to get ready to sleep then looks at me again.

Miles: Oh. You probably want to go back to your cage.

me: A little…

I dont think I’m mean. Blunt sometimes. Have been told I have “R.B.F.” (Resting Bitch Face). Maybe a little sarcastic… unless Miles is seeing something I am not. But I guess if that’s not a bad thing…

[microposting]

Ch. 7. A new book.

Today is Miles’s “busy morning”. Before he left he brought me some fruit and said good morning and gave me a little morning-after smile, like “cant believe we did that”. Well I can, so I waved and kept reading which he didnt seem to mind. I guess this is playing into the whole “so hot that you’re mean” thing which is going to continue inserting itself into my thoughts for a while most likely. If he likes it I should probably keep doing what I have been doing but when people are too “riled up” I find they get a bit hot and cold…

Miles… not straight. Also… attracted to me. I fuck a lot of people but find very few are attracted. Bill yes… but less so over time. Some of that is me some him some passage of time… I cant be mad since it was pretty mutual. Some of Bill’s friends… it is rare but I am not having much reaction to Miles’s crush because in my experience it tends to fade when people realize I do not do that much. Book nerd exercise bike thin well groomed quiet man I think brings certain class stereotypes to mind… class that I do not have. People realize that books and biking is my version of “stare blankly at TV 16 hr a day” and it becomes a turn off.

Rereading Lord of the Flies now which I dont even like. In between journal rereads of course. Big changes… era of reflection. Maybe too much reflection… oh well you can only jack off so many times in a day. 

Miles came back with bread and soup. He says caf ladies thought my tiny tupperware was so so so cute. Also learned… caf menu available online, so I can place my orders on days I stay in. Era of convinience. Get me one of every dessert so I can throw up everywhere. Very mean and sexy of me.

While I eat Miles looks over cage furniture. That home decor. spark in his eyes. I think he was tired of me saying “fine w/ whatever” because now he presents me options: this floor or this one? this blanket or this? Result is half oriental half tasteful bachelor… first time bamboo floor has been out in a while. Hammock is gone… big couch is back in. 

Miles: Maybe I could get some stairs so you could leave out the top.

me: Walking around on your desk doesn’t sound very interesting.

Miles: (starting to joke) I could get more stairs… set you loose in the house…

me: Every nook and corner of a frat house at my disposal… so many drugs to find…

Miles: Bring them back and we can split the profit.

Which got a laugh out of me (which made him smile).

Finally he opened the “black box” + eyes actually bugged out.

me: I know it looks like some depraved pervert collection… you have to remember that is all maybe $200 total. 

He looks through for a while. Picks out lingerie and I watched him imagine me in each one. (Those are mostly old… again, Bill lost a lot of interest.) Amused by “long dildo” which I explain has a handle and is meant for other people to use on me and I am not some deranged size queen. The doll clearly freaks him out.

him: What’s your favorite?

me: It is embarrassing… but the doll. 

Its face is weird and its stupid poseable limbs are always turning backwards and the silicone is a gross flat orange color. Usually if I fuck it my eyes are closed but it is something else to feel those limbs and fingers and dick my own size pressing against me. 

him: Well… tell me if you ever want something from in here I guess…

O.K.… no doll time for me then. 

Hanging with bros on porch before dinner. It was ask Puck anything hour I guess. 

Jesus: Is it like gross to see everybody’s skin so up close all the time?

me: You get used to it faster than youd think. 

Lily (“bro” girl): Do you ever dive into a big bowl of food and just eat and eat. Wouldn’t that be awesome. (joke question but I will answer anyways)

me: No. I have to eat so much food that it feels like that all the time. It’s awful.

Peter: Is Miles perving out on you yet? (Miles looks nervous)

me: You’re the one perving out right now… consider that.

Henry comes out with a speech about drinking beer on the porch. This is the kind of behavior Miles was complaining about from “that group” but I actually do not know if his concerns about “admin” are valid. They might be but Miles says everyone is drinking from opaque containers so it is fine. If I was “admin” I would be a little suspicious of all these brightly colored plastic cups… but that’s just me.

Darius approached us in caf w/ news… his prof. says please come back to tinies in fiction class. Darius invites me to do today’s homework with him after dinner so I can be prepared.

Darius is officially “what are you writing” #5 and we are on day 3. 

We watch a short film free on youtube in bad quality. A woman shrinks and her life becomes a horror movie. The actor is actually tiny and the effects to make her “full size” in the start are very bad. After a stepping scare her husband puts her in a cage.

Darius: Wow…

me: It’s scary because of all the music. That happened to me and it was pretty whatever. 

Darius: Oh right you are in a cage… I guess it didn’t register cause it looks like a room.

me: It is a room and it’s nice. Its my own space that I don’t feel constantly on edge in. 

Darius: O.K. but is this one about real tinies or is it about the patriarchy? 

Points… Next we read a short story where a man takes out whatever kind of day he is having on his tiny pet. 

me: I hope this isn’t representative of the whole class. My life is not some eternal nightmare like these people seem to think. Mostly I’m just bored. 

Darius: You should say that in class. Marcus will love it. 

After class Marcus gave me a book. Tiny size. Collection of short stories by tiny authors about tiny characters. 

Marcus: I’d love it if you could stay after class once a week or so. I’m considering swapping in some of these to the syllabus… maybe even the whole collection. Would like your thoughts.

This seems like an excuse to put me in the “student” role without offending me as someone older than him. Not that I would be… student role is very comfortable to me, and even if he is younger he clearly is more educated on this. 

me: Well… I’m sure Darius has places to be.

