Milana wasn’t even supposed to be on campus, or at least, she was supposed to already be spending the day with Onyankopon, yet she was walking through the bustling student center instead, the hum of conversation and the clatter of coffee cups creating a steady rhythm in the background. She navigated the maze of tables and chairs, blissful brown eyes drifting over the flyers and posters advertising club meetings, upcoming events, and various student initiatives. The walls were alive with color, a chaotic collage of announcements vying for attention.
As she moved closer to the bulletin wall, she slowed her pace. It was quite literally a map of student life, every square inch covered in something. Posters for a yoga class, a flyer for a charity drive, or a newsletter for volunteers needed at the food bank. Milana’s eyes lingered on some familiar faces, their smiling photos staring back at her from recruitment ads for this and that. She snickered at the fact that this was the same photo from her acceptance letter pamphlet. That had her smiling faintly at the memory, scanning through the noise of it all.
Well, at least she found what she was looking for nestled between a flyer for a poetry slam and a sign-up sheet for an intramural soccer team was a bright pamphlet. The words “Sexual Wellness & Education” were printed in bold, clear letters across the top, the font modern and clean, the background a calming shade of teal, and Milana she reached out and pulled it free from the board.
She stood there for a moment, holding the pamphlet, uncertain about why she even picked it up. Her fingers skimmed the edges of the glossy paper as she took in the vibrant images. A pair of hands gently holding a heart, a figure walking confidently, and a diverse group of students laughing together. Beneath the images were short phrases like “Empower yourself” and “Your body, your choices.” Definitely nothing out of the ordinary.
She opened it slowly, and her eyes flicked to the first few lines: “Sexual health is an important part of overall wellness. Whether you’re looking for information about contraception, consent, or just want to learn more about your body, we’re here for you.”
Maybe it was the vibrant design, and the burst of colors that stood out from the usual drab flyers, but now that she started reading, it was a little hard to stop. Or… maybe it was because Milana had recently started thinking more about relationships… specifically intimacy.
Six months, the only relationship she’s ever been in and it’s already been six months of them being together. The thought alone was insane to her own ears. But, to be frank, it might be a world record for both of them given what Sasha’s told her about some of Ony’s dating history. She knows it’s all out of love though, and she actually does appreciate her bestie for telling her some funny stories of her boyfriend before they met.
Seriously though, if someone went on live while sitting across the table on a date, she’d probably get up and leave too.
Regardless of either of their previous struggles, she and Ony had been together for six months now, and this is becoming serious. He’s her first love, her first kiss, and her first everything. She'd never felt more seen, more understood than when she was with him, but this ad had her thinking about something different. They'd just never really talked about actually getting to sex.
Well, they have done other stuff. Like touching, and fingers, and dirty talk of course. But, ever since the night of their first date, Ony hadn’t spoken about the fact that she was a virgin. It was actually kinda nice at first, not having to worry about that aspect of their relationship, he seemed to just know when to step in and when not to pry. Most of the time his hands were respectful anyways, warm and comforting too, another reassurance that she didn’t know she needed.
The pamphlet made her realize she didn't know what Ony thought about these things. What if he wanted more? What if she wasn’t ready? Milana’s finger nervously wound around a curl as she replayed moments from their time together. Ony was always kind, always a gentleman. She trusted him completely, but trust didn’t mean she couldn’t feel a little nervous. It was normal, right? To feel a bit overwhelmed by something as serious as this? Especially when it was with someone she cared about so deeply.
What did she even know about it? Of course she took sex ed in highschool and everything, but they’re definitely not thorough in the slightest, or very informative outside of the biology department. The birds and the bees talk was definitely awkward as well, since her grandparents decided to spare her details that she didn’t learn about until Junior year, things that’d probably make her feel more prepared than she does now.
Milana sighs, at this point they’ve done enough to where she should have an honest conversation with Ony, but she didn’t even know where to start. Would he be understanding? Would he want to talk about it, or was she overthinking everything? For a moment, Milana felt a flush of embarrassment. She’d always been someone who preferred to avoid uncomfortable subjects, and though her friends might talk about their sex lives, it’d make her feel a whole lot better to actually get information from a more “neutral” party.
She pulled away from the wall she was pressing herself into unknowingly, a sea of people beginning to swarm the once spacious room, snapping her out of her own head long enough to actually check the time. Her jaw almost dropped as she raised her phone to see multiple missed calls from none other than the man himself. Sweet, loving, reliable Ony. Who had called her multiple times and had been waiting on her for at least ten minutes.
