supernatural sideblog II samgirl II all characters but mostly the brothers II boy king of hell truther II not strongly anti anything but definitely not a heller II wincest friendly but i'm really just here for the gen
Sam, Dean & Double Standards (by the narrative and by the audience)
These are all things that have been mentioned numerous times before. I'm more summarizing here to put it in one place.
The show, as well as the audience, works with a heavy Dean bias when judging actions, motivations or morality from Sam vs Dean.
Sam, when speaking about John's behavior towards them, or to John directly, is angry, defiant and a brat.
Dean, when standing up to John at the end of season 1, or calling out the wrongness of John's orders in season 2, he is brave, standing up for himself and protecting Sam.
Sam (over)killing Jake, or acting "cold" (like the other hunters), is a sign of evilness and darkness in Sam. It's a sign something is Wrong, something non-human taking over, something that must be stopped because it's not Sammy.
Dean doing the same (outside of MoC arc), being out-of-proportion violent, impulsive and mean, "when is decapitation not my thing?" is either Dean doing The Job or it's Dean just dealing with his feelings and should (and is) met with sympathy.
Sam's "good" traits, like consistent empathy and kindness, are a perfomance. He's just pretending. "Puppy dog eyes"? A mask. On the other hand, his justified anger in response to mistreatment, the moments where he is violent (like other hunters), or outwardly acts like John (even with completely different motivations), must be his true self and him "unfiltered". The real Sam holds an inherent evil in him and in these moments he is showing his true colors.
Dean's "good" traits are real. His "bad" traits, like his violence, his anger, his objectification of women, him acting like a direct copy of John at times and legitimately upholding John's ideals/rules, are 100% a perfomance. It's not really him, it's the trauma that makes him perform, because the real Dean is good and kind and misunderstood.
Sam being "rough" in bed (one of these examples being Sam being raped but viewed as "kinky sex" by the audience, and another being him while soulless) is proof that he is violent. Sam is a monsterfucker and Sam is a slut. Oh, and his dick kills women, which is super funny.
Dean's race fetish, Dean's porn habits, Dean's inappropriate comments about and directly to women, don't mean anything. He's just performing, because in reality Dean is a good lover and treats women right. Or, scratch that, Dean is doing it to hide his bisexuality, it's just shame, he doesn't actually believe all that! The poor fella.
Sam, when working with Ruby –who manipulated & groomed him, and who worked for the people that groomed Sam since before he was born–: not only the audience says he put a demon above Dean, that he was selfish/stupid or that it was a sign that he really must've had evil inside. But also Dean, who knew Sam worked with Ruby because he a) was trying to avenge Dean's death, and b) wanted to use his demon blood/powers for good and to take back his own autonomy/story, and c) himself pointed out and recognized that Ruby was manipulating Sam, still judged Sam for putting a demon above Dean and being selfish/stupid/a traitor and used it against Sam and to imply Sam becoming a monster/losing his humanity (=goodness).
Dean, when working with Crowley, the show framed it as a fun bromance, the audience viewed it as a fun bromance, and Sam was angry at Crowley, not at Dean.
Sam was a junkie, selfish, evil and a monster for drinking demon blood (/being manipulated into drinking demon blood after being non-consensually injected with it as a baby), despite killing less people during that time than they did using the demon blade or during any other arc. (Dean is the one that tells Sam to use the knife instead, because killing others is better than Sam becoming non-human/non-Sammy). Despite Sam's personality and feelings and motivations and goals of wanting to be “good” not changing during that time. Dean punished and blamed Sam for it through season 4 and 5, and it changed their dynamic forever.
But Dean, who refused to listen to Cain when Cain tried to let him know about the consequences of the Mark/addiction to the blade, was not only badass and cool, but he also was pitied and the audience as well as other characters felt for his struggle. The audience constantly talks about how it was all because of the pain he was feeling from Sam's selfish betrayal (setting a boundary and telling Dean he wouldn't violate, and wouldn't let a stranger violate Dean physically & psychologically against his will for months). Dean's situation was tragic, while Sam in his own situation was evil/bad. (And most importantly, Sam was there for Dean and tried to help him through it all, and kept believing in him to the end. He didn't give Dean an ultimatum or conditions in order to keep/earn Sam's love and acceptance of him. Dean did the opposite.)