Marcus: I already asked him. 

Darius waves at me.

I think it over for a second… the idea of even pretending I’m telling him what to do w/ his own syllabus is wildly uncomf., and I do wonder what he thinks hes getting out of this. But the book in my hands is magnetic. I haven’t had a new book in months… and this one is different. Authors I have never heard of. Some of them might suck and that is really exciting me. 

me: I’d like that. I’ll ask Miles and let you know. 

He says if Miles says yes we can talk about the first two stories next week but I can keep the book regardless. I think I might read them all by then. 

[microposting]

Ch. 8. Ouch.

Past few times Miles has been inching up the risk… trying to figure out exactly how “durable” I am I guess. Finally he was humping on me + dickhead caught on my foot. Twisted around wrong and hurt bad. Miles picks me up and brings me to face…

Miles: Shit shit I’m so sorry are you O.K.? 

me: Ugh… yes… this is my bad leg… gets twisted really easy…

Miles: I didnt know you had a “bad leg”...

Started asking me lots of other questions… when was the last time you got X examined, what meds have you been on, when did you last get hurt bad… I tell him everything is in the journals I just have to dig it up. He says O.K. please do that. 

He looks me over again… 

him: Are you growing out the grey?

me: Yeah…

him: I didn’t know you were dyeing it… looks nice.

And I can relax again.

The grey is about a finger width long now. Surprised he had to see me that up close to notice. I could ask him to get more dye… but I guess if he’s fine with it I can save myself some hassle. 

Maybe no play for a bit or downgrade to hand action… I note that I have not “serviced” him once this whole time. He does stuff I lay there. I try to move some. I think this is just his preference. Unsure if he fucks other students. He does come back late sometimes so maybe just not in his dorm. Have not asked.

Talked short story #11+12 with Marcus today… big news at end.

Marcus: Since we’re halfway through… what would you say to a celebratory dinner?

Darius trying to hide surprise.

me: Sure… if Miles OKs… 

Marcus: Have Darius let me know. Tomorrow night maybe. I can pick you up before I leave campus. 

Which I guess tells me what he gets out of this… ha! Still hoping Miles OKs though. I do like Marcus and really enjoy the talks so hopefully longer talk over dinner. Plus… caf food getting to me. Did not clarify if this is resturant or his place… Have historically disliked resturants but feel like all these students around me is getting me more comf. with stares. That or people are staring less.

I said this in notes already… wow is #11 so so bad and Marcus agrees. I think I hate every romance… tiny gets sweeped away by big strong (so maternal if woman) lover and I am supposed to swoon. I get that there are not many recent tiny authors to choose from so some garbage will slip through… but come on.

Every author bio is the same. Here is your author he put out a bunch of boring novels and then he shrunk at 40 and that didn’t stop him from putting out more boring novels and also his wife and kids take care of him. I say he but women are the same. I guess its obvious that people in cages don’t get published much… can’t fault the book for that but I think it contributes to their impressions of tiny life. Characters get universal support or they are put through hell… stuff from not tinies is kind of better at that middle ground.

Favorite so far has been an old story for class… Whole family drama happens over years while tiny in living room cage watches in silence entire time. At the end they demand she pick a side… she sits watching silent until they tear each other apart again. Ha!

Students hated that one. She did not make a sound and they say the author gave her no initiative. I did not contribute to that discussion… I see the irony. 

Caf w/ Darius and Miles. Miles mad a mailroom stop.

Miles: Here… my apology for last night…

Tears open bag and plastic baggie of ~10 books falls onto the table.

Darius: What happened last night?

Miles: I hurt his leg. (embarassed. Darius must know we fuck by now?)

Books are secondhand. Only names I recognize are Kurt Vonnegut and Arthur Miller (have not read either) but I get the impression this was an old guy’s collection. Old guy collection selling secondhand you know what that means… probably running out of storage space. 

I did say thanks. Leg already down to a slight ache. I think he is more hurt by it than I am. All forgiven ─ I have some old guy books and Miles is O.K. with the dinner date (not sure he grasps the implication… oh well).

Of course I complain when I am roped into another drunk frat night but by now that is just my “role”.  I have to go “don’t you have class tomorrow?” and “lay off the pizza” and “it is past midnight!” and everyone gets to pretend I am their dad and tells me to fuck off. I should be saying you pussies its only midnight… I used to stay up for days. Coffee and blow and men’s room sex but what do kids these days know about that… probably for the better. 

They took me to the gas station and let me pick a protein bar. Secretly I think many of them would like their dads trailing them on a stoner snack trip. They’re really grasping for straws with the “tiny questions” now… trying to compete for ridiculousness. 

Rohan: Do you think if you rode a mouse you could steer it like a horse?

me: A mouse is like dog size to me… 

Lily: Have you ever seen a molecule? (trying to piss off STEM guys)

Whenever I’m not in a conversation Peter seems to swoop in… Desperate for grown-up talk I think. He likes talking about his meetings with school admin and nationals guys and complaining about parking and I go uh-huh uh-huh. Yeah man… parking here is so fucked up. 

I do like them but I am still the oldest by 30+ yr… Sometimes I miss chatting with Bill. So low energy compared to all this. I dont know maybe it’s good for me. 

[microposting]

Ch. 9. Dinner party.

Al sitting in bed judging me for writing right now… ha. What can I say. I admit it I’m a weirdo.

Crazy night and trying to get it down before I sleep sue me. Miles handed me to Marcus at 6… there was no dress code but hes wearing a nice coat so thank god I put on a button up and some corduroys and double thank god I did not wear my whole suit because that would have been way too much. Drove me to house, small but well decorated. 