How does she even do this to herself?
Without another thought, Milana tucked the pamphlet into her bag, thinking about how she could bring all of this up, but that’d have to wait for later. Right now, she was cursing herself for not being athletic as she tried her best to run across campus, her heart practically feeling like it could jump out of her chest. Sandals clicking against the concrete as she huffed and puffed her way down to her boyfriend’s car, an apology already welling up on her tongue.
Connie’s voice crackled through the line, upbeat and sharp, even over the static. “You still there?” Ony pulled the phone from his ear, a headache coming on from listening to his loud ass for so long. “Yeah, I’m here,” He replied, waiting for Connie to finally tell him what he called to hear.
They’d been trading some connects when the other needed, and now Buzzcut has been making some big moves out of his Uncle’s garage. With how good things are going, he figured it might be time to start spreading distribution, and neither of them are the type to pass up on a little extra cash with the women they have. It’s a hefty price to pay when your girl looks good in everything.
“I’m gonna be straight with you,” Connie sighed, drawing this out already. “My Uncle said if the garage moves about ten grand a month like you say it will, then we’ll give you the lion’s share. You can take majority, but you’ve got to bring your usual foot traffic though, and he wants to double that figure by the end of the year. He’s fine with two every two weeks for now, but he’s not going to stay cool forever. We’ll talk all that later though, so keep it low, and it’s good.”
Ony stood a few feet away from his car, one hand holding the phone by his side halfway through Connie’s speech, tilting his chin up to see himself better. He looked back at his reflection in the tinted window, the sun beaming so heavy it was catching on his waves. Running his curved brush over his hair, smoothing everything after being tied down for so long, starting to get antsy waiting. All he wanted was to take his girl home and spend the rest of the day without a damn phone in his hand.
As he adjusted his grip around the brush, his eyes caught sight of something in his peripheral, shifting his focus through the window to see Milana finally coming towards him. She was moving fast too-actually-as fast as someone who hated running tried to. Her short little legs were moving like she was trying to outrun something, but he’d feel bad for her if there was any actual danger behind her. He could see her face scrunching up, her breath coming in uneven bursts as she fought to make her way to him. Her little arms swishing by her sides, all of her bracelets noisily jingling louder and louder the closer she got, which Ony patiently waited for.
He did have to turn his face away to get his smile and laugh out first before she could see, knowing that if she saw all it’d do was make him have to spend the rest of the day making it up to her. His hand bringing his phone back up afterwards, rolling his eyes when he hears Connie still talking on the other end, just filling the line with jokes at this point. Why don’t either of the people he went into business with take shit seriously?
“Let me call you back, C.” He said, the sudden perk in his tone should’ve been enough explanation for Connie as to why he was hanging up.
“O? You called me, Bro. And you’ve said two words in the last thirty minutes. We’re supposed to-”
Guess it wasn’t. Maybe the three beeps at the end of the line would be. His focus entirely turned back to see Milana start making her way down the entrance’s concrete steps, her small figure rushing slightly faster with the momentum of going downhill. She was starting to move a little too quickly for his liking, which had him take a cautious step forward and to the left, both of his arms stretched out just in case.
And then, just as he expected, Milana’s foot caught the edge of the last step. She stumbled slightly, her arms flailing as she tried to steady herself. His reflexes kicked in, and before she could lose her balance, his arms reached out, grabbing her gently from underneath her arms and lifting her slightly off the ground to steady her. He planted her firmly on the pavement next to his car, his touch, soft and ticklish on her sides, taking a step back to make sure she was okay.
“Slow down, FloJo,” Ony only breathed out of relief when he was sure there was no way she could trip, his voice light while trying to joke, but you could still hear the concern. “You’re not in a race, y’know. It’s the off season, Mama.”
Milana blinked up at him, wide-eyed, clearly still processing what had just happened. She gave a small, apologetic smile, her breath still a little ragged from the near-miss. “Sorry- I didn’t mean to... I was just…” Her words faltered as she bent over slightly, her chest heaving from the effort and exertion. “Sorry.” She reiterated breathlessly, looking up at him with a slightly embarrassed grin.