Sam was solely blamed for the Apocalypse, for “freeing Lucifer”, but both Sam and Dean were equally manipulated into breaking the first and the last seal. Both of these seals were required to free Lucifer and to start the Apocalypse. Dean breaking the first seal is mentioned a single time in season 5, and then it's just Sam being blamed for the rest of it again. Charlie (the show) thanks Dean for saving the world in front of Sam, while only reminding Sam about the loss of the women he loved and liked as if it's a joke.
(Which also reminds of Castiel saying in season 13 “WE let Lucifer out of the Cage, and he never stopped being OUR responsibility” after Sam had repeatedly said “NO” to Lucifer in season 11 in order to keep him locked up. Castiel let Lucifer out ALONE, and he lied to them about it, and he went after Sam and Dean's backs about it, and yet, somehow, Sam still gets blame for it? The one person who said NO, repeatedly? And Castiel comparing his possession by Lucifer, that he spent watching TV in his head, and that he actively said Yes to out of his own will, to the decades of torture and violation and trauma Sam went through with Lucifer. The trauma that was so bad that everyone expected Sam to die from the memories (that CAS made him remember in the first place)).
Sam was blamed for “not looking for Dean” (who he watched literally explode + Crowley would've been more smug about it if Dean had gone to hell and last time Dean died he went to heaven + Sam was completely alone and had just spent months dealing with Hallucifer and the fresh trauma of the cage and soullessness + the weapon having a "kick" would imply "it kills both of you" and not "it kills one person and sends the other one to Purgatory" + Kevin already translated everything there was to know about the weapon as well). He was called selfish and a traitor for it.
But when Dean refused to look for Mary in season 13 (who went through the rift ALIVE, with Lucifer who let Sam and Dean live all that time, and with them having Jack to help them find her, and with Sam by his side), when he told Sam there was No Point in looking for her, because she was Dead Anyway, nobody said anything. "That's a completely different situation."
Sam was judged for trying to survive, for living with Amelia and Riot and finding hope in them, both by the show and the audience. He was selfish for it, and weak, and giving up. He was judged for Stanford as well, for abandoning Dean.
Dean living with Lisa is looked at with sympathy (sympathy for Dean, at least), by characters in the show, the writing, as well as by the audience. People were happy for his short time of normalcy. He was portrayed as the domestic Family Man who deserved a normal life after his life of struggle and hardship.
Bobby judged Sam for Amelia and "the non-agreement", but supported Dean with Lisa & Ben, and didn't like that Dean still tried to look for Sam, because Dean deserved to move on. Bobby knew Sam was alive, but he also knew something was off about Sam, and he knew Sam was hunting and not "safe", but he saw it as Fine anyway, because at least Dean is safe & happy. He even tells Dean directly "hunting means getting your guts ripped out at 30", that he didn't want that for Dean, but Bobby didn't say the same thing about/to Sam who was hunting and acting differently during the same time. If Dean being happy & safe means Sam getting his guts ripped out at 30, that's a compromise Bobby is willing to take.
Dean blamed Sam for not taking care of Kevin, of abandoning him when he needed Sam, telling him "Kevin was our responsibility".
In the very same episode, Dean scolds a grieving Kevin who just watched his girlfriend brutally murdered in front of him, telling him it's all part of the job. In the same season, Dean sees Kevin barely hanging on, mentally and physically, and instead of telling him to take a break, he gets him drugs/pills to keep him awake so he can keep working. He tells Kevin his mom is definitely dead, that there's no point in looking, because Kevin's usefulness is more important than Kevin's happiness and family. Kevin, who asks Dean to please not lie to him again, because it's gonna get Kevin hurt again, lies to Kevin and then immediately after Kevin gets killed because of that lie/omission of knowledge.
Dean gets to give an apology speech to Kevin for his death, but Sam is not allowed to apologize to Charlie because "you got her killed", despite Charlie having chosen to leave on her own, while knowing herself that she had a target on her back because of the book. The book that she offered to look for, with both Sam and Dean's knowledge.