Marcus: Sorry for not letting you know earlier but I do have a partner… he’s excited to meet you.

I think great great smashed between a couple my absolute favorite.

Marcus lets me off on the kitchen counter. There is a tiny. Chubby asian man in his 40s. Shirt sleeves rolled up and wearing an apron. He approached me… I admit I stared. He put out his hand and I stared at that too. Finally reached out and shook it. And I think I shook for a while because at a point he just laughed and pulled away.

him: I’m Albert… you must be Puck. It’s really nice to meet you.

me: Yeah… (come on dude)

Marcus: I premade some soup and bread so I’ll heat those up… Looks like Al is working on your salad. 

Al leads me to the wall. A cord in the outlet leads to a tiny size food station. Counters oven knives even a fridge. Food processor full of chopped nuts and cheese and on a large island he is working on some arugula and a strawberry. 

Al: You can help if you’d like.

me: Oh… I’m not much of a chef.

Al: No worries… it’s fun.

Marcus is busy with his soup. Al hands me a large knife and watches me awkwardly carving off bits of strawberry for a bit. Horrible dawning realization… I am a grown man and do not know how to use a knife. He has to show me how to take off slices and cut those slices in a grid… at one point he realizes my hand is under the knife and has to leap in to save me. 

Does not help that I keep trying to look at him. He definitely noticed… smiling and giving me cute looks but that is not why I am staring. He’s shorter than me. It is hard to put into words… it is like my body but standing a few inches away. His hands are my size… his face is my size. When he hands me something I fumble and my fingers crash into his. I do not remember how to interact with a body this size. 

When I look at him I imagine touching every part in sequence. His hair looks finer than mine. His skin is softer a little younger of course… Want to grab his stomach. How exactly does a tiny get fat? Is it this kitchen? Does not need to wait for other people to make him food? I find myself really entranced by the fridge… bits of produce and cheese and meat in there to grab whenever. Has a separate massive freezer too. All off one outlet. Wow. Wow. I wonder if Miles still feels guilty about the other day…

On Marcus’s dinner table there is a smaller dinner table with two chairs. Al and I sit side by side facing him but I still want to look at Al. Meal also very distracting… soup and bread sure but I have not had a salad in how long? Especially a salad where everything fits into my mouth. Marcus kept talking about literature and I think I said a lot of confusing stuff because I was not paying attention. Awful guest. 

Marcus: Now if you’re interested… it would be nice to have you stay the night… (Al giggles… they planned this)

me: oh yeah sure if Miles is O.K. with it

Marcus: I’ll get in contact…

Marcus and Al were together 3 yr when Al shrunk and it has been 5 yr since then. Al does tutoring online I think more out of boredom than for money. Cant imagine a house like this coming from a double income. They asked me some questions too but once the possibility of fucking Al was in my mind I kind of struggled to care about the convo. Yes I’ve been tiny for a very very long time now let’s all eat our soup faster. 

Finally I was on the bed with Al. Tore off my clothes tore off his clothes I think I scared him a little. Holy shit I have not wanted anything this badly in so long. Kept grabbing and kissing. Wanted to feel every part of my body against every part of his. Cocks against each other but it almost felt incidental. I wanted his belly on mine his thighs rubbing mine I wanted to feel my fingers wrapped around his wrists. 

Al: Woah… didn’t think you were the dominant type.

Am I? I just want to touch and grab and rub everything. I get a few minutes of this almost delirious… and then Marcus slams his big foot down on us.

I have never in my life more wanted to scream at someone to PLEASE! FUCK OFF! But I look back to Al and he is red and giggling. He looks back at me with a smirk but seems put off… I guess I had a pretty intense expression. 

Spent the rest of the time kind of grumpy… I think it showed. Rest was just normal sex stuff except there were two of us… barely even touched him. 

Al: Can I show Puck the bedroom?

Marcus: Wow… leaving me cold tonight huh…

Al has a full two story house next to Marcus’s bed which he tells me he bought with his own money. Inside is very similar to the big house but bolder. More plants too. I feel like he made most of their design decisions. 

One of those houses with “the works” ─ but Al says he barely uses it. Makes sense to me considering how “into” the size diff. he seems but what I would give to disappear in here for a few days… Being so immersed in this scale is bizarre. I feel huge and clumsy and kind of like a child at the same time.

Kitchen with another whole fridge and freezer (off and empty for now), drained pool, big couch with TV, dining table, huge bath. 

Al: It makes me kind of sad sometimes… just seems so hollow. Maybe should’ve gone with something smaller. (O.K. give it to me then) Room for two in that bath… if you want to visit again some time.

me: Why not tonight? (trying to sound flirty did not work)

Al: Marcus has to refill the water tank… I’m sure he would if I asked but he has grading to do. 

We went to the bedroom and I was very eager to suck his dick. Starting to act a little more normal thank god. Getting the craziest thoughts still… I have never been a foot guy but getting the urge to suck his toes. Want to put everything in my mouth like a little kid ha. Control your self!!

Al gave up on me and went to sleep so Ive finished writing in the study. Having a study. Imagine! About all I had to say. Hopefully I dont get too grabby tonight. 

[microposting]

Ch. 10. Puck starts his finals project.

Started work on my end of semester project which I guess I am doing. Asked Miles for some extra paper as to not clog up the journal. I am sketching out my slideshow and then Darius or maybe Miles will help me convert it. Miles started explaining powerpoints to me… Miles your uncle was a teacher. 