Ony didn’t mind. Not even a little. His hand reached out, brushing some of her curls away from her flushed face as he leaned in, calm as ever, and kissed her, slow and steady. A quiet message, that there was no need to rush, no need to apologize. He lingered for a second longer, then pulled back just enough to murmur, “You’re good. I’m here.”
Milana sighed against him, her shoulders loosening like she was finally letting herself exhale fully. Ony just smiled, the kind that melted guilt and steadied breathing. “Relax,” He added as he pulled back just enough to meet her eyes. “Don’t have to run for me like that. I’ll wait, always.”
Milana’s quiet laugh slipped from her lips as her heart finally began to steady. “I didn’t want to keep you waiting.” He opened her door for her in response, a small smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth.
“C’mere then, I’m ready to get us home.” Milana slid into the passenger side, still smiling, still a little dazed. Ony shut her door gently and walked around the car, dragging his fingertips along the roof as he went. When he slid in beside her, the car felt even better. He turned the AC dial up a notch, and it was suddenly much cooler, all her worries flowing off with a sigh.
“What were you up to today, Mama?” He asked, glancing over with that half-interested, half-nosy tone he used when he wanted the rundown but also wanted to tease her through it. “Something new in literature?”
Milana snorted immediately, unbuckling her shoes and sending them to the floor with two soft taps. “Ha. No. I wish. Arts administrators are still stuck in 1872.”
“That old?” Ony asked, like he already knew the answer but wanted to hear her say it.
“Ancient,” She nodded, stretching her arms over her head with a groan. “Today my professor told me, and I quote, ‘stop thinking like a thespian and start thinking like a poet.’”
Ony blinked slowly. “What does that even mean?”
“That’s what I said!” She sputtered, tossing her hands up. “I was like, sorry, didn’t know there was a difference. Last I checked, Shakespeare was dead, God rest his soul.”
Ony huffed a laugh through his nose, pulling out of the parking spot with his hand sliding automatically behind her shoulders. It landed between her shoulder blades like it always did, big and warm and steady. His thumb brushed her spine once, absentmindedly reassuring. “What did y’actually say?”
“‘I just wanted to show artistic expression within my work, next time I’ll use more direction’... blah, blah, blah.” Milana faked tears as she leaned into the curve of his arm dramatically. “I really need to work on my firmness.”
“Yeah, I think I’ve been saying that for a while now.” His smirk was instant, bright, all pearly white teeth as he checked his mirrors.
Milana elbowed him with no real force. “I am the greatest listener in the world, thank you very much.”
“Yes you are, Baby.” Ony kept teasing, but he didn’t argue either so she’d take her little wins. The music thrummed low, something slow enough that it made the late afternoon feel even softer. Milana tapped her fingers along the center console, catching the beat, then let her hand drift until her knuckles brushed his. Ony didn’t even look, his pinky curled around hers automatically, like muscle memory.
“You eat anything today?” He asked, using his other hand to rub his abs under his shirt, guiding the car with his knees on the steering wheel.
“Milana.” Ony smacked his lips, saying her name like it was a warning and a question all at once.
“I was running late,” She insisted, huffing to keep from whining like a spoiled brat. “And I was waiting all day on Edda from my group to ‘circle back’ like she said she would for her part of the project.”
Ony shook his head, his narrowed eyes threatening. “Why’re you always in class wit’ people who don’t do a damn thing?”
“Because God is testing me.”
“God wants y’to eat,” Ony muttered. The light ahead shifted yellow, and Ony slowed, but instead of sliding into the left turn lane toward their neighborhood, he stayed straight, drifting closer to the right, aimed toward the freeway ramp.
Milana blinked, her head lifting from where she’d been resting against the seat. “Where are we going?” She looked small and soft beside him, still unwinding. Her curls framed her face in loose, fluffy coils from the little rush to the car, one ringlet rested against her cheek like it refused to behave. She had one leg drawn up under her, the other stretched out, ankle showing off his name around her foot.
“Going to get some food,” He said. “’M hungry as fuck, and I know y’are too.” His hand left the wheel for a second, brushing the inside of her knee before returning. “What d’you want?”
Milana smiled, hummed, and wiggled her face side to side in the way she always did when she was indecisive. Then she sighed dramatically, melting back into the seat.
“Lena’s?” Ony sounded way too hopeful for somebody suggesting a place they went to every other week. His eyes cut over to her, wide and a little boyish, making her cheeks glow with adoration. “Milkshakes, and tacos, and burgers, and fries?”