Dean killing Amy –going out of his way to follow her after she left to live a "normal" life with her son that she was trying to protect and keep alive– was Dean killing a monster, it was Dean rightfully suspicious of crazy & delusional Sam's feelings/interpretations of Amy, the woman who saved Sam's life.
Sam killing Emma –who was like one feet away from Dean and about to kill him and met him 10 minutes ago– was jealousy and revenge.
Sam and Amelia was betraying Dean.
Dean and Benny was Dean finding a true friend, and defending and being loyal to that friend.
People want Sam to be “angry” and “defiant” again like he was in the early seasons, and complain about older Sam being too beaten down, but when late seasons Sam DOES stand up for himself or tries to argue, like in season 9 about Gadreel, or telling Dean off in early season 8, he is judged again. He's suddenly dramatic and selfish and whiny or ungrateful. He's being an infant.
Sam was the one who protected and fought for Jack while Dean kept trying to kill him. Sam was the one who convinced Dean to give Jack a chance. He's barely recognized for it. But Dean took Jack driving & fishing for a single day and suddenly Castiel says to Dean “you did more for [Jack] than any of us”. Dean would not have been able to be in the position to do anything for Jack, if Sam had not kept Jack close to them in the first place.
When Sam tries to save Dean from his deal in season 3 by using his powers, Dean tells him no. And when Sam tries to make a deal to bring back Dean in season 4, and when Dean is back and thinks Sam was successful in making the deal, he yells at Sam for it, tells him he shouldn't have. Sam tries everything to avenge Dean's death and clearly does not move on, and he gets punished for it. He follows the agreement about moving on in season 8, and it's also wrong, because it's a non-agreement and it's betrayal.
Dean is angry at Sam for voicing a boundary after Gadreel, interpreting it as "Sam wouldn't do everything possible to save me" (not what Sam meant). Dean mocks him for it. But Dean is also angry at Sam when Sam does everything possible to save Dean in S10, and despite Sam having told him multiple times that he wouldn't give up actively looking for a cure.
It doesn't matter what Sam does, it's wrong, it's selfish and stupid, it's ungrateful. It shows there's darkness in Sam. He's just masking himself with the good-guy act.
It doesn't matter what Dean does, his intentions were good and his circumstances tragic, and that's what matters. He is misunderstood and deserves sympathy.
'the boy with the demon blood' is either the most tragic or the most profound moment of sastiel's relationship.
On one hand you have Sam full of devotion and piety. Sam whose always prayed and trusted in some higher power because there was just so much evil in the world. And the first time he finally gets to meet an angel, the first thing it can say is reduce him to the boy with the demon blood. Just an identification of his sins and nothing more.
But on the other hand, you have Castiel, angel of the lord. One of the most powerful higher ranking angels in Heaven. Commander of an entire garrison and leader of both angels and man alike. He's who these angels look up to. The only thing to ever make demons truly feel fear for the first time in the show. And every angel wholeheartedly agrees that Sam Winchester deserves to die, that he's only alive because he's useful. He's the disease, a personification of humanity's greatest sins. And Castiel the all powerful leader who had been told this boy was evil and not worth saving, not only shakes his hand but clutches it between both of his and regards him with respect (more respect than any other angel at least) despite the abrasiveness of his statement.
Even when he calls Sam an abomination, yes, it hurts, but it's (unfortunately) the truth in that situation. But his thoughts on the worth of Sam's life do not reflect his perception of him. He defends Sam against both Anna and Lucifer, threatening them both with bodily harm or death if they even dare to come close to Sam. Season 4 and 5 do a wonderful job of showing Castiel trying to reconcile the idea that has been painted for him of Sam Winchester by Heaven vs the man he has met and knows is good and has even grown to consider a friend. Castiel sees Sam for what he is, even if what he is isn't always ideal, but he doesn't hate him for it. He just views each part of him as a part of the mosaic that makes him him, whether positive or negative.
And I wish more people recognised that yes, despite Castiel rebelling mostly due to Dean, Sam was a cornerstone in helping Castiel come to realize Heaven was brainwashing him with hidden agendas and prejudice.
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