I think the rest of the class thinks they are getting some exclusive tiny POV social commentary but I kind of want to do a normal presentation like any other student would. “Well personally as a tiny I think” seems cheap. The other day someone (not in class) said “person of shrunken experience” at me and I laughed out loud on accident. Sorry but I am still a middle aged white guy. 

Torn between tinies in the romance genre and tinies in reality TV (I asked Marcus if that counts as fiction and he laughed and said obviously). Both things I am a huge haters about ─ I thought “hater” died off but Darius says its back. Recession indicator. 

Miles: How’d that dinner date go by the way?

me: It was nice… talked about books a lot…

Not sure if I am “allowed” to talk about Al but I assume not. Seems private-not-secret. I kind of assume this is at Al’s request but I do still think students worry about offending me. Maybe Marcus thinks if his students knew about Al they would tiptoe more. Or maybe he just doesnt talk about his personal life at work. People like that exist you know. 

Miles: Hey I should ask… did you have sex? (I startle) I think it’s fine if you did. I want to know for STD risk and stuff.

me: Yes… I get a full panel most years at my annual. I didnt ask Marcus about his status. If you want I can get a test done online whenever. There’s a site its pretty cheap…

Miles: Probably smart. Hey I still need your medical stuff. At least your past injuries.

me: Right right just give me a bit… there’s a lot of journals.

Miles: Whenever you can…

I really should. Now that I have other stuff to read and the project and I am getting more in depth with my short story critique and I am always getting hauled off for whatever frat bullshit I have not really wanted to reread journals. By the way… wow so enjoying Vonnegut. Want to do whole long entry about Cat’s Cradle because wow. 

24 hr and I still sometimes move and feel touch on me again. Very distinct flash of fingers wrapped in mine. I try holding my own hand but it just seems sad… How long do I need to wait to ask for another visit before its no longer obvious I want to touch Al again? I would like to lock both of us in that house for a week or two then Ill calm down. 

Might do reality TV for the excuse to binge watch garbage on one of the frat TVs. Did a little this afternoon. I am really impressed by how bad it is. In one of them they keep zooming in to show the guy’s expression but they have not adjusted their cameras so every shot he is too blurry to make out. Ha!

Around 2005 tiny gay dude becomes the funniest thing on the planet. The guys they get are really playing into it too… Where do they find these people? Where are they now. I have always heard shrinking is random but what are the odds I meet one tiny ever and he is also gay… but probably if he was not gay I would not have met him.

Have not fucked Miles since I hurt my leg but he has been real cuddly + kissy ha. Probably the weather. Actually not that bad… never had a cuddler before. Joining him on afternoon naps and I lay on his lap and get back rubs during movie nights so I guess everyone knows though no one has asked any questions. 

Realizing Peter may have been hitting on me. He seems to have backed off since Miles is “staking his claim” more publicly. Kind of figured literally any students would have fucked me by now… Always thought owner didn’t have much effect on other peoples interest in you but looking back Bill was probably encouraging it. Used to joke with his friends about what a slut I was and then they take that as permission. Guys trips were fucking exhausting ha…

Students keep joining me for reality TV watching and they get to laugh at it and its fun so I think I will be going with that. I can only withstand so many love stories. 

[microposting]

Ch. 11. Miles sees something he shouldn't have.

Please note: from this point onward, this story will include darker themes. Specific warnings are not provided.

He read the first journal. I dont know wt to do. Hiding in toilet - sick + shaky. So so dirty like bugs on my skin. Wish I could kill myself. Keep trying to throw up and cant. He keeps talking. I want him to shut the hell up.

He left and I came out and tried to wash myself. Back in toilet. Trying to put into words.

Came back from tinies class in great mood Miles grabbed me from Darius gripped in both hands and curled up in bed and held me to chest

-Im sorry Im sorry we didnt know we shouldve figured it out we shouldve done something nobody did anything

-Miles what do you mean

-Im sorry I just wanted to check the medical stuff and I saw the 1st one was 1985 and I picked it up and I couldnt stop reading

-Miles let go of me

-I didnt know you were 15

I screamed at him I shouldn’t have but I tore away and swore him out. I dont remember what I said. why did you do that + how could you + what am I supposed to do now. I collapsed and said put me back in the cage and he did and I am still hiding in the toilet even though hes gone

I came out to lay in my bed. Miles came back and sat at desk. 

Miles: I’m not gonna sell you.

me: What are you talking about…

him: You said I should just sell you. Im not gonna sell you.

I guess I did say that.

him: Do you think I think you’re gross because my uncle was a pedophile?

Maybe I said that too. It isn’t that but I don’t know how to say what it is. I didnt talk. 

him: Is that why… he did all the hair removal

me: Im an adult.

him: I know you’re an adult. 

me: What was I supposed to do. I was a gay 15 year old. I was already fucking guys. My parents hated me. Do you have any idea what wouldve happened if I went back to my parents. 

him: Im not saying that.

me: He was the cool teacher. I was already fucking him. He said I could take you to your parents or I could take care of you if you want. What was I supposed to do. 

him: Jesus Christ

me: Well what else was I supposed to do? (I think I screamed) 

him: Im not saying that. Should I leave again? 

me: I don’t know 

Hes sitting in his bed and doing homework and Im sitting in my bed with the covers pulled over my head because I’m DEFINITELY AN ADULT. 

Miles left for dinner. Turns out I did want him to leave. I took my scissors and cut off all the brown hair. It looks like shit but it’s gone. 

