Gay Hook-Up Site Glossary of Terms
Hi: Would you like to have anal sex with me?
Just relaxing here: I’m bare-ass naked on the sofa, sitting on top of an unfolded 33-gallon garbage bag and typing with one hand with a bottle of poppers in the other
Got pics?: Please send photos of your penis that I can store and masturbate to later in the mall food court bathroom
Can’t host: My wheelchair-bound mother and I share a room
Foodie: You’ll want to stab me at restaurants
Love to party: I don’t have any natural teeth left
No blacks: My Pentecostal upbringing makes me deeply uncomfortable with my recurring wet dream where Blair Underwood plows me so hard that I lose the power of speech and can say nothing but “yes, Blair!” and “fuck me, Blair!” for the remainder of my days on Earth
Anything goes: I have a particularly virulent strain of herpes that I’d love to share with you
I fucking hate Glee: Bottom