“Yeah, sure.” She could feel her stomach growling in anticipation, and Ony pumped his fist in success before easing into the fast lane so quickly she was amazed that cars don’t actually move sideways.
But, with the freeway clear the open expanse was pretty much theirs, the sun stretched long over the hood of the car, the wind flicking at Milana’s curls each time he cracked the window, trying to be funny. Her hand drifted up and rested on his forearm where it sat on the wheel, thumb rubbing the warm skin there lazily. He glanced down at it, huffed a tiny laugh like she didn’t even know what she did to him, and then returned his attention to the road.
By the time they curved off the exit, the neon pink sign of Lena’s Drive-Thru came into view, with only a glorious three cars ahead when it’s usually packed. One of which already at the window, truly perfect timing. Ony rolled down his window and let the warm, salty air filter through, pushing against the huge cloud of vapor he blew out from his pen. The speakers crackling on with a soft “Welcome to Lena’s, one sec please!” from the intercom.
Milana leaned forward in her seat, peering over the dashboard like she was trying to see the menu even though she already knew it by heart.
“Should I try a hotdog or something?” She mused, randomly thinking aloud until Ony grimaced at her words.
“Hell nah. I got this, talkin’ ‘bout some hotdogs. They put that up there for the white–”
Before she could be cute back to him, the intercom chimed back.
“Hi! Thanks for waiting. Go ahead whenever you’re ready.”
Ony leaned in toward the mic like he was negotiating with the woman on the other line, with half of his torso hanging out of the car. “Yeah, lemme get… four crispy steak tacos with everythin’ on ’em. A double cheeseburger, no tomatoes or pickles. A regular cheeseburger with no tomato. Three fries, and two Neapolitan milkshakes.”
Milana’s head snapped toward him. “What milkshake d’you want?” He asked her to the side quietly, like he wasn’t already pushing it.
“Why’re you getting two? You gon’ tear up your stomach!” She whisper-yelled back, fully regretting the day she introduced him to the Neapolitan shakes.
“Girl, watch out, what’re you tearing up yo’ stomach with?”
She sucked her teeth, defeatedly, “Mm… chocolate and vanilla.”
“Uh-huh.” Ony nodded like he’d expected nothing else. Then turned back to the mic. “Let me get just a chocolate and vanilla as well.”
Order closed, confirmed. He sat back in his seat with that smug little satisfied grin, resting his elbow out the window and tapping quietly to the song playing because he could barely keep still. When it was their turn at the pay window the cashier slide it open with a grin.“Hey, O. How are y’all?” She said, clearly recognizing him on sight as Milana snorted into her hand. He couldn’t go anywhere in this town without someone knowing him or his name.
Ony slid his card out, holding it between two fingers lazily. “You already know what it is.”
“Yeah, Eren and Connie were here earlier too,” She teased, shaking her head as she took the card. “It’s like you all plan this or something.”
Milana perked up immediately. “THANK you!”
Ony took his card and the receipt back, shaking his head and trying not to smile as he sat between the two laughing girls. His resolve cracking only when she turned and brought them bags of hot, greasy heaven, wrapped in that Lena’s signature. “Good lookin’, jit, if you see Nicolo around let me know.” He said, taking the bags with one hand like they weighed nothing.
“Will do! Y’all have a good night!” She chirped, waving as he rolled forward and out of the line, the warm bag settling on his lap. The drive-thru lot was buzzing, but he found a shaded spot under a low, leafy tree and pulled in smooth, cutting the engine. The resulting sudden quiet felt soft.
“So what were you up to today?” Milana asked, holding out her hands to receive the fries Ony was passing her as he unwrapped his crispy taco, pulling back the paper to bite half away in one swoop.
“Nothin’ crazy. Ran a few errands.” He chewed, leaning back against the seat like this was the first time he’d been able to breathe all day. Milana took a slow sip of her milkshake, eyes on him, waiting. She always tried to wait for him to share first, trying to read him as he simply shrugged and looked up through the windshield for a moment. That was probably Ony code for many things, and she knew it.
“Had to break into Reiner’s house.” He said, finishing the taco in another bite as Milana’s jaw dropped.
“What do you mean?!” She coughed out.
“He acts like a little ass kid! Told him I was pullin’ up, and he tells me he ain’t home when I’m standin’ at the door.” Ony defended himself while pulling his burger and another taco out the bag to open up.