He left the chest a total mess. Stupid giant fingers. Everything out of place. I reread 1985. Ugly clumsy handwriting. The original memories are “gone”- I reread+reinvision so much it is just copies of copies of copies. I’ve thought what else could I have done a million times with no answer. If I went to my parents who even knows if Im alive right now. What could “third option” be? Tiny gay boy surviving in woods? HA 

Miles came back and spoke very slowly.

“Puck… I get that you did what you had to… I’m sorry if you don’t want to talk about it… I feel like I have to… b/c there were 40 years where anyone in my family could have done something and no one ever did. I didn’t do anything. My mom didn’t. My grandpa didn’t. Maybe you’re over it… but I don’t think you are. And Im definitely not.”

I take covers off my head. He is surprised by the haircut but doesnt speak. “What could they have done. Someone else is my owner and they fuck me too.”

“Do you feel like you can’t tell me no?”

I laugh and his face drops and I feel awful. “I can’t tell anyone no. Why else would anyone take care of me.”

He rubs his face. “Oh God. I’m doing it too. I should’ve realized. Shit. Shit.” 

“Whatever.” (VERY GROWN UP)

I study him carefully. His eyes dart, his fingers drum, his leg bounces. He is thinking hard and trying to calm himself. I glare. I know I am being ridiculous but I cant stop myself. 

“What do you think I see you as right now?” I know what he means but all I do is grip my pillow. “Do you think I think you’re childish? or gross? or that it’s your fault?”

I dont know what I was trying to say but I just cried. He offered his hand and I leaned in and he picked me up and held me to his chest but I dont know if I even wanted him to. I feel like a child this whole time… he isn’t helping. And of course I finally throw up… here. 

Not that I wanted to. But it did get me back in my cage and get him out of the room. 

I am 55 years old + I look it and 90% of the time I act like it too. The rest of the time I am a stupid whore 15 y/o. Why do I kid myself… there was always a “third option”. Third option… dont fuck your freshman year English teacher. 

[microposting]

Ch. 12. I'm sorry.

I slept bad. Miles brought me breakfast. He said he told the caf ladies I was having a bad day and then gave me an omelette with very tiny chopped veggies and a big cup of coffee so I guess hes not that mad at me. I do like the caf ladies.

Miles: I’m sorry about last night. I shouldn’t have read your journal and I shouldn’t have pushed you like that.

This is where I should say “I’m sorry too” but I can’t find the words. 

Miles: You know you’re not immature. 

I’m not until I am… I’ve been in this situation for a long time… and I learned that it is best to keep myself bored or I start acting like a bratty kid.

Miles: I don’t think that it was your fault.

I laugh a little and he pays attention.

me: Probably shouldn’t have fucked my English teacher. 

Miles: Your English teacher shouldn’t have fucked you.

I understand what he keeps trying to do. I dont know how to explain. Every time I’ve tried to write it out I spiral and puke and piss off Bill being a “moody little cunt”. I said yes. He said do you want to stay with me I said yes. I made those decisions. But if I did everything right and my parents still loved me and took care of me I wonder if my life would be any different now. I hope my parents are dead.

Miles: Sorry I keep getting snappy but it’s frustrating that you’re so resistant to talking about this. Obviously it’s eating you up. I don’t want you to be secretly miserable all the time. I dont think you’re hiding it as well as you think you are. 

His voice is muted through the plastic. I know how it looks. Literal wall. I dont think I could bring myself to say anything if the cage wasn’t there.

Miles: O.K. Whatever. Whenever you wanna talk.

Again… the part where I say “wait! I’m all good let’s talk right now!” but I’m not and I dont want to. At the end of the day Miles is still a kid and I don’t expect him to “get” any of this on any helpful level. I have been living this life for forty years and he has only been alive half as long. 

We’re pretending it never happened now I guess… This is my preferred option but I am still grumpy. Darius picks me up for study sesh… keeps giving me “looks”.

me: He told you didnt he…

Darius: Yeah…

me: Shout it from the mountaintops…

Darius: No just me. He really didn’t want anyone to overhear actually… Just wanted my advice on how to deal with it. Yeah, I realize now why you might not want me to know. Sorry.

me: What is your advice.

him: Honestly… I didn’t tell Miles this. But I don’t think 15 is that crazy. A lot of my friends started getting with teachers that age. (“started” ha) Not that it was a good thing…

Project is mostly a timeline of tinies in reality TV. Doing a little bit of “where are they now” because people enjoy that kind of thing. Overall trend is tinies get to “say what everyone is thinking” because everyone can just ignore them… plus comic relief. Very obvious to me that this is all scripted + interviews that I can find confirm that so definitely something producers were doing on purpose. 

After presentations we go into final papers and Marcus says I “don’t have to if I don’t want to” which I am pretty sure means “please don’t make me read another paper” so maybe I will just write one on my own. I know everyone will get very very busy during those last two weeks (esp. Miles as a math nerd) so it will be good to have something to do. Then I guess he takes me home for break… Christmas break is a full month haha… ugh.

Miles: Are you O.K. with your name?

me: What?

Miles: Like… Puck is what he called you.

Are we saying it like that now…

me: Yeah cause I liked it… its just a cute nickname. It was my favorite Shakespeare.

I get why Darius kept his mouth shut. I think Miles has some kicking and screaming stranger kidnap scene in his mind. Or “fuck me or I fail you” thing some people thought that too… 

Still acting like he’s mad at me… I’m sure if I asked he would say he isn’t. Still havent fucked since he hurt me, now he’s not cuddling and barely even chatting. Feel too awkward to ask if he can at least let me out to hang out in living room so I am back to reading and biking. Halfway through the new set of books now… Faster than I thought. Does “tiny library” exist online anywhere? Like how Netflix used to be… ship me books + I read them + ship them back… 

Threw up again. He’s never brought it up so I dont know if he can tell it apart in the toilet tank but before it was never more than once a week… oh well. 

[microposting]

Ch. 13. That's... rare.

Presentations went good. Added a bit about tinies in tabloid journalism too and people liked it. It is kind of funny what a field day these mags have when a celebrity shrinks ha. 

After class… last short story talk with Marcus. Darius had a meeting with another prof. in the building so just me and him. Marcus asked if I wanted to come over again “before things get crazy” yes please… 

Marcus: Al said you stayed up late writing. Didn’t know you were a writer.

me: Nope just a journaler… 

him: Journaling is writing. How long have you been doing that?

me: Woah… long time. Since I shrunk. (he makes a face) What?

him: That’s… rare.

He explained… Obviously none of the short stories were from pet tinies but apparently very very few writings from pet tinies exist at all, and most of them that do were from people who were pets for maybe a few yr.

Marcus: No pressure… but this is kind of my field. I have specific scanning equipment for tiny writing. I know basically everyone who studies tiny literature and I think… if you would be willing… they would find it really valuable. 

I shrugged and said maybe Ill think about it. I think I played it pretty cool but I felt kind of panicky. Just the other week Miles was the first person ever to actually get into my cage and start reading my journals. I never thought about it before but that made me freak. I have felt very protective ever since. Every time I get home I check the chest to make sure it looks the same. 

After Miles gets back from class he gets in his bed and cuddles me on his chest. Rubs my back with his thumb and stuff quiet for a bit.

Miles: Do you think you could learn how to say no? 

me: Huh?

him: Do you think it can be too late I guess. No, not that. I want to know when you’re not enjoying yourself. Do you believe me?

me: I am enjoying this. 

him: But if you’re not, do you think you’d be able to tell me? Or like ask for it. 

I kind of don’t know how to respond and start to feel like he’s talking to himself.

him: I’m scared that you hate it when I touch you so I stopped and I felt like you hated that even more. If you do want this then why can’t you ask me?

me: I’m sorry…

him: No, no… Like what do you want? What do you actually want not what you think I want you to say? 

I shoved my face into his shirt and covered my head with his arms like a stupid fucking tantrum and he just waited and stroked my back with his thumb.

me: Can we just go back to before? 

Didnt need to see his face to feel the disapointment.

him: …O.K.

Always a wrong answer…

Lily is teaching me how to play video games. She said that she needs to do this or otherwise she will have to study. We tried playing Zelda but the controller is too big and I couldnt react quickly enough so she tried Animal Crossing which I was better at but dont really see the point in. I did like the fishing.

Thinking about getting Darius to pick me up from the cage to drop me off with Marcus so Miles does not have to know I am bringing the journals with. Even if he does not say anything I am worried he will be offended that I didnt want him to read any but I am letting Marcus scan them and maybe letting a hundred people read them. 

I have been thinking about it and have decided to ask Marcus if he can scan them and then I can take time to think about what I am okay with him doing with the scans. And I definitely do not want him to scan this journal at least for a few months… closing it out soon and then I want to rest on it for a while before anyone else reads. The prospect of other people reading is making me more self conscious writing this as well… I am thinking should that have been a contraction… should I stop writing “+” and all. I don’t know maybe I never let him scan anything this year on so I dont get all in my head about writing.

Hanging out on desk and Miles asks “is there anything sexual you actually enjoy”.

me: I dont know… I like riding dicks. I kinda like hands… 

him: Are you like gay gay?

me: Yup… 

him: Man. I don’t even know what I am. I feel like being in a frat doesn’t help. (ha) 

me: That’s fine… you’re young. Take it easy.

I guess I gave the answer I would have gave a few months ago but probably honestly I would say I wanna fuck Al again… Maybe if I fucked him more I would get used to it and want to try normal size people again. I dont know. Would take me a long long time before I got there I think.

[microposting]

Ch. 14.

Marcus has an idea.

Darius brought me and the book chest to Marcus’s office… he drove me to his place. It felt very awkward to me but maybe that was just me. 

He brings me to his office. Al already hanging out on the desk… I notice this elevator device to the side so I guess thats how he gets around. Double impressive he got chubby with all this walking… 

Marcus gets machine out of a small box. It’s padded with styrofoam… looks delicate + pretty expensive. Lot of mechanical parts. He explains it all to me and I nod and dont really get it… some sort of vacuum arm that turns pages and a scanner. I watch him set it up in silence. Feeling sicker and sicker. Al I think could sense it. He held my arm as Marcus finished set up. Didnt get a word out until 1985 was between his fingers.

me: I should say. (he looks at me… it takes me a bit longer) I don’t think I said. I’m 55. So that’s from when I was 15. 

Marcus: Sure.

me: I think Ive got that one memorized. I regret a lot of things.

Marcus: You’re O.K. If you want I can skip it.

me: No… it’s important.

Just watching him pick up that first book made me nauseous so I asked if I could leave the room at least for the first couple. He took us to the house and I wound up in bed with Al. Still cant get enough of just touching him. He is very patient as I play with his hands. Dont understand how he isn’t as obsessed as I am.

me: Do you meet a lot of other tinies?

him: There’s only one more in town I think… older lady. But there’s meet ups and stuff. I can’t believe how lucky I am that you’re gay. And cute.