Milana snorted, already imagining it. “Did you knock?”
“No,” Ony deadpanned through a mouthful. “Already drove all the way there. Shit, ‘f I have to be up before noon, I’m gettin’ somethin’ out’f it goddamnit.”
She laughed around a fry, shaking her head. Ony pulled open the wrapper for the taco and held it up for her, “Here, take a bite.”
Milana leaned forward and took a delicate bite, trying to be cute about it, but the crunch was loud enough to make Ony grin. “’S good, huh?” He teased, pulling it back before anything could spill on her clothes.
“Mhm,” She nodded while chewing, and instead of taking it back, he just placed the whole taco in her hands as a silent encouragement to finish the rest for herself.
“I just–Thank you–” She said once she swallowed, still smiling, “I can’t believe you broke into his house.”
“I didn’t break anything,” Ony corrected, twisting open up his burger, offended by it being wrapped in the first place. “Door wasn’t even locked.”
“Which is worse!” She squeaked.
“That’s what I told him!” Ony pointed his burger instead of using his hands to talk like he was under oath. “But I’m lockin’ up behind him. The shit I put up with man–just ain’t right. Then I got Eren runnin’ with me so it’s an added headache.”
Milana’s mouth curved into a sympathetic pout as she slid a little deeper into her seat, angling just enough to rest her head against his shoulder. Falling there to fit easily, like they always did. “Sounds exhausting,” She cooed to him sweetly. “My poor Baby.”
“It is,” Ony admitted, his voice dropping, softer now. He leaned into her on purpose, all that solid weight pressing gently like he was trying to keep her right where she was. He dipped his head and kissed her cheek, slow and unhurried. “So hard when I’m just tryin’ to get back to my Baby all day.” Then he nipped at the apple of her cheek, all playful and light.
Milana groaned and immediately started wriggling away, laughter bubbling out as she tried, and failed, to escape him. “Ony!”
“What?” His lips shameless as they skimmed her cheek again, warm and teasing.
“If you get ketchup or burger juice or whatever on my face,” She warned, trying for stern even as she laughed, “This’ll be the last time–”
“Last time what?” Ony snorted, completely unbothered by her tone, especially as she started unwrapping her burger like nothing was happening to her.
“Last time, period, buddy.” She poked his nose with her finger, pushing just enough to make a point, though he barely moved an inch.
“We really gotta work on your stern voice,” He laughed. “Can tell your grandparents wasn’t hard on yo’ ass.”
“They didn’t need to be,” She shot back, sticking her tongue out at him. “I was a good girl.” He chuckled and went in for the kiss even if her tongue was in the way. Nudging his lips to hers briefly and soft, like a punctuation.
“Yeah, well,” Ony said after a beat, pulling back just enough to look at her, thumb brushing once along her jaw, “Speakin’ of last times… think it’s time for me to finally move.”
Milana lifted her head, eyes searching his face now. “Really?”
“Yeah,” He nodded, casually. “Already got a realtor, and we met today. Figure it’s time I buy somethin’ instead of rentin’. High time I stay home for good.” He took another bite of his burger like it was nothing, but the way he glanced at her afterward said it wasn’t to him.
“Did you look at houses?” Milana asked, drinking down her shake while her attention settled on him, intently.
“We talked about what I want,” Ony said, lifting one shoulder in a half-shrug. He wiped his fingers on a napkin before ticking things off absently. “Gotta be in the city, close to the beach still. Something big.” He paused, considering. “Probably a condo though.”
“Close to the beach?” Milana echoed, eyes lighting up as she leaned back against the seat. “Are you trying to describe my dream home?” She sighed, a little dramatic, a little sincere.
Ony smiled small and knowing. “Hopefully.” Then, like it was the most natural thing in the world, he added, “I want you to come with me when I start lookin’ at places.”
Milana went still. Well… more like stiff.
Her mind filled in all the things he didn’t say. Keys on a counter. Her shoes by the door. Her–Their cat living with them in a shared space, waking up somewhere that held a forever together through furniture, and laundry, and grocery lists, and all the beautiful mundane. A future that didn’t feel like it needed to tiptoe around itself.
“Seriously?” Her voice came out softer than she meant. Then, just to be sure she wasn’t imagining it, “Like… really?”
“Yeah, Mama.” Ony turned toward her fully now, elbow resting back, gaze steady. “You’re gonna be there too. And if it ain’t perfect for you, then it ain’t for me.” He tilted his head, lips twitching as he picked up his brow. “What? Don’t think so after all the nights I spent at yours?”
“Well…I know…” Milana murmured.
She thought about all the nights he’d called her, when he would finally be getting off work. And still he would ask her so sweetly, almost cautiously, if she still wanted to see him, even though it was already late. How she’d always said yes. How she’d told herself it reminded her of the first night he drove her home like a gentleman all those months ago, when he’d slept on the couch and kept his distance because everything had been so new.
But the truth was, that night never happened again.
Every night after that, they’d ended up tangled together in her bed, pressed impossibly close without an inch of space to separate them. His hand would always find the small of her back, anchoring her there, and she’d fall asleep with her face tucked into his chest. Bonnet-covered curls rising and falling in time with his breathing while his snores filled the room. The first sleepover had truly been breaking the ice, the second? It already felt like a habit for them as an old married couple.
She shifted now, the weight of it settling in her chest. “But… don’t you want more say in your own place?” She asked quietly. “I mean–” She hesitated, fingers coming up to her mouth as she worried at a nail, food forgotten. “We… I’m not paying for it. So it just feels kinda weird, helpin’ you look.” Her voice wasn’t accusing. Skating on thoughtful and heavily careful, showing the subtle fear lying underneath, afraid of stepping too far out of bounds.
“I want you to come,” Ony said again, slower this time, like he needed her to really hear it. He shifted in his seat, forearm resting back, food forgotten now too. “That’s sort’f my job anyway as a man. To be able to show you that I can take care of you. That I can give you anything you could ever want.” He searched her face for a beat, softer at the edges now.
“I dunno,” Milana said, scratching at her head. She never did read Think Like A Man… or watch the movies. “Is that how your dad felt?”
The question landed wrong.
The change in Ony was immediate, not explosive, just sharp. His jaw set, mouth flattening as he stared ahead for a second too long. Regret tugged at her chest before he even spoke.
“No.” The word came flat. Final.
He lifted his milkshake and took a long pull, the cold clearly meant to cool something else. “He taught me everythin’ not to do.” And that was all he gave her of that.
After a second to himself he became quieter. “I’m goin’ off what I know my mom would’ve wanted me to do for you.” He glanced her way, just once. “And what your grandparents would want too.”
Milana stayed silent, listening. “I can tell they want you safe,” He continued. “Stable, with someone who can get you a house one day when you need it. No stress. No worryin’ ‘bout where you lay your head at night.”
The image of her grandparents, and how carefully they watched her life, how much they still didn’t know,rose up uninvited. Ony sleeping over. Ony and his job, Ony and his stupid lust inducing aura. Ony here, steady and constant. It felt… bigger than she’d admitted out loud. “Mhm.” She tumbled out after realizing it’d been quiet, trying to keep her voice even, but her thoughts betrayed her.
“You don’t have to,” Ony said gently, already easing back before she could overthink it. “If it’s too soon, that’s fine. I just needed to tell you regardless, Baby.” His hand rubbed slow circles into her back, reassuring as he was trying to smooth the crease forming between her brows. But the truth was, she didn’t want him to smooth it away.
“It’s not that,” Milana added quickly, “I think you’re right about my grandparents.” She hesitated, choosing her words carefully. “They’re… old-fashioned. Everything is very serious to them, and I think that’s y’know because of their generation and they’re immigrants so they definitely would really appreciate this. And how you are with me in general.” She smiled faintly.
Her eyes softened as she spoke, something thoughtful passing through her expression. She could see it now, the similarities she hadn’t told him yet. The way her Grandpè treated her Grann like she was something precious, even after decades, bringing her flowers in her rocking chair like the gentle man he’s always been. She knows they’d see the beauty inside of Ony in the same way… she just…
“I just wanted to ask you something too…”
The words slipped out faster than she meant, hanging between them once spoken. Her fingers twisted together in her lap, nerves finally catching up to her courage. It was also in this moment that she wondered how he was always so calm. Breathing even, no rush, just giving her space without pulling away, one arm still resting easy behind her shoulders. He watched her for a moment like there was nowhere else he wanted to be.
“Bigger than a house?” Ony joked, trying to lighten the air, and a beautiful smile came with.
The one that always got her, mustache curved with it, neatly kept. Dark brows lifted just a touch, expressive even when he was pretending not to be serious, and his eyes. Warm, cinnamon-brown, caught the low light filtering through the windshield against his rich, deep skin. He tilted his head, still watching her closely, even through the joke, ready for whatever she said next.
“Could we–would you want to–how do you feel about sex ed?” Milana blurted, the words tripping over each other on the way out.
For half a second, Ony just stared at her.
Then his whole face cracked.
He turned so fast he almost hit the steering wheel, laughter bursting out of him, deep and startled, like it caught even him off guard. His shoulders shook, head tipping forward as he tried–and miserably failed–to get it together.
“Good,” He managed finally, still smiling too wide. “I guess?”
He wiped under his eye with his thumb, breath hitching. “Mama, you gotta help me out here. You might need to explain that one.”
Milana groaned instantly, sinking into herself as heat crawled all the way up her neck. “Actually–” She squeezed her eyes shut through the embarrassment, “–can you just back over my head instead?”
She was done. Twenty two years had been enough, truly. “Anytime you’re ready…” She groaned dramatically, already reaching for the door like retreat was her last saving shred of dignity, but she unfortunately barely got it cracked before Ony’s arm slid around her shoulders. Drawing her back into him by carefully hooking his bicep around her face, squishing her between his arm in a soft, unescapable hold that forced her to relax.
He leaned over her, no stress at all, and closed the door himself before she could make another attempt. “Too late. Can’t leave now.”
Milana slumped back against him, eyes squeezed shut as she curling up in a ball since there was nowhere to go. “You can take us both then.”
He laughed again, chest vibrating behind her. “Counteroffer,” Ony offered, “I hunt down my ninth-grade teacher, and you can decide if they were legit or not.”
“They probably were, that’s not why I’m askin’,” She muttered behind his skin, peeking at him now.
“Then why’re you askin’?” He jostled her around, smile still there, voice patient. “And why’re you so funny?”
She huffed a small laugh despite herself, shaking her head. “Because I have no idea what I’m doin’.” At least she could write on her tombstone that she was funny. Ony’s laughter softening into something molted and warm as he held her there, nowhere else he’d rather be. “Sorry,” She sighed quietly once they settled, Ony’s hand jostling her again like he was trying to shake the apology loose.
“Stop apologizin’, Mama,” He urged. “Just tell me what you wanna say.”
Milana swallowed. Why couldn’t she be confident? Why couldn’t she be expressive, or a little more grown up, how about secure in herself the way she imagined other women were? Why was she always better at saying it in her head? If only they could pass notes back and forth, but this definitely wasn’t some elementary crush conversation to do so. Still, saying that–to him, had her lips trembling and clamoring together like a sad cartoon effect. The truth sitting heavy in her chest, tangled up with fear and embarrassment and the quiet pressure of being twenty-two and feeling behind.
“I don’t know anything,” She finally admitted, her voice coming out small, surprising even her. “About sex,” Her eyes dropped immediately to her painted toes like they held the answers she was seeking. “I only know stuff from high school. I’ve never had a boyfriend. I never got on birth control, I–” She paused, breath hitching. “I’ve never had to think about condoms, or babies, or… I don’t know.”
Her fingers twisted together again, knuckles pressing tight.
“But–” She glanced up at him quickly, then just as fast looked away, and Ony caught it anyway, the way her eyes softened when she was nervous. Big and dark, glassy with feeling, framed by thick lashes that curled downward when she dropped her gaze, hiding more than they revealed. “I just wanted to know how you felt too,” She finished quietly. “I guess… what would you want to do?”
The words hung uncertain, honest, and brave in the only way the truth could when it was as awkward as this. The car felt different all of a sudden, all cramped and even the food between them had gone forgotten, the smell of grease lingering everywhere. And Ony was thinking…
And she hated it, his quiet, calm face that didn’t show a single thing as he weighed things carefully, the way he always did when something was a big decision. Her words replayed in his head, not as a problem to fix but as something fragile she’d placed in his hands. He felt the trust in it, heavy and real. Felt the responsibility settle in his chest, steady instead of scary.
So when he looked at her again, he really looked, and scanned the way she’d folded inward, toes curled slightly, shoulders tense like she was bracing for judgment that wasn’t coming. He thought about how easy it would be to say the wrong thing if he rushed. How important it was not to laugh now, not to tease, not to let this turn into something careless. More than anything, he felt protective. Not possessive. Not proud. Just clear.
“Would you want a baby?” Ony asked suddenly, so wistful it sounded like he was dreaming, and it surprised him too. Milana’s whole face went warm in an instant.
“Yeah…” She said after a beat, voice shy but honest. “In like… ten years. When I’m old like you.”
Ony scoffed, rubbing his eyes before pinching the bridge of his nose with a laugh. “Stop sayin’ that. I’m two years older,” He protested. “You make me sound fuckin’ criminal.”
She smiled despite herself, shoulders loosening a little.
“Alright,” He said, calmer now, nodding once like he’d filed that away. “Not yet. I got it.” Then, gentler, “You wanna get married first?”
“Yeah, of course,” She answered quickly. “But that’s… far-future stuff. I think.”
“Okay.” He let that breathe. Then, careful, “And sex?”
She blinked at him, waiting for the joke that didn’t come.
“Before or after marriage?” He asked plainly.
Her brows knit together as she studied him, earnest. “What do you think?” She asked, needing his honesty, not a dodge.
“That’s up to you, Baby–”
“No,” Milana interrupted softly. “Let’s decide together.”
He exhaled through his nose, not annoyed, just thoughtful. “I can’t tell you when you’re ready.”
Her voice dropped. “How am I supposed to know?”
Ony didn’t hesitate, didn’t rush her.“You’ll know,” He said simply, and how he said it made it sound less like a mystery and more like a promise. She gulped, lifting a hand to rake through her hair, fingers scraping lightly at her scalp just to get some cool air on the back of her neck. Her pulse felt loud in her ears.
“I’m serious,” Ony said, steady as ever. “Don’t rush yourself. When you’re ready, you’re ready.”
She nodded, but her curiosity still buzzed, nervous and sincere all at once. “Did you feel…?” She started, then trailed off, testing out the window while trying to act unbothered. “Like…”
“I felt–uhh,” Ony cut in immediately, already shaking his head. “That’s different–” He stopped himself mid-thought, like he’d stepped too close to a line he didn’t want to cross.
Milana whipped her head toward him, eyes wide. “Different how?”
He laughed once, short and a little sheepish, holding up a hand in surrender. “It’s different? What d’you want to hear, Mama? It’s like a man thing different?”
“I’m just asking,” She said, not defensive, just honest. “I don’t have a reference point.”
Ony sighed softly, then relaxed back into his seat, turning toward her fully. “Alright,” He said, calm again. “I know this much.”
She leaned in without realizing it.
“When I knew,” He continued, choosing his words carefully, “It wasn’t confusing. It wasn’t pressure. It didn’t feel like I was supposed to do anything to prove somethin’.”
His gaze softened. “It felt okay… I was ready, I wanted to be there, it’s not like I had to.” Ony tried to read her again, searching her face. “That’s all I’m sayin’. If it doesn’t feel like that, then it ain’t time, and we wait.”
The car went quiet again, Milana swallowed, nodding slowly, letting that settle somewhere deep in her chest. “Anything else y’wanna tell me?” Ony asked quietly.
Milana hesitated, then exhaled. “I think I’m gonna get on birth control soon…” She rushed to add, softer, “For no particular reason.”
Ony nodded once, no judgment, no commentary. Just acceptance. “Okay.”
Then his voice shifted, all tingly and ticklish like he playing at her from the inside out, hips wiggling in the passenger seat in protest. “You want me to give you some sex ed?”
The way he said it wasn’t clinical. It wasn’t teasing either, and at least she knew she wouldn’t have to figure anything out alone. But, her heart stuttered at the implication behind it, and how unconsciously, she needed to felt a little relief as heat bloomed across her cheeks. Milana’s lips parted on instinct as she smiled, shy and crooked, eyes fluttering shut like she was bracing herself for something she’d already decided she wanted.
Her lashes rested dark against her skin, thick and trembling, and she leaned into him without thinking, shoulder first, then her cheek, fitting easily against his chest like it had always been meant to go there. “Sure,” She murmured.
Ony didn’t move right away, hand coming up slowly to rest at her side, whatever lesson he had in mind was going to be taken at her pace. And for the first time, Milana didn’t feel nervous about not knowing.
She felt safe enough to learn.