Not that I would say it to him… but what are the odds. Not that we’re both gay but that I would actually be into him outside of this context. I think I might be this obsessed with the body of any man my size. Maybe even woman. I know hes actually into me because he doesn’t seem to give a shit that our fingers fit together. (sorry Al if you do ever read this… I do like you)

(this takes me a long time to say again)

me: When Miles found out I was 15 he lost his shit.

Al: Marcus has been studying this for years, he’s seen it all. Nothing’s gonna suprise him.

About an hour later Marcus got us for dinner. I spent the whole time wondering if he was reading as he was scanning or maybe just skimming but still… Did not come up in conversation but I dont think that would be polite to mention ha. 

Marcus said… I got through three in an hour and you have 53 in there so this might have to be an after finals project. Got very freaked out imagining leaving journals with him then he said would you be interested in staying here over break.

Wow yes please. God. Instant relief… did not realize how much I did not want to go home with Miles until he said that. Of course I just shrugged and looked at my salad.

me: Sure… If Miles O.K’s it…

Marcus: ha or we just don’t give you back tomorrow

Al: Marc…

Gives him a warning look… weird + tense. 

No hookup this time and Marcus had shit to grade and Al wanted to be with him and I said I’m tired just put me in the house and I’ll see you later. Good chance to look around some more on my own. Books everywhere. I wondered if some were fake because I’ve seen those on sale but I checked randomly and all very real. Looked through his wardrobe like a creep. Lot of fancier stuff but where is he wearing that. 

TV in living room also real but not hooked up right or something. I pressed enough buttons that it wound up on MeTV. Bill was always making fun of his friends for watching that channel ha. Happy Days on… loved that show as a kid. 

2 A.M. according to Al’s clocks. I think I was kind of hoping for judgment. Obviously I have got it from Miles and Darius but they are kids so not a whole lot of experience to speak on... But people my age figure it is rude to say anything at all. I dont know what I wanted them to say. Sometimes I think it’s the worst thing ever and sometimes I think that is just life. Not like I was the only one my age at those parties way back when. Who even knows how all them are doing. 

How to even ask Miles about staying over… I dont even know how he feels about me right now. Maybe if I piss him off enough he will just want me out of his hair ha. 

Should at least try to sleep… I have to ask him tomorrow or I will just sit on it until the very last second. 

[microposting]

Ch. 15 - End.

Just for the break.

I kind of psyched myself up to bring up Marcus’s offer as soon as I got back to Miles but he interrupted me and I chickened out. Both of us seemed very anxious ha.

Miles: Early Christmas present… hang on.

He gets a cardboard box about two inches wide with bow tied around it out from his desk drawer and puts it on the table. Thin cardboard and not taped or anything just folded… He waves to it and I open it. There’s a chest inside, little bigger than mine. Made with brass and covered in I think real brown leather. Latch is kind of complicated… I have to put a couple fingers through and twist it a specific way to open. Inside is velvet.

Miles: Since yours is pretty beat up… anyways, no one else should be able to open this one. 

I think he is right. Cannot imagine someone his size using the weird latch.

me: Thank you… Sorry, I don’t think I can get you anything.

him: Course not… don’t worry about it.

And then yeah I didnt ask him… Darius already put my chest back in the cage so I moved everything over in there and then Miles trashed the old one. Which felt weird but yeah it was not pretty. 

Now he is studying and I am sitting on his desk writing and then I will probably read or go watch the procrastinators play video games. They are getting really into some Star Wars shit now… cannot believe they are still making those. 

Frat bros went to some dirty pizza place for dinner and I came with. I dont really see how this is different from caf pizza besides being more expensive and requiring more walking but apparently it is an ancient end of semester frat tradition that the staff seems very tired of. 

Somehow I am feeling my first pangs of jealousy here. Not really of these kids but those guys who started it back in the 80s. No chance I would have gone to this college and joined this frat and got shitty meat lover’s pizza at this place before winter break but man I could have or done some other similar shit at some other similar college. 

I maintain… cage life is not some sort of constant nightmare. But I don’t know maybe thats what makes it so really awful. It is just nothing nothing nothing and an occasional nice moment and maybe that is actually so much worse than the concepts people get in their heads. Maybe imagining we all have some kind of evil sadistic owner is more comforting than knowing that we are just sitting around for years with a guy who thinks hes helping. Since Bill died everything has been so overwhelming but if I went back to my old life from a year ago might off myself… ha.

me: Um… the other night when I went to Marcus’s I asked Darius to bring that old chest with. 

Miles: oh no kidding

me: Yeah… um sorry just didnt want to offend you… cause I let him see them but I didn’t want you to…

Still looking at his practice problems. I think he seems a little disapointed but I can’t tell if its just me or not.

him: They’re your journals, man.

me: He wanted to get scans of them… since apparently there isn’t much info about how pet tinies actually live…

That finally gets his attention I guess. 

him: Woah. Um, get my good side I guess.

me: Well we only got a few done… takes a while. (ugh gotta say it now) And he thought it would be helpful if I could stay at his place over the winter break to get it finished. 

him: Oh… (jesus) Is he like… good to take care of you for that long?

me: Yeah… um I don’t think Im supposed to tell you this but he already has a tiny.

him: Huh… I thought that was just a rumor. (pause……)

me: So…

him: Oh yeah. Yeah you can stay with him. 

me: Just for the break.

him: Yeah. For sure.

Miles has two finals done (one of his profs doesnt “do” tests…) and one to go but he says it’s an easy one… some engineering thing. It all just looks like crazy number bullshit to me but he gets pissy when people talk about how hard math is so I just nod like usual.

He is half packed for break. Looking over my cage… asks if I even want this whole thing if Marcus already has accomodations but I dont know I might want the familiarity. 

him: I’m worried you’re missing something but probably not… I can send you off with some cheerios. You liked those. 

me: Well he can get cheerios…

him: Sure but it’s polite. Ugh I feel like I’m abandoning you with a stranger… get him to call me sometime or I’ll get nervous. 

me: I think his tiny has some kind of phone set up. I can call you myself. 

He packs his stuff some more and keeps double checking that all his essentials are there. Anxious kid ha. Eventually sits down on bed for a phone break.

Miles: I did okay yeah?

me: Hm?

Miles: As your owner? For the semester, I mean.

me: Oh, yeah. Yeah, you did alright. 

[vinsmousseux]

Took some time away from work for a little photo reference study. I wanted to work on a different body type, so I went for a kind of squishier chubbier physique, I think she turned out quite cute.

As usual with these there's an uncensored nude version over on my Patreon.

[pokeballvictim]

When you play with a dog girl you're gonna want to get a treat out and hold it where she can notice it. Once she's got it in her sights, you want to carefully pull it away from her, waving it back and forth in front of your chest. This is absolutely the safest way to do it. She will not pounce on you and knock you over in her excitement to get the treat. She definitely won't want to thank you afterwards and notice that you're already on the ground, pinned under her. Don't ask why her cock is hard, just trust me. It's a good idea.

[stripedpaws]

our holy cnc and their treacherous rapeplay

[stripedpaws]

if you say shit like "RAPEPLAY DNI!!!!!" and then post things like somno or intox or, dare i say, overstim while they beg you to stop, you are posting about rapeplay too. you simply are not using the same word.

[mantisbreath]

And the fact that you, the rapeplay dni person, don't see those things as having the potential to be assault Really worries me and maybe you shouldn't play with them if you don't know what they actually imply.

[clover-keys]

agreed, and it's frustrating that these terms are used the way they are on here because in IRL communities with more experienced kinksters & better kink education, CNC is a wide umbrella term that encompasses many things, including but not limited to rapeplay. CNC is when someone consents to something that they either genuinely don't want or will pretend not to want by verbally/physically protesting.

"but if they genuinely don't want it, isn't it an actual consent violation—" not if they consent to it! for a lot of people, part of BDSM is being pushed beyond their comfort within pre-negotiated boundaries. (pre-negotiation is key here—obviously care must be taken to avoid crossing into coercion, but that's another conversation.)

"then how can you have CNC that's not rapeplay?" much like that "is kink always sexual?" poll debate, this is a confusion borne from the general misunderstanding of kink on this site. you can have CNC that's not rapeplay because kink does not always involve sex.

for example, you can consent to any of these: being spanked while you're crying and screaming. being held down and tickled as you genuinely try your hardest to get away. doing something that sensorily disgusts you. a kink educator i took a class from recounted a CNC scene where she was tied up and forced to eat her most-hated food.

forced orgasms and post-orgasm torture (and other kinds of overstim) fall under CNC and could be called rapeplay, because you can withdraw consent at any time, so touching someone beyond that would be sexual assault. somno and intox are particularly risky types of play because you legally cannot consent while asleep or intoxicated, whether you previously established consent or not. whether your personal definitions of rape and SA agree with the legal definitions in your area is up to you, but they're good to keep in mind nonetheless.

(editing to add: a huge part of what makes all of the above examples consensual is that you can safeword at any time!!)

how you personally choose to classify different acts in your own play (as rapeplay, CNC, neither, both) is your choice, but it's not immune to criticism, and it has the potential to reveal subconscious biases. every method of categorization is by nature imperfect, so it's not necessarily wrong to have a distinction in YOUR mind between rapeplay and overstim, for example. but as OP said, the problem is when you're arguing that these distinctions are universal and absolute, and making moral judgements about others based on YOUR personal, imperfect categories.

[girldixieflatline]

im literally hard

☆vids4sale☆tipjar☆wishlist☆fansly☆insta☆

[femmeblogger]

help me dry off?

[bdsm-chinese]

“Rebellious College Girl” — rooftop bully, now bound humiliated in school uniform and pantyhose.

Full vid added to Patreon Variant Tier Montreal 's Monster!

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[raethehater]

@boyeatter

[deactivatedog]

Thinking about fucking someone who's just a bit too tight, who's already gasping and whimpering just from the tip. Listen, I know what it's gonna feel like. I know it'll feel like rape, but you don't understand. There's no other way. You're just. Too. Tight. Too small. I have to be all the way inside, and stop whining about me pulling out. You're so fucking wet, you need me inside this way. I know about this stuff so shut up. Then grabbing them by the throat, their legs spread but shaking, spasming as you force yourself in and tears well up in their eyes. Their arms collapsing underneath them before they raise them to try and stop you. To try and push you away before you ruin their pretty little hole any further. But you're in too deep now. Too deep to stop, too deep to pull out. No way out but through, isn't that what they say? Tighten your grip on their throat and make them take it. Take it all the way, to the base, til your tip is kissing their insides. Making them blubber and curse and cry. Fuck. Just wait til you're bouncing on it.

[cream-doenuts]

took these right after waking up :3

tip me? 🫶

[lethalprincess16]

HRT has let my body develop like crazy. So here's a Lil girl bulge for you :3. Come on. Start barking for me. <3

OnlyFans

[longmoose03]

“Use your words, darling” as you strain against your binds and scream deeply against your